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Old 05-11-2016, 11:34 PM   #76  
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Sounds like she takes her job very seriously and didn't take kindly to your fiancé finding the questions funny.Can you appeal and get someone else?

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Hey ladies.

Well the green card interview did not go so well. I've already ranted about it on multiple platforms (friends, family, immigration forum!) so I'll try and keep it brief. Basically the woman we got was not friendly which really threw us off. BF also snickered at one of the ridiculous questions they asked me ("were you ever a member of the communist party?" for example) and she stopped and said "what's so funny?" He immediately apologised but I think we never recovered. She seemed skeptical of the evidence I brought, for example I brought in a bank statement for our joint account and she said "you only brought one?" The idea of the evidence is to prove we're a genuine couple who have assets in both of our names. We mentioned we were moving to Georgia and she asked about the lease and made me feel bad that we didn't bring a copy even though BF hadn't finished signing it!
At the end she said "if I feel comfortable approving you then you'll hear in 1-2 months." First of all the if I feel comfortable line really rubbed me the wrong way. We've been together 6 years and known each other for 14 years, the evidence was all in front of her if she looked harder! Jeez. Secondly 1-2 months?! I've heard of people being approved on the spot and walked away with a notification that their green card is being processed! Sounds like she just didn't like us, maybe the BF's comment really got her back up and she's decided to put our application to the bottom of her pile.

I really wanted this to all be over but now I might have to wait months to hear; it's infuriating. She kept making a point of making sure mail would be ok going to our current address "in case I need more evidence". Ugh. She just didn't seem positive that she was going to approve us and kept making it seem like she wanted to see more evidence. We had joint bank accounts, health insurance, car insurance, tax returns, photos and a flight itinerary of a trip we took. Our drivers licences both had the same address on too. Can't believe people who have known each other for a fraction of the time we have walked away with an approval while we're left hanging over one woman's power trip.

Anyway. Needless to say I was off today. Had a Subway, soda, cookies..just general emotional eating. I'm going to try and move on with life the best I can but today sucked.
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Old 05-12-2016, 04:56 AM   #77  
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I've been having a lot of stress lately. School will be over in one week and hopefully it'll be better after that. Stress is my biggest diet killer, I haven't been eating well in the last few days...

Rie, Agh, I totally hear you! I've been in France for two years and been putting up with their weird and arbitrary visa policies.
In theory, we only need to go once a year for 3-4 years, and in the end we can apply for a longer visa which lasts 10 years (there's no equivalent to a green card in France). But in reality, I've been going there every 3 months (4 if I'm lucky) and often coming home empty-handed... And ugh. It can be so nerve-wrecking.
We're a legit couple too and I was optimistic in the beginning, thinking there would be no reason for it not to work. We have enough proof, after all. But depending on the person we stumble upon, it's never enough.
Arbitrary jerks that delay your process exist everywhere. Try to be patient, take a deep breath and remind yourself that you have the right to be there after all. It'll come around.
Best of luck though, I hope she does "feel comfortable" (ugh) and it works out on the first time for you!
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Old 05-12-2016, 02:11 PM   #78  
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Quick update: WE GOT APPROVED! Turns out the lady just wanted to make us nervous, we were approved today! So, SO relieved! Thank you for your kind words and well wishes everyone
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Old 05-14-2016, 12:16 AM   #79  
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*burp* guys...I am not looking after myself properly leading up to this move! It has to stop! I'm gonna be in the 170's at this rate.

I've been eating fast food, going out to meals, drinking soda, eating snacks...the works. All justified in my head because of the move i.e. "I won't get to eat this for a long time!" or even "I'll start eating clean in Atlanta!" But that's not the right way to go about this!!

Tonight I had BBQ...3 huge sausages with BBQ beans and sweet potato tots. So good, but so bad!

I HAVE been exercising the last couple of days, which does NOT pardon my poor eating habits but at least I've been moving. I did a dance class yesterday and a barre class today. Oh man, I sucked in barre today, the instructor at the end asked me how the class was and I said "HARD! I just did a 10K so I guess my legs haven't recovered" and she said "oh yeah, I thought that you usually do much better, I knew something was up!" My legs were shaking constantly.

I'm in the process of making my first meal plan for the week after I move into my new place! I figured the first few days are gonna be crazy so we'll probably just grab something to eat out and about, but starting the following Monday I'm going to eat on plan . I'm trying to go back to my method of trying to get the right amount of protein, veg and limit how many servings of grains I have too (my biggest problem area). I forgot how challenging it is meal planning this way! It's very intensive since I plan ALL my meals, but I know I need this level of structure or I'll start to wander off and eat something unhealthy.

-----------------------------------

anity - That sounds so frustrating! Thanks for your support, thankfully she was just trying to make us sweat. So what's the story with you and your partner, where are you from originally?
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Old 05-14-2016, 07:21 PM   #80  
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A little rushed towards the end, but an interesting read on why dieting can cause weight gain in the long term: http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/08/op...diet.html?_r=0

"In people, dieting also reduces the influence of the brain’s weight-regulation system by teaching us to rely on rules rather than hunger to control eating. People who eat this way become more vulnerable to external cues telling them what to eat. In the modern environment, many of those cues were invented by marketers to make us eat more, like advertising, supersizing and the all-you-can-eat buffet. Studies show that long-term dieters are more likely to eat for emotional reasons or simply because food is available. When dieters who have long ignored their hunger finally exhaust their willpower, they tend to overeat for all these reasons, leading to weight gain."
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Old 05-15-2016, 06:52 AM   #81  
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So this coming week I won't be weighing in.i leave for vacation Tuesday and won't be back until Monday
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Old 05-15-2016, 06:59 AM   #82  
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A little rushed towards the end, but an interesting read on why dieting can cause weight gain in the long term: http://www.nytimes.com/2016/05/08/op...diet.html?_r=0

"In people, dieting also reduces the influence of the brain’s weight-regulation system by teaching us to rely on rules rather than hunger to control eating. People who eat this way become more vulnerable to external cues telling them what to eat. In the modern environment, many of those cues were invented by marketers to make us eat more, like advertising, supersizing and the all-you-can-eat buffet. Studies show that long-term dieters are more likely to eat for emotional reasons or simply because food is available. When dieters who have long ignored their hunger finally exhaust their willpower, they tend to overeat for all these reasons, leading to weight gain."
This article is complete hogwash.To tell people to eat when hungry and stop when full isn't going to have them lose any weight.The biggest loser people aren't a good example due to the crazy and unrealistic way they lose the weight.The author only went on a few crash diets and never actually tried changing her lifestyle.
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Old 05-15-2016, 11:22 AM   #83  
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This article is complete hogwash.To tell people to eat when hungry and stop when full isn't going to have them lose any weight.The biggest loser people aren't a good example due to the crazy and unrealistic way they lose the weight.The author only went on a few crash diets and never actually tried changing her lifestyle.
I don't think the article was there to give advice but rather inform on the psychology behind diets and why a lot of people lose/regain after dieting. Her own advice at the end was completely out of place, I admit, but I believe the research she presents could be of value to some people.
I see a lot of people diet, lose loads of weight and then return to 3FC having regained it all. Dieting does something to the mindset that makes a lot of people want to eat more. The theory behind a metabolic set point was interesting to me, plus the theory behind stress caused by dieting can be a catalyst to weight gain. I've experienced similar symptoms when dieting.

I actually do think that mindful eating would help people lose weight, to argue against your point. It's definitely not as simple, but I believe in western society we really chow down on food at an alarming rate. When living in Japan my Japanese friends were shocked to see how fast I ate. I read a book called "The Japan diet" where I took away the lesson to eat slowly. It tries to teach the reader to eat a bite of food, but down the utensils, sit, chew, perhaps take a sip of water and add to table conversation, then begin again. When I practiced this method I was shocked at how full I felt so early in the meal, sometimes I'd eat less than half a meal before stopping. The Japanese also focus on vegetables and fish being the main event on their table, while grains are a side dish. Personally I'll take advice from the people who have the lowest obesity rate in the world and the longest life expectancy in the world over someone trying to sell me a diet plan and a product any day of the week!

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Old 05-15-2016, 12:20 PM   #84  
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I just dont see what good the article does.There is also a difference between a diet and a lifestyle change and one is easier to stick to then the other.I would hate to see people use this as an excuse not to get healthier or as an excuse for if they gain weight.

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I don't think the article was there to give advice but rather inform on the psychology behind diets and why a lot of people lose/regain after dieting. Her own advice at the end was completely out of place, I admit, but I believe the research she presents could be of value to some people.
I see a lot of people diet, lose loads of weight and then return to 3FC having regained it all. Dieting does something to the mindset that makes a lot of people want to eat more. The theory behind a metabolic set point was interesting to me, plus the theory behind stress caused by dieting can be a catalyst to weight gain. I've experienced similar symptoms when dieting.

I actually do think that mindful eating would help people lose weight, to argue against your point. It's definitely not as simple, but I believe in western society we really chow down on food at an alarming rate. When living in Japan my Japanese friends were shocked to see how fast I ate. I read a book called "The Japan diet" where I took away the lesson to eat slowly. It tries to teach the reader to eat a bite of food, but down the utensils, sit, chew, perhaps take a sip of water and add to table conversation, then begin again. When I practiced this method I was shocked at how full I felt so early in the meal, sometimes I'd eat less than half a meal before stopping. The Japanese also focus on vegetables and fish being the main event on their table, while grains are a side dish. Personally I'll take advice from the people who have the lowest obesity rate in the world and the longest life expectancy in the world over someone trying to sell me a diet plan and a product any day of the week!
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Old 05-15-2016, 01:45 PM   #85  
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I just dont see what good the article does.There is also a difference between a diet and a lifestyle change and one is easier to stick to then the other.I would hate to see people use this as an excuse not to get healthier or as an excuse for if they gain weight.
I don't think the article is supposed to DO anything, it's basically an article saying "here are a number of studies that have been done and here are the results." It also touches upon the subject of adolescent girls who identify themselves as dieters and the damage it can cause to a young persons mentality when they constantly feel they have to eat less to look good. Young people who underwent a program that taught them about body confidence went on to maintain weight in comparison to those who didn't who then went on to gain weight. The article isn't preaching a methodology to weight loss or discouraging those to not eat healthy, it's basically saying that here are some examples of people who lost/maintained a healthy weight when they dropped the stresses of a strict diet.

We live in a world where having the perfect body image is thrust upon us wherever we turn. Especially as women. I believe that the stress caused to achieve such perfection can cause weight gain. I believe this article touches upon a lifestyle change that CAN be beneficial - one where we don't hate on our own bodies so much and release that stress to be perfect. I've never met an overweight/obese person who wants to be that way, I wonder if they didn't feel like the world wanted them to lose weight would they just begin to eat less on their own because they would no longer stress so much about it?
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Old 05-15-2016, 05:06 PM   #86  
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For me at least, the problem in the past has been that I KNOW it needs to be a lifestyle change, but that creates a slower weight loss. It's not as dramatic as when I actually diet. Right now I can honestly say I am in the middle of changing my lifestyle, but am only having maybe 1-2 lbs lost a week as opposed to when I am actively dieting I can lose 5+ a week.
Because, and I can only speak for myself, I can't just up and change my lifestyle completely over night and make the diet my real life reality. I have added in physical activity and time dancing with old friends, and am slowly making different choices with my eating, but it is a little discouraging to stick with the new changes when there aren't any BIG short term results.

Rie - Congrats!!!! Also, it was so uncalled for for that woman to intentionally make you nervous. I don't understand people who do that, I used to be a caseworker for Welfare and came across the same thing all the time. Even if we don't believe someone, there is no reason to make them feel badly! Ugh.

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Old 05-16-2016, 12:02 PM   #87  
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Week 4 Charts everyone!

Overall Chart:


20-Somethings Chart:
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Old 05-16-2016, 12:16 PM   #88  
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For me at least, the problem in the past has been that I KNOW it needs to be a lifestyle change, but that creates a slower weight loss. It's not as dramatic as when I actually diet. Right now I can honestly say I am in the middle of changing my lifestyle, but am only having maybe 1-2 lbs lost a week as opposed to when I am actively dieting I can lose 5+ a week.
Because, and I can only speak for myself, I can't just up and change my lifestyle completely over night and make the diet my real life reality. I have added in physical activity and time dancing with old friends, and am slowly making different choices with my eating, but it is a little discouraging to stick with the new changes when there aren't any BIG short term results.

Rie - Congrats!!!! Also, it was so uncalled for for that woman to intentionally make you nervous. I don't understand people who do that, I used to be a caseworker for Welfare and came across the same thing all the time. Even if we don't believe someone, there is no reason to make them feel badly! Ugh.
First of all - I really like your avatar! I honestly feel like there is a healthy, athletic version of myself inside my flabby body that is waiting to break through! Yeah, it was pretty uncalled for considering she approved us the next day! I'm glad there are people out there like yourself who don't abuse their power.

Now onto your post . Do you feel you have to be losing dramatically each week? I read your post and I would be over the moon if I was losing 1-2 lbs consistently! You should be really happy too. It's probably ridiculous, but when I'm losing slowly I feel safer almost? Almost like it's not a fluke or I won't get loose skin because my weight loss was steady rather than all at once. I might be biased, how people lose the weight is their business, but I always recommend slow 10% adjustments to your current lifestyle for a slow and gradual weight loss. Work out 3 times a week for 20 minutes, then increase the time to 30 minutes, then increase it to 4 times a week etc. Also with food I used to eat a lot of bread, chips, sweet treats. Each week I would take out a piece of junk food and replace it with a healthy snack. Then I replaced white bread for whole grain. Exercise made me want to eat healthier and seeing the scale drop cemented this change in my lifestyle. If I suddenly completely changed my way of exercising and eating overnight I'd be screwed immediately! I'd probably binge eat just down to stress.

I think mentally too if you spend longer losing weight you're less likely to regain because you remember how much time and effort it took. If I were to lose 35 lbs in 2 months I might not appreciate what that really means, if that makes sense? Whereas if I spent 1 year losing that amount then I'm more likely to take care of myself because it would feel like I really worked for it. Just some personal thoughts! I find this subject interesting.
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Old 05-16-2016, 11:33 PM   #89  
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Aaaahh forgot to weigh in on time again! And this was a actually a good week, 126.2, down 1.2 pounds!

I've been keeping track of my calories via LoseIt-- not limiting myself to a certain number per say, just making myself write everything down every day. And it's amazing the impact it has! I lost over 4 pounds in 2 days. So now I'm just commiting to doing that. Sorry I've been kind of mia guys!
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Old 05-17-2016, 01:50 PM   #90  
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Hey guys!

Life Update: Packing has been going well so far. I always dislike how cluttered everything gets in the process of moving, I just spent a while tidying our living area so we're not living in a mess leading up to our move! I'm always overly organised in everything I do, so I've essentially planned to pack a room a day leading up to the move. Yesterday was kitchen day, we managed to fill a good 4 boxes worth of stuff, which to me is surprising since I thought we didn't have that much stuff after living with in-laws for a year! Today through Thursday I'm going to work on gathering all the knickknacks we've spread out over the house. Friday will be non-essential bathroom items day, Saturday will be non-essential clothes day then Sunday we'll be packing a travel bag for the road before finishing everything left including electronics. I really want to just be over and done with and get going in all honesty! I'm an impatient person at heart so once I know we're going somewhere I want to go NOW.

In a whirlwind decision the BF's Dad has bought a new car, he decided to do so on Friday and yesterday (Monday) he bought a new one. Not brand new, but practically new. I tell you this because we're getting his old car, a 10 year old BMW! It's 10 years old but only has 80,000 miles and he's selling it to us at an excellent price. We're essentially going to owe them the money when we can so it won't be as stressful as making monthly car payments with interest tacked on over the years. Having 2 cars is going to make life in Atlanta so much easier, there are a couple of running trails I wanted to run but would need a car for it. On the days where BF is working I wouldn't have a car, but not anymore! Woohoo!

Weight loss, naturally, has been on the back burner. I always advise those who are going through a stressful time to try their best but not to worry, so I need to follow my own advice. I'm going to go to my last Yoga class at my favourite yoga place today, then Thursday will be my last dance class. I didn't really make many friends so it won't be too hard to say goodbye, but I will miss the classes! I'm not sure how easily I'll be able to find a dance place in Atlanta on ClassPass, fingers crossed! Not looking forward to sampling all the studios all over again before finding somewhere I really like!

I'm back up to 167 lbs which is my starting weight, I'm quite happy it's not over that. The other day, however, I stepped on the scale and it was 169 lbs! Ahh, too close for comfort! Thankfully it was water weight.
I have also drawn up my meal plan for our first week in our new home! I can't wait! I've planned breakfasts, lunches, snacks and dinner. If I give myself too much freedom then I end up overeating but if I buy EXACTLY what I need then I know that I'll do well. On the menu is mango curry, miso salmon with vegetable stir fry, one night free to eat out and then cajun chicken wings with vegetable kebobs. I'm going vegetable crazy, but I actually can't wait because cooked vegetables are way more delicious than raw in my opinion!

--------------------------------------------

Tiny - No worries! All I ask is you make sure to weigh in on time for the last week or you'll miss out being on the final chart! A week later is no big deal leading up to the end though. Woohoo, congrats on 1.2 lbs down, that's awesome! I'm glad to hear that just staying accountable without limitations has helped you so much. Keep up the excellent work!
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