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-   -   why do you think you are overweight? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/20-somethings/89393-why-do-you-think-you-overweight.html)

phatgirl 07-17-2006 11:39 AM

why do you think you are overweight?
Do you know the reasons?

I had my BMR tested (amt of calories burned if doing absolutely nothing) and it was 1500. My BMR was about 8 percent below average but I really don't think that's the biggest factor.

I think my biggest factor for weight gain is change in diet since I went to college. I rarely drank pop and ate fast food in high school but then suddenly I was drinking 2 pops a day adn eating at fast food places a couple of nights a week. I'm still doing the same now and I think that's why I'm stuck at this current weight.

Realizing why you are overweight is a good step toward changing it! What do you think the reasons are for you?

luey 07-17-2006 12:06 PM

I know the reason I was overweight - I ate too much and didn't exercise enough!

Ok, seriously... I was always taught to eat all of my food, but never how to take just the right size portion for what I needed. I would pile my plate with food and then be compelled to eat it all, even if that meant feeling sick. I still do that sometimes, but most of the time I'm able to either not take a lot of food, or not eat everything I've taken. I use small plates, take only one spoonful of what I'm offered, and "ruin" the extra food I don't want by mushing it together or pouring water onto it, so I don't want it anymore. It's wasteful and it gets me some strange looks at restaurants, but it's better then being overweight!

I also think I don't need very many calories to power my body. Before I began dieting, I ate easily 2000 calories per day, probably more. When I began dieting, I ate 1600 a day. I found this was more than enough, and cut down even further. Eventually, I settled on 1200 calories per day. This is an extremely low figure, yet I wasn't starving (I would be hungry before each meal, but not terribly so). Even when I was exercising four or five days a week, 1200-1400 calories was the right amount of food. I lost between half a pound and a pound per week, a not unhealthy rate of loss. I was shocked at how little I actually needed to keep me happily moving.

I realize not everyone could or should subsist on such a low caloric intake, but it was right for me. Imagine how much extra, unneeded food I was eating before I cut back on calories!

Stephanie Osborne 07-17-2006 12:20 PM

I think I have an unhealthy relationship with food. I often link eating with going out with friends, having a night out with my husband...rewards for a job well done etc...I also cannot cook so I have gotten so used to eating out (which is almost never good for you). Although my weight does not necessarily point to me being 'overweight' per say I just do not feel comfortable in my body. I have a very tiny frame and put on quite a bit of weight quickly on college. As I lose it I am starting to feel more like myself again.

NakedHousewife 07-17-2006 12:56 PM

I carried the famous "clean your plate" syndrome from my mom. I moved in with my grandmother in high school and we ate pretty healthy food. Small portions, very few snacks, no pop. It became second-nature to me, so I don't think that's my issue. I eat very well. I occasionally indulge in crap, but I love vegetables and rarely have a meal without fruit or veggies in or with it. One cause is definitely genetic. The women in my family have a very curvy bone structure and a tendency to put on weight easily. My grandmother who is an aerobics instructor eats like a bird and is very health conscious, but still puts on weight quickly when she has an injury and isn't as active for a few days. I have always known this about my family, so it's been something I've always had to pay attention to in myself. Mostly, I'm just not very physically active. I'm a homebody, I like being in the house, in the air conditioning, not a fan of sports, a big wuss when it comes to exerting myself. (sweat? ew!!) That is the biggest factor. I'm lazy.

lilybelle 07-17-2006 01:08 PM

I used to drink 6 mountain dew's a day, over-eat to the point of being stuffed and didn't get any exercise. I was sick and my poor diet only added to my sickness. I take prednisone which does make a body hungrier, but I plain just got depressed and thought I might as well eat all I could possibly want. I also think the men troubles that I have had, contributed to the depression and the over-eating.

AngelxxRose 07-17-2006 01:16 PM

I am overweight because I eat too much. I love food and I have to always be aware of how much I am eating or I will go overboard. Luckily I enjoy working out. I will always have to eat less than I would like to be at a healthy weight.

buckettgirl 07-17-2006 01:28 PM

Food was the only companion I had.
Food comforted me when my parents wouldn't.
Food was there when all the skinny kids were cruel to me.
Food numbed me to all the emotional pain.
Food was a way to celebrate and reward all the things in life.
Food is how Grandma shows love.
Food filled a void in my soul.

This is why I eventually ended up at 352lbs.

shrinkingchica 07-17-2006 01:47 PM

How do you have your BMR tested???? I know about the websites, but I want to have MY individual number.

WastedThermos 07-17-2006 03:15 PM

I think from a very young age I've had a very unhealthy relationship with food. I was one of those people who would stuff themselves to the point of being uncomfortable at every meal.
-Binging nearly everyday.
-Never taking the time to realize that I was trying to cover up feeling lonely or inadequate with food.
-Developing disordered eating at a young age.
-Keeping food a secret.
-Having a pretty inactive childhood/teenage life.
-Drinking at a young age pretty consistently through the time I came to college and never really considering how that added to my obesity.
-Never eating any vegetables or whole grains.
-Having the all-or-nothing mind set where if I messed up one meal, I figured the rest of the day was shot too so I may as well just go ahead and eat whatever I wanted so I could start again the next day.
-Associating overeating with family/friend time.
-Chosing to be ignorant about the amounts of CRAPPY food I was putting into my body.

Um.. I could probably go on forever. I still struggle with these things, but I try not to let them define me. I'm learning to say that's who I USED to be, but that is not who I AM.

junebug41 07-17-2006 03:29 PM

It was comforting, it tasted good and it occupied me. I love food. I also never ever ever gave any thought to the effects of what and how much I was putting in my mouth. I ate without a care in the world.

kateful 07-17-2006 03:41 PM


I grew up in a rural community 30 miles from the nearest grocery store. My mom went grocery shopping every two weeks. She bought some snacks which were reserved primarily for my dad (and often my brother who helped my dad on the farm and was the only boy child). When it came down the last treat, it wasn't mine. Ever. I started sneaking food fairly early in life. I've been trying ever since to exert my authority and have whatever I want because I can.

Someday I'll get over that.

sotypical 07-17-2006 03:46 PM

All thru high school I was always over weight. Well ever since I was little but of course I don't remember back to being 6 and over weight and why I was but in more recent years there are a few reason:

what I eat and how much I ate
I was always told to eat everything on my plate
our whole family is over weight
eating because I was bored
too many snacks

I became over-weight when my boyfriend and I started dating and going out for dinner every-night.

I still eat everything on my plate (that's a hard one to break - I hate wasting food) but I do try and put LESS on my plate. I also try and eat much more veggies then I was. I have kicked the bordem eating. I allow myself 3 meals and usually two snacks, if I am hungry any other time (or my body thinks I am hungry) I usually ingore it - unless I am staying up later then normal and I really am hungry.

spillthebeans 07-17-2006 04:02 PM

just reading some of these posts got me thinking about my childhood, and how early on my mind was molded about food...

We were really poor, single parent, feeding three kids. We didnt' always have food, so now, I can afford food, and it makes me want to eat everything, just because it's there.

I notice on days that I go grocery shopping I eat tons.
I'll go from a bowl of cereal, to sandwiches, to whatever...I eat almost a little of everything that I bought, that same day! It's insane really.

I can't believe I just typed this for all to see, but I do feel like that has a lot to do with my food issue.

Food makes me happy.

Infrogwetrust 07-17-2006 08:52 PM

A Haiku for you:

I wish to be thin.
To the gym today I think.
MMMM....chocolate cake!

That was fun...I think I will start a thread.

Flying Betty 07-17-2006 10:48 PM

I have a major sweet tooth and eomotional eating issues which I have *almost* conquered. I also have a fairly hefty frame and put on weight easily. I also took a lot of dance classes my entire life and studio dance is an environment where being very thin is the ideal/norm. Between that and going to a very body image conscious college I sort of got the impression that I couldn't be attractive unless I was skinny and I'm not built to be skinny, so it was a case of "I can't be like that so I'm not even going to try" which is how I gained 50 pounds in college after having lost it once in high school.

Cheercoach 07-18-2006 11:33 AM

Clean Plate Club here!:wave: I truly think that it programmed me from the time I was a small child to not pay attention to when I was full, but when I was finished with my plate. That and lack of physical activities....

Oh yes, and genetics...wonderful genetics....


BellaLucia 07-19-2006 01:11 PM

I am addicted to food. If I could eat all the food in the world, I'd finish it all in a day. My addiction started when my father molested me. The ******* refuses to take responsibility for it. I still have nightmates.

srmb60 07-20-2006 09:11 AM

I was overweight because I ate too much and sat too much :)

But the real reason I stopped by this thread was about the BMR. Through trial and error and years of practice .... I've come to know that mine is between 1250 and 1300 cals. Now keep in mind that I'm short, fine boned and have no hips. But 1500 cals is a perfectly workable number. A 1500 cal food plan, a little walking and 20 minutes of weights a couple times a week should lead you to a very nice tidy weightloss. In fact if you worked out some everyday, you could afford a higher calorie food plan.

Allycatisfat 07-20-2006 10:52 AM

Over eating
And stress

My family is predisposed to heaviness in the female side. I tend to binge eat a lot on sugars and carbs, especially when I am stressed out or worse, bored, or depressed. I don't excersise right now either and shame on me. Working out is hard because I can't do anything truly aerobic because my left hip is ruined. I'm doing belly dance because it's very low impact and I will start walking at least 20 minutes a day.

later Chicks,


ktruley 07-21-2006 01:07 AM

I totally wish I had an answer for this one...
Sure, I could say it's because of my addiction to Taco Bell... but I can't blame it on that. And I could say it's because I was taught to clean my plate, but I really dont remember that. And I could say that it's because I was/am inactive.. but I know that's not it either.

I don't know why I'm overweight. :?: I've always been active and I'm a huge fruit and vegetables fan, as well as the whole grains and such. Not a big meat eater, not really into the junk foods and snacks and things. I just don't get it.

I played tennis and soccer in high school, along with tap dancing for musicals and just in general running around craziness, but still the weight holds. I'm trying though, really trying to be more active and to watch what I eat, but I don't want to become obsessed again... I went that route before: binge/purge or starve/exercise a lot or counting calories/journal of what I ate. It's all bad for me. I just have to stay busy or something... but I really, really wish I knew why I'm this heavy. *sigh* :(

healthyme05 07-21-2006 02:11 AM

College happened!
It started in 2001 when I started school...all of the late nights, snacking, calorie dense cafeteria food (buffet style), and the emotional stress of being 6 hours away from home all by myself was enough to do it. So really, the college environment, stress, loneliness, and not knowing about how to eat well did it for me.

amykay9377 07-21-2006 12:28 PM

In my house growing up, we were all 'bigger' but not necessarily obese or majorly overweight. Double chins and 'padding' were the norm. In fact, when I first met my would-be husband, he was terribly skinny (6 ft tall and only 130 lbs) and I joked when I hugged him that I felt I could break him in half, he felt so thin to me. I had never hugged someone so thin. Well, he fattened up just like me, sadly. He doesn't care, but I am hoping that if I get svelte and hot, he will want to do the same.

In my house, my father would spank us with a belt (or at least threaten to) if we didn't eat our veggies. There were many nights I would still be at the table staring at cold peas-n-carrots at 10 at night, trying to force my self to eat them and to avoid the belt. It rarely worked. Because of that, I cannot PHYSICALLY bring myself to eat any veggie other than taters or tomato sauce. I will be physically ill if I put anything else in my mouth. That's one big reason I don't eat right.

Another is like many have said above--
Food = Love. Food = Belonging. Food = Reward.

Growing up, and as a grown up, if I was sad, mad, lonely, bored, food was there. If I did good at school, if I did something great at work, I would reward myself with ice cream or cupcakes.

When I was sitting down a week or so ago to take a good hard look at myself and set positive, mini-goals and the Ultimate Goal Weight, I was thinking, 'how can I reward myself for making each mini-goal?' and my first thought was always FOOD. I had to sit for a good 5 minutes to think of 3 NON-FOOD-RELATED rewards for myself, for each goal, that in no way,shape or form, included food. I have promised myself a new bathing suit, a new pair of shoes, and a slinky dress for the goals (1 for each goal, of course). Now granted, the new bathing suit is for a company BBQ Picnic at a local springs, but still...

Lastly, I will admit it flat out. I love to eat and I don't like to MOVE. I could be content to sit on the couch all weekend with a book, the TV and a pile of junk food. It's as simple as that.

In FL, it is too hot to go outside for probably 8 months out of the year. It's humid, it's nasty, and I don't like it. I have to force myself to go out when my daughter (8) wants to go to the park. Inside, there is comfy couches and air conditioning. I'm lazy and I need to change my ways.

Okay, there I said it. I don't think I've ever said ALL of this out loud before (and I guess I'm really not now either!) and it feels good to admit all of this stuff.

My first goal is to be under 190 to get that bathing suit! Cross your fingers!

biosci02 07-21-2006 09:45 PM

Simple.....i don't eat the way I should. Once I learn how to correct that problem, the weight will come off.....

bida 07-22-2006 02:47 AM

or why haven't I lost the weight even though I have known for years I am overweight?

Prob this is the easiest thing in my life to be lazy about because it is the easiest thing to overlook - what goes in your mouth - you may think - but we think about it - but how hard is it to really think about all the cals/fat/carbs we eat in a day and add it up - its tough - and strict and well. I guess i'm lazy. doesn't seem to matter enough that it affects other aspects of my life - but hopefully now I am realizing that. I am becoming more strict - more disiplined and more aware - but it is still a challenge.

I like food - I just have to remember that food will always be there - no mater where I am.

oh yeah - but I'm afraid of being hungry I realize - I don't quite know why - but I think it has something to do with when I was a kid (back down the path) my parents used to leave me at a babysitters 5 days a week, and usually didn't come home till late - so I would have dinner with the babysitter and her husband and family and then dinner with my parents. I may not have eaten so much - but it def added on the calories. I guess it was my way of fitting in to two families? I didn't want to be lonely - so I guess maybe feeling hungry is in a sense a real feeling of lonliness? I don't know - this is something I have been thinking about lately - seem feasable? or just psyco-bable? haha!

ok time for bed - too much work these past 4 days! seems like my life has gone by in 4 days - so much work!


bida 07-22-2006 02:47 AM

oh yeah - and my mom is big too :)

Jessie_777 07-22-2006 11:55 PM

I eat when I'm happy, I eat when I'm upset, I eat when I'm bored. I'm an emotional eater. I suppose it gives me some sort of control in my life...I get to control how, where, what and when I eat. Growing up too my dad always had sweets and there my sweet tooth was born :D In middle school and part of high school I walked everywhere. To and from school and then to friends houses, which from there we'd walk somewhere else. And then people got their licenses and I never had to walk again. It caught up with me, but my eating habits didn't change. One of my earliest memories of over eating was when I was maybe 9 or so and things were kinda of rough and stressful around my house. I made myself a pb&j sandwhich and when I finished I made another, and then another, I honestly am not sure how many I made. I notice when something is bothering me I head for the kitchen. But yeah, now I'm walking 5 days a week and that's a start ;)

NewDay4MeToo 07-23-2006 02:18 AM

My reasons

This seemed like a great place to put a first post.

I never really developed the good habits necessary to be thin. Most of my growing up years I was just a little chubby. I was active enough as a 17 year old to get down to what is now my goal weight- 135. I kept that for about a year and a half.

But after that I just kept on eating. And eating loads of crap. I am so addicted to the really high calorie, high fat foods. Fast food was my friend for way too long, and I still have to work on that one. And the liquid calories killed me... I LOVE Coke. Cherry Coke.

So, to combat those things, I am trying really hard to actually eat fruits and veggies. And the only Coke I have these days is Diet.

I have never consistently drunk enough water. So I am working on that.

Finally, I tend to be lazy. I don't have active hobbies that I enjoy. So I am trying to find things, and making myself go biking because I do like that once I get going.

alsten02 07-23-2006 10:53 AM

me it was a combination of things.

I was definitely an emotional eater. Especially with my bad anxiety, I would shove anything down that was around. .. I have pcos too which can make it harder to stay at a healthier weight if your not really working at it.
I lost 50 lbs when I was here at this site... but again I let my anxiety get the best of me & ended gaining it all back.
I need to quit using food as my support or distraction.

So Im finally trying again. :)

tobetheman 07-23-2006 11:22 AM

I think I'm really overweight cause I at for pleasure, then it turned to eating for comfort, and then it became about eating for comfort and a little about rebellion. At that time this was my way. Now, I rebel in much more productive ways and only if its to my benefit. AS for the comfort part, I find that just facing the reality esp. the health risk are enough to make me ask why do I want to eat this to comfort myself. I have really not had those times, now, where I have an huge urge to eat something that I know may make me want to quit my plan anymore, like in my past attempts because of this reality. I stop myself from reaching this point in the first place by not eating that trigger food. I know I will probably eat it though, but I am kinda setting my mind in check now so I am prepared, but not to the point of setting myself up to actually undertake that road. It can get hard to explain at times I guess, but I see it as putting up roadblocks that can't be broken through with some things and alternate roads that could be taken but that I must decide not to take with other things. Heck I'm also building new roads too, and these things are turning into awesome freeways!

MOMnMO 07-23-2006 02:22 PM

Great responses here. I could relate with many of the comments. Food has always been a control issue for me. Use to NOT eat due to a "difficult" home environment. It seemed the one thing I could control. Then I worked through those issues and food was pleasure, stress relief... fun. Had two kids, metabolism changed and food effected me differently. Now I'm learning that food can still be fun and pleasurable in moderation.

MadamePJ 07-24-2006 07:43 PM

Why am I overweight ??
My life long love of greasy foods and or sweets .... and my hate relationship of working out and breaking up a sweat ... I hope to one day ... learn to enjoy working out ... hmmmmmmmmm :^:

Stevi-rocks 07-24-2006 07:52 PM

I honestloy didn't realize that I was different than those around me. I wasn't (usually) eating any more, Qty or frequency) than anybody else around me. Fast food was a staple of our existance. Sugary foods are always available. I think overall my lack of knowledge/information is a huge factor. Who knew we where all over eating all the time....only I was showing it all over me.

DeafinlySmart 07-24-2006 09:01 PM

I kept getting pregnant, then eating for 2 or 3 (you only need to eat for 1.5). Then afterwards I kept the same cravings and overeating habits. It would take me 2-3 years after each to decide I didn't need to do that anymore. Then when I'm almost there, I would get pregnant again. I've had 3 kids now my husband is FIXED so this one I want to be for GOOD.

shrinkingchica 07-25-2006 02:16 PM

I am/was overweight mainly due to a childhood plauged by major depression.

miss michelle 07-25-2006 07:54 PM

Oh, man. Reasons why I became overweight and reasons why I still battle food (because in my head I still have a problem):
-- Eating because I'm bored (still happens A TON but at least I'm aware of it)
-- Overeating (happens much less frequently than it used to)
-- Eating lots of sweets (I truly love sweet foods)
-- Eating big portions of high cal foods but not getting enough exercise (my brothers used to eat the same food as me and are skinny as rails)
-- Dorm food (no explanation needed)
-- Binge eating while bored, watching tv, when I'm alone (which leads me to still feel guilty about eating ice cream in front of people. last night i hid my skinny cow from my roomate. she's a size 4 and thinks i'm thinner than her. weird that our minds never change)

csoar2004 07-25-2006 09:40 PM


why do you think you are overweight?
I was perimenopausal (Think: tanked metabolism :mad: ) and still eating as though I was cycling 5000 miles per season. :o NOT a good combo! Lucky for me I found Fat Flush. :carrot:

IRWShonna 07-25-2006 09:51 PM

I have struggled with weight all my life... I was either too small due to eating disorders or on to my current state - too big..
I have a major sweet tooth and am comforted by foods. I also have a hefty frame and put on weight easily - I need look at something sweet and I balloon to another 5 punds bigger!
I have had 2 children and the last one was a C-section - parts of my stomache are still numb - So I'm sure that doesn't help in the weight loss process either.
I often fix meals on the go as we are a busy family - and am not always prepared to plan meals. <which I know is a much healthier way>
I over eat, and don't exercise much... Gee the more I think about this I could write down a hundred reasons - all of witch I am informed of.. :(

warcry111 07-26-2006 03:53 AM

I guess my own childhood solution to use foods as a solution to ease my pain and depression as a result of overcritical parents and a truly evil grandma and ****ed up classmates. Eventually it got out of control and my problems escalated in every dimension. I remember back when I was a child and pre-teen there were only a few times I ever went to the "overweight" section and it was borderline overweight-normal BMI; most of the time I think I was really in the upper range of a normal BMI but my overcritical mom was never satisfied with my looks. As soon as more and more problems came to me during my teenage years, including my depression and social anxiety, there were times where I completely relied on food to ease my pain and I ate foods that were considered "forbidden" by my mom. Later I relied on smoking tobacco (cigarettes/cigars) and sometimes marijuana (in blunts - they make you feel hungry as well) in addition as "self-help" tools to ease my anxiety/depression. At my highest weight, I was borderline obese.

Canadian_Mickey 07-26-2006 11:02 AM

Why?? Lots of reasons.....

1) In Bed for over a year, because of illness, not active
2) 9 High powered medications that I took for over 2 yrs
3) Emotional eater
4) After I got married my eating habits changed, as well as WHAT I ate, and How Much!
5) Started eating Rich Foods, that I didn't eat growing up.
6) Big portions - Still struggle with that
7) Ate when I was Bored or in front of TV.... BAD IDEA!
8) Ate Convience foods, cause I hated to Cook....still hate to cook, but I'm learning slowly.
9) Made bad food choices.

drake3272004 07-27-2006 11:13 PM

Since having my daughter, seven years ago, I had been 10-30 lbs heavier---just couldn't seem to lose the rest of the weight. Then a few years ago I started having major problems with ganglion cysts in BOTH of my wrists---I've dealt with having them in my right wrist since I was 18, but to have one in both of my wrists at the same time really affected what I could do physically. They can be very painful! I eventually had surgery on my right wrist and that helped some. Then I developed tendonitis in both my hands and lower arms, my arms and hands hurt all the time! I even had to wear braces on my wrists when I slept because I would be in so much pain the next day or wake in the middle of the night because of pain or my hands or arms had "fallen asleep" and the tingling of blood flowing back into my limbs would wake me.
I've just kinda spiraled out of control since then, I started to just give up on exercise because I always seemed to end up in pain. But I wasn't taking into account what I was eating and adjusting my eating habits to my new inactive lifestyle. In fact, I think I started to eat more and add to my depression.:( To add to the drama, I've also found out in the last year that I have endometrial hyperplasia. I'm thinking that the extra weight and birth control pills might be the culprits!
Now that I have changed jobs and have really been able to manage my tendonitis, I am starting to be more active.........just need to find the time now! I added two more children to my family by getting married again and it's tough to find time!:dizzy:

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