Here's something that I have been thinking about alot. What if, when (notice I say WHEN ) I get to my goal weight, I don't know how to be skinny? Or rather, I don't know how to not be fat. I mean, I know that this will be a gradual process and that I will adjust as my weight goes down but I have been overweight for most of my life and it is somewhat of an obsession to be thinner. I don't know that obsession is the right word but being fat has always been a part of me. Tugging at my clothes to make sure nothing is hanging out, trying not to have a double chin in pictures, hating to shop, knowing it is not even an option to wear a bathing suit to the beach. I could go on and on. Will I be able to let all of that go? I'm really starting to worry that once I lose the weight, what will I be like? And will I like the new me? HELP!! I'm really starting to freak out! Maybe I'm just being stupid

Leanne, you will always be the same person, no matter how much you weigh! You will definitely have to adjust to your new body, but if you lose the weight at a healthy pace, it should give you plenty of time to get used to it. I've heard that people who lose a lot of weight really really fast (like after weight loss surgery and stuff like that) have trouble adjusting, but I think that is not as much of a problem if you lose it slowly.

I'm sure it will work out okay!

hello, i too have been strugglin since i was alittle girl, im 21 now and still overweight, i have tried eery diet there is and found that weight watchers is the only one helpin me control my food intake. There was one point in time were i was takin the ephedra pills and lost all the weight. I was so excited but i had no idea how to be skinny, i still felt self conscious bout my body and people were than tellin me i looked to skinny that i should gain some weight, i guess i jus lost the weight in the wrong places. I was boney. but after that i gained n lost for yrs. I weigh now 225, n loosing, all you have to do is build your confidence level higher and acting as if you were skinny for yrs will come naturally with every step. I cant wait till i can wear a bikini again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[link=http://www.3fatchicks.com/weight-tracker/index.php] [image noborder]http://www.3fatchicks.com/weight-tracker/img/bar-leopard/bear01/lb/230/150/225/.png[/image][/link]

I found it took my mind a lot longer to comes to terms with being a lot smaller than i used to be than for my body to actually get there. It was really really weird for a long time. I think the most hurtful and certainly the thing that woke me up the most was when I saw my sister trying to get into a top i'd just bought (my sister and I used to be the same size) and it was about 6 sizes too small for her and out of complete habit I just yelled at her as I normally would have. "Hey you, you'll stretch it!"

Thats how we usually would have joked around with each other...but she took it extremely badly and we didnt talk for 6 months. It was stupid, callous and thoughtless of me to say it, but at the time I still saw/thought of myself as the same size i always used to be.

Livi

I'm having trouble adjusting. Like I still feel fat inside (I'm US size 10), I still feel like same old same old fat old Jen. It irritates me when men lear at me too, thinking, what the heck are they looking at?

At my kickboxing grading, I was given a huge 240cm long belt (it's supposed to wrap around twice) and I was thinking, " yeah give the fat girl a long one..." when I should've been chuffed to get it at all, cos at my heaviest I wouldn't have been able to last 5 minutes into the class!

It's really strange going clothes shopping. I was looking for my size and they didn;t have the next size up, so I was praying and praying that the trousers I'd picked were cut large! I needn't have worried, they fit perfectly, but I still think I'm a US14 or 16!

I also worry the other way, like when I'm a US 6 or 8, and I wear a bikini to the beach, what will people be thinking, there goes fat Jen in a bikini YUCK!

leannealise,

Maybe it's time to re-evaluate why you're on this weight loss journey. Instead of losing weight just to be "skinny", you should lose weight to be healthy. I know that's easier said than done, because I feel the same way you do and am only now learning how to re-adjust my attitude. In the past when I've lost weight (current weight now) I would plateau, then give up because I was frustrated I couldn't get any lighter. To this day, I still haven't been under 135 lbs. But this time around, I realized instead of being fed up with dieting because the scale won't budge, I'm going to be happy that I've come this far. Sure people have noticed my weight loss and I get compliments, but when I look in the mirror, I still see so much work that needs to be done. But I'm also learning to accept the fact that I worked HARD to get my body in better shape and heart and lungs and everything else healthier! Remember you're doing this for yourself and not anyone else!

I know what you mean. Ihave always been fat. it gives you lots of excuses. There is a link in the library section of this forum to an article in I think the NY times. It is about how people who had weightloss surgery had trouble dealing with the change. I think it is true to of people who lose through dieting. the smallest I have ever been was size14 when I was 18 I lost a lot of weigh and went away to college and gained it all back and a lot more. I am commiting to my self this time to get it off but who knows how I will feel. hopefully good. hopefully good enough to keep it off.

I know what you mean about being obsessed. I spend a lot of time reading and researching on weight loss. Probably why I think heavy people or ince heavy people are the best experts on this stuff. What am I going to do when I don't need to spend my time doing that anymore.

Maybe you should consider a hobby, or new "obsession" that makes you feel good about your thinnner healthier body and also can take up some of your attention.

hehe... I am still trying to get use to being fat! I have always been skinny in my head and I am APPAULED at myself when I see pictures of how large I really am. It scares me to see pictures of myself cause in my head I do not look like that. Maybe my way of thinking will help you girls! Picture a skinny you in your head and project that image through your personality! I think that is why people are very suprised when they find out how much I actually weigh, becaue I do not carry myself as an overweight 27 year old.

Think skinny! Picture yourself thin! and Aim for it ladies!

Jill-
I totally know what that lady is talking about. I still get anxiety everytime I get on the plane and have to put my seat belt on. I hated having to stretch out the seat belt as big as it goes in front of the person next to me. I forget I don't have to do that anymore. Another one is going through the little things to enter an arena or six flags, not sure what they are called. I used to think I was going to get stuck and still sometimes think I'm going to. I can't wait for the day that these fears no longer pop in my head.

Thanks for the responses ladies. I' m glad to know that I am not the only one feeling like this. I'm hoping that my perception of myself will change right along with my body. Thanks again, I really appreciate all of your help!!

Frances Kuffel wrote a memoir about this called Passing for Thin: Losing Half My Weight and Finding My Self. It was decent.

I've been at around the same weight for a few years now and I still have no concept of what I really look like. My little sister is a size 2 or 4 and I feel like she is tiny and I am at least twice her size, but I wear a 6 which is reality is not that much bigger. I had the shock of my life when I realized that I fit into her looser clothes because in my mind she is skinny and I am a giant blob (part of it is related to her being 10 years younger than me - she has always been way smaller than me because I was fully grown when she was still a child).

I was skinny until mid way through college and I didn't realize how heavy I had become until I saw some unfortunate pictures. Now that I've lost most of the weight and kept it off for a few years, I can't shake the heavier self image. I don't know how to fix the image in my head because when I look at the clothes in my closet, I know that I am not overweight but I still feel like I am.

I can't stand to look at pictures of myself....I can't believe just how much bigger I've gotten. Yet on the same line I never have been very slim. I was always bigger than my friends...I look back now and it really wasn't by much. I've always had the fat chick way of thinking. The last 3 years though is when I really put on the pounds and my mind hasn't totally caught up with that....I think I'm still looking like I did when I moved here, which must be why I hate my pictures lol I guess you could say I'm stuck in the middle or something. But I always wonder if I'm going to know how to act when I lose this weight....