For almost all my life I've been a plus plus size. I went on a diet last year and went from 230 to 127(last night weigh in). All of my friends and parents are shocked that I were able to lose that much.
However recently my mom has been bugging me about me being obsessed with losing weight and is progressing towards the mentality of aneroxia.
I intially set my goal to be 140(145) then I just kept moving it down a little by little because I am still not happy about my appearance. When I hit 130 I decided that I am fine, but when I went to try out this super girly dress store called Betsy Johnson, I can't fit into a size 8! I am normally a size 4-6 but I had to wear size 10 with betsy's. It was a big shock to me and I was extremely discouraged/butthurt.
Recently I've been dreading to eat anything. I had a 6inch subway and a cup of noodle yesterday and have been kicking myself ever since. I love food, the greatest moment of my day is to eat food. But, for some reason, I just can't eat anything without feeling extremely guilty.
My mom officially announced to me she doesnt want me losing more weight infact, she wants me to gain 10pounds. I don't want to be unhealthy weight and I am so far from being underweight. I would love to get some insight on how you guys deal with similar situation, am I really progressing towards a mental illness?