is it disrespectful (guy related)?
 

If you hook up with a guy you know, does he owe you a phone call. Is it disrespectful to not give you one. just FYI we are both in college together. Plus we kissed/made out once before this and I gave him a hard time about not calling me over that. This time we made out, got to second base, he slept over and was just a sweetheard all night. Its been a week and I haven't heard from him. It was a great night, we had some great conversations, I was really expecting to hear from him. I kind of take it as a slap in the face that he didn't call. I mean he doesn't have to ask me out on a date or anything, just give me a heads up to show that he respects me. A "did you find your earing, you doing alright, or something casual like that would suffice. A text would even do.

am I reading too much into this or do I have a right to feel disrespected.

he's just not that into you.

If he was, he'd call. It's completely disrespectful. He's an a** for leading you on.

Sorry to be so blunt.

Never understood that "guy must call" thing. Did you ask him to call you this time? On a certain day?

I don't think it's disrespectful persay, I just think he wanted different things than you do.

Have you called or texted him?

Personally, I think it's disrespectful. If he was into you I think he would have called by now. It sucks I know... but it happens to the best of us. :hug:

Originally Posted by dkneec19:
he's just not that into you.

If he was, he'd call.

Sorry. But it's true. Don't hate me.

He's an a** for leading you on.

I pretty much knew this. It just sucks because I really like him, haven't liked anyone as much as I like him in awhile. It was a great time just chillin with him that night. It just sucks when you like someone and they don't like you back. oh well, plenty of fish in the sea, if not him someone better right.

Originally Posted by dkneec19:
he's just not that into you.

If he was, he'd call.

Sorry. But it's true. Don't hate me.

He's an a** for leading you on.

unfortunately I have to agree. Some guys just aren't into the calling thing, and it can be ok depending on the situation. But you said you made it clear last time that you wanted a call, and if he was interested in a friendship or doing anything with you again, i think a call (or, as you said, even a text) should have come your way.

Some guys are just dense and awkward... faerie also has a point in asking if you contacted him. It's always worth a try if you think he's a decent guy at heart.

Originally Posted by Faerie:
Never understood that "guy must call" thing. Did you ask him to call you this time? On a certain day?

I don't think it's disrespectful persay, I just think he wanted different things than you do.

Have you called or texted him?

nope, and I wont. I'm just wondering how I should act next time I see him. I think I'll just let him come up to me if he wants to be polite, but remember that he disrespected me.

Originally Posted by Scarlett:
nope, and I wont. I'm just wondering how I should act next time I see him. I think I'll just let him come up to me if he wants to be polite, but remember that he disrespected me.

I'm the sort of person who enjoys making the moments more awkward. I'd put him on the spot and ask him "Hey, why didn't you call me?" Let him fumble for some excuse. Then I'd probably laugh and say "Well, I won't ever forget that you didn't respect me enough to be upfront about what you want, or didn't want."

But, once again... I enjoy making moments more awkward. So take that with a grain of salt. :lol:

haha thanks. I might say something alone the lines of "hey remember that time we hooked up and you didn't call"

also on a positive note. this whole situation has given me the kick in the butt
I needed to get back on plan. I had been trying to get going again for the last2-3 weeks but just couldn't string more than a few days together. I was practically perfect on SBD phase 1, had little urge to even eat since this happened. I lost 6 pounds in a week and am now in the 180's for the first time in months. It's kind of motivating me because I want to knock him out next time I see him. Funny how guy troubles motivate you to stick to plan.

Guy problems totally motivate me.

Me and my bf of 3 years split last year, and it totally kicked me into gear!

I got a new hair style, started exercising more, eating healthy, I was totally motivated. GO WITH IT!

Obviously he doesn't deserve you.

Originally Posted by Scarlett:
nope, and I wont. I'm just wondering how I should act next time I see him. I think I'll just let him come up to me if he wants to be polite, but remember that he disrespected me.

you should maybe try and call him. this is 2008, exactly what you are feeling now could be the same thoughts he is feeling about you not contacting him?

i agree, i dont get why its disrespectful that he didnt call you, but its not disrespectful that YOU didnt call HIM. He's obviously uncomfortable calling you, or he just doesnt think about it. Or he's just using you.

I have to agree with the others, he just wasn't that in to you. I know it hurts, but I am positive there is someone way better and more interested... Just keep being the best you, that you can be :hug:

I have to agree with a few of the other girls - I don't personally see it as disrespectful if they guy doesn't call me after a hookup....lord knows I did enough of the "pash and dash" a few years ago. Heh, I'd never have expected ANY of those guys to call me the next day! They were purely spur of the moment.

Sometimes we just want more than another person is willing or ready to give and yeah it sucks but there isn't much we can do about it.

I also agree with the comment that you COULD call him yourself...I don't think its really fair in this day and age to expect the guy to make all the moves. After all, we women are more than capable of showing we're interested ;)

If youfeel disrespected by him not calling you I believe he has as much right to feel disrespected by you for not calling/contacting him. But thats just my humble opinion.