I binged...
 

The other day...I ate 4,066 calories. WOW! Ya'll are the first to know the actual number, I couldnt bring myself to tell anyone that I know. I didnt really eat anything bad, but just a lot of "good stuff." I am however glad there was nothing "bad" in the house because the number would probably be higher.

What happend you ask? One of my good friends just told me that her mother has less than a year to live because she has brain cancer. I ate. I cannot find another friend. He is one of my best friends and he has disappeared...this is not good because he had SERIOUS self esteem issues, depression and just to put the FRICKIN' cherry on top...an abusive and controlling boyfriend...and now I cant find him...so I ate and ate.

I tried to get back on track yesterday, but not as "on track" as I need to be. MAN! I wish I didnt mess up that bad, but I know I look to food for comfort when there is no one I can really talk to. (I found all of this out around midnight and many of my friends are on the east coast so it was 3am there and my mother was asleep) and the other ones I would talk to were the ones in trouble. LOL, maybe I could deveop an addiction to doing crunches or squats duing times of trial...that would be more productive.

Oh to be addicted to working out! Wouldn't that be kinda nice!

I hope that you don't feel too bad and I hope that you aren't too hard on yourself! Sometimes I end up being so hard on myself that ends up giving me an excuse to do it again. You are doing very well! And it was a great thing to post it here and hold yourself accountable for it. There's always going to be little set backs, but the fact that you've already got it in check is a great thing. Keep your head up. If you keep holding on, you will eventually be able to deal with stuff in a different way (hopefully positive).

I agree w/ Stephanie whole-heartedly. I just want to add that when bad things happen, don't blame yourself and don't abuse your body by filling it with food. If you're eating out of anxiety, fear, loneliness, anger, etc., then find something healthy to do in those times. Go for a walk, read a book, watch a movie, post on 3fc, write in a journal...anything to take your mind off of your problems. I used to do this, too, but one day I had enough of my situation and so I changed my lifestyle....and every day that I eat healthy and exercise I can feel myself getting stronger both mentally and physically. By not stuffing my face with food to smother my emotions, I can actually experience life to the fullest, and that makes me very happy.

It's OK to slip up every once in a while. It happens to the best of us. I'm proud of you for getting back on track....keep on going. You know what you have to do so continue to do it! We are all in the same boat, so you're not alone.

Big :hug: to you.

Thank you ladies for your support and enouragement.

That's a really tough situation--don't beat yourself up about eating so much. You know what the trigger was and you counted the calories, so it's not as bad as it seems. Hang in there.

Wow. I understand why you binged. would have done the same thing. In fact I did. I binged saturday night. I went out to dinner and had a huge sandwhich, then driving home (at 2am) I had half a box of chocolate. I have no idea why. I was exasuted and was going home to sleep, but instead I binged in the middle of the night for no reason. anyway..sorry, I am talking about myself too much. Just try and get back on track and mabye excercise will make you feel better and help you deal with the stress.

I am really impressed that you figured the actual number out!! I know that when I have binged in the past I have been to much of a puss to figure out how many calories I took in. I just run and hide from it.
You really took responsibility - good job!