I can understand what you say, completely identifiy with that kind of relation with food. But... big difference is, you had a goal, and you achieved it, you even have some pics in one of your threads, you lost 60 pounds, that's like ...
a kindergarden kid. And one of your threads also mentions how saying good things about yourself helps your self esteem. You can do it, I wish I already had my ticker 60 pounds below, like you do! You are beautiful and strong, and you can do it, you've already done it once...
animo!