judgmental
 

So..... I am definitely not a judgmental person when it comes to someone's weight. But I am very judgmental regarding other things. I hate it, but I am! Generally people are stupid sometimes, make dumb decisions, and when we are in our 20s we should know better.

Is anyone else here judgmental, and what are you judgmental about?



(I will open my big mouth later about what I am judgmental about):?:

Im pretty much the opposite- i give people too much slack! Like if someone does something dumb or that might be interpretted as a bit mean i just think that you dont know what is going on for them and they probably didnt realise that what they did/said could be taken like that etc.

Sometimes i do just roll my eyes and want to strangle people though xD

Hmmm. I am occasionally judgmental when people make comments/jokes that I construe as "lame." But being as self-aware as I am, I know that *I* often make comments and jokes that are lame, and it's a quality in myself that I don't like. I really value sarcasm and wit. So, when I see "lameness" in other people, I think I'm really just being overly judgmental of myself...

I tend to be judgmental when it comes to other people's financial decisions. I know that seems a bit over the top, but it's mostly regarding like 5 people in my life. I don't judge the random person at Nordstrom's. Some friends of mine however ...

For instance, we had a friend who lost his job because the company suddenly closed. He was on unemployment. Okay, fine. He wasn't really job hunting at all. His girlfriend was 8 months pregnant. (They've had the child since this.) We went over once to hang out and he'd just purchased two new pairs of shoes, some cologne, etc. It infuriated me! I couldn't stop talking to my husband about it. Same friend's mother told him NOT to accept the job my husband gave him because he "needed to be home with the baby" and he "still had months of unemployment left." Seriously?!! Way to promote active lifestyles! Way to show his newborn daughter (& I know she doesn't process this stuff yet) that daddy was a LOSER when she was born! Blah.

Anyway, that pissed me off. My brother and my husband's brother are both stupid financially too.

Other than that ... I don't really judge too much. Obviously if I read something someone wrote or hear them say something I can't help but think, "Wow, what an idiot." But not quite as judgmental with this as other things

@ Kemery: Yes, I feel the same about this kind of things - there is plenty people like this in my environment, too, and I sometimes feel like I really need to hold it in.

Then, there is hypocracy: A colleague was long term sick recently and another one thought she was skiving. She went on and on about it. When she was tired of helping out she decided to pull a sickie herself just because "S can do it". She even admitted to not being ill, just "not bothered".

Stella

I judge smokers a lot, in particular people who smoke around their children or who complain about having no money but buy a pack of cigarettes every day.

I only started being really judgmental about it when I quit smoking, which is stupid since obviously the relationship to cigarettes is different for all people and some people probably have a significantly harder time quitting than I did. But still, I somehow got all superior about it in my head. I hate it, but I can't really help it. But because I quit, some part of my head doesn't accept cigarettes as a serious addiction (even though I know logically that they are).

Love, LOVE this thread.

Lets see...I am judgmental about people that keep messy houses or messy yards, smokers, folks that lack education by choice, laziness in general, freeloaders and anyone that steals. I also detest crybabies and those that use excuses way too frequently rather than admitting their lack of ambition to accomplish xyz.

I am sure there is a whole host of other issues...LOL...in fact, I think I HAVE the issue rather than the rest of the world in reality...

Thanks for posting this..

I am very judgmental about grammar and spelling and punctuation - about bad writing or incorrect speech in general, really. I joke about being the grammar ****, but it truly has a huge impact on my opinion of someone.

(This is a little bit okay, though, because I'm a writer and I work as a copyeditor...so I get paid to be persnickety!)

I'm kind of a b*tch sometimes. I won't deny that I'm judgmental, and there's a long list.

- smokers are top on that list. My mother and grandmother died of lung cancer and I'm uber judgemental of people who still smoke and who say "oh, it doesnt kill you" (I have a co-worker like this)

- the financial stuff like Kmerey and Stella said - I have a friend who'll only buy designer stuff and spends thousands of dollars on clothes and wouldn't even THINK to stoop and by something from Express or a non-Nordstrom brand - she once showed me a picture of a $300 blazer and was like ISN'T THIS A GOOD DEAL. I was like I could buy a whole new ward drobe for $300...

- people who complain, complain, complain but don't do anything about it. I work with this one girl who's gained 30 lbs. And that's all she complains about. But does she change the way she eats? No. Does she exercise? No.

There are a lot of other things that I don't say out loud because I realize they're mean and that I shouldn't voice these things. But god they're there. And I hate that. HATEHATEHATE it.

But, like Icon, I can be too forgiving of some people to the point where I can be a human doormat. I guess I have an equal balance?

I really am a nice person...:)

I am definitely judgmental as well!

I have an old friend who is unemployed, has 3 kids, lives in her parents basement with her husband who couldn't get a job so her dad hired him. She owns more designer things than I do, and I have quite a bit of disposable income. Her (and her mother) get credit cards, max them out and never pay them off. She's on her second car, her first one was repo'ed!

Cheap people, I have people who on a daily basis will fight with me for 20 cents off!!

Certain poor people, the ones who don't clean their houses, or take care of themselves and who don't get jobs because welfare exists.

People who think they are better than everyone else, because clearly they are not.

I think thats all I can think of right now.. :lol:

sharon - I have no concept of correct grammar in English, I went to an all french school, so mine is probably pretty bad!

-Aimee

I am super judgmental of people who buy things they can't afford. (There's actually a pretty funny SNL skit about a debt reduction book called "Don't Buy Things You Can't Afford") Credit cards are perhaps at once the best and worst invention ever. I worked with a company in West Virginia that helped to repair and fix up people's houses who couldn't afford renovations of their own. One of the families I worked for had a TV and cable. In NO way is TV a necessity. It drove me crazy that they wouldn't pay for repairs to their damaged ceilings (water dripped in throughout the house) but continued to pay for cable and electricity for the TV!

I don't think I'm particularly judgmental unless it's something that I consider to be extreme or if it's something that people do over and over again... I get really irritated!

I don't have a problem with people being unemployed, but I can't stand people who can't be bothered to get a job and are unemployed just to abuse the welfare system and get their benefits.

Designer clothes don't really bother me either and I can understand why a lot of people buy them, I would never personally only get designers but it's down to the person. The only reason I ever get annoyed is when they can't afford the designer lifestyle, they're walking around with a £1000 Ballenciaga bag , £200 Chanel sunglasses, £150 7 jeans and £50,000 debt on credit cards.

I don't mind smoking either unless the person is smoking weed, and it doesn't bother me for them to smoke it every so often but when it's almost every day it makes me wonder what's wrong with the person. Only because people who smoke all the time complain about being broke and not being able to see their friends when it's because they're smoking a few joints a day! grrr

Oh and lastly, girls who prioritise men they're seeing over their friends, especially when it's guys who come in the girls life for about a week or 2 and then go away and never come back. I know a girl who drops me and our other good friend the minute she meets a man, and the worst thing is we're her closest friends.

Not trying to casue a fight or ruin anyones fun, so PLEASE dont take this the wrong way!!! :)
"Who am I to JUDGE or STRIKE YOU down??""
I am no better than anyone else, and ive made some pretty poor choices in my life, and i have no right to look down on anyone else....
Just food for thought....

Haha, SwimGirl, I suppose that's a reasonable excuse! ;D

See, I COMPLETELY agree with you - which is why I try not to "voice" my judgements - I keep quiet about them. But I still have them, and that's the part I don't like.

I think I'm pretty judgemental.... sad but true.

I hate seeing people who live above their needs.

I hate seeing people on welfare, especially if they're buying something. In my head I'm going "why the F### are you wasting money on that?"

I think food stamps is rediculous. My roommate gets over 600 dollars a month in food stamps for her and her two kids.

I hate dead beat parents who don't pay child support, yet go out and blow money on tattoos, cigerattes, and other wanton things.

there's more but i don't want to make any more enemies. lol

This thread has made me realize shamefully how judgemental I am myself.

I'm an Early Childhood Educator and i'm very judgemental about peoples parenting skills or there lackof.

I despise smoking.

I hate seeing people have poor priorities in life....partying/smoking/doing drugs/wasting money but can't keep a job to save their life or always looking for handouts...my sibling and bf's sibling for one.

Heck....sad to say but sometimes I've even judged people on how they look. They may appear 'snotty', 'stuck up', 'athletic' etc...when they may not really be at all. I'm sure there's times when we're all guilty of this...I try my best to not do this.

mkroyer- I totally agree with you... for the most part. I am all for lack of judgement on certain things, that really only affect the person doing it. For example, lots of y'all seem to have mentioned judging smoking. IF smoking only affected the person doing it, I don't think it's anyone's right to judge. BUT it doesn't just affect that person. It affects everyone who has to be near them, and breathe the same gross air. AND it affects anyone who has health insurance because costs grow higher and higher with the more insurance has to pay for. Those costs are definitely not just absorbed by smokers, they're absorbed by everyone who is paying. I guess that's where I get my judgement from.

:O now i dont know if i am judgemental or not about somethings. I really dont like people who smoke around bus stops, air vents (-__-), under no-smoking signs...I dont know if I judge them or not, it just really hacks me off that they could be giving me a chunk of their cancer. Well, the entire building is getting a piece of their cancer if they smoke under airducts (which smokers at my uni tend to do -_-)

And I dont like people who are lazy or undriven, but since i really dont like that quality I dont surround myself with those kinds of people, i just :censored: about them to other people of the same mind set as me xD I guess I judge people based on that...but if they are too lazy to ever turn up to something on time, when other people travel further and work a longer and harder day before hand and manage it, but they "need" a nap after a 6 hour day or something, is it really judgemental to say they are lazy? techincally it IS making a judgement....but its true :P

My thing with smoking is it never just affects the person doing it - there's the second hand smoke argument, which fine, but there's also the "smoker developing cancer, family having to take care of them and suffer, insurance having to pay, etc. etc."

Truth be told I get more irritated at the family aspect of that from personal experience. I asked my mom to quit smoking for years and she was like I DON'T WANT TO then she got lung cancer and subsequently died, so excuse my bitterness on *that* one.

Drivers! I am INCREDIBLY judgemental of how other people drive, even though I do a lot of the things that p*** me off. I guess I am a driving hypocrite

I am a judgmental person. I cannot even attempt to deny this. Here are a few of mine (there are many):
~ I hate people who do not take care of their children and let them run wild. I worked retail for years and saw this constantly. Mommy and daddy would ignore little Timmy while he screamed and ran through the store destroying things. Then they would be horrified and throw a fit when I explained that they were responsible for paying for the $400 lamp that little Timmy hurled against a wall. I know where Timmy got it from.
~ People who take said ill behaved young to events and activities that are NOT for children. Your toddler does NOT need to go to the midnight showing of Texas Chainsaw Massacre with you. Also, your six year old should not have come to a bachelorette party. Really.
~ People who do not need government assistance, but choose to take it instead of working.
~ People who feel free to sit around in public and air their sexist, racist, etc. B.S. If you are a racist jerk, please feel free not to share.
~ Members of ANY religion who feel the need to save me by shoving their views down my throat and telling me that I am going to go to **** because I a) wore a skirt, b) wore pants, c) own makeup, d) am not married, e) am educated, f) whatever. Also, if you feel the need to stand on a street corner in the middle of the bar district in my town holding a sign that tells everyone on earth that they are going to burn for all time, please F off. Feel free to contemplate my eternal damnation from further away.

Those are some of the BIG ones.

Paradoxx I SO love your last one......arghh..I live RIGHT next door to one Religious building......I don't even think they call it a church.I won't go into details about what Religion it is.....and I swear they LIVE there..eat/ sleep/breathe there...sometimes I think they don't work ( all times of day)....bf always wants to go over as a joke to see what its all about but I wouldn't DARE...they would never leave us alone after!

Ms Paradoxx:
:rofl:

SO TOTALLY there...

Kira

sharon - why thank you! :)

I wonder if it's so terrible to be judgmental? I met this girl a long time ago, I just got a bad feeling, and didn't want to be around her. I gave myself a little lecture about being too judgmental and decided to open my mind and become friends with her. Wow, I wish I could say she proved me wrong. She once told me that if her and I ever stopped being friends that she would key my car beyond repair. I wish I'd listened to my first judgment.

-Aimee

OMG thats terrible. I hope your not still friends with her, and that she didn't key your car.

I try not to be in any way judgmental. I mean, it wont get me anywhere, but i think everyone is to some degree.

I will admit, it irritates me when people use the gov. for support, and then go out and buy stupid crap. things that really aren't right, and people do anyways.

and girls that need too much attention and try to get it in the wrong kinds of way. I don't think i judge them as harshly as I would someone else, but I still do, and I feel sorry for them.

Thank you! I'm glad I'm not the only crazy judgmental person out there.

I guess I'm very judgmental because I try to make smart choices. I don't smoke, I don't do drugs, and I don't rely on the govt for things like food stamps. I don't want to hear people complain about the price of cigarettes going up. I've actually said to these people "you ever think about quitting?" And they act as though it's not even an option. And I agree with the religion thing as well. Practice what you preach. Don't go on and on about "praise Jesus" and what not when you are lying, cheating, and or stealing. I could go on and on.....

I started this topic because of this- I had an on again off again friend who jumped into a relationship with my guy friend. I told her to come with me to my yearly gyno appt because she should start seeing one as well. For one- she's 25 and every woman should see one. Also, she should get on the pill because she didn't want a child, nor was she in a healthy place for one. Needless to say, she got pregnant and we stopped talking. I was extremely disappointed in her and him. We initially stopped talking because when I heard the news, I didn't have anything nice to say, and I knew that nasty judgmental side would come out. So I thought it would be best to keep my mouth shout and step away. Well, I found out yesterday that she suffered a miscarriage but they want to try again for another!! Wait a second- she admitted to someone that being pregnant was what was keeping them together and now you want to try again!! They've only been together since January.

I'm sorry I rambled..... but we are in our 20s now. It's time to grow up and make smart choices!!

I'll ramble more later....... need to go to sleep and now I think I'm not making sense anymore lol

:lol: i feel you on this one! i once had some one come up to me at uni and ask to complete their questionnaire. Knowing how hard it is to get participants for research i agreed, it turned out to be a religious beliefs/how "godly" you are questionnaire. I completed it and handed it back- to my surprise they then went on to go through my answers with me and try to convert me to whatever religion they were advocating! Well, since they wanted a discussion about god they got one and lets just say they didnt have all the answers to my questions, and it ended with me telling them to go read their bible :p Honestly, they drive me nuts the most. I dont mind doing questionnaires, and i dont mind people saying "hey, do you have time to talk to me about God/religion/beliefs?" but when they use their questionnaires to sneakily open up something like that it really gets my goat

This happened to me at college too! They just stood there, aghast, and I was like don't mess with someone who's had religious education hammered into their head since they were 5 years old if you don't REALLY know your stuff. Thankyouverymuch.

I probably am judgemental, i have been told that i "dont suffer fools gladly". Who the **** suffers fools gladly?

mkroyer LOVE the TOOL reference!! I agree with your comment whole heartedly, but unfortunately I am a bit judgmental. In fact, lately, I have been thinking about how my judgments may spur from jealously. Reading this post has really reiterated that. When I stop and look at the issues that I am so damned judgmental about, I do realize that I make mistakes too. I have A LOT of faults and can easily be judged by others as well. As MJK says “What is this but my reflection? Who am I to judge or strike you down?”