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-   -   Tell me It's ok.....Or is it??? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-lb-club/69575-tell-me-its-ok.html)

Sexytink 12-02-2005 06:29 PM

Tell me It's ok.....Or is it???
 
I'm so ashamed of myself today....My first week on my diet and what do I do....

Take my son to the Ice Cream shop after school for being good and what do I get? I get a two scoop of Rocky Road http://smilies.sofrayt.com/%5E/q/bawling.gif

I feel so horrible.... :(

GonnaLooseitagain 12-02-2005 06:47 PM

It is normal to fail when trying. Just remember not to let that set your entire day/night or plan up for failure, just get right back on plan!!! You can do this!!!!!

teahoney 12-02-2005 07:02 PM

We've all been there (I was just there on Sunday. Shh, don't tell anyone). The point is to dust yourself off and keep going. So long as you don't have that "well I messed up this one time so I mind as well give up" attitude then you'll be okay. Tomorrow is another day.

goalnorolls 12-02-2005 07:11 PM

start with your next meal. eat less and get to your goal for the day.
Although it is not ideal, wise women here taught me this, if you are counting calories eat less at your next meal- load up on veges and fruit for the rest of the day. They are filling and less calories, drink lots of water. But don't be too hard on yourself. That why we all start 'diets' over and over again!

You can do this!

sabriena 12-02-2005 07:15 PM

I wouldn't be too hard on yourself!! It was only an ice cream :) Like everyone else has said, everyone makes mistakes and not everyone is perfect! Don't beat yourself over it :) You're doing awesome!!

shrinkingchica 12-02-2005 08:34 PM

In the big scheme of things, one ice cream is not going to make or break you. It is when the 1 becomes 2 becomes 3 and eventually that will all add up. At this point, cut your losses, forgive yourself and get back on track!! You can do this, you have already proven that you can lose 2 lbs, and it goes to reason that you can lose the 120, just don't give up!! :)

jiffypop 12-02-2005 09:35 PM

ya don't have to be perfect ALL THE TIME. but ya gotta be PRETTY GOOD most of the time.

so you had two scoops. big deal. maybe next time you'll have only one, and that'll be a HUGE accomplishment..

baby steps, darlin. be kind to yourself. what would you say to a friend who did the same thing?

icedragon6669 12-02-2005 09:54 PM

what is not OK, is beating yourself up about icecream!
Ok it wasn't the best choice! maybe you may next time find your son a treat where you can get something healthy. Ie your son a mcdonalds sundae, you a salad!, but sheesh it is getting down on yourself that will hurt your plan more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Negative thoughts will snowball!!!!!!!!! and i seriously am not kidding, beat yourself up too many times over the odd wrong choice and soon you will be living in the fridge again!!!!! (i know, i have been there!!)

Change the thought to! Ok i had some icecream, i've been good all week! and i only had one wrong food choice,,, hey that is really GREAT!!!!!!!!!!! either that or go for a walk and tell yourself you have called it even and stop thinking about it!!!!!!!!!

~~Sunshine~~ 12-02-2005 10:43 PM

It is ok! It a new day start fresh!!

ambabs 12-02-2005 10:58 PM

Definetly don't beat yourself up over it. Actually I did the same thing tonight. But in the grand scheme of things I was still ok. I try to keep my daily calories between 1200 and 1700 and because I had done so good all day even eating the ice cream I was still in that range. Higher than I normal am but still less than 1700. I did turn around and do another mile to make myself feel better for the indulgence.

Occasional treats are ok just keep it under control. It's ok to have ice cream everyonce in awhile. It's not ok to have it every night. I've been struggling with my weight since I messed up my knee 11 years ago. In all this time of on again off again dieting the biggest thing I've discovered is that if I don't occasionally allow myself a treat I'm doomed to failure. The way I look at it is that I am ok with doing an extra workout if that's what it takes for me not to totally deny myself.

I feel like I'm repeating myself and I probably am so I'll just say my point. Don't beat yourself up over it. Allow yourself an occasional indulgence just keep it under control. If your that upset about it pick up an extra workout to make up for it.

Oh one more thing. A tip that works well for me is not keeping ice cream in the house. If I have it in the house then I'll eat it till it's gone but if I go to Culvers or DQ and get something then I eat that little bit and I'm fine. Nothing left in the house to tempt me to go into binge mode.

Yogini 12-02-2005 11:03 PM

Maybe learning to reward yourself (and your son) in non-food ways is one of the keys to your sucess! Don't beat yourself up about it, just look ahead and make better choices for your (and your son's) health in the future!

luvchild72 12-03-2005 03:19 AM

As my minister says you get to start over whenever you start forgiving yourself. Start whenever, wherever, whatever time of day you choose but definitely do it because two scoops of Rocky Road is not worth it! God loves you and so should you.

Sexytink 12-03-2005 05:17 AM

Thanks everyone. I do feel better.

What I did was I did an hour of cardio on the eliptical after I wrote the topic. So I do feel a little better. I did though tell myself no toppings and whip cream (as much as I wanted it :rofl: )
I was just a little upset at myself because I didn't think twice about it.
You all are the best. For raising my spirits again.

Trust me, it will not become a habit.

You guys are the best :hug:

barbygirl43 12-03-2005 11:10 AM

As someone posted to me it's about the journey and the ride, not the destination. We are all learning how to eat healthy and have a better relationship with food. I bet you learned a whole lot from having that ice cream. Shoot you went and did an hour of cardio. That more than made up for the few 100 calories you consumed in the ice cream and then some. As long as you realize that it was just one incident and you know that the ice cream could trigger you again, avoid it for a bit. When you think you have better control and know you're not going to blindly order two scoops of rocky road give it another go.
It sounds like you've got it back into perspective.

funniegrrl 12-03-2005 11:42 AM

I want to echo Yogini's thoughts about the food-as-reward issue. Please re-think teaching your son that food is a prize of some sort. It's ok for him (and you!) to have the occasional moderate serving of ice cream -- what's not OK is turning it into something that a person feels they "deserve." That's one attitude that helped me to get well over 300 pounds ...

goalnorolls 12-03-2005 11:55 AM

I tend to reward myself with food. When I got a recent promotion I wanted to go out and eat. I did but I realized i wanted to do mroe. I wanted skin care products so that was my true reward.
When my son is good we take him to blockbuster or to a movie. Lately he has been working out with me and he loves it! I've been teaching him about serving sizes on chips and cookies and believe it or not he is reading before he is eating. this makes me happy because at least I know he is learning while i am too. He used to sit down with a bag and just eat and eat and eat.
Now he is thinking and that is something I was never taught to do. He is not overweight and I don't have him on a diet. In fact he said he was gonna lose weight and I said someone your age shouldn't lose weight by diet and said he is young enough that he can just learn better habits.

babs2810 12-03-2005 03:21 PM

what a great thing to teach your son goalnorolls! i am trying to encourage my daughter to watch her serving just to be AWARE of what she is putting in her mouth. shes a perfect size 8 so she is the right size but i know how easy it is to wake up one day and say "what the heck happened to my waistline?!" My mom taught me to cure a bad day with a sugar cookie. that didnt get me very far. we all have a responsibility to our kids to teach them what we have learned. sounds to me like alot of us are off to a good start!

gingerG 12-03-2005 08:01 PM

Well, what can I say, who doesn't blow it from time to time. Dieting is not that easy because its a big change and its everyday. What my skinny girlfriends usually do when they over indulge one day, is cut back the next. That's how they keep their weight stable. They never seem to feel guilty about it either.

synger 12-04-2005 12:40 PM

"I was just a little upset at myself because I didn't think twice about it."

You may not have at the time. But you did later. That's probably a change in your thinking right there. You posted it here. That in itself is a triumph!!

I know I went through the same sort of change in my thinking. And next time, you'll probably think about it sooner, maybe even before you order. It's all part of the process.

I've found that if things are part of my family's life, like going out for ice cream, then I need to accept that. That's just the way it is, and I have to deal. So I try to think ahead of time about strategies for dealing with those inevitable times.

We go out to ice cream. What are my options?

Get nothing, or just a diet soda, and feel completely deprived. (not a very good option, in my eyes. Sometimes I really only want a soda, like at the movies, but sometimes, damn it, I WANT ICE CREAM, TOO)

Get a small cone or sundae and share with Gem. (It works right now because she's so small, but that probably won't be an option in a couple of years). This satisfies my sweet tooth with much less than I usually would get.

Get a lowfat option -- like frozen yogurt, sherbet, or sorbet, instead of full-fat ice cream. That way I get the sweetness without feeling too deprived.

Get a small version of what I'd normally get. When I really just want full-fat, luscious chocolate ice cream, I get a small, one-scoop of whatever my favorite flavor is. And then I eat it slowly and savor every mouthful. This is the option I usually go for.

Get my regular thing and only eat part of it. when we go to Dairy Queen I LOVe their pecan mudslide. It doesn't come in small. So I get it and only eat half of it. Again, I try to eat slowly and savor it. Otherwise I go into "vacuum mode" and it disappears all too quickly without me realizing it, or even really tasting it.

Get my regular thing and enjoy it. No guilt and move on. I sometimes save up calories or declare the day my "treat day" where I don't have to limit what I eat (although I do still count up the calories and put it in Fitday). The good part of doing that is that I can splurge, and enjoy it, and KNOW that it's still part of my plan and not become so discouraged that I eat ice cream every nght that week.

It's much better to eat in triumph and enjoy it, to own the choices you make and savor each mouthful, knowing it will be a once in a while thing, rather than to eat in despair, furtively, guiltily, and have it taste like ashes in your mouth and lead to bingeing from guilt afterward.


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