[pinkalarmclock]

i know how that is too. if I see someone who is pretty overweight and see them making horrible food choices I notice. I think "if they just stopped that they woudn't be where theyre at"

and i am always noticing when people close to me are making bad food choices and I think don't they know how unhealthy that is? especially with the bf, and I actually say things to him sometimes.

[seafoamgreen]

I'm still in that stage where I'm totally self conscious pretty much all the time in public about how big I am. I'm always comparing myself to the people around me and feeling gigantic. I know this is not a healthy way to be thinking and I am trying not to concentrate on it, but it's just so automatic! I'm also so weary of pictures or videos or anything recording how I currently look. I really can't wait to lose the weight so that when I look at pics that I'm in, I'll be thinking of the great time I was having when the pic was taken and not looking critically to see how fat I looked!

[pinkalarmclock]

yeah. last summer, when i was at my highest, i didn't want to see anybody that I didn't see regularly. i was almost traumatized when old friends of the family were coming to visit, all I could think about was how they were going to notice how bog I had gotten. I even refused to go to places where I knew people who I hadn't seen in a while. I could just imagine how it would be the first things they noticed.

my advice is that those feelings are just going to be there when your uncomfortable with your body. once you are comfortable with your body (either by losing weight or being healthy or what have you) those self conscious feelings will dull to nonexistance.