boy problems
 

Ok so, last year fall term my math class was taught by a pre-ph-d grad student. I had a huge crush on him. I didn't see him after fall term was over but I still thought about him sometimes. I'm 7 weeks into the new year here, and all of a sudden I've seen him 3 times this week. Now I can't stop thinking about him, its like my infatuation with him doubled.

Meanwhile, my boyfriend is two hours away, and hasn't been very attentive lately. When I say that he doesn't pay enough attention to me, he comes up with all these lame excuses.

I think I just want some male attention and that's why I've been so infatuated with my math teacher. I was even thinking about purposely taking my next math class with him. I know that I shouldn't pursue that, and I don't plan to. But I just...ugh I don't know what to do. I don't want to think about him anymore and I just wish my boyfriend would stop being an idiot.

Sounds like you need to have a serious talk with your boyfriend. If he won't listen to your feelings...then why is he your boyfriend?

Well we've been together for over a year, and this whole no attention thing has only been the last couple weeks. But still.:?:

Well the reason is pretty legitimate, he started his own business a couple months back. It has been picking up the last couple weeks, and he's the only one there right now so that has been keeping him busy.

He is a complete work-aholic and he's only 21. That's something I've been worrying about for awhile.

I have the opposite problem: my boyfriend is a complete bum..he only works like 30 hours or less a month. And then he never has money to do anything, go out or buy me anything (not that I am a hungry money wench, but we've been together 3 years and he never buys me anything!!!)

I am the one thats the workaholic and my bf is the one you can't get off the couch. In you're bf's defense, I love love love to work. I love knowing I"m working towards something to better not only my future but the future of my family. My bf doesn't understand how I'd ever make it through 15 hour days but its all about what I want to achieve and accomplishing my goals in life. I've always been guilty of having a great work ethic, you either have it or you don't. Although its not a good excuse to not give you the attention you need and deserve, maybe he's thinking farther out than you are. Like maybe if he does this now- when you are closer he can be with you.

I may be wrong but thats my 2 cents.

i was exactly the same as kelli and i ended up ending my relationship. It wasnt fair on my bf to not give him the attention he wanted. Of course, there were other problems in the relationship too, that wasnt the only thing. You should talk to him, see whats going on :)

Whatever you do, don't take the math-boy's class! It will be much easier to seduce and sleep with him if there are no pesky authority issues or teacher/student boundaries to contend with.

:devil::devil::devil:

Or if he's bad in bed there won't be that awkwardness of having to see him a few times a week because he's your teacher. lol :D

But you see, if I take his class I can get to know him better. THEN seduce him after term is over :devil:

I think this convo doubled in awesomeness once the word "seduce" arose.

What could possibly go wrong here? :lol:

True - and you could have him all to yourself during office hours!

I'm all for you seducing him at some point. Nerds are hot AND generally very grateful for female attention. It's a good combination!

I know!! I am always attracted to the nerds. The best guys are the ones that don't know they're good looking!

If you decide that you're going to seduce him after term, you'll probably know which way your relationship goes too :)

I think... you should weigh out the reality of it. He's a teacher, and you need to get a good grade. Will it effect you at all? What if things do work out, it's a bad idea to date someone who is teaching you, kind of in relation to having your mom teach you - just get's weird. Also, how long will the crush last, you think it'll last an entire semester (or whatever)?

It's a tough situation!

I have never had boyfriend who did much of anything, I'd love to find someone with a work ethic like my own. It's tough when he's not there for you, but tell him how you feel - see if there's anything you guys can do to fix the problem. talk talk talk talk talk ! :)

I really wish you the best in whatever you decide to do, AND I hope your bf stops being an idiot, but either way... it sure is fun to discuss the possibilities on this thread, no? ;)

About 3.5 (while I was still in college) years ago I was dating a guy that I was with for almost 3 years and I met someone else and developed a HUGE crush that just didn't seem to go away. I thought to myself..."If I'm in this long term relationship then why do I seem to have a huge crush on someone"? I decided to explore that some and decided that I didn't want to be with my current boyfriend and starting dating the crush. Now we are happily married.

I was in the same kind of situation. My boyfriend at the time was an hour from me and we didn't see each other much...and we were kind of having some problems, too. Are you having problems with your current man?
If you really can't seem to get this crush out of your head, maybe give it a shot. He might end up being your soul mate, like mine was!

Yes, I can see where you are all coming from even if I don't want to admit it. To be honest, I've been worried about our relationship for awhile. The thing that makes it really hard for me is that he is my first love, the only guy I've ever even kissed. I mean, we've even talked about living together eventually and getting married. Which I guess was pretty naive. I think I should have a talk with him about our relationship.:(

DRose,

Thats never an easy or a fun talk. As someone who is 6 time zones away from her boyfriend, having a coming to God talk was very helpful. He wasn't being attentive enough from that far away, and that is so hard. I feel for you, but you have to decide whether you want to make the commitment to making it work or want to take a break. Thats for you only to decide..

This thread is awesome! I have been with my BF for 5.5 years. We did break up for a year b/c he was sucking but now he is fantastic. We live almost 4 hours apart but it is going great.

When I was in college, I hooked up with another guy when I was with my current BF. I had a crush and I couldn't say no. Anyway, I think you should go for it. I "dated" (haha i think you know what i mean) a lot in college before I met my BF and I dont regret a single thing. I had a blast and met all kinds of guys. Just do what feels right.
Go for it!

Well, based on what you said on the other thread, at least you know that any new crush probably has nothing to do with the guy and everything to do with something about you. I started to post there thinking I was on this thread.


Quote:
Originally Posted by DRose
Another thing, whenever I have a male grad student teach one of my classes I end up having a crush on him. Even now, I hated my new teacher for the first 6 weeks, he isn't even good looking. But I can tell I'm developing a crush

Ok well since this turned into a nerd convo. I totally waited on this super cute ultra nerdy guy last night. He was very good looking but had a button up white shirt on with slacks and glasses and then to top it off he had a calculator and a pen in his front pocket. After I saw that I was like NO WAY@!!! Then I talked the guy into having 2 long islands(what can I say he was by himself with a calculator, the guy NEEDED a drink). needless to say I didn't hit on him or anything but when a guy doesn't even look you in the eye when you are talking to him BOO. lol.
Anyways bout the teach...i say just have some good dreams and enjoy! Dont take the class lol it just provokes feelings