So I've had my gym membership since July 2011. From July-November 2011 I was quite committed, going atleast 3-4 times a week. Then January 2012 came around and I completely stopped going. It's now September and I have not gone since January of this year. Absolutely terrible, I know. And sure enough the gym is charging me every month, and I'm not even using it! Complete waste of money.
I don't know why I can't get myself to go... I don't know if it's laziness or just shyness and anxiety. Maybe it's a combination of all three. I just feel so fat and out of shape. I'm 217 right now, and my goal weight as of now is 150. The lowest I've ever been is 185, which was 4 years ago when I first started college. I've let myself go since then, and I blame myself for that due to my laziness and poor food choices.
I REALLY want to go back to the gym. I tell myself everyday, that tomorrow I will go. But it never happens. I just get lazy, unmotivated, and start making excuses. And then I start thinking about all the people who are going to judge me at the gym. I feel like everyone at the gym STARES at me when I walk in and then work-out. There are people of all ages and sizes at my gym, but I still feel like I'm being judged. I know this is so stupid of me to feel like this. I just wish I could get motivated again. Ugh this sucks!
I wish I had something clever to say, but I just wanted you to know I feel the exact same way. You're not alone. I've been paying for my membership for over two years now. I went the first month with a friend but I just haven't been able to bring myself to go. I don't cancel because I convince myself I'll start going. It's a really nice gym and it's like half a mile from my house so I have no excuse. They have a pool and group classes that I really would like to attend like zumba, yoga, pilates, step, body work, and aqua fit. My husband belongs and tries to get me to go with him but I'm just so frozen. I'm afraid.
I had a terrible experience in middle school gym class that ruined my self esteem and I really have a hard time overcoming those feelings of inadequacy. I feel like a huge out of shape failure. No one understands and my husband thinks I should just get over it suck it up and go (might I mention that he played high school football, ran track, wrestled, and has never had a weight problem...I was overweight my whole life and was on the newspaper and did competitive public speaking.... need I say more lol). I have terrible exercise related anxiety. You have no idea how many times I've gone and bought a gym outfit and tried to psych myself up that today is the day. Or tomorrow. Or I'll start next week...
Hopefully someone who has overcome it has some great advice on what worked for them. I just wanted you to know that there are others out there who feel the same
whenever I dont want to go, I say to myself "ok all you have to do is drive there and walk through the door. You dont have to work hard, you dont even have to break a sweat. You just have to go through the door". Its hard for me to argue with that. And then when I'm there, I can usually persuade myself to work hard. Even if I dont, going there and walking for 15 minutes is 15 minutes more exercise than I would have got normally (and 15 minutes where I'm not stuffing my face due to gym-not-going-guilt. If its anxiety stopping you from going, this might not work, but it kinda takes the pressure off for me
Good advice I-ghost.
The hardest part is getting there. Put on your workout clothes and just walk thru the door. Do 20 mins on the bicycle.
Do you have a friend that also belongs? Maybe you can go together.
I used to feel like that, and sometimes I still do. I hate going over to the weights side of my gym because I think the people around me wonder what I'm doing over there. But you can't let it get to you! People around you can think what ever they want (though I highly doubt they do) but the sooner you walk through those doors, the sooner you walk out. AND the start to you looking and feeling better.
I also listen to some bumping music which kind of helps me zone out the people around me. You are only there to focus on yourself so maybe some good music can help ease your mind.
Another thing, sometimes the only way I can get myself to go to the gym is by reminding myself that if I choose to work out that day, I get to eat more overall. Lol. Not sure if that helps you at all, but more food is always good motivation for me.
I live near a college, so my gym is FULL of young muscular guys. When I first started going it was SO scary, but one day I was standing at the counter and one of the guys came up to order a shake and introduced himself. He was extremely nice and made me feel a little more welcome in the place. Since then I've tried to leave myself a little more open to people instead of looking terrified when I walk through the door. A lot of the guys are very willing to help, they smile and say hello, they give compliments that aren't creepy, they're NICE. Sometimes you just have to give people the benefit of the doubt. I spend way more time staring at them than they do staring at anything else. They're too busy in the mirror to notice what's going on around them.
It takes time to get rid of that "EVERYONE IS LOOKING AT ME!" feeling, but I promise people aren't as scary as they seem. The more you go, the more comfortable you'll feel. You're all there for the same purpose and I'm sure most people feel the same way you do!
I feel the same way too. I used to only do the scheduled classes, and once the kickboxing instructor left I really wasn't as interested. I was never comfortable there, and definitely not comfortable enough to explore outside the classes.
Not that this is necessarily some advice, but what I personally did was ditch the membership. I like to go hiking, jog in the mornings, and can do fitness videos on my tv (this is where I do my kickboxing). I also used the money I saved on the gym membership to buy equipment. Maybe I could push myself a little harder at the gym, but I am more active and happier doing my workouts just doing it alone.
Been there, done that and got the video However I started back at the gym in July and have been going steadily 3-4 times a week. I know I don't have to flog myself senseless, and if I just want to go and lift weights I will do that. But I know I have to go, I have to get in through the door. Just put one foot in front of the other. I guarantee after the first time it will get easier and you will go for longer, more often. BTW people aren't looking at you. They are usually so swallowed up by what they are doing that they don't even see others- or they are too busy looking at themselves !! Good luck. You can do it. No-one is stopping you but you.
I feel the same way. I did the same thing, too. Last fall I was doing really well and going to the gym 3+ times per week. Then in January I started getting really busy between school and the clinic I was doing. I had not gone again until 2 weeks ago.
I still feel really anxious and I am not ready to go by myself. Luckily I can usually persuade my fiance to come with me and I have a friend who is a member as well. Hopefully someday I will feel comfortable going on my own.
That is the only recommendation I can make-- bring a friend or a family member and you will feel more secure.
I have posted a link to this blog before, but I am not sure how to do it from my phone. Just Google 'Hey fat girl.' I loved it, and it helped me get through some free weight anxiety.
I weigh 227 pounds, and wear snug shorts to avoid thigh chafing. I also don't wear make up to the gym. But I think the testosterone boys respect that I am there to work. I have never had anyone treat me badly. I usually get quiet respect. One time, I was asked on a date. ;-) I could not have looked more disgusting, as I was also, at that point, drippin iug with sweat.
Last edited by LaurieDawn; 09-24-2012 at 01:35 PM.
you are definitely not alone with your gym anxiety. i also hate crowds so if i can, i'll go during off-peak hours. that might help in the beginning...once you get more comfortable at the gym then you can go during busier times.
i worry too that people are looking at me but i just don't allow myself to think that way anymore. everyone there is in the same boat...in that they also want to be healthy. that helps me through it. or i'll just focus on my music or on a tv screen until i've completed my workout
You can always try going very early in the morning when the gym first opens. When I was at my heavest weight 3 yrs ago at 265 this is what I would do I would go early in the morning hours when they opened at 5 am I did this until I felt more comfortable to go during regular hours. You can also try going to the gym later in the evenings around 7pm this is when the crowd dies down. You can do it and trust me no one is staring at you. Think of it this way at least you are trying to make a healthy change in your life. Good luck and keep us updated.
Gym anxiety! HELP PLEASE!
However I started back at the gym in July and have been going steadily 3-4 times a week. I know I don't have to flog myself senseless, and if I just want to go and lift weights I will do that. But I know I have to go, I have to get in through the door. Just put one foot in front of the other. I guarantee after the first time it will get easier and you will go for longer, more often. BTW people aren't looking at you. They are usually so swallowed up by what they are doing that they don't even see others- or they are too busy looking at themselves !! Good luck. You can do it. No-one is stopping you but you.
