I haven't been on here in a while. I signed on a few times and read some posts but I haven't posted anything until now. I just don't understand what is wrong with me! I mean seriously! No matter what I do I can't get off my big but and try. I'm lazy! I don't understand what it's going to take for me to really get up and do this. Everytime I even think about eating right and exercising I think back to ALL the times I failed and gave up, and then I think to myself "I'm going to fail again so whats the use?" I need to not fail again! I need to be strong and STOP being lazy! In the past few months I have let my laziness, and my fear of what other people think take over and literally destroy my life. My food intake has gotten so bad. I'm eating so much more in one sitting and its disgusting! I know what to do to lose weight, and I truly want to do it! What the heck is my problem???? PLEASE HELP...SUGGESTIONS...ANYTHING!:? :
Last edited by ThisTimeIsDifferent; 01-27-2008 at 06:35 PM.
Reason: COLOR CHANGE
i know exactly how you feel..i've been big all my life.. when i was in 5th grade i was 200 and something and i've been dieting on and off since then..thanks to parents who were embarrased more then worried but anyways, then one day i went to doctor and say that i was 362 and said i will not get any bigger..i know that sometimes u do mess up and it's ok it just means that after you mess up the next day you gotta get back on schedule. plz dont let past failures mess up your goals. go for a walk..in the park i about an ipod so i could listen to music. i also love taking picture of nature so i walk around with my digital camera alot.. i hope you find the motivation that you need to...good luck
I can completly relate to what your saying. I started today and so far so good. Not eating homemade mac and cheese was not easy for me, I was so tempted by the leftovers while i was cleaning up the kitchen. I am still under 1000 calories today and i should add a few more to be close to the 1600 im suppost to get.
The best advice I can give you is to be patient with yourself. You did not get to be your size overnight and you will not change your habits overnight. Have you ever heard that it takes 21 days to make or break a habit? Maybe start with something small, like increaing your water intake by 20 oz a day? Or something that is doable for YOU. Then, keep track of your progress during those 21 days and when those days are over reevaluate and figure out something else to change.
You can do this...baby steps. Be patient with yourself. Check out the success stories on this board as well, they are incredibly motivating for me!
Stop being so hard on your self.. You are here because you want to change.. and that will take time.. You could start like i did .. with a 5 minute walk.. that is all it takes to get started . try to walk 5 minutes each day for a week then gradually build it up till you are walking 20-30 minutes.. a day . soon you will be feeling better and you can then start looking at changing parts of your diet. satrt making healthier choices and once you are comfortable with the foods you are eating start calories counting .. you will need around 2000 calories a day to start with so thats not hard to do . I think Calorie couting is the easiest way to keep a check on your diet . i eat well but still have treats as long as they are in my calories for the day . soon you will feel upto a better workout maybe an exercise bike or ellipitical?? you want to wrkout about 30-40 minutes day and eat round 2000 calories and you will see a big improvement in how you feel look and the energy you then have . VEggies veggies veggies fruit protien and carbs all impostartant to loose wight healthily and keep it off then after .
Losing weight is no easy task. It is like anything else we want. When we want it bad enough we dont give up. Never give up! If you fall off...pick yourself back up and get back on for the ride. I have lost over 100 and to be honest I thought I would never get to this point. But now, I look back at the time it took and I think "Wow, the time went by fast!" See, regardless if you lose the weight or you don't, time will not stand still. Might as well use your time productively and make a positive change for yourself. A year from now, you can either be where you are now or you can be (fill in the blank) pounds lighter!!
Change does not always happen over night. It may be a process and really you should enjoy the process. Don't make it a drudgery....otherwise you might not stick to it. Find some activities (or positive people) that you enjoy. Make them your focus. Anyway, I wish you the best. You CAN do this!
Last edited by RoyalAthena; 01-27-2008 at 07:23 PM.
I urge you to absolutely forget about past failures. THEY MEAN NOTHING - NOTHING. Luckily you get as many chances as you need at weight loss and the only time you need to be successful is the final time, the last time.
Okay, now having said that, you DO need to make the decision to lose the weight, once and for all. And you can do it. I used to think I was the laziest person in the world, but I really wasn't when it came down to it. I just hadn't wanted to lose the weight badly enough. That's basically what it boils down to - just how badly you want to lose the weight. Because when I *finally* wanted to lose the weight, badly enough, I somehow found the strength, determination and power to do so.
Losing weight is a doable thing. For everyone. And it something you will never, ever regret doing. Good luck to you and take heart that you too CAN do it.
But you can overcome this. It's going to be hard...I will not lie. I am still struggling. I will admit I haven't gotten the regular exercise thing down the entire time I have been on this journey.
Try with baby steps! You don't have to exercise at first, ord knows I didn't..Just work on gradually changing your diet. Not going back for seconds, skipping the sweets, less cola...Little things Then maybe once you get some of the weight off you can try incorporating exercise!
Know that you are NOT alone. Some people like the baby steps plan, I went for the cold turkey plan...but stop being so hard on yourself to begin with. If losing weight was easy - no one would be fat. Forget about past failures. They are irrelevant. They are in the past.
I know that feeling so well. What finally got me to care and consistently try were books (not blogs and not the computer.) I kept borrowing all of the weight loss and get healthy books from the library. Not books about particular diets, but just about losing weight or getting healthy in general. I held them in my hands (instead of food) and skimmed and read until finally I cared enough to try again. If your library has The Beck Diet Solution I'd start there.
This time will be different for you. For the past 20 years I kept thinking that tomorrow it would be easier to control my eating. That's 7300 times that I told myself that they next day would be easier. It only gets easy after you eat right and cut back for a short while.
Whether you say you can, or you say you can't, you are right.
You CAN do this. Nay... you WILL do this.
Take it easy on yourself. Start fresh. Is there one particular small thing you can do to feel better? Drinking water? Taking a quick walk around a building before entering it? Adding a big serving of vegetables to those meals?
Again, I echo everyone else. The past is rightly in the past. You cannot change it, but you can learn from it. Do you remember why you stopped trying those other times? If you see a pattern, you can plan for it, and catch yourself before it happens You're worth this.
Sometimes, it takes alot of tries before you succeed. I quit smoking 3 or 4 times before I actually quit for good, over two years ago. I tried to lose weight several times over the years, with varying degrees of success, before giving it up and gaining back all I had lost. Last January I decided to improve my eating habits, get more exercise, and to date I have lost 84 pounds, and I have my good days and my bad days, but I am not giving up. If you don't like exercise, such as elleptical machines, can you think of some kind of physical activity you do like? Swimming is good exercise. Some days I follow exercise DVDs and some days I get on the stationary bike, but I like to mix it up to avoid boredom and I am taking up swimming next week (just got my new swimsuit, my first in over 20 years), softball in the Summer and indoor walking now that it's cold.
Another thing..don't worry about what others think. I know that's easier said than done, but my coworkers made fun of me for taking walks around the airport I work in, and for doing kickboxing-step exercises. I got the last laugh, because I'm losing weight, and they're not, or they don't have the guts to change something about themselves they don't like. You have the guts...you're here at 3FC, it's a start. Good luck.
I can really relate to having this fear of failing. I think it sets us back so much more than the actual cravings do. I think sometimes we actually set ourselves up to fail, because it fits with the image we have of how we are. The "I'm fat and a failure" mindset.
I know the precious few times I have felt like a normal, or thin person, I dont go to food for comfort.
In a lot of ways being fat is comfortable. Not because we want to be, but because thats "who we are". Changing the way you see yourself and how you think others see you is not easy. It takes guts!
And to top that off we have to deal with the actual struggle of breaking food addictions and bad behaviours.
Having said all that, I firmly believe that it can be done. I myself have not yet succeeded, but I think that being aware of the fears and the problems will help, so that when you get the negative thoughts you can see them for what they are.
I think one thing to keep in mind is that you dont always have to WANT to do it, you just have to DO it. Ignore the little devil on your shoulder saying that it wont hurt with just one day off plan, or that "you cant really do this you know" and just focus on your plan.
What the heck??
that is all it takes to get started 
. try to walk 5 minutes each day for a week then gradually build it up till you are walking 20-30 minutes.. a day . soon you will be feeling better and you can then start looking at changing parts of your diet. satrt making healthier choices and once you are comfortable with the foods you are eating start calories counting .. you will need around 2000 calories a day to start with so thats not hard to do . I think Calorie couting is the easiest way to keep a check on your diet . i eat well but still have treats as long as they are in my calories for the day 
