[cinnamonspice]

Yesterday my hubby, kids and I went out to dinner. Of course hubby (being the sensitive man he is lol) wanted to go to the all you can eat Chinese Buffet. Well we went. And all I got was a salad off of the bar. Yep, a tiny measly salad. I didn't even cheat and get crutons or regular dressing. I was so proud. Hubby kept looking at me with this evil look, finally he said " shew I just wish you would eat. One decent meal won't hurt you, you are being ridiculous".

I know some people can cheat once or twice and be fine. Not me. I think I'm like an alcoholic or drug addict when it comes to food. One huge meal leads to two, two leads to eating everything in site.

So even though hubby wasn't proud, in fact he was annoyed with me, I'm very proud of myself for resisting all of that great smelling food. Yay me!

[da fat n da furious]

yes YAY you! there are not too many people who can resist the temptation,,,and having someone there trying to push you into temptation,,,you should be veryproud.

[Liliann]

That's a major victory alright and you ought to be proud of yourself. Bravo on just eating salad and not overdo it with the other foods. I am proud of you on making a healthy choice in a fast food place.. Keep it going!!

[lumifan4ever]

that is awesome!! good for you. He should be proud of you two, but he was probably looking on the practical side of the cost of that salad. but he should have known better taking you someplace that you would want to over eat at. He should be proud of you for sticking to your determination to eat healthy and lose weight. That was a very big victory for you!!!

[annk]

I think that's a HUGE victory! I am just like you when it comes to not being able to cheat just a little bit; one meal definitely leads to more! And I think it will get easier and easier each time you make smart choices. WAY TO GO; that's really great.

Ann

[Yoyonomore]

Thank God for my chinese buffet! They have this wonderful thing called Mongolian Grill and I can get a fantastically healthy meal with nothing but meat and veggies. You should see if they have one in your area! I just leave out noodles and rice and mow the good food. :-)

And great job.

Karma

[kayleystar]

That's GREAT! It can be hard, especially when people are pressuring you to eat...or even just bragging about how they can eat something, and you can't! LOL!

[MorticiaAddams]

Thats awsome. You know yourself and your limits and your keeping yourself honest. Thats so great.
Thats exactly the changes you should be making for yourself. Not letting someone talk yourself into giving in. BRAVO BRAVO

[AquaChick]

Originally Posted by cinnamonspice

shew I just wish you would eat. One decent meal won't hurt you, you are being ridiculous".

I think I'm like an alcoholic or drug addict when it comes to food. One huge meal leads to two, two leads to eating everything in site.

My mother is notorious for using that exact phrase. I have come to the conclusion that she is overweight and doesn't feel good about herself when she sees me trying to lose weight. I used to weigh 110 pounds- which on my frame is fine. It drove her crazy, and her behavior about the whole thing is annoying to me and makes me want to go "HA! I refuse to eat that burger and now I lost 10 pounds, now what?" bwhahahahahaha

Me too. If I don't give it up for good I will eventually binge on garbage and be back to square one.

[PhatPhoenix]

I think the attitudes of the people around us can be a real help or hindrance.

My DH is supportive of me - no probs, but I have noticed that my neice - who is only 17 but probably needs to lose a good 50lb at least - is unable to do anything about her weight because everyone round her is unsupportive, especially my brother (her dad)! If she even tried to diet he would go on and on about her eating 'rabbit food', etc.

I used to have the same problem with my ex - he moaned about me being 'fat' (at that point I was a UK size 10, that's US 6) but if I tried to diet he'd go on and on about me being 'moody' when I dieted - even though I wasn't! Til it got to the stage where I just kept quiet.

I think some people (often men in particular) actually have something emotionally invested in us being overweight. There is a level (maybe subconscious) on which my brother doesn't want his daughter to be thinner than his wife, or to start getting male attention - so he keeps her where she is by speaking to her the way he does, if she wants to lose weight. Ditto my ex. He was a jealous Italian alpha male type - he knew I wasn't really fat but wanted to keep breaking me down so I wouldn't get confident/attractive - and potentially leave him! I realised he actually wanted me to be overweight. In the end he succeeded, making my life so miserable I comfort ate my way to being 40lbs overweight.

You have to ask yourself what it is he has emotionally invested in you NOT getting slimmer. Jealousy? Fear of losing you? Then do something about it - I'd tackle it head on by talking to him.

Well done for not giving in, but be careful as that attitude will wear you down like water on a stone.

[maegdaeien]

Isn't it weird how people can be so happy for you when you lose weight, but then worry about how you're doing it? I mean, it sounds like you're being totally healthy and reasonable (more so than me, anyway!), and people can't understand it. If you're going to be losing weight, you have to eat better and that does NOT automatically make you anorexic! You've lost an incredible 23 pounds-- does he think you're doing it on an ice cream diet? Nuh uh, gotta go for the salad.

I think you did great, too! I am incredibly impressed that you could be surrounded by egg rolls and cake and still stick to your guns. Go you!

[AquaChick]

So right on PhatPhoenix!!!!

You are right. Sometimes other people have there own personal emotions invested in our fat. Some hubbies think the wife will be more attractive to other males. Some mothers do not want to have daughters that look better to them... (eh, hemmm I think I made that case and point) Daddies don't want their babies to be overly sexually attractive. Yes, yes, yes. This is why it is important not to let the comments like this drag you down.

I will give you another example. I have several outfits in my old size. I picked out a few things and set them out where I can see them for inspiration. My husband says I can't leave the house in two of the tops I have because they are too flirty. SO NOT TRUE. They are just much cuter than my fat clothes. Then he says he is afraid I will not want him anymore when I get back to where I was and will run off with one of my male friends. Ridiculous. Yet at the same time he calls me ice cream but. (trying to be playful, but it is not nice).

The fat is a security blanket in some cases. My husband is older than me, so I think this is why he is afraid. Silliness and jealousy.

[cinnamonspice]

Thank you all so much for the encouragement. It feels so great to hear that I did good YAY me! I actually did something good!
As you can tell I don't get much encouragement at home. My family shares the same thinking "one meal won't hurt you, one candy bar won't hurt you" so it does make it harder.
Little do they know just how determined I am
Again thank you all so much. You all really inspire me to do well.

[Falon]

Congrats! On one hand, I call that potential sabatage, but on the other you handled it with grace! Frankly there is no such thing as a decent meal in a chinese place (unless they have a Mongolian grill as another person stated). This family that runs our favorite Chinese place we used to frequent was explaining to us that American Chinese food is not the same. Here they use lots of sugars, fry things more, and of course give the outrageous portions since that's what Americans are used to. They said they basically put sugar in everything but the rice.

Sorry, wasn't trying to dwell on Chinese food, but thought it was interesting non-the-less. Congrats again! Good job! He should be proud of your determination and not undermind it.

[blues4miles]

Amazing Cinnamonspice! My fiance is mostly supportive, but he does have those days too. Like "eating what you want one day won't kill you" or "skipping one day of exercise isn't the end of the world." I think part of it is, they are afraid to see us working too hard and would rather we eating what we want and lazing about as we'd like. That's totally awesome of you to resist his poorly thought out comment