3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

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MissLoud 10-12-2014 03:30 PM

Okay to after my teenage tanty I gave myself a bit of a shake up and went for a walk. I've got to stop focusing on the scales!!!!! Managed a really good day on plan and have sorted what I'm having today.

Weigh in was kind but I don't feel I deserve it because exercise was nonexistent because of my flu - 2.6 pound this week. Back to the rower today and have organised a 10km walk this weekend with some girlfriends.

Erg I hear you uber - no eating after dinner!! I have two little ones so we eat early! I try and leave a contingency of calories so can have some fruit and a herbal tea, fresh pinapple last night. I also try and keep my hands busy knitting or sewing as I like to eat when I'm bored. You can do this!!!!

Hi to everyone else!! and I apologize for my tanty the other day lol, my husband just doesn't understand.

garnetrising 10-12-2014 06:54 PM

Lack of sleep shut my filter down bit while hanging out with J last night. Said some slightly lusty/flirty things I might normally have kept to myself. Then I came home, quite worked up - if you know what I mean - and told my brother's fiance I needed a drink. So we split about half a bottle of vodka and cranberry juice. I don't regret anything I said, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a bit concerned about two things. 1) That I'm not sure I'll be able to look him in the eye the next time I see him without blushing and 2) That I might seriously fall hard for this guy. And the thought of that scares me a little.

ubergirl 10-13-2014 12:44 AM

evening check in.

Over calories AGAIN today. Logged 1640. I'm just not settling back into my good groove yet, but I'm NOT GIVING UP. I just have to stick with it. Right now my goals are:

1. log daily no matter what.
2. don't go off the deep end.

That's it.

If I can get through this rough patch without gaining I'll consider it a win.

toastedsmoke 10-13-2014 07:11 AM

Hey everyone!

MissLoud: Of course you deserve whatever weight loss you experience! Even if you couldn't work out, you were eating right. Whilst sick. And mothering little kiddies. And dealing with grief. And not only that, you then started exercising the moment you felt a teeny smidge better! You deserve every one of those pounds to the tenth decimal place. Are you kidding?! I mean.... Own it, woman! In any case, I've found that majority of scale weight loss is food-related more than exercise-related unless you're at a normal weight and have a low sedentary maintenance calorie level OR prefer to create a calorie deficit through exercise. You work so hard at this, enjoy every bit of success you get, okay?

garnetrising: Oops... Since you regret nothing you said, at least you put yourself out there, no game playing. If it's awkward next time then it's not meant to be. The biggest regret is saying or doing nothing because of fear. That's where I am. And maybe my heart is whole, but is my life richer? Big NO! Nothing ventured, nothing gained, eh? You've been through a lot this year and been brave, have courage and live life! #YOLO

ubergirl: Keep plugging away! You can do this. Yes maybe you're not where you want but none of us here regained because we ate 1600 calories a day. It may not have been exactly where you want to be but you're still winning 1.) Because you're still here posting and checking in, 2.) Because you could've given up and slid into binges but haven't. Even if you've seen a little gain, I doubt it's because of 1400 calories and 1600 calories a day of damage. Our bodies sometimes are confusing. Stay away from sodium- gain weight, eat sodium- gain weight, do nothing out of the ordinary- whoosh! Keep at it, don't give up! You're winning, whether or not it feels like it.

Okay so Sunday was a bust. Sunday is usually my "free" day. It has been from the very beginning of my journey. I usually have a huge Sunday brunch with family or friends and then have a moderate dinner at some point in the early evening. Well yesterday, I missed Sunday brunch because I was at work and I had grabbed breakfast on the go. Well I didn't eat again till I got home after 11pm and feeling gypped, let's just say I went to town! In a big way. In such a big way that I couldn't sleep lying down. In such a big way, that I'm still full and it's past noon the day after. I'm back to my senses and back on plan but yesterday wasn't well done of me. It was an awesome excuse to skip a free day and build in some extra deficit going into this week but I blew it. But it's okay. That was yesterday. Today is today. I'm doing alright and I'm super on plan. I'm doing 5:2 IF with my dad and today is a fast day. It's helping that I'm still sooo full and indigested from last night but again that's not stopped me from eating in the past. I go 16 hours without eating so for me, I'm not eating till 4pm in another 4 hours or so. I spoke to my dad on the phone and HE got up early to work out... My competitive side has been triggered. I can't let him outdo me. I must workout somehow today.

Anyway, I wish everyone a wonderful day. I'll check in later if I can.

ubergirl 10-13-2014 11:53 AM

Ok, time for me to catch up with everybody.

Toasted Missed brunch, felt gypped, ate way too much??? That is a pattern I'm totally familiar with. That happens to me too. At least we recognize it. Recognition is the first key to being able to avoid it. I'm glad you're back on track! Hope you have a good day.

Miss Loud 2.6 pounds gone even though you were sick is EXCELLENT! Good job!

Jessica When I don't get enough sleep that is exactly when I say all kinds of things I didn't mean to-- but hey, you dig him and you let him know it. I'm sure you feel vulnerable right now, but it's great that you are keeping your heart open.

Jenni Kudos on working out so much! The post work-out feeling is absolutely awesome.

Lulu Way to go on the loss!

Mandy Hope you had a nice weekend.

Diane Not sure if you're still swamped with work or on vacation, but hope all is well with you.

Martini I've been using your mental technique and it is definitely helping me! Hope the work situation is improving at least slightly.

Laurie Way up thread, I think I saw that your interview went well! This is FABULOUS! And you know that your tininess only helped you make a good impression. Let us know what you've decided!

Another day, another day for me to be on plan. I'm going to pretend that none of my off plan days even happened.

LaurieDawn 10-13-2014 11:59 AM

Super busy weekend. Drama at work. Had a battle with a coworker. I was right. But it blew up beyond my expectations and became a Pyrrhic victory. But it's a bit entertaining, at least. =)

I am having a struggle similar to Uber. I do really well during the day. I restrict calories. I work out (though I am having asthma-related breathing issues, so my runs are not as good as I would like them). Then I come home and want to eat the house. It started with a cupcake. I had actually brought it home from work on Friday for my husband to eat, per his request, and he wouldn't eat it! I begged him to eat it because it was burying itself into my psyche. If it were mine, I would have tossed it when it first started bugging me and been done with it. Or I might have eaten it, recognized they were empty calories, but not an overwhelming number of them, and moved on. But it just got worse. I ate chocolate and pop tarts to avoid eating the cupcake. But it didn't help. And he didn't eat it at all on Friday. And then, didn't eat it all day Saturday. WTH? I told him that if he didn't eat it soon, I would get rid of it, and he still didn't eat it. So, I finally ate it at 5:30 Saturday evening, and he came up looking for it within seconds of my finishing it. And then I felt overwhelmingly guilty. Days tend to be easy for me. Evenings tend to be incredibly difficult.

Toasted - I know that "ate so much I can barely function the next day" feeling. And the "I didn't get to consume these calories in a really enjoyable way, and I feel so deprived by that, I'll consume calories in a reckless way" thing too. Sorry. =/ I am very excited by your IF strategy, though. I can't wait to see how that plays out.

Uber - As I detailed above, I am struggling too right now. And I thought yesterday, "This is hard. Really, really hard. Sometimes, it seems easy, and there are points that are easy. But we're here because, at least for us, it's hard. But that doesn't mean we can't, or won't, do it.

Jessica - Yay for saying things that need to be said! Even if it's awkward, sometimes things just need to be said. Confession: I married my first husband at 19 without much prior dating experience. I dated a few people between my first and second husband, but was never interested enough to even kiss any of them. It took FOREVER for my husband, who was actually much more experienced at this than me, to kiss me. And we had some super awkward times. But we both knew how much we liked each other, and worked through the awkwardness. Hopefully, it will smoothly transition into romance for you, though. =) #TeamJ.

Oops. Forgot I had a lunch meeting. Ugh. I set them, but it doesn't mean I don't hate them. I will hopefully get back here to complete the post later today. Hope all y'all have a fantastic day.

garnetrising 10-13-2014 02:58 PM

Toasted, sorry you missed out on your free day and that it ended up leading to something of a mini binge. On the bright side, you're not trying to stuff your face this morning, too. And it's cool that you're getting to make this journey with your dad. Embrace that competitive streak and run with it.

Uber, yay for staying on plan!!

Laurie, I say don't feel guilty for eating the cupcake. The fact that it was "his" is moot. He didn't eat it and it was going to go bad if it didn't get eaten or thrown out. And yes, it's empty calories but every once and a while, it's nice to allow yourself to indulge.

I'm down to 195.5 lbs today. I say .5 even though the scale doesn't read tenths because it was sitting in between the 195 and 196 tickers. I can't help but think getting 8 hours of sleep the last two nights (off from both jobs yesterday and just working HD today) is playing a huge role. I'm not going to complain either way.

So we ended up going to this Mary Kay demonstration for an acquaintance. It wasn't all bad. There were snacks... But by the time we got home, the both of us felt like clowns and literally when straight upstairs and washed it all off. Neither of us wear a lot of bronzer or blush and it was crazy. I like just enough foundation to look fresh-faced and feel like my imperfections aren't quite so obvious. I don't need bold lip stick or bright pink blush. What I do use for color is eye shadow. That's it. And some times eyeliner. But like they're having me put on two different colors of mascara and I'm like my lashes are long enough, thick enough, and curly enough on their own. The few times I do use a mascara, it's clear. And I haven't used it at all in years.

As for J, it wasn't so much awkward that I was worried about as it was me blushing like a nuclear detonator for being that open about things that fall under the "slightly sexual" category. I'm not going to lie, I made a point to run around with Jamie (the brother's fiance) all day yesterday in order to keep my mind from focusing on how his perception of me might have been diminished. I know it sounds silly, and it is, really. I mean, the guy is 40, he's not exactly inexperienced.

That being said, I have been working really hard to keep myself for falling. I know how easily my heart breaks and it usually leads to me not opening it up at all in order to avoid the pain. But every once and a while I find someone who feels like they're worth the pain. He does. He makes me smile. And when we're together, we laugh. We can relate to each other. Even in the quiet moments, I'm content just to sit beside him. Especially when we're listening to some sort of music.

Anyway... where was I going with this (got distracted by a call from my mother). I remember. I've been worried that the potential depth of feelings I could end up feeling might not be reciprocated. And then yesterday, I fought to keep myself busy in case things did get awkward... I'm so used to finding myself in a position where I have to initiate conversations with guys that it's always a pleasant surprise when he sends me a text.

Well he sent me text. I really, doubly wasn't expecting it. Not given how awkward I felt. And the way guys normally don't start a conversation. I knew he had some school work to get done, too, so when he said he was craving cocoa I got all warm and fuzzy. And then when I told him I could go for a cocoa but too bad it was a 40 minute drive and he came back with he was good til 10 and it was just a question of whether or not the drive was worth it to me..... Needless to say, my next message was "leaving now".

Anyway. There was also the comment made during a conversation about how "you know I'm not supposed to be here with you, right?" ... I mentioned that only because he was promoted to DH and he said it was one of the biggest draw backs.... here's the thing. If we were strictly friends, I don't think the company would have a problem with it. The implication, made by him, that spending time with me suggests that there is the potential that he's willing to put his job at risk just to see me which implies that there is, at the very least, the potential for feelings of something more from him if they aren't there already. I'm a giddy mess now because of it. I don't like the idea that I might put his job at risk but I'd be lying if I said the thought of someone risking their job just to spend time with me wasn't incredibly flattering.

I just need to get enough money saved up and find a way to make enough on commission from Verizon to be able to put in my 2 weeks for Home Depot and still feel like I can get by comfortably while having enough extra income to continue to pay off debts. Then not only will I be right down the road (10 mins for example vs 45 mins), I'd also not be potentially putting his job at risk if someone found out. XD

MissLoud 10-13-2014 10:22 PM

Yes toasted you are totally right I do need to celebrate my successes and don't get down about the perceived slips. So I'm proud I am staying on plan with my husband away, usually it leads to me stocking up on junk food to chow down on when the kids go to bed to destress! Last night I had a giant salad and did my nails. Tonight I'm going to play round with halloween make up, technically halloween isn't a big thing here but it is fun!

Small steps lead to great strides

Oh Jessica sounds interesting! Such a long time ago my husband were in that, will he won't he does, he doesn't he part - those early days are so exciting!! Have fun with it - makes me feel old lol!

Hope everyone is doing okay :hug:

ubergirl 10-14-2014 12:06 AM

Miss Loud Yay for small steps leading to great things! I love how you are distracting yourself by doing other things!

Jessica195.5 is solidly below 200!! I like that you have such a good plan to move forward-- sounds fun and exciting and I'm sure you'll do it!

Laurie I wish that you weren't struggling, but I do understand where you are coming from. One of the biggest mysteries to me is why sometimes we struggle and sometimes we don't. I can dig deep and try to find reasons, but most of the time there is no discernible reason. I DO like the idea of just saying to yourself "this is really really really hard." And I definitely get the cupcake thing too.

So, for me, AT LAST I had what I would consider a pretty good day and stayed on plan. I was actually really hungry between lunch and dinner, which I guess shows me that my body was noticing that I was giving it less food again.

My big thing is that I'm TRYING really hard to learn new mental techniques for dealing with the binge urge. Some of them seem to work pretty well.

1. Put a frame around it: you think of the food you want to binge on and put a frame around it, as if it were a picture. Weird, right? I don't know why this would work, but supposedly it distances you from the food, making it seem less real.

2. Sit with the craving, feel it shrinking, and imagine that it's small enough to fit in a box. This is a version of something Martini said and the image really worked for me. If I just say to myself "sit with the feeling" and I think "this is what the craving feels like" it gives me a little bit of distance and my thought process can shift from this overwhelming feeling of wanting to eat something to realizing that really I don't actually want it that bad and could deal with the feeling.

3. Call it a hooker: I say to myself, you UBER have decided that you don't want to eat that, and the voice that is talking to you and saying you want it isn't really you-- it's the HOOKER. She is dressed in a skin tight red sequin dress, a hat with a little black veil, and she is smoking a cigarette in a holder... (she looks a bit like Cruella Daville now that I think about it...)

BOTTOM LINE: from the reading that I've done on the subject, it's all about breaking the BINGE BINGE BINGE urge by distracting yourself and giving yourself a moment to decide that you don't actually HAVE to do it.

So, does this stuff work? Imperfectly, but sometimes it does seem to work. The bottom line is that when I have the CRAVING to eat something it feels completely overwhelming and I feel powerless. Most of the time when I'm on plan, I stay on plan because I'm not plagued by cravings. But this past week, I've been craving every single day and so I'm trying really hard to retrain my brain.

I'll keep ya'll posted to see if it works.

martini 10-14-2014 12:25 AM

Hi everyone! :wave:

I didn't want to just disappear so I'm popping in to say hello. Focusing on my eating isn't something that I have a lot of room to think about right now. Life is giving me an opportunity to learn and grow and far be it from me to say no. :)

LaurieDawn 10-14-2014 10:13 AM

Martini - You have such an amazing soul. I hope the learning and growing can be accomplished without too much pain.

Uber - I wish neither of us was struggling. I actually did well yesterday. I had a lunch, which is not my favorite, so I ate more mid-day calories than I'm used to. I then had a really light dinner after I lifted weights, and was satisfied for the day. It's just weird.

I love your strategies, especially the Cruella deVille hooker one. I finally broke down and exposed some of my craziness to my husband. I brought him dinner (nice of me, right? and I could then eat what I wanted to eat without guilt), but it came with a corn muffin. And those corn muffins are delicious! He asked if I wanted it. I said no, but it needed to not be in front of me. If he was going to eat it, great. If not, I needed to bag it up and put it in the fridge so it didn't occupy any of my brain space. And it worked. Last night. We'll see about what happens going forward. I really think part of the craving thing is physical, and I don't really believe the whole, "Your body knows what it needs" thing.

MissLoud - Making it through the sickness with a loss is AWESOME. Staying on plan when I'm not able to exercise can be really, really difficult for me. And yay for salad and fun distractions from food!

Jessica - Eating the cupcake would have been fine. If it hadn't been my husband's, I would have probably eaten about 1/3rd to 1/2 of it and thrown the rest away, and that would have been it. Having it sit there haunting me and eating tons of calories to avoid eating it = not fine. But a lesson learned. =)

And lovely having the infatuation with J. I'm so happy that you are enjoying the company of someone who genuinely cares for you. It's so much less soul-withering than trying to be with someone who is ambivalent. Remember telling us that you deserved better? And now you have it! Even if this isn't your forever guy, having these experiences are incredible. And you have taken up permanent residence in Onederland. I'm so proud and excited to watch your patient, long-term efforts pay off so handsomely.

I'm down to 201.4 again. And while I really want to cross into Onederland, I also am not feeling anxiety about it right now. I have actually enjoyed being a little looser about my eating. The binges make me unhappy because they make me uncomfortable and freak me out a little. But the times when I ended the evening with a single serve bag of chips that contain 150 calories -- that feels like a transition to "normal." Especially because I also had days when I ate fruit as a snack as well. I am not on the Weight Loss Express right this minute, but I am also not marooned in Fatland. And there have been so many times when I have coveted the 2-teens and thought how happy I would be to maintain there. Maintaining around 200 is a great thing. But I would also like to be in Onederland. =)

Have a great Tuesday, everyone! Had some weekend work drama that spilled over to yesterday morning, so looking forward to a more tranquil day.

jenjenangel027 10-14-2014 11:16 AM

I have been MIA. My husband was home for a four day weekend which was nice!!!!

Good news...I feel SO much better looks like the flare has passed hopefully for a long long while! I am inching towards the teens....hope to get there soon and I am keeping with the exercising with weights I give a lot to that helping me!

Hope everyone is doing okay I will start the personals tomorrow :)

ubergirl 10-14-2014 02:07 PM

Jenni Such great news on both counts! Glad your hubby was home and that the flare-up has passed. I really admire the way you hung in there in spite of the pain. Go you!

Martini Thanks just for popping in-- hope the learning and growing is in a good way! Even when you're not here, you're here in spirit, and I can't tell you how often some little bit of Martini wisdom helps me through my day.

Laurie First, let me just stop to comment that I forgot to mention that while I hate that you had a bad day at work and ended up with a Pyrrhic victory, I do love anyone who uses that expression! :-) How awesome that we have a bunch of word nerds on this thread. Second, I'm genuinely sorry that you are struggling; it is just SO HARD when we struggle. And HOORAY for having a good day yesterday! Hovering where you are, just one pound above that big 200 threshold is bound to be stressful, but every day that you are neither marooned in flatland nor riding the goal express is a good day.

Jessica I'm so rooting for you to get to a place where you only have to work one job.

So, for me. I'm delighted to report that I FINALLY had a fully on plan day. It was even more amazing because I ended up being put into a classic uber-binge set-up. After dinner, I had to drive to CVS to pick up a prescription for my mom. Now, I should explain that one of my most typical binge situations is when I end up doing a little errand alone, especially in a drug store, which is a place where I often buy candy. Second, my dad who has alzheimers, craves candy, so my mom asked if I could buy him some candy while I was at the store picking up her RX. So, it was literally the worst possible set-up for me. It was after dinner, which is the time I've been most struggling, I was going to a store where I've gone expressly to buy candy on many occasions, and I had to go down the candy aisle to get the candy for my dad. Yikes!

So, here's how it went down.

I. I thought, I'm going to this store and I'm worried I'm going to buy binge food.
2. I reminded myself that I was post-dinner and still on plan.
3. I thought about the fact that I was actually still a little bit under calories and could eat a "small piece" of candy.
4. I told myself that that might be a bad idea.
5. I practiced every single mental distancing/anti-binge strategy I could think of.
6. I realized that I could probably eat some dark chocolate which is not something I tend to over eat.
7. I walked down the dark chocolate aisle, read the package and realized that one serving was 190 calories, which seemed more than I was willing to spend, especially since I knew it really would scratch the "binge" itch anyway. I decided to leave it behind.
8. I came home with my dad's candy, my mom's RX and nothing for me.
9. I ended the day on plan.

Such is the interior of the UBER-BRAIN. Not a place any of you would want to visit. But, I chalk it up for the win and today I feel a lot more able to keep going. Hopefully, the week of teetering is now behind me and it will be more smooth sailing for a while.

LotusMama 10-15-2014 01:06 AM

Hello Everyone! I am sure you wondered if I fell off the face of the earth! I am still here. I have been SLAMMED at work and up until last weekend, still was feeling under the weather. I kept coughing and felt generally bleh, which was particularly hard given how much work I have had. I ended up going to urgent care and got some antibiotics and am feeling a lot better.

I haven't been to the gym in a couple of weeks, which is hard, because I was just starting to feel like I was getting my mojo. I haven't lost, but thankfully haven't gained.

I have thought about posting here so many times over the last two weeks, but just couldn't spare the time. I really shouldn't even be posting right now; I have lunches to pack and some work to do that I brought home. But, I just felt like I had been away too long.

I will try to read all the posts over the weekend and get caught up. Until then, I just wanted say hello and let you know that I am still here.

Also, Uber, congrats on defeating the binge. That is a huge success!

ubergirl 10-15-2014 01:44 AM

Lotus So happy to hear that you are hanging in there but sorry that you've been sick and over-worked at the same time. That is the absolute worst!

I'm just here for my nightly check in. No binges today and about 1400 calories... so above the 1200 but maybe that's just what I need right now. I had an easy day-- none of the awful struggles of the past week! Hooray!

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