[dragonwoman64]

Well, we're at the start of a new month. Thanksgiving month. The holiday season tends to get me worried about my eating. Maybe I need to concentrate more on the spirit of the season, than the goodies of the season. I'd like to have a plan set up ahead of time to make sure I do what's best for me, instead of indulging myself to no end, which is what part of me wants to do!

Robert and I cook Thanksgiving meal, so while that can give us more control, it also can lead to pitfalls. Yep, gonna have to have a talk with him about the best way to deal.

On the positive side, he didn't buy any Halloween candy. The bump this weekend was homemade chocolate birthday cake.

I have my TOM now too, Jill. Nothing like all that PMS to make life more Take it easy.

Amy, how cool you get to talk to a life coach. I'd love to do that.

This Friday it's going to be 70 DEGREES here! I want to be outside enjoying myself that day, let me tell you!!

Kimberley, where art thou? How are you doing? Thinking about you.

Have a good one, everybody.

[jillybean720]

I'm not sure what we're doing for Thanksgiving yet (heck, I don't know what I'm doing later today, let alone later this month!). I assume we'll spend it with Jeff's cousins (the ones he lived with) since we are flying up to CT to be with my family for Christmas. I've never had to share holidays before! I used to always either go home to CT or go to my sister's in Va Beach. We did spend Easter with Jeff's cousins last spring, but I couldn't give up my family OR my Jeff for Christmas, so I stayed with Jeff on Christmas Eve, opened presents with him (and his 2 older cousins and their 3 boys) on Christmas morning, then drove to Va Beach on Christmas day to meet up with my sister and my parents (who had driven down from CT). No more of that craziness this year--I am dragging Jef with me for Christmas!

For some reason, I seem to magically be losing weight again. I hovered in the same 3-pound range for nearly 3 months, and now that I am eating MORE calories, I seem to be doing better. I was certainly not staving myself before (ALWAYS had over 1200 calories a day), but I guess my body is just happier at this new level (averaging about 1800-1950 calories a day over the course of the week). No complaints here!

Jeez, I certainly could use a life coach right about now! I talked to my mother and sister yesterday about my *incident* with Jeff last week, and they both told me to just move on, but to keep my eyes open in the future (which was what I planned on doing, but it was nice to have some reassurance). They gave me this same advice from complete opposite points of view. My father apparently thought my mother cheated on him (with his own brother!) while he was in Germany in the Army back before they got married. They celebrate their 31st anniversary this month, yet apparently my father still sometimes brings it up, which is very hurtful to my mother since she never cheated! I don't want that to be us--I don't want it to still be in my head in 31 years, and I don't want Jeff to be frustrated and have to defend himself constantly for something he didn't do! My sister was married to a Navy guy, and he cheated on her a few times (never admitted it, but even his parents think he did!), so she has experienced my side, while my mother has more experienced Jeff's side. I wasn't going to talk to either my sister OR my mother about it all because I didn't really know how they would react, but now I'm really glad I did Of course, I still cried while discussing it with both of them (and then cried a little more with Jeff last night), but having such a great suport system will definitely help me to move on. As my sister said, "forgive, but don't forget"--let it go, but learn from it

[SwimGirl]

Goodmorning!! It's POURING rain here, yuck. I was watching the weather and looks like we are going to be hit with storm after storm for the next COUPLE weeks! I hate the rain, I hate the gloomy-ness. I have even resorted to getting my brother to bring me 5HTP, I know there are bad things said about it.. but they take away my winter depressions!

Marge - I am so happy to have you back, I missed you SO much during the summer!! In the spirit of thanksgiving, I'm greatful for my american counterpart! So how are you going to deal with the upcoming season of eating? Well, you have to start with breakfast, if you are on top of eating healthy meals consistantly, those little "treats" won't budget your weight. Of course, I had garlic bread, cracks and some candy for breakfast. Like "berries", heh.

Jill - I have gone thru the cheating thing countless times, and it turned me into a cold heartless b*tch. But I learned that it' just not worth it if he really did cheat. It actually hurts your own selfesteem.. which is why I felt the need to speak up. I care for you and don't want you, or anyone to have to go thru that feeling. Alrighty, enough on that! What did you scale say when you peaked?

So last night my brother informed me that him and his gf broke up! Now, they LIVE together, and will continue to do so. Thats just ODD to me! My brother moved into the other bedroom, they are going to still come here together to go shopping on the Nov 11th long weekend... tell me, isn't that ODD??? Phew.. I don't get it! I just needed to let that out.. I am off to price winter tires for my mom! Talk to you all later!

-Aimee

[jillybean720]

Aimee--If, in my heart of hearts, I really felt he cheated, then we wouldn't still be together. There's no three-strike rule with that issue--one cheat and you're OUT! But why would the boy who put 40,000 miles on his car in a year and a half to see me (since I lived in Va Beach when we met and was still about 75 miles away when I moved to Manassas) waste all that effort if he were just going to see someone else? I think the reason I had (have?) such a hard time letting the whole thing go completely is just that I am afraid of becoming one of those naive girls who gets cheated on and just always believes the guy no matter what other evidence she finds, ya know? But since I have no hard evidence (that one conversation was all I ever found, and even that could have other explanations because it never specifically mentioned them being together), then I have no reason to continue to pester him about it. I love that so many people care about me and don't want me to get hurt--know that if Josh ever hurt you, I'd fly across that border in no time, too

I think it's great that your brother and his (now) ex-gf can still live together. I would hope that if Jeff and I ever broke up, it would be on good enough terms so we could still behave like rational adults and at least live out the rest of our lease together if we had to.
The scale this morning said I'm down another 2 pounds so far this week, so let's hope that still carries over to the TOPS scale on Thursday night

[Gardenwife]

Hi, everyone. Sorry I've been scarce. It was a busy weekend, as usual lately, and I was out all yesterday afternoon and evening. My doctor's office got me in to one of their emergency appointments yesterday since I'm still on the puny side of life. I was glad to see my own doc this time and talk with her about several things other than this walking pneumonia stuff.

There's something going on with my right hip with numbness and burning, plus my left knee and lower back are giving me trouble; she had x-rays done of all of those areas, plus some of my lungs. She said that to her eye she didn't see any arthritis or spurs in my knee, so it may be ligaments. She sent the lumbar and hip films out to be read elsewhere.

My lungs look good, so hopefully this new antibiotic will clear up what infection still has me worn down. She agreed that I would benefit from upping my dosage of Lexapro for the winter months. However it all works together, I'm ready to feel better!

Beggar's night was last night, and I spent it over at our friends' home. Not one piece of candy passed these lips, I'm happy to say. I had sensible portions of the spaghetti and meatballs she'd made, and did have a piece of cake.

Howie was having a bad night, though, and got a triple & fries at Wendy's for his lunch. Then when he got home we had ice cream, and too much of it. I wasn't as over until the ice cream. And it wasn't as bad as I could have been, but still was knee-jerk emotional eating, which I don't want to do. So, no candy, but too much ice cream. I would have eaten far more chocolate calories had I started with one mini-bar, though! LOL

[SwimGirl]

In my discussion with my manager who is the life coach, I asked her what the key to weight loss was...

Are we ready for it??

I'm not...

Okay..

It's...

Dealing with the emotional issues that cause the eating.

Seems simple enough, but wow, I don't know if I'm ready for THAT!

Kimberley - I sure hope you get back to your normal swimming self soon! Sickness is such a PAIN! What is Lexapro?

I am off to get some exercise in.. ttyl!

-Aimee

[Gardenwife]

I hear you on the emotional eating. Lexapro is an anti-depressant, one of the SSRI types.

[SwimGirl]

A few years ago I went on Antidepressants, I tried two, and neither worked for my body, I began to sleep all the time, and became an emotionless void. I hated it, I would have rather been crying all the time! My doctor didn't listen to me.. so I sought out other ways of dealing with depression. Thats why I'm doing the 5HTP. We all have our ways of dealing.. I'm glad you and your doctor see eye-to-eye on it. I mean, we know our bodies best, and the doctor is there to aid you in being your best. Perhaps we need to move to a REALL sunny place? I find the sun makes me happy.

On the line of emotional eating? I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with my issues. I'm not ready to accept that my life hasn't been perfect.. ah denial.. It's not even that is has to be THAT screwed up.. just one comment at one time could do it. I'm learning a few things from this Life Coach of a manager... maybe she's come into my life to aid me along this journey of life?

Alrighty, on that note! I am excited to say I exercised again! Two days in a row! Woohoo! I try to do some healthy eating and/or exercise on Biggest Loser night... is that weird? Have a great night!

-Aimee

[Gardenwife]

A lot of the antidepressants make people really sleepy for the first few weeks, but the body should adjust if it's working for the person. When I first took this, I could *not* stay awake. Then, I was just sleepy and yawned uncontrollably (great timing - I worked at a call center!). It got better, though, and just helps me stay at an even keel. It's been a real life-changer for me and I wish I'd talked to my doctor years earlier.

[dragonwoman64]

Marge - I am so happy to have you back, I missed you SO much during the summer!! In the spirit of thanksgiving, I'm greatful for my american counterpart! So how are you going to deal with the upcoming season of eating? Well, you have to start with breakfast, if you are on top of eating healthy meals consistantly, those little "treats" won't budget your weight. Of course, I had garlic bread, cracks and some candy for breakfast. Like "berries", heh.

Ahhh, I'm greatful for you too! And all you gals! I almost always eat cereal for breakfast and I never skip breakfast (what? me skip a meal??). Rob thinks and I guess I'd have to agree that the extra treats are the killer for me. What is cracks?

You know, I do believe people and things happen all the time to help us along, sometimes we recognize it, and sometimes we don't right away. Congrats on the exercise! It's one day, sometimes one hour at a time for all the improvements. Re: Biggest Loser, didn't you think Mark looked handsome at 228 lbs? Wow. He's from Campbell CA which is where my brother lived for a while (a suburb of San Jose).

I don't think I could ever live with an ex, I mean, wouldn't you need to have a certain emotional distance to do that? what if they start going out with somebody else and you're living there having to see that?

You know, I can feel that resistance in me that says I don't want to give up those good foods we cook for thanksgiving, like stuffing and pie and cranberry sauce. I get that it's for a great cause, but mentally I need to get myself in the place where it doesn't feel like a deprivation. I'll be coming back here to get and and

Re: all the emotional issues, I've sludged through some of it in therapy. Took Prozac for about a year (am so glad I did that, totally helped with a period of depression for me). It is tough. I know I haven't dealt with everything. Thurs on Dr. Phil is about extreme food obsessions.

Kimberley, lots to deal with physically and health wise for you. Don't let it get you down. I know that's easier said than done Man, the emotional eating is hard! And when you don't feel well, it can creep up. Baby yourself.

Jill, you have lots of good people to talk to and get perspective, which is GREAT. I'm jealous of your weight loss momentum, I need to get mine going again!! You should really pat yourself on the back about going through a hard time and still taking care of yourself eating and exercise wise.

Anyway, I've written a book here. I'll just say to end that I think we don't always give ourselves credit for how much we are able to deal with or do. I know personally that I can have the habit of saying that I'm not ready or strong enough, when in truth, I have fears about it and in reality need to push myself. That's me, not saying it's true for everyone.

Take it easy, gals.

[SwimGirl]

Hehe... cracks = crackers.. I'm losing it!

I slept in this morning, skipped exercise, and feel like killing people.. could this be PMS? It sucks working retail on days like this.. I should lock myself away from everyone and anyone.. including myself! On that note.. I'm going to go to work.. Have a good day!

-Aimee

[Gardenwife]

I know personally that I can have the habit of saying that I'm not ready or strong enough, when in truth, I have fears about it and in reality need to push myself.

That, my dear, is the story of my life! I'm the classic underachiever, paralyzed at the thought of getting out there and really taking a risk, really pushing myself.

On a sunnier note, our dogs are stretched out on the big footstool, soaking in the rays. They are so content and have such basic needs for happiness. We've often said we wish we could be our dogs.

[dragonwoman64]

Me too, Kimberley. I struggle with it all the time. It didn't really help that I came to NYC and threw myself into the lion's den, so to speak. Lots of people here without an ego shortage, to say the least.

Amy, you Canadian , pamper yourself, I think you need to do that right now. I get the feeling you have lots of stuff percolating in your coffee pot (don't I have a way with words??).

This thread has been helping me lately. I've been thinking about the whole food/Thanksgiving issue. I'm clinging to wanting to eat all those goodies as a treats for myself when what I really want is the Norman Rockwell gathering of family and friends. My family has been extremely sucky to me lately, after my sister managed to be nominally supportive during this past tragedy. They're just incabable. So, it's up to me to fill in that place.

Hang in there ladies. The sun is shining today, and the leaves on the trees look gorgeous with all those colors. I love the fall. Chloe is asleep in her basket on the filing cabinet -- I agree, these fur creatures really have the life of Riley!

[SwimGirl]

Marge - my fall consists of rain, rain and more rain. I can hear the wind howling... ah the fall in Vancouver sucks!! I can feel my TOM is going to start soon, and then all of this aggression will go away ... My friend is just as bad as me... I have a feeling we should have avoided eachother this week... we are nearly at eachother's throat. I think we sometimes have to fill in those areas that lack the support with people that do. My mom doesn't get a whole lot of support from her family, so she really relies on her friends... we can be your support system!

Kimberley - I'm suck at the age of 17 wherre life is easier.. hense all the crappy jobs. It's amazing how we are all a little alike...

Alrighty, I'm going to go exercise. I did a weigh in today... 263, just asI thought. Thats up a few pounds for me... but I'm going to try and do a christmas challenge, and lose 15 pounds. I think if I apply myself, I can.. I don't go to christmas parties really, no family stuff until the 27th. I might be able to do it! Have a great day gals!

-Aimee

[jillybean720]

Great idea, Aimee! I'll join you on the 15 pounds by Christmas challenge. I'll start with whatever my weight is at TOPS tonight. I was doing so well over the weekend and early this week, but then the past 2 days, I have BOMBED food-wise, so what I thought would be at least a 2-pound loss or the week is now possibly just maintenance (if not a little gain ). The cnady demons in the office got to me hard core, and then I made pierogies for dinner the other night, which would have been fine, except I ate too many and then ate too many more for lunch yesterday I have been good today, so we'll see if I'm retaining much water by what the scale says tonight!

My sister is all excited because her finace booked their honeymoon, so it's feeling more real to her now. They are taking a week-long Alaskan cruise--and they board in Vancouver! Maybe she can sneak me in her carry-on luggage so I can come see you, Aimee

Well, looks like I have to start very closely watching my vacation time here at work. I am taking off a week in December between Christmas and New Year's, a few days in April for my sister's wedding, and a few days in May for my sister's post-wedding party in CT (since our huge CT family can't all go to the wedding in Va Beach). PLUS, I just found out a couple days ago that one of my close friends from high school is getting married in February, so I may have to make a trip to Nashville (where she lives now). Jeff and I also want to go back to Atlanta next year because they just built a new big aquarium down there that is supposed to be really amazing, so we want to check it out. I really wish he got more than one week of vacation time each year!