3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

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-   20-Somethings (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/20-somethings-56/)
-   -   Anyone else? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/20-somethings/238615-anyone-else.html)

luciddepths 07-20-2011 11:19 AM

Anyone else?
 
Anyone else finding it hard to express themselves lately on these boards?

I'm having a really hard time and lately no matter what the topic is there is always some that go against what you're saying and do not give it up! Instead of making their point...the keep pushing their opinion on to anyone that responds, making it hard for those with a different point of view express themselves. I know these forums are here for everyone to talk/discuss etc but lately it seems more aggressive!


For myself I've created and deleted many threads because I feel that is what will happen, so I just give up an don't post. I used to really like reading the forums and posting but as of late? :(

Am I the only one to notice this?

doopdoop 07-20-2011 01:06 PM

That's what happens when you get a bunch of people together who haven't had a refined carb in 9 months :-P

I keed, I keed. I think people come off differently in writing than they would if you were having these conversations in person. It's hard to interpret someone's tone, so I wouldn't take it too personally. Also, being anonymous on the big ol' intarwebs tends to bring out the jackass in people, so if someone is being truly abrasive, they might just be taking out some of their inner angst in one of the few places where a person can do that without real repercussions.

Not that that makes it right, but you can't really control the actions of others, unfortunately.

jessica2231 07-20-2011 01:09 PM

i wouldnt worry about it love. I agree with doopdoop. also everyones always going to have different point of views. take what you want and leave what you dont. just keep yourself positive and your doing what you need to. :)

another thing. this place is for the different point of views so embrace. i think everyone gets that feeling sometimes. but just dont take it to heart. :)

keep strong gurly!

vDub Lynxx 07-20-2011 01:19 PM

well i've never had that happen to me on here but i dont post too much (especially lately).. but i remember reading another thread where (im pretty sure it was you) were almost getting attacked for every sentance in your post! obviously people are going to have different opinions and the forums are the perfect place to express them but its one thing to disagree with someone and a whole other to pick apart every.single.thing. they say and go on and on about it. i think thats part of the reason i dont do alot of posting on here.. because i would just end up feeding into the fire lol i know i know 2 wrongs dont make a right but hey, i dont know what to tell ya' haha well good luck anyways hopefully people read your post and realize we're all here for the same reason and say lets agree to disagree and thats that.

Lovely 07-20-2011 01:27 PM

This is just one of those internet things. Not only can tone be lost in writing, but intent is not something everyone agrees on in the first place.

Person A thinks: I'm getting attacked for my expressing an opinion! This sucks!

Person B thinks: This is a great discussion/debate! I'm having fun learning, and I hope it keeps going so we can thoroughly discuss the differences.

Plus a myriad of different intentions in between.

luciddepths 07-20-2011 01:51 PM

Dub that's what I meant more just picking apart and not letting it die haha

Oh I'm not taking it to heart, it's just I've noticed it happening more and more here and I think it's scaring some away...from posting (more because it becomes a hassle and who wants to read constant arguing/picking apart)?

munstermommy 07-20-2011 01:58 PM

Hi,
I am super new to 3FC but so far everyone has been awesome, welcoming, and encouraging. I'm not really sure what types of threads/discussions you are talking about...are you debating life styles, calorie counting, exercise regime, how to lose/maintain, etc.? I think that since everyone has different physiology, body composition, and work ethic, all of those things are specific to the individual. If you are just talking about how you are doing and feeling personally, I think it is definitely wrong for people to attack/censure you in any way. We want to be supportive and help each other! However, there are always going to be debates when it comes to "objective" stuff with diet and weight loss, since it technically is a "science." So many people have different ways of doing things, and love to be "right" so they disagree with you at every turn if you don't do exactly what they do! I think you just have to hold strong to what works for you, and respectfully disagree and try to encourage those people to continue to do what works for them, and you will do what works for YOU. You sound like an awesome person, and sometimes you just have to get a little bit hard core to get your point across too! Keep working hard and staying positive, that's the key to everything. I love the girls that post in the weekly chat, that's mostly where I have been so maybe come join us? Hope you have an awesome day and keep kicking calorie butt! :hug::carrot::carrot::carrot:

lovehopefaith 07-20-2011 10:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luciddepths (Post 3946591)
Anyone else finding it hard to express themselves lately on these boards?

I'm having a really hard time and lately no matter what the topic is there is always some that go against what you're saying and do not give it up! Instead of making their point...the keep pushing their opinion on to anyone that responds, making it hard for those with a different point of view express themselves. I know these forums are here for everyone to talk/discuss etc but lately it seems more aggressive!


For myself I've created and deleted many threads because I feel that is what will happen, so I just give up an don't post. I used to really like reading the forums and posting but as of late? :(

Am I the only one to notice this?

Preach it Girly! Could not agree with you more!!!

How dare you have an opinion that differs to mine. You are wrong and i will keep going on and on and on about because there is absolutely no way that you are just allowed to have an opinion that i don't agree with.. ;)

mateosmama2005 07-21-2011 03:23 AM

I agree with you. I have seen this lately too, I even seen one thread CLOSED because people would just NOT STOP being so harsh. :(

luciddepths 07-21-2011 07:16 PM

i'm glad i'm not the only one who is noticing this... TREND. lol

theox 07-22-2011 02:39 AM

Is this something you're seeing on the 20-something's board? I usually spend most of my time in the 100 lb. Club and General Chatter, and I haven't really noticed it on the threads there. I've seen people disagree on here, but most seem to keep it pretty respectful (IMO, anyway). The one thread that I have seen closed because of the nature of the responses was kind of exceptional (guy came on here to complain about how unattractive he found his fat, supposedly lazy wife, then got very defensive in response to the suggestions and comments made by other posters - it was kind of a downward spiral).

If you feel like you're being picked on or like somebody's just being a jerk, say something. I don't think most of the people on here would intentionally try to make another poster feel bad or harrassed. They may just see the interaction very differently than you do and not realize that they're detracting from others' enjoyment of the site.

:)

mandalinn82 07-22-2011 02:44 AM

The mods try to keep things supportive here, and our forum rules require respect in posting to other members. That said, we can't be everywhere or read everything at once, though, unfortunately. So if you do notice that a thread is taking a turn toward attacking, please use the "Report" feature to let the mods know. We can then close the thread or direct conversation back to the intended topic.

ButterCup85 07-22-2011 06:25 AM

I understand, a lot of times I post new threads no one replies at all. Haha, but it's life. I just delete it and move on, and only post if I really need to. That's why if someone only have 0 or 1 replies I always try to reply no matter what. Feeling left out sucks.

As far as the attacking, I just stay out of anything people are starting to argue in lol. I'm sorry you feel that way. But, stick around! You must, this is for you. Not anyone else. If people feel the need to argue or "be right" whatever. It doesn't matter. Just remember this is for SUPPORT and if you don't feel support report it, step away, or just quit going to that particular thread!


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