Man...reading all of these makes me sad. People are jerks. :(

I guess for me, it was more of an unintentional remark I wasn't supposed to see. My freshman year of college, my printer wasn't working and my roommate said I could get on her laptop to print my paper. She had a recent IM conversation with her boy of the moment, and before I clicked out of it, I saw my name, which made me curious. She'd been talking about how hungry she was, and had taken my cookies. And then said that it wasn't like I needed them, to which the guy replied something stupid like "LOL what a fat ***." Jerks, both of them.

There are countless times for me, I have been overweight since I was around 7. I have blocked several out, but I would like to share a few that still haunt me because I have kept them bottled up so long.

About 3 years ago I was working as a cashier. I had just had a severe case of esophagitis and had missed 3 weeks of work. An older guy asked where I had been, so I told him about my illness, and part of it was that I was not able to eat and had been dropping 3 pounds a day. His response was "It's too bad you didn't stay sick, you could stand to lose a lot more." Then he continued standing there as if I should keep talking to him. I was crushed and just turned my back until he left.

In 7th grade, I was sitting in class and it was pretty silent because everyone was doing homework. A guy said "I smell bacon. ...Is Beth on fire?" It was made 10 times worse when I realized the teacher was laughing harder than anyone. The kid wasn't punished in any way.

to join the vent wagon there are a few things
i will start with the most recent

at the beach being picked last for a soccer team - first off, I was the one who brought the ball and I know it was because they prob thought i was out of shape - though I'm sure I was more in shape than any of them. (even though soccer is not my game it still sucked :))

last summer a 12 year old on a the set of a short film, in front of a hot actor, called me fat then talked about my fat. and maybe something like losing it.

last summer in Jordan I got made fun of by this jordanian man in Petra - he actually made me cry - listen - I've never gotten the baby due line - and I don't look my weight most of the time - so the fact that he literally made me cry and hate my trip there was awful. I can't remember quite what he said - but I think i posted it last year - but it was something along the lines of no man will love you - you need to lose weight to be loved - etc.

and then one of my names shortened means fat in another (common) language - try living with that thought. yes it became a nickname at one point in middle school by my "so" called best friend (then) (soon to be ex-bf) who is now as big as a house (ok - just a lot bigger than me) (so ha!).

Being put on a diet at 12 - the susan power way. Denying to this day to anyone in person that I ever went to a fat camp for a few weeks when I was 15.

I'm sure there are more - but what I hate about myself is that I feel the need to tell people I do workout - I do compete in races (triathalons) (marathons, etc) - to make myself feel better - so people don't think i'm a lazy slob - so they realize I am in physically good condition. but URG - I try not to do it and then the words slip out.

OHMYGOD, I did the exact same! I thought everyone was so stupid, because, yes, it only took a few minutes to do... slow lazy kids. LOL. See, most people are idiots.. ;)

ROCK ON, good JOB! HA! I, too, have been driven to succeed because of past experiences. Right now, I may not be COMPLETELY satisfied with my life compared to what I had while thin and a full time performing artist, BUT most of the kids who picked on me once NOW still live with their parents, dropped out of college, got into drugs, or are just plain deadbeats. Middle school and high school really were the best years of their life :eek: It feels kind of nice to know that I'm MUCH more accomplished than they are now... having people doubt me when I was younger has largely contributed to my being such a determined person now :D

You know, I really do wonder why some people are really so rude and mean - not just towards fat people, but towards the people they choose to ridicule. Is all that REALLY just insecurity?

I've never gotten the urge to insult anyone unless they've done me wrong. Sure, I make all kinds of judgments about people in my head (and I own up to it - we ALL judge, whether we mean to or not), but I keep them to myself. I don't trash talk anyone unless I find him or her to be a really despicable person.

As I said in a previous post, I'm friendly towards everyone. Yes, I DO think the general populus is largely composed of idiots, but I actually give everyone a chance to prove otherwise. ;)

I tend to lurk more on the forum than post but I just felt I had to post after reading everyone’s stories. Mine actually happened back this winter. I was out at a bar with my girlfriends and my friend’s brother came with his friend (whom I don’t particularly like because he thinks he’s God’s gift to the world, but that’s beside the point). The two boys were there with their girlfriends and we were talking to them being friendly while my friend was talking to her brother and his friend. When we were leaving getting into a cab the friend threw snow at us and yelled to me “You’re ugly and fat, and you’re going to die alone!” I was crushed, no one had ever said anything so hurtful to me in my entire life. It was like someone was pointing out all of the worst things I’ve thought about myself and shouting them for the world to hear. I cried for hours while my friends tried to console me telling me he was just drunk and he’s always a jerk. The next day he called my friend to apologize for making a scene and explained that his girlfriend said that Kate (who is my frien's roommate that was with us) said something about how she was ugly and he thought she was talking about me, Katie. Regardless though he wasn’t apologizing to me and even though it wasn’t me talking about his girlfriend he still said those increadibly hurtful words to me.

Flutterby :hug:

Thanks for sharing your story, for every callous idiot in the world there are thousands of nice folks that would never even think anything like that, never mind spew it out to hurt someone.

Glad you are here at 3FC!

I really haven't gotten it as bad as some people I suppose.

In middle school, I probably only weighed 150 which I would love to be now, but at the time I felt like a giant. A friend of mine once was lifting up me and my desk with his feet from behind and when I asked him what he was doing, he responded, "Exercise." He probably didn't mean it like he said it, but I was really upset.

In early high school, I went to my subdivision pool with my brother. There were a couple of the neighborhood prostitot middle schoolers there. One of them said as my brother and I were leaving, "Wow! I didn't know they allowed whales in the pool." I was really upset but my little brother was so angry that he covered their bikes with mud. I suppose that's not THAT big of a deal, but he's normally not the type to do anything.

My senior year of high school, I got stuck taking earth science which was basically for borderline mentally challenged people. Well... maybe not, but they certainly seemed like it! A good friend of mine was in there and we were discussing colleges when it turned out that he was applying to some of the same schools and same areas as me (which was odd- if you didn't go to Ga Tech or UGA at my school, you went to a community college. Nobody went out of state to school- especially not to New England). We would spend a lot of time talking about it. In the end, we chose 2 different schools about a mile apart from each other in the same time. After we went back to our in class projects, one of his parters said loudly, "You better watch it bud, once you go fat you can never go back." I was absolutely mortified. Not to mention the guy who said it was quite portly himself.

I've had the typical people yelling out their car windows and such. I was sitting with a friend who was also overweight one night in a convenience store supermart waiting for a friend to come back with waters when these two guys carrying 2 12 packs of beer a piece called us fat and ugly as they walked by. I swore I thought my friend was going to ram them with the car. "My insurance doesn't cover PMS!" :P

Not directed at me, but this one guy on my hall last year was just dumb. My roommate was a good 60 pounds larger than me and awaiting gastric bypass. This guy made all kinds of passes about her weight. He definitely didn't mean them in a bad way but it kept happening and he would continue talking as if nothing was wrong while EVERYONE IN THE ROOM's jaws would drop. The one thing I specifically remember was my roomie talking about how she blew an a cappella audition. The guy said, "That's reason surprising because you're such a big girl and you have so much more lung power!" Ignoring how that defies the logic of anatomy, it was just a really rude thing to say. But in his mind, it was just ok. And not to be stereotypical, but that's not something you'd expect from a gay guy...

Oh!! I forgot one. I had a different cashier job than the one mentioned above and was checking out a middle aged buy when he asked me if I knew where he could guy a boat. I had no idea. It's a small town and I don't do any boating... I told him no. He rolled his eyes at me, a little time passed and he said "Do you know where I can find food? Like is there a grocery store like Hy-Vee here?" I responded with "Yes, there is one just down the street." He looked at me with one of the meanest looks I've seen and said "Yeah, I figured your fat *** would know where that was" and walked off.

...

Wow, no one has ever made mean or rude comment about my weight, even when I weighed 250. I realize that it's unlikely it never happened and more likely that I just never heard it but thank god! It makes me feel terrible that you all had to go through this crap! I suppose in my case ignorance was bliss.

I'm so sorry you guys had to go through that. It's just painful for me to read.

At my highest weight my mother once said to me, "Maybe you should lose weight so you can get a boyfriend." I felt so angry and hurt by that comment because this is coming from my mother! She should be loving and supporting me not making ugly comments like that. Well, now I'm 22 and still have never had a boyfriend so I'm starting to believe she might be right. :(

Hey Canary -
Don't believe it! I didn't get a serious boyfriend till I was 23. and he was my first boyfriend - ok And I haven't had a serious one since we split up when I was 25 - but Still. He was hot and thin and had an accent - took care of me and didn't care about my weight. And other guys have always liked my curves (some). I may have been about 10 pounds lighter then than what my ticker says - but whatever. It's all about meeting the right guy - someone you feel comfortable with and like. It's great when it happens. and it was unexpected!

Canarysong, I was 22 when I had my first real boyfriend.... he's out there somewhere! you'll find him, he'll find you. :)

Haha, I remember that trend...

One of my best friends in high school fit into the "fashion frenzy" gay male stererotype. I thought he was great until he called me a cow. But he himself was pencil thin and he always cared for being thin, which was always in fashion I guess... for him at least...

Oh, he must be bored with all the free time that women don't care to spend with him. Insecurities... they eventually rise to the surface....


The same guys that called me fat had to offer me sandwiches the next year after I lost a lot of weight. I was in the library all the time and one day I came back to my seat only to find a wrapped turkey sandwich with my name on it.