Frustrated and lacking focus
 

Hi everyone. I'm new here and I am trying to figure out the best way to get started on my weight loss. I've never been this heavy in my life and I feel like my weight has absolutely taken over everything. I can't think about anything else, but still, I can't seem to do anything about it. I don't want to go out and be around people, because I feel so uncomfortable in my own skin. But then I'm paranoid people don't want to be friends with me because they think I'm gross. I've become crazy paranoid that people are always looking at me, and judging me. Nothing fits me right and I'm exhausted all of the time. :(

I've lost weight in the past using WW Flex, but I'm currently working abroad, and nutrition information is hard to find. WW Core scares me a bit too much. I just want to find something easy to stick with, that won't be so limiting that I get frustrated. haha, I mean, I'm sure that is what everyone wants. I'm just really tired of being miserable about my buddy. I'm turning 28 in February and I would really like to be happy with my body on my birthday, for once.

Thanks for letting me vent. I'm not really sure how most of you use these forums, but I have to say, you all have been a great source of inspiration for me to try and get motivated. I only hope one of these days that motivation sticks!

I have said it a million times, I'm sure. But I have been lacking serious motivation until recently, when I found 3FC and saw the threads about Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred. I bought it for $12 at Wal Mart and I have been doing it since, I've seen results and I completely owe that DVD the fact that I've been more conscious of what I've been eating, I've been more aware of the calories I'm taking in and what I"m burning, and I've lost inches all over my body (And I have only done it for 12 days!!)
There are a lot of women who just need that little something to get the mojo flowing, for me it was finding a workout I could commit to *20 minutes a day! * and that there is a group of women here supporting me through it.

Hopefully you can find something that works for you, and who knows? Maybe it's the 30 day shred! :) Any bit of exercise will get you more motivated, just remember to keep moving.


PS My birthday is january 28th and I'm trying to lose 15 pounds by then. You can do it! Just putting in the effort to workout more and eat healthier has already improved my self image, even if I'm not to a goal by any means. Keep your chin up! :)

Thank you so much DisgruntledOne and carcar05 for your responses. I think I needed to get it all out, and I'm happy I found 3FC. I don't have a whole lot of support over here, and being lonely definitely doesn't help the situation!

I'm abroad for two years for work. I'm only about 3 months in, and I'm sure my issues adjusting are playing a major role in this whole thing. I'm really intrigued by the Jillian Michaels videos. If only it didn't take 6 weeks for things to get shipped over here! maybe I'll try to see if there is another way I can find it.

I also want to do the Couch to the 5k, but have had issues running outside here. People aren't the friendliest about it, and running is not really part of the culture. I guess I need to stop letting these be excuses and just find a way to make it happen!

Do you guys usually check in here at the forums every day?

Calorie counting is a simple way to achieve weight loss. Log onto a calorie calculator, enter your age, height, weight, etc. and presto. It will tell you how many calories YOUR body needs every day to maintain --- then adjust down to create a 500-1000 calorie deficit each day, and you will get a safe, steady loss of between one and two pounds a week -- generally any faster is not considered safe.

Then there are a lot of sites that will help you figure out the calories in the things you eat. Calorieking.com, Fitday.com, dailyplate.com, etc. Just make sure you stay above around 1200 calories a day to get the nutrition you need, emphasize protein intake to protect your lean muscle mass, and do some reading both on these forums and on other nutritionally related sites to make sure your body is being appropriately fueled.

I grew up mostly overseas, the child of a US diplomat, so I know that a number of cultures are not so friendly to women running about in public. Brisk walking is an option. Exercise videos. Jumping rope in place. Strength training at home, including push ups, crunches, squats, leg lifts, etc. Stationary bike? ****, closing the blinds and just dancing to your Ipod for 30 minutes.

This can be done...even with culture shock, alone in a foreign culture. You can do this! Good luck!

Welcome to the forums!

You sound like you're having a hard time. Adjusting abroad, knowing little people, being heavy... I'm feeling for you! You have taken the step "I want to do something about my weight." This is very important... if you do not really want it it will be very hard to stick to losing. The next step is starting. I wouldn't worry too much about exact calories. There are a lot of websites where you can find the calorie values for items. Even if they're from another brand, it will be approximately accurate. If you eat a lot of fresh things it's even easier, because you'll know exactly what's in it. I also found that I have a pretty good eye for putting food in categories "I can eat a lot of these" "These are OK for every now and then" and "These are only for special occasions". You might too; you never know :).

Fitness video's are a great thing. You can do them in the comfort of your own home, no matter how stupid you may look, and you don't need many special equipment to start with it. A lot of people here do Jillian Michaels, but maybe you can pick up something else from a local vendor until the DVD arrives? 6 weeks?!? In what remote corner of the world are you locked up :P. It is also quite easy to come by JM's dvd by downloading it, using a torrent. You need to be aware that this is illegal though (the downloading is not, but while you download you offer the content to other users, and this is illegal). (I don't even know if we're allowed to talk about this in the forums...)

Good luck, you can do it! Just make sure to educate yourself well before you start, and that you have a good plan. This makes going on easier.

Thank you guys for all of your suggestions! Even just hearing feedback is helping me and my resolve. It is like, if I say it enough times, that I'm going to do this, lose the weight once and for all, it might even come true!

I'm going to try the calorie counting. My problem has always been portion control, not with food choices. I think I was using the WW point system as a crutch. I know what to eat, I just need to be better about how much I eat! and learning to stop when I'm full...I cook a lot, so I guess I will have to banish the butter and start measuring things out!

Another thing that seems to be helping me is that all the scales are in kg here, and not lbs. For some reason it makes it a little less daunting to step on the scale. Wanting to lose 17 kg seems somehow more possible than almost 40lbs! That sounds silly but scales can be scary! ha...

I have the opposite problem - I know what I *should* be eating, I just have a hard time making myself do it! Portion control is easier for me.

I want to second what everyone else has said about exercise. For me, exercise is absolutely key. It motivates me to eat well (because I don't want to "eat back" all the calories I burn working out), and I just feel so much better, mentally and physically.

You can do it! :hug: :hug: :hug:

If you don't mind my asking, what country are you living in?

Thanks Jaclyn! I'm just getting settled in Italy right now. I had been in the Middle East previously, and then Germany. My job is sending me around to several different branches and I'll spend 6 months in each. I thought Italy would be easier, but not so far :( I did manage to obtain a copy of the Jillian Michaels video though, so hopefully that will stick!

if you just read some of the threads on the 30 day shred, it seems like such a good idea. i don't have a copy yet, but i'm seriously considering getting one. even though workout videos always make me feel kind of cheesy and i know my boyfriend is just going to sit around and laugh at me doing it by myself.

but hey, it must be exciting to get to see so many different places! i love to travel, i want your job!

Thanks aml! I do love my job, I just wish I was taking more opportunities to go out and experience these places! rather than hiding out at work and home. Hopefully if I start exercise that will give me back some of the confidence I need to get out there! I'm pretty sure my bf will mock me, but then ooops how can I help it if my sneaker goes flying off and hits him in the face ;)