Oh don't get me wrong I DO believe in doing things for others. And I agree with you that promoting more selfishness in the world isn't a good thing. But weight loss is so personal. It is done because we are the only person who can do it and we do it for ourselves. Sure the results will benefit others too.

But if we let other people dictate how we feel about our efforts, our needs to address those efforts, or lose sight of the fact that when we feel "rebellious" about our need to stick to our diet that the person we are REALLY rebelling against (and hurting) is ourselves then it can become easy to make this journey about other people. It isn't about other people. It is about us.

And sometimes it is easy to make excuses for not doing what we need to do because of other people. For instance "I can't buy those specific foods, that I need to do my diet with because it isn't fair to the rest of the family." Or... "My kids want me to take them places, so I can't exercise today..." Or "My losing weight is worrying my mom, I should make her happy."

Too many of those messages and you can find you don't want to diet. If it seems that your needs are too "selfish" then you may not like that image of yourself, and would prefer to be "fat and happy" than to be thin and "selfish".

I was just saying that it isn't selfish to be the best person you can be. It isn't selfish to put yourself first when you need to in order to drop the weight. The Bible tells us to "Love our neighbor AS ourselves" If we don't love ourselves enough to do the things we need to do to keep ourselves healthy, how are we going to be able to love and give to other people?

Excellent points, Sherry! In fact there are areas of outreach where for right now I am limiting my commitments exactly because I need to make sure I do not overcommitment myself and am not able to get in my exercise, cooking, etc. And yes WE have to do it, whether or not we have the support from others. I am fortunate that I do, but it IS very hard when others try to sabotage our efforts!!!

While I interpret that Bible verse differently than you do... :) I think it means we already love ourselves even if we think or say we don't :) -- otherwise why would we indulge ourselves so much? :) Most of us get up in the morning and head right away for the mirror to see how we look and try to repair things. :)

But I think we are basically in full agreement! :) We DO have to stick with our guns and DO this. And it is amazing the criticism we often face from well meaning people! LOL when I lost weight before people actually tried to convince me to pad my butt (it pretty much disappears when I am thin). Now... if I literally work my butt off and other areas, there is NOTHING on this body getting padded! Also when I reach 180 pounds people started telling me I was going to become anorexic, etc. Good grief... I stopped THAT by starting to SAY, "I weigh 180 POUNDS for Pete's Sake!" :) Turned a few faces red! LOL

OR when you go out to eat and everybody tries to persuade you to eat stuff you know you shouldn't. Sometimes I think though that they are feeling guilty themselves because they should not be eating it either. :)

You are so right though... canNOT let others get you down or give in!! I am thankful we have 3FC where we can come and talk and talk and talk about it... and LOL not only talk but get inspired to get off our butts and get out there and move them... which is what I had best be doing RIGHT NOW LOL.

Have a great Saturday!

Wow!

I guess for me I spend a LOT of time pleasing others, when my friend has a crisis, I drop all my plans and help her out. Which has included dinner's out with my bf. Basically I spend so much time tending to other people's needs, I forget about my own, which leads us to how I got to be this overweight. I agree with selfishness to an extent, and for certain people. I'm not the selfish type, and I really need to explore being more selfish, sounds SO bad to say it.. but if you knew me you'd totally understand. I am definitely doing this for me. I don't know is obsession is the right word, I guess it comes down to an hourly commitment, but if it truely is an obsession? There are worse things that could happen, I'm still leading a fairly normal life for a gal on vacation!

As for my diet and exercise? Well I'm eating between 1600-1800, more towards the higher end of that, with fat at or below 20%, but I also mix that up, 1-2 days a week I try and go over 20%, just to keep my body guessing. I eat whole foods, lots of fruit, veggies, brown rice, lean proteins. I am also cutting WAY back on sugar. For exercise, I'm walking and running, 5-6 days a week, alternating days. And doing weights, from pushups, to arm curls to abs. Trying to get each major muscle group, also on alternating days. I'm under the impression it's a pretty decent program, and its working for my body.

-Aimee

Aimee... sounds like a GREAT program! Good for you!

My bf has jumped into this full force, promising me rewards for weight loss, he's very sweet. My friend? She's seeing my results and is actually scared I'm going to be thinner than her.. she didn't fully tell me this, but hinted at it. And my mom? I just don't think she's gotten to the point where she can realize that its such a huge commitment. I can understand their concerns, I've dabbled in eating disorders before, but to be honest I love food too much to stop eating. My brother and boyfriend keep a closer eye on me because of it, but I truely did learn my lesson.


yeah, there's a lot involved in losing weight, not just the efforts I make, but the reactions of everybody around me too. and it is possible to get overly obsessed. and it's possible to get creeping denial. I've had both those happen, heh heh. I think you're program sounds really healthy, I'm right behind you cheering you on, lady.