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-   -   Avoiding emotional eating in the midst of a breakup (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/20-somethings/176036-avoiding-emotional-eating-midst-breakup.html)

bronte155 07-06-2009 11:17 AM

Avoiding emotional eating in the midst of a breakup
 
So my big errand to run this morning is taking the mail I'd been collecting for him over to my now ex-boyfriend's apartment and leaving it on his table--I won't be seeing him, since he's out of town, but still, I'm feeling so anxious that I have the urge to eat everything in sight first!

I am proud to say that I ate a healthy breakfast instead and got my workout in, so I can hopefully feel fit and amazing as I complete this errand instead of like a fat lump he's better off without. I might even wear a sundress! (I know, it'll make no difference to HIM, but it will for me!)

I can't believe, though, that even after working out and everything, I'm STILL feeling tempted by the possibility of stopping by the grocery store on my way there to get some candy or doughnuts or something...even thinking, "I deserve a treat, this is going to make me so sad!" Old habits die so hard!!!!

bronte155 07-06-2009 12:51 PM

All right, I went over and survived the experience without the help of any junk food. About to have a healthy lunch!

kiramira 07-06-2009 12:52 PM

:carrot: :carrot: :carrot:

Kira

sprklemajik 07-06-2009 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bronte155 (Post 2815064)
All right, I went over and survived the experience without the help of any junk food. About to have a healthy lunch!

Way to go!!! Congrats on staying strong.

beerab 07-06-2009 01:35 PM

IMO you should put "return to sender not at this address" and send it right back! Don't know how long you have been broken up but it's easy for him to go to the post office (OR do it online) and have his mail forwarded to his new residence till he changes his address for bills and stuff.

garstar 07-06-2009 02:33 PM

I agree with bee. Don't let him take advantage of you!

I don't know if anyone else has recommended this to you or not yet - but this book saved me after a bad break up, and it's advice has stuck with me in my current relationship, life changing. Better Single then Sorry. Give it a read, it's amazing!

bronte155 07-06-2009 03:06 PM

Thanks, everyone! We've only been broken up for a week, so this was mail I had collected for him earlier in the summer--we weren't living together, I was just picking up his mail while he was out of town so he'd know about anything important that came to his apartment. He knows he needs to make other arrangements now. (I don't know why he didn't just arrange to have his mail forwarded to where he's working this summer, I guess that would have been too easy!)

Garstar, I'll definitely look for that book, thanks for the suggestion!

SweetScrumptious 07-06-2009 06:03 PM

Good job for avoiding the grocery store! Just remember this feeling for when you are tempted next :)

Sorry about the break up, I just recently broke up with my ex (2 weeks ago now)

Iconised Ghost 07-06-2009 06:26 PM

Well done! I was going to say dont take any money or eftpos cards with you, then you cant buy anything, but it seems like you were strong enough :D

bronte155 07-07-2009 11:12 AM

Thanks for the sympathy, SweetScrumptious! One of my friends "helpfully" told me that he's back on the dating site where we met and has updated his profile (a week after ending our relationship of almost two years!), so I'm now trying to channel my negative emotions into "Well, then, let's be as awesome as possible to show him!" Not a great fix for the long-term, but it will do for now. :lol:

And thank you, Iconised Ghost! Leaving my money would have been a good idea!

amyleigh 07-07-2009 12:50 PM

bronte-i'm on that 'let's be awesome journey' too. i broke up 4 weeks ago after almost 3 years. we can take that awesome trip together. whenever i have those moments where all i want to do is shove food in my face, i do yoga. it calms me down to a meditative state and i don't think about it. it also gives me the extra umph i need to say no to the food. if you need to talk, i'm here...goin through the same thing

SweetScrumptious 07-07-2009 04:56 PM

Quote:

Thanks for the sympathy, SweetScrumptious! One of my friends "helpfully" told me that he's back on the dating site where we met and has updated his profile (a week after ending our relationship of almost two years!), so I'm now trying to channel my negative emotions into "Well, then, let's be as awesome as possible to show him!" Not a great fix for the long-term, but it will do for now.
Um... are you me?

We dated for 1 1/2 years, met on a dating site. The very NEXT day after we broke up, he updated his profile and is back on the dating scene... Granted, I broke up with him... but really? That soon to start looking? Obviously I didn't have an impact on him at all...

wow.

harrismm 07-07-2009 05:44 PM

Jeeze.Maybe you two were dating the same guy!?!?!? Just kidding.Take care, both of you.

bronte155 07-07-2009 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by amyleigh (Post 2816703)
bronte-i'm on that 'let's be awesome journey' too. i broke up 4 weeks ago after almost 3 years. we can take that awesome trip together.

Thanks...I'm sorry anyone has to be on this trip with me, but it is nice to have support! :hug: Yoga is a good idea, I'll have to dig out my DVDs and give it a try. I'll have to see him at the end of the summer to give back his apartment key, so I guess my "awesome" goal at the moment is to look amazing and resist the urge to hurl the key at his head. Yoga might help me capture that calm!

Quote:

Originally Posted by SweetScrumptious (Post 2817039)
Um... are you me?

We dated for 1 1/2 years, met on a dating site. The very NEXT day after we broke up, he updated his profile and is back on the dating scene... Granted, I broke up with him... but really? That soon to start looking? Obviously I didn't have an impact on him at all...

wow.

Ugh, I feel exactly the same way! I know intellectually that being on a dating site doesn't mean much other than that his pride is hurt and probably that he's bored, but it certainly feels like he's saying, "You're easily replaced." Especially since he ignored the e-mail I sent him over the weekend pouring my heart out (I know, I know, but the breakup was mutual, we both said we felt really conflicted at the time, and he had sent me a text saying he thought we'd made a mistake! I thought he would at least lend me a sympathetic ear when I told him how hard all this is. I guess I missed the magic 48 hour window during which he was still in the process of getting over me.)

Anyway, again, I'm sorry that you've been through something similar, but I appreciate knowing that I'm not alone. :hug:

joyinSF 07-08-2009 06:21 PM

hey sweetie, how are you doing? breakups are TOUGH!!!! one thing that helped me was reading "its called a breakup because its broken."

when me and my ex broke up, i gained ten pounds within a month. I ate whatever i wanted, that included ice cream, brownies, all that bad ish.

i never thought id get over my ex (he cheated on me like crazy) but i did and now im happy with my current bf.


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