I screwed up and I can't believe it!
It all started because I decide to get on that scale in the middle of the week and noticed it went up a pound. I was plenty mad but thought of 100 reasons why it could have been and went about my day. The next morning (knowing that I shouldn't have..) I got on that damn scale again I was sure it would back down that pound and hey, maybe even more! Wouldn't you know, not only wasn't it down that pound but it was up ANOTHER pound.
There are no words to describe how I felt. I couldn't understand it. I read here all the time about people "going off it" for the day and perhaps gaining a pound or 2 after that but I have been good! It made me feel automatically like all this for nothing. If my weight could fluctuate like this for no good reason I better consider lowering my target weight to have a few extra pounds to play around with. So anyway, of course today I'm feeling sorry for myself and decided to have a piece of wholewheat toast for breakfast. Then I went grocery shopping and decided to bake a cake (for my kids of course
) and I was thinking, as I was checking out, "am I unconsciously doing this because I'm going to gobble it down tonight with a big glass of milk?" No, No of course not! well, I made the cake stuck my finger in the can of icing for a taste and now I have to go in there and ice the cake. part of me feels like I already screwed up so what the ****? On Atkins they say one taste of the wrong thing is the kiss of death, So does it really matter if it's a piece of toast and taste of icing or, that and a nice piece of cake and glass of milk? OR - should I get up, go to the kitchen and dump the whole damn thing in the garbage right now? I suppose the correct answer is go in there, ice the cake, give a slice to my kids and get over it! But, do I have it in me today? I just don't know. I was at least able to walk away and come on line to write this. It's not really a post I?m kind of using it as my conscious ( and confessional!) Well, It's been a few minutes now, I feel better, maybe I just needed to remove myself from the situation. But I'm afraid to go into the kitchen for that monster awaits me!
And all this because I got on the scale when I wasn't suppose to.
By the way, does this means starting ketosis all over again with headaches and all?