Gained weight back, lacking motivation

  • Last year I lost 65 lbs. It was the most weight I've ever lost trying, and I felt amazing. Then, I almost died due to a medical issue (randomly going blind and an allergic reaction to an MRI)... THEN a month later I had another personal trauma. Honestly I felt very depressed and anxious after those and with school and internships I went to food for comfort.. I gained 60 lbs back. It feels HORRIBLE. Its almost worst than the feeling of being overweight in the beginning... because I feel like this is more my own fault for gaining it back.

    Im trying so hard to get back into that kick butt mode of losing weight again, and I need some tips or advice. How do I let my own shame/guilt get out of the way and get back to working hard and feeling motivated? Its just so difficult a second time around, I feel like I shouldn't have gained it back and I could be so different than I am right now.
  • Starting can be the hardest part.

    I just want to say that most of us here have gone through some type of regain, I know I have! And it does suck. BUT beating yourself up about it only makes it worse. All that negativity and being mad at yourself, isn't going to bring you any closer to your goal. The hardest/best thing to do right this minute is: 1) realize your not perfect and that's ok, 2) FORGIVE yourself (after all, you're only human), and 3) let go of any anger or bad mentality "I could be at ### if I hadn't stopped." You'll have a much easier time moving forward. I've tried to shame or guilt myself into losing weight and it never worked.

    The good news is that you've done this before and you can do it again! The first time around was a learning experience, this time youre a veteran and you know what to expect. This is the perfect time to look back on what you did before, what worked and what didn't. What habits were easy to stick to, which didn't, and why?

    I struggle with depression and anxiety as well and often turn to food for comfort. I like to journal when I notice Im in the mood to eat everything in my house. If I want to stress eat and don't know why, writing down my feelings usually helps me get some clarity/ makes me feel a little better. It may not work for everyone, but I think it's worth giving a try. Finding other things to distract/comfort you when you feel stressed/anxious can go a long way. It just depends on what you like.
  • thank you for the response. Its nice to know people are going through the same thing. I need to be less hard on myself.... and you're right I am a veteran now lol
  • I'm sorry you're going through this. In my own weight loss I've had several partial regains (just coming back from one right now, in fact. I gained about 15lb.) Even such relatively small gains have felt horrible and traumatic, so I can't even imagine how hard it must be for you. Maybe some things I have learned can be helpful:

    -Do not listen to the negative voice, guilt, regret or self-hatred. Try to find your love for yourself and your positive reasons for wanting to lose weight again. Sort of like this: 'It's ok to be fat; my size doesn't determine my worth. But I would like to be thinner because it felt wonderful and I want this again, so I'm going to do it.'

    -Don't compare what is to what might have been. We are not perfect. We can learn from success, but even more from mistakes. You may take longer to reach your goal, but you learned and grew along the way.
    This quote always helps me to put everything in perspective:
    https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com...1ae61d6329.jpg

    And of course the quote in my signature!

    Have a lovely, successful day
  • Beating yourself up is not productive. It serves no purpose. Let it go.

    I don't know how you get back in the groove. For me, it wasn't ever a kick-butt thing. It's a dedication and determination thing. I lost a bunch, gained a little, then had to get back into my weight loss habits. I just kept trying. In a couple weeks, I was back in the groove.

    No extremes, just building the good habits that work for me. I stumble, but I get back up.

    Sing some Chumbawamba. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2H5uWRjFsGc

    Once I'm really in the groove, I like it. I'm happier because I feel better and it works.

    So, my advice is to not give up. Keep trying. You'll get there.
  • I'm in a very similar boat. A year and a half ago I had made it to my goal weight and was doing great but then I was involved in an incident that triggered my PTSD. Just a week ago I flunked out of college. Between my depression keeping from being active and stress eating and bingeing I've gained 65 pounds and I'm the heaviest I've ever been. This past week I had to go shopping for clothes for my new job and I wanted to cry because nothing fit the way it used to.

    Maybe together we can help each other get back on track and stay on track.
  • I lost 80 lbs last year and felt so good! I've slowly gained back about 40 lbs and I feel super discouraged. I went from a size 18 to a size 8 and now i'm back to a size 12. I still work out almost every day and eat fairly healthy most of the time so I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing wrong and I'm starting to lose motivation. I'm wondering if I ate too little when I lost all my weight and now my metabolism is messed up. Or am i allowing myself too many cheat days or meals? I'm just really upset with myself over all. I keep trying to start up my healthy eating and work out plan and it'll last about a week and I normally eat crappy over the weekend and try to start it again the next week. Its a vicious cycle. Can anyone help?
  • I'm in the same boat. I'm finally back at 3fc again after having my son and regaining all the weight I lost last year plus 10 more lbs 😶. I feel like giving up too.

    Just seeing all the responses you've gotten and the fact that you reached out for support to keep going gives me strength. We've done this before, we can do it again! 💕💕
  • I'm right here with you! Gained 30 lbs, which is 10 lbs more than what I had worked hard to lose. Don't give up, the best thing about this time around is that you know you can do it and that you're not alone! We've all gained so much knowledge from our experiences. For example, I know for a fact that sugar, whether in sweets form or added, has been the cause of my weight gain. I also know that I need to work on stress management. Knowing these things makes me feel a little bit more confident than the first time around because at least I'm aware of the things that make things worse. Be patient and be kind to yourself. Encourage yourself just like you would encourage a good friend!!
  • I also have gained back weight from my first weight loss journey. I started at 200lbs, went down to 135lbs, and now I am around 180lbs. I slowly gained the weight back over two years. Everytime I stepped on the scale and noticed my weight went up, I was more anxious and stressed about it that I ate even more. And well, 50lbs later, here I am back to getting on my journey.

    I had a year to two years of self-acceptance issues because I let myself gain the weight back that I worked so hard to get rid of. But now, I started the Optifast800 program through the Kaiser Weight Management Program. It is very, VERY pricey, but two weeks in, and I already feel proud of myself for making the decision to lose weight again. I stepped on the scale and I lost 7 pounds so far!

    I know this may not be the solution for you, but I felt so good when I finally made the decision to get my butt up and do something. If I can do it, you can too .
  • You are not alone in the process. You may have gained weight back, but you can lose it again and get back to where you want to be. We all screw up, me more so than anyone, but you need to realize that this is a process and there will be ups and downs. I know you will get that passion to lose weight again because you already did it once =). I believe in you and I know you can do it!
  • Like all of you, I'm a member of the club. Got down to 170 from 226 only to jump up to 252. I'm not at 228, but still. It sucks. I hit goal. We can do it again though. We just have to want it. We've done it before and know it's possible. I'm trying to assess what went wrong. Like you, I feel like I haven't eaten that poorly. Unlike you, I know why I gained. Too little activity, too much healthy food, and too much booze. It'll take time, but we will get there again.