I am kinda of a newbie (left and came back). I am a graduate student in my mid 20s and I feel like my life has been taken over by weight loss! I think about losing weight 24/7. All I do is read success stories, look at calories, read articles about nutrition. I rather read about weight loss than doing my homework! It is crazy! I stay up reading stuff until 2:00am and procrastinate on my work.
Sometimes I turn down dinner invitations or parties because I don't want to go out and be tempted by food. Or I tell myself "I will just go out in a few months when I lose all this extra weight". I am not living my life at all. What if I never lose the weight? I feel like I have put my life on hold to lose weight and that's all I am focusing on. I keep thinking that once I lose the weight, I can be super happy outgoing etc. I don't even buy clothes anymore because I just want to wait until I reach my goal.
For those who have lost significant amount of weight, do you think you started enjoying life when you reached your goal weight? For those who are in the process, do you feel the same way I do or am I just crazy? Is this normal?
I made a commitment to myself this past September to do the weight loss thing for a year. To get rid of external influences and just focus on my health. It sucks sometimes and I miss going out, drinking, parties, etc. But in the grand scheme of things what's a year away from that stuff going to do? So far it's gotten me almost 60 lbs closer to my goal weight (I lost about 13 before last summer when I first joined 3fc), newfound confidence, and a pretty awesome outlook for the future. I'll live life when I begin maintaining and for some people my way wouldn't work but you've gotta find the balance that's right for you.
I was a lot like you when I first started... Every day at work I was on 3FC.. I was always researching foods, planning meals.. every night I would go to Yoga, then home... It completely consumed my life.. I maybe have talked about it enough to annoy/loose a few friends to be honest. But you get over it.. Its new is all. I am not at my goal, but I have reached the half way point, and I have learned that as essential planning is, that I can survive a night out by winging it. I am not going to lie, those first months.. I would never have made it, but you grow and learn. (I started July 5th at 209lb. I weighed in today at 166 (I did not update my ticker, as I prefer to see a number more than once before calling it a victory) If anything, I need to get back on track.. my food has been great, and I am still seeing results, but I know I am not seeing the results I would be seeing if I were working out at all (other than the walks I bring my dog on).
Just remember, any sacrifices you make now will be well worth it in the long run! Right now you are learning what works for you.
I am still in this phase and I am happy I am. I need to focus on myself. Not doing this caused me to get obese in the first place...Am I going along a borderline obsession phase with it? Yes...but its what it takes for me to stay focused and get to my goal I moved to a new town a few months back and haven't really had a chance to meet new people. Which is a blessing because where I was before, I had alot of friends and was always going out.
Im just like you. My main focus is my weight-loss. I dont go out. I dont do anything besides work and work-out. I spend a lot of time on here, and a lot of time online in general looking up helpful info.
I've always been a bit like this tho. But its getting worse after my weight-loss journey started. Sadly I no longer have any friends. But strangly Im okay with that most of the time. As for the part about "living life". I cant really remember if I ever have.. But Im hoping this weight-loss is going to help with my self-esteem. Im not expecting a miracle, but atleast its one step in the right direction.
When it comes to losing weight it's about starting as you mean to go on and developing new habits.
As such I think it's important to do now the things you plan to do when you're lighter as it helps to keep things moderate when you do finally reach goal.
Also think it's perfectly normal to be a little single minded early on, It can take that to break habits of a lifetime.
I am with you. Honestly, I am focusing on weight loss like it's my job! I think about it all the time and spend time on 3FC, logging my food, planning my meals, planning my food shopping, doing or planning my exercise/fitness, researching diet/fitness articles online... I am a stay at home mom right now, and this is the first year all my kids are in school, so I finally have a chance to focus more on myself. When my kids are at home, my diet/exercise plans go off track.
The only reason I have been able to lose weight is to let go of the stress of working (last year I got laid off) and the stress of having little ones at home all day. It's possible to lose weight while working or having young kids, but I personally wasn't able to do it - but then, I was pretty far gone - obese and sick with hypertension.
I feel like I want to stay obsessed with losing weight until I reach my goal - then I want to be obsessed with maintaining. Once I lose interest, the scale will go up again.
I calorie count, so I can have anything as long as it fits into the day's count. I went out to eat a lot during my weight loss and even though weight loss was a priority in my life (it's now maintenance/fitness) I still wanted to enjoy myself and hang out with my friends.
I go out less now just because I'm trying to save money for a wedding, but I don't want to lock myself away from the world just so I can be thin—it's not worth that much of a headache.
Just because I do enjoy going out doesn't mean that I totally let my plans fall to the wayside. I am picky about the restaurants we go to (no buffets allowed or I won't go) and picky about the nights I go out (if there's a class at the gym I want to go to, I'm not hanging out). My friends know this and thankfully they're mostly supportive. One of them gave me a hard time once, but the rest of the group didn't quite like that and has limited contact with her.
Chiming in with the majority of the chorus here. I just started my weight loss efforts a month ago and ever since I decided I was going to do this, I've been consumed like you are. It's all I can think about - both the process and life after. One thing I will say is (as others have said) you shouldn't hold yourself back in going out and the like. Yes there will be temptation, but trust me when I say you will feel so much better about yourself and your choices when you say no to the things you should! We've had food day at work once or twice since I started watching what I eat and I steadfastly refused to touch anything other than the veggie tray. It was a horrible temptation because the food was right behind me. I could literally turn around and there was this huge spread... Ok, I'm exaggerating, but there was some very tempting cookies and cake and queso... Another thing that's helped me when I go out to eat is look at the menu beforehand and know what you're going to get. That's helped me so much!
When you say you don't buy clothes anymore, are yours working all right? I'm the sort that wears mine out until I absolutely cannot wear them anymore. I wear the same things every single week. I think I have maybe five full outfits if even that, that I mix and match. Sometimes you need to buy clothes and not even like a whole wardrobe, but maybe just an outfit or two. Trust me when I say that having a new outfit that fits -especially when you can buy a size down- makes you feel awesome.
EDIT - whenever I think that I am depriving myself of a social life or all the delish food (even healthy food cannot compare to some of the reallll bad stuff that you just can't substitute) I think - whats a few months - compared to the years that I will have to spend hating my weight?
I can either stay at an unhappy weight for years and years...or I can sacrifice a few months and have years and years ahead of me where I am healthier, fitter and HOTTER! lol
Last edited by pixelllate; 02-21-2012 at 11:19 AM.
At first I was like that because I NEEDED to educate myself and be inspired because I never thought I could do it. I don't have homework to do, so maybe you should dedicate time to this research and time to school ;p. But it's good to want to educate yourself - as long as you're applying what you learn to your weight loss.
Thinking about it all the time will fade once you start seeing results. I always firmly communicate that weight loss isn't a temporary diet plan or exercise routine - it's a lifestyle change. When you start off you're going to change what that means until you feel happy. I must have tried at least 4 different ways of eating until I found one I'm happy with. Once you're on your way you just let it be apart of your life and stop thinking of it all the time.
It's good that you're aware of weight loss, but it is sad to see it get in the way of your social life. I always go out to meals and I enjoy myself and eat what I want. One meal isn't going to make me gain back 45 lbs! But if you have a real problem eating out - look at the menu, decide what you want and don't even LOOK at the menu when you're there - just order what you decided beforehand.
Live life, be happy - ENJOY YOURSELF! The more you stress on weight loss the less success you'll have!
Sometimes I feel the way that you do--that it's not normal for me to be obsessing over every bite of food I take. But then, very few people have ever successfully lost weight without research, dedication, and concentration. Significant weight loss doesn't happen by accident.
I think I'll always have an awareness of what eating mindfully can do for me even after I hit my goal, so a consideration of calories and nutritional value will likely never leave me completely. But if it keeps me healthy, I don't even see it as a price to pay.
Think of it this way: you're putting the better part of a year of your life on hold so that you can better enjoy the years to come--and have more of them.
At first I was like that because I NEEDED to educate myself and be inspired because I never thought I could do it. I don't have homework to do, so maybe you should dedicate time to this research and time to school ;p. But it's good to want to educate yourself - as long as you're applying what you learn to your weight loss.
Thinking about it all the time will fade once you start seeing results. I always firmly communicate that weight loss isn't a temporary diet plan or exercise routine - it's a lifestyle change. When you start off you're going to change what that means until you feel happy. I must have tried at least 4 different ways of eating until I found one I'm happy with. Once you're on your way you just let it be apart of your life and stop thinking of it all the time.
It's good that you're aware of weight loss, but it is sad to see it get in the way of your social life. I always go out to meals and I enjoy myself and eat what I want. One meal isn't going to make me gain back 45 lbs! But if you have a real problem eating out - look at the menu, decide what you want and don't even LOOK at the menu when you're there - just order what you decided beforehand.
Live life, be happy - ENJOY YOURSELF! The more you stress on weight loss the less success you'll have!
Totally-everyone is diff! For me, I don't usually eat out - because I usually don't like the food and I like eating at home. Its pretty tasty, but I don't find the food from the places I go out to as good as homemade, so I don't find it worth it. It took me years to build up the self-esteem to say "no thanks" even if its awkward to just drink water, but I'm so much happier doing that. Nothing more annoying than overeating when its not even tasty lol!
Some mags suggest that you come up with healthier activities but when it boils down to it, most ppl just wanna socialize by going out to eat. I like it too, even if I'm not eating with them.
When I first started I was totally into it like you. I needed to be that way. I spent my mid twenties taking care of others and it was time for me. However, I never let it stop me from living life. Yes, I stopped drinking with friends but I didn't stop going out with them. I don't need drinks and high calorie meals to have fun.
My friend and I went to a Japanese restaurant last week and I chose something in my allotment and that was that. We had a good time talking about randomness. I think it is important to find a balance. Stay true to your plan but also learn how to say no when needed. You can still live.
I think you kind of have to resolve to find a balance. Besides, dieting is a phase - eating right and maintaining your health is a lifestyle. I.e. It's something that eventually has to be incorporated into your everyday "living life" life in order to succeed long-term.
I'm still obsessed with weight loss, but I don't let it get in the way of my other priorities, like studying or loved ones.
I've lost 25 lbs since early Jan. If I ONLY lived for weight-loss, I think I'd have driven myself nuts by now.
When do you start "living life"?
because I just want to wait until I reach my goal.
I moved to a new town a few months back and haven't really had a chance to meet new people. Which is a blessing because where I was before, I had alot of friends and was always going out. 
