Here we go...again!

  • Ok, so I joined this site a number of months ago and was really good about posting when I needed to get a boost of support and was evening PMing with someone fairly consistently. Then I let life get in the way, excuses followed, and well we all know the rest of the story. Last night I was talking with my fiance and realized something very interesting. This may turn into a longer than meant to thread but I figure if there is any place where people want to hear others' stories it's here. Anyway, this last week I asked Ryan (fiance) what one thing about my appearance he would like to see different. Mind you, this man has repeatedly said to me, "please don't think you have to lose weight for me, if you want to that's fine, but I love you the way you are and think you are beautiful and sexy" Yes I know, I know, I'm the luckiest girl in the world. Anyway, in lieu of our upcoming wedding in October of this year my friend recommended a book called the Power of a Positive Wife, and it covers all different areas of marriage. One of those is your "outter wrapping" or your body. Now, the author is not saying your husband ONLY loves you for your body, but let's be honest, men are visual creatures and we as women should try to look our best for our husbands. So, in light of that chapter I asked the above question to Ryan. Well, he is a "leg man" and loves mine, so he said he would like to see me wear skirts and dresses more often. In fact he said since we've been together he thinks he's only seen me in such a handful of times, maybe 10 at the most (we've been together about 2 1/2 years). Now, like I said, he loves me the way I am and I could start doing that now and he would be happy. However, I would not be because I don't like the way I look or feel in those items of clothing. I don't like the way skirts and dresses hug to my stomach and I hate the way my inner thighs rub together when I walk, it's a very uncomfortable feeling. This led me to an interesting conclusion: I thought that wanting to lose weight for myself and be healthy for myself would be motivation enough for me to want to really change my life style and in effect lose weight. However, I have found that I give up on myself and my dreams way too much (working on that in other area of live as well) and for some reason it's easier to let up on what needs to be a strict regiment of diet and exercise. However, knowing what my future hubby wants and what it will take to give it to him in a way that we will BOTH be happy, motivates me more than anything else. I want to make him happy, to give him something he wants. When I shared these thoughts with him I assured him that I know he is not asking me to lose weight, but I also let him know why losing weight will enable me to more freely WANT to wear skirts and dresses. I myself have thought I would love to wear them more, I want to feel more femine and cute, but I just don't at the size I am. So with all that said (whew! that's a lot ) I am ready once AGAIN to really do this. As far as food goes, I'm doing the 1950's housewife with Monday being chicken night, Tuesday fish, Wednesday casserole (you get the idea) that way I know what I'm making and what I'm eating and can control the portions and calories so much more easily. I'm sure I will evolve my meals (especially when I am married and can live at the place where I cook) but for now the more simplistic I can make it, the better. Also, I plan on getting exercise on Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Wednesday, and Thurday (I have a cleaning job on Fridays that I'm sure I will be burning a lot of calories at!) Also I have decided that if friends want to get together with me, instead of going out to lunch and eating things I shouldn't, I'll schedule exercise dates with them. I think I would be (and hopefully my friends would to) be so much more satisfied with ourselves if we spent money (or saved it really) doing something active, whether that's walking/running at a track and talking, or even finding a class we can take for just one night, one fee for a new experience together. I want to become a fanatic! I want to be thin! I want to FEEL sexy for my honey, not just have him try to convince me I am. I'm ready to do this! Anyway, thanks for listening to my rant. Well, maybe not rant, but you know what I mean. It just feel so good to get this out and receive support and encouragement from all your wonderful gals (and men) out there in cyberland. Thanks again. You'll be seeing my ticker move quick, I KNOW I can do this.
  • Welcome back and good luck with your endeavors.

    I know how it feels to have a fiancee who is totally fine with your weight..it makes me so much less motivated to get the weight off because I know he doesn't care either way.

    I finally just had to put my foot down because I am not happy with myself.
  • I must have been away too when you were posting, but nonetheless, welcome back!
  • Think of as improving your health, looking better and wearing skirts and dresses is a bonus.
  • Congrats on coming back, and wanting to lose the weight. You can do it!