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Old 11-25-2007, 10:57 PM   #1  
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Talking Sexy Chicks - Beautiful women losing weight and forming friendships 11/26/07

Welcome to Sexy Chicks!
We are a support group started by a few newbies who were looking for serious diet buddies. We are here to support and encourage each other on our weight loss journeys, and to remind each other that we are already beautiful people. We are different in many ways, but we are all willing to stick by each other through this challenging process. Anyone who is committed to weight loss and is looking for support (and also willing to give it!) is welcome to join!
Our bios are stickied in Misc. Clubs here:
http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=125796
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Old 11-25-2007, 11:24 PM   #2  
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thanksgiving is over but my fridge is still stuffed with delicious treats. i won't lie to my friends... i binged on leftovers tonight. oh well, tomorrow's another day. no worries.

i felt like i ate enough on thursday to gain back everything i lost. but i didn't feel bad at all! because if i've learned anything in the last few weeks, it's that one (or two ) bad days won't totally reverse my progress. the times that i have cheated on my "diet" haven't actually made me gain any weight back. it has slowed my progress down, but honestly i don't want to lose the weight faster if it means i have to be miserable the entire time. i love food and can't survive on only "healthy stuff" the rest of my life. so if eating all my favorites on a special day means i won't quite make it to my monthly goal this time, i can live with that. i had a really guilt-free holiday

i'm so proud of all of you who had self-control on the holidays! good job! you rock!!! and for those with less self-control like myself, keep trying! we can all do this!!!

so here's a question for my sexychicks - how do you all decide what your ultimate goal should be? i looked at what the healthy range for my height was (which is something along the lines of 120 to 140-something) and decided on the higher end (140). but sometimes i wonder if i should be aiming lower or higher. i'm scared to aim for 120 cuz i'm afraid i won't make it and i'll hate myself for it. plus i don't even know if i would like myself at that weight. the last time i weighed 140 was when i was about 14 yrs old (i'm 28 now). i can't remember what it's like to be 120
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Old 11-26-2007, 07:41 AM   #3  
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I feel the same way. I eat what I want but in moderation. I don't do without a thing. I am not much of a sweets person, never have been and I sure think fast food is about yucky. I do love my mountain dew and as you know lol have my " mountain dew " time at least once a week. Never going to do without it. I can't cheat on my " Rennie " plan because everything is in my plan lol. I say ok between 1200 and 1400 calories but that is, as I have said before, a lose plan. I may have a day that is 2100 calories then have another that is 1100. It all averages out in the wash. I still have, on an average of 1200. I didn't get fat in a day. It wasn't to much turkey or to much of this or that. Well, ok it was to much meds but nothing I could do about that lol. I eat in moderation AND I am not as likely to let the docs put me on every med they want these days. Never again am I going to let them chub me up almost 80lbs because they say I have to take something. I make them give a reason now more than just well it will help. I investigate medications on line and talk to my pharmacist, who is just a wealth of information. More than once I have make them change a medication over the last 6 months to something else that isn't going to cause as much weight gain. I have become smarter and in more control of what goes into my body and that means more than just food.

I picked 120 because that is what I always weighed before all the meds and the weight gain. Weighted that from about age 23 before I had my child son until I got very very sick for many years in a row just a few years ago. I looked great and felt good about how I looked too. Who knows, that might not be thin enough now. Hubby doesn't want me under 135 so we shall see. YES, it is important I look good for him too.

Last edited by Shy Moment; 11-26-2007 at 08:48 AM.
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Old 11-26-2007, 07:41 AM   #4  
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Gooooooood Morning Sexy Chicas! :sunshine:

A beautiful (uh rainy...) Monday morning! A new week with new possibilities. It's past the long holiday weekend, so back into some healthy routines.

Lola, that's exactly the attitude to have. Our thin & healthy counterparts don't always deny themselves "unhealthy" foods. They have them occasionally, not often, and then make up for them. If changing my life meant never being able to eat pumpkin pie again... well then this ain't gonna happen!

As for your question: I think I picked mine the wrong way ^^ My healthy weight range is like 130 - 169. I picked a number in the middle. However, I'm VERY far away from that number, so what will happen is that as I get within 20-30 pounds of where I'm going to be spending the rest of my life I'll reaccess or reaffirm. I just needed to pick a number to shoot for in the long run so that I can have something there at the end, and not just a big "?".

For you, 140 sounds like a fine number. You were only 14 and not fully grown at that time so you may find that 140 fits your body best now. But, I know that there's nothing wrong with getting to 140, realizing that it's not your fit and going five pounds at a time down to find your right "fit".

Now that I'm thinking about it, I may do something similar. Start with 169 and try to maintain there for a few weeks to see how it feels. *shrug* We'll see when I get there a year and a half from now!
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Old 11-26-2007, 10:19 AM   #5  
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Hi everyone!

Well another weekend gone by, I feel like I just started it and its over!

I had a good weigh in and lost almost 2 pounds this week so I was happy! I may get back down to my 50 pound weight loss yet! Then I just have to start all over again from there.......

countrygirl that is the right attitude you are still doing good and to be honest right now I am having two cheat days a week, I know getting closer to christmas and being out alot over the weekend, I can't stick to my diet as strictly during the week so I give myself a break over the weekends. I am still losing weight maybe not as much as I can be but I am still losing. Like you said you might not make your monthly goal but really its a goal you set yourself, you are trying, you may not make it one month but you might be under the next!

As for my goal I have always had in my mind 150, I don't know why, I probably could be less in weight but that is my goal for now.

I hope you are both doing well Shy and Faerie!!
Take care
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Old 11-26-2007, 02:01 PM   #6  
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Good Morning Ladies ~

Shy ~ OMG... you crack me up!! and NO the voices don't tell me that. I'll have enough of my own snow to shovel through as we live in the freakin' snow belt and get dumped on regularly but nice try. LOL

ShimmeringSun ~ Awesome job on the 2 lbs!! Especially a holiday week. It doesn't matter how fast we lose... it's not a race afterall. Just keep up the good work and BTW... 2 lbs. in a week is fantastic!!

Faerie ~ Good to see you hun... hope you're doing well. Thanks for all your support!!

Lola ~ I picked my goal weight for two reasons.... Well, first of all, I weighed 128 when I got married, felt good, very healthy but I was very young and don't even aspire to be that thin again, nor do I need to. Just before getting pregnant I was 145 and still felt great and thought I still looked pretty good. Hubby loved it too (he prefers a little meat on the bones). So I picked 145 so I could be my Pre-pregnancy/pre-post partum depression with meds weight. The second reason I picked 145 is a cheesy reason but it's true nonetheless. If you look at the BMI (which I think is a joke BTW) 150 still has me overweight but 149 doesn't. I decided 145 gives me a buffer so I don't go through all this and then have it recorded somewhere by an MD or something that I'm overweight cuz of one lousy pound. Cheesy, I know but that's why I changed it from 150 down to 145.

Lola ~ Will post again in a little bit about your not feeling guilty on Thanksgiving!! That is awesome!!! good for you..

Gotta run ladies ~

Last edited by OneLastTime; 11-26-2007 at 02:02 PM.
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Old 11-26-2007, 04:03 PM   #7  
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Originally Posted by countrygirl7902 View Post
the times that i have cheated on my "diet" haven't actually made me gain any weight back. it has slowed my progress down, but honestly i don't want to lose the weight faster if it means i have to be miserable the entire time. i love food and can't survive on only "healthy stuff" the rest of my life. so if eating all my favorites on a special day means i won't quite make it to my monthly goal this time, i can live with that. i had a really guilt-free holiday
OK Ladies ~ This seems to be the most fitting place for me to post a little more about myself. First of all, Lola, you expressed yourself so well in this part of your post. I couldn't have said it better myself. I was trying to figure out a way to explain to you ladies how I felt on Thanksgiving this year and then BOOM... there it was... you wrote exactly how I felt.

I want to share with all of you WHY my weight loss journey is actually working this time unlike the many attempts before. Almost two years ago, smack in the middle of Christmas and New Years my 19 year old niece went to the doctor as she had a couple days of fever and some swollen glands in her neck. They admitted her right from the doctor's office and a day later was diagnosed with Cancer. Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma, Stage 4 (for those of you who don't know, it's the worst stage). It was everywhere... growing very aggressively. I know you aren't supposed to have favorites but she is my favorite niece... also my godchild. She was a great kid, high honor roll cuz she busted her butt for it, no smoking, no drugs, an occasional wine cooler, supportive boyfriend. Not that anyone deserves it but she was such a good kid....

Anyway... she underwent a couple weeks of chemo where she got it every day followed by 52 weeks of chemo. No, that wasn't a typo. 52 friggin' weeks of chemo. She turned 20 along countless blood transfusions, infections, hair loss, major weight gain from the steriods, monster chemo headaches, throwing up constantly, in the hospital more than out, home on IV's, etc. This young lady smiled through all of it showing such incredible strength and bravery. Her friends and boyfriend were incredible.... staying in on Friday nights with her to have pizza and movies rather than be out like most college kids would.

Anyway... I gained a lot of weight through 2006 as I was on the road A LOT. They live in Buffalo, I live in Syracuse and her treatments were in Rochester (half way between our cities). That meant a lot of drive thru eating. Can you say "Do you want fries with that?" ugh. I was at every doctor appt., every scan, every chemo, etc. to support my niece and my sister, her hubby and other niece so that was a lot of fries!!

In January 2007 she got scanned and we got the good news: NO MORE CANCER. Gone.

In February/March she fell and was having back pain. Thinking the pain was due to the fall she started seeing a chiropractor. Her bloodwork and exams were still "normal" as far as any recurring cancer goes. She continued with normal exams and bloodwork through April but in May came down with a high fever again so the doctor ordered a PET scan immediately to look for cancer.

Now, mid-May my Mother ended up in the hospital with a "cardiac event". Not quite a heart attack but something going on with changes on the EKG. This started a series of "almost heart attacks, but not quite" whatever the **** that means. In the hospital, out of the hospital, tests, biopsies, angiogram, stent, more biopsies. Something not quite right according to MD's... hmmmm.

Thursday, May 31 my niece has her PET scan.
Thursday, May 31 my mom calls and tells me her biopsies are back... she has cancer. Cancer of Unknown Primary... Stage 4.
Friday, June 1st my niece calls me. Her cancer has returned. Apparently the back pain was from a tumor growing all this time. Grew so aggressively in her spine it shattered one of her vertebrae. So she not only has cancer but a broken back.

I kick into "OK... what are we gonna do about this?" mode. Go to all the appointments now for my Mom and my niece. I should remind you all, I'm a nurse so that really helped them as I could relay the medical terms to my family in words they understood. More time on the road... more drive thru....more fries.

A couple weeks later we learn my niece will be having a stem cell transplant as her only hope. I learn, from talking to the MD on my own, that my Mom has less than a year to live. 4-6 months without chemo, double that with chemo. Guess who gets to tell Mom?? Me. Guess who gets to tell all my siblings? Me.

At this point I'm on the road making it to these tests and appointments. When I'm home I'm either at work or spending precious time with my daughter or hubby. The weight of the world is on my shoulders but I don't feel like it can be any other way. Daughter still has a life to lead... play practice, piano lessons, school, etc. I have to be there for everyone.... I want to be.

Wednesday, July 11th. I come home from work and start crying. I climb in bed and cry. I can't stop. I'm having anxiety, I'm sobbing, I can't even force a smile for my daughter when she comes in the room. All I can think is "I don't want to do this." "I can't do this." Now, to get my hubby to take the day off from work is like parting the red sea... but... he took off the next two days to stay home with me. I couldn't stop crying for THREE days. Didn't shower, didn't get out of bed, didn't eat, would fall asleep and wake up in a panic sobbing, didn't take phone calls, etc. Hubby MADE me get out of bed... we went to the movies. Now, I'm a psychiatric nurse for the love of God, I know the right things to do but it's not so easy when it's you. So I agreed... went to the movies and to dinner after. I sobbed through both, have no idea what the movie was about and didn't eat my dinner. Went home and climbed back in bed. This was the end of day 3 and this is when the shift happened. I went from being depressed about my mom and niece and crying over them to internalizing everything toward myself. My self esteem dropping, apologizing to hubby for being so needy and crying so much, apologizing for not being there for my daughter, apologizing for not being strong enough to handle this, etc. I was spiraling downward quickly. I know this pattern from going through my post partum depression and it scared the **** out of me. Now I've been taking a very lose dose antidepressant since my post partum so that night I called my MD and increased the dose. I slept.

The next morning I went out and sat on my deck and made a life altering decision. I can't do anything about the fact that my niece has to have a stem cell transplant. I can't do anything about my mother dying. Both are going to happen whether I stay in bed or not. What I CAN do is take care of me. I made the decision that morning that I have to come out "OK" on the other side of all this. That is the only choice I have and the only one I have any control over. Yes, what is happening to my mother and my niece suck and the double whammy of it all is incredible but I have a husband and a 12 year old little girl that need me and I have a lot of friends who are truly willing to help out in any way if I just let them.

So I started to let them by calling and leaning on them. Some days I leaned pretty hard, too. I started seeing my therapist again to talk things out, kept taking the new dose of meds, started eating healthy choices, started watching my portion sizes and started going to the gym to work out my feelings in a positive way. AND I called all my siblings and told them that I'm not the only one who can sit and watch chemo drip into our Mother... they all need to get their butts to the hospital and sit with Mom, too!!

Here we are... 4 months later... My niece had her stem cell transplant... it was very difficult for her... she made it!! She had surgery on her back to fix the shattered vertebrae... They took one of her ribs, did a bone graft from her pelvis, built the vertebrae, put a metal cage around it with screws and pins and she's slowly getting better and is CANCER FREE once again. My Mom has had several chemo treatments, many blood transfusions, the sickness, etc. but is doing well. She's not as sick as she thought she would be, just very, very tired. She takes a long nap every afternoon and is still able to enjoy herself in the mornings and evenings. We have had some great conversations and I learned some things I wouldn't have learned had we not had this time. Certain conversations you just don't have unless you know you're running out of time and I'm grateful for those conversations. AND I've lost 32 pounds and still going strong. Choosing to do the weight loss right now and focusing on it is what will get me through.

OK... back to Thanksgiving and what Lola said originally. Due to my niece and my mother's cancers, EVERYONE came home for Thanksgiving from all over the USA. We had a great day with every sibling, spouse, grandchild, niece, nephew, enjoyed each other, took lots of pictures. There was no way in **** I was going to "diet" on that day. I had one day with them... all of them and could very well be the last one we ALL have together.

When Lola said "but honestly i don't want to lose the weight faster if it means i have to be miserable the entire time", was exactly how I felt. I enjoyed my family, I ate, I didn't care and I don't feel bad. I haven't lost site of my need to come out of this whole journey "OK" but it is certainly ok to put it aside sometimes and simply enjoy life.

Ladies, I didn't mean for this to be so incredibly long. Thank you so much for listening to me. I'm grateful to have each of you to share this weight loss journey with so we can support each other along the way. You are, WE are, all truly amazing.
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Old 11-26-2007, 06:46 PM   #8  
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You have been thru so much. I am so glad you have come thru it all with such a bright and cheerful attitude. I keep telling people. We didn't get fat in a day we aren't going to lose it in a day. One meal didn't make us fat, one meal isn't going to put all the weight back on. We rush thru life so fast, well many do, I am always in turtle mode lol, that we don't see what we have. I am glad things are going better for your family members. You are a wealth of support. I will keep them all in my prayers that things keep going well. I live just on the fringe of the snow belt. You are more use to shoveling snow than I am...what do men say... if you loved me.....hehehehehe. Sent you a pm
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Old 11-26-2007, 11:05 PM   #9  
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Thanks for the advice and encouragement, ladies!

Shimmering good job on the 2 pound loss!

OneLastTime THANK YOU for sharing with us. don't apologize for it being long. i am so glad that you feel like you can be open with us, and i hope that sharing helps you as you deal with such a stressful time in your life. you are such a strong person to be able to lift yourself up out of the pit (which is what i called it when i got that depressed) and deal with all of this in a healthy way. and that's great you got to be with your entire family for the holiday!

have a great night sexychicks! talk to ya tomorrow!
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Old 11-27-2007, 07:00 AM   #10  
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OLT - Hey chicky. You're going through a very trying time. It would be difficult for anyone. And I echo Lola when I say "Thank you", and yes, don't apologize. The length of a story is of no concern.

Also:

Quote:
Both are going to happen whether I stay in bed or not. What I CAN do is take care of me. I made the decision that morning that I have to come out "OK" on the other side of all this. That is the only choice I have and the only one I have any control over.
Exactly. This is exactly how I feel about life in general, and sadly too often forget. That it's not what happens to us or around us, but what we do about it and how we act about it. We can only control one person. I personally think it's wonderful that being mindful about your food has helped keep you centered.

Again, I'm sorry that you've had so much stress. My thoughts are with your family.

Last edited by Lovely; 11-27-2007 at 07:04 AM.
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Old 11-27-2007, 07:24 AM   #11  
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Tuesday Mornings... Ordinary Tuesday morning. Here at work thinking about all the work I have to do. Notice I'm thinking about it. Not quite getting much done atm.

Congrats on those 2 lbs Shimmering!

Last night I took a good hour long walk on the treadmill. It's kind of strange, because I went for the walk just to relieve stress. Usually just thinking about exercise causes stress. It was nice to be moving and just watching Judge Judy (Hush, it's one of my guilty pleasures ^.^)

So how goes everyone's holiday shopping? I've got everyone's calendars. I buy everyone in my family a calendar as kind of a gift topper, that and a little bit of gourmet chocolate... who can't use a calendar? Or gourmet chocolate? (But none for you, Shy, I know you'd prefer 'Dew candies if they were ever made.) I still have to get their "main" presents. We don't do anything big, I have a larger than average immediate family, but we like to exchange small gifts with eachother Christmas Eve. And eat cookies. Yes, in fact, more importantly we like to eat cookies.

I can't help it, after Thanksgiving my thoughts turn to warm Christmas memories. Kind of embarassing. What are you all doing for the upcoming holiday? I'm not even sure everyone here celebrates a holiday in December, but if you do, has your mind wandered over to thoughts of it? If you don't, how's your "soon to be winter" season?

Later, ladies!

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Old 11-27-2007, 07:48 AM   #12  
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Hi everyone,

Happy Tuesday!

OneLastTime that has been quite a time you have been through in the past little while and for you to make it into a positive for you is even better. Good for you and I am glad to hear things are starting to look up for your niece

Shy........turtle mode...that is the best mode to be!

Faerie I hear you I am at work right now also and I decided yesterday was my last day of overtime, thats enough of that!
An hour on the treadmill that is awesome, hey watching tv while you are on it helps you stay on longer don't you think? Unfortunately my guilty pleasure would be "A Shot at Love with Tia Tequila" or something stupid like that
I am almost done shopping thank god, I hate crowds and how crazy rude people get closer to christmas so I try and get alot of it done in November.

For my christmas holiday my sister and her boys come to my parents house (I still live there they can't get rid of me) and we have a well basically a junk food christmas eve dinner, yes its the best part of christmas eve! Then they stay overnight as my sister is a single parent so she says its nicer to have everyone around when the boys see what Santa brought. Christmas morning my brother and his wife come over and we have christmas brunch, open presents and then sit around for the afternoon. Then of course christmas dinner. Hey I am seeing a pattern here there is alot of eating in my story

Anyways I have decided to do my best up until my weigh in on December 15 then I am going to take a 2 week break as there is no way I can make it through christmas and not eat all the yummy food, then right after New Years back to normal.

Did I put anyone to sleep with my post?!

Take care!
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Old 11-27-2007, 11:54 AM   #13  
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Sounds like a great holiday to me. Nothing wrong with a little eating. We didn't get fat in a day. Just eat one instead of two lol. No more two for me one for you lol. Everyone likes a little time and a half but sometimes enough is enough.

Faerie
You are just to funny " dew candies " ohhhhhh do they make them. Is there a wonderful land somewhere far far away that everything is made from dew. Oh I want to live there so baddddddddddd. We belong to a couple of card clubs and then have the family so since many of his family are also in the card clubs. We have decided for just a gift exchange. We keep getting each others names in the gift exchange for the card clubs anyway lol. Funny how that has happened year after year. Sure makes things a lot cheaper and we also set a price limit so we can get even nicer presents. One year I got a diamond bracelet because my name was picked 3 times, family gift exchange and both card club gift exchanges by the same person Now there are just 8of us. Close family and friends that join in this gift exchange. I know what I am getting hehehe. I saw this picture at an antique shop and oh how I wanted it. I was there with some friends and this one friend has my name lol. I went back to get the picture and the woman said some man came in and bought it the day after I was there. He was so excited because he said his friend really really really wanted it and he had no idea what to get her This will be my 4th picture from antique shops.
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Old 11-27-2007, 12:32 PM   #14  
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Shimmering - For me Christmas Eve is the one night of the year where no "diet" could stop me. Heck, wild horses couldn't stop me! I've decided to plan around that night for our cookies & candy & junk food dinner, too! I think it's awesome that you've realized those 2 weeks out of the year are yours to enjoy to their fullest.

Just don't forget to keep posting! We love reading your posts even if we're all going to be sitting here jealously thinking about all the goodies you're eating And don't forget to be back to your good ol' habits (I love how you said "normal" because truly this is now our norm.) after your 2 weeks are up!

Shy - They make root beer candies... they must have mountain dew flavored candies somewhere! Hrm. I did find a link to a list of soda flavored candies. I wonder if any of them taste anything like dew. Sorry, no Dew-specific yet! http://candyaddict.com/blog/2005/12/21/cola-candy/

You already know what your present is?! >_< Isn't that cheating? Reminds me that my family has a tradition of giving a "clue" with the gift so we take time to let the person try to guess what their present is before they open it. Some of them have gotten ridiculously difficult! We always joke that if they guess right they've been "cheating"
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Old 11-27-2007, 01:27 PM   #15  
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I wasn't suppose to know. The woman told me about the man buying it. She had no idea it was for me lol.
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