Diane - I LOVE that video. :) (also, Congrats on 240s!)

I have some physical weirdness going on... I don't remember this from last time! My spare tire has gone from fairly solid to pretty soft and squishy in places. I hope that means good things are happening!

Car is in the shop today, routine stuff... Tire rotation, lube up a squeaky belt. And get a quote on replacing the bad motor mount because it sounds like my car wants to die every time I start it because of the vibration. The shop is only like, 3/4 of a mile away, if that, so I'll walk down with hubby when it's time to pick it up. Also, BONUS: the shop owner gives a little bit of a discount to the seminary students and alumni. :D So, hopefully this won't take a huge chunk out of our bank account. Just want to be sure my 13 year old car can make the trip to Indiana in a few days. :)

Thinking I'm gonna try some salmon tonight, without much seasoning, so I can get the flavor of it and figure out how I want to doctor it up next time. I'm thinking just a little oil, salt, pepper, garlic... and broccoli cheese to go with it.

I hope you all have a fantastic day!

Diane: Hooray! So happy for you! Isn't that a great feeling! And also, I finally watched that video and it was simply AMAZING!!!

LotusMama: I'm sure you'll figure out your goal weight... and 130 might be perfect for you. I don't mean to throw my issues on to you!

Laurie: hooray for feeling positive and for having fun at the amusement/water parks. I agree that I'll always be a work-in-progress. I do not think I'll ever reach a point of "this is it."

As for me, I actually had another day when I forgot to eat. Working and didn't think about lunch until 1:30, then at 5 I was really hungry so I started making dinner-- fed my son and father but I had made a delicious curried bean dish for me and DH. Got on the phone with a couple of people and those beans simmered until 8:30 pm. Funny how I was SO HUNGRY at 5:00 and then managed to completely forget about it for 3 1/2 hours!

Question for you all: do you think about food more when you are losing or when you are gaining? I DEFINITELY think about food A LOT MORE when I'm gaining. Yesterday I had to take a long boring drive to pick up my kid from camp. If I were in gaining mode, I would have been stressing about whether I should or shouldn't try to make a food run at some time during the trip. But now, 6 weeks into not doing that, it's a lot more relaxing. I remember thinking that last time I was losing. My life was actively less stressful because I wasn't constantly thinking about food, wanting to eat, getting something to eat, and sometimes also, covering my tracks about how much I had eaten. So, really, isn't that the exact opposite of what it should be? I mean, if it's less stressful not to eat so much, why do I relieve stress by eating?

Hmm. Good question.

I think about food more *now* than I did when I was gaining. I think the difference is when I'm gaining, it's a lot of mindless snacking, and now it's a lot of mindful eating, so I'm much more conscious of the food decisions I'm making and not just shoveling things that are available into my face.

I think about food all the time, whether losing or gaining. When I am gaining, I am constantly, constantly hungry or overfull. Never anything in between. So, I am always thinking about trying to get the next meal, or how long I have to wait until I am comfortable enough to eat again. And I never just say, "Well, I'm gaining now, so accept it." I'm always trying to do just a little bit better or making little adjustments or justifying in some way. It's miserable.

And when I'm losing, I am always thinking about not eating, or making sure I do eat. And I plan meals or strategies or whatever.

Food is not my friend. I don't know what I can do to change that. I am hoping therapy helps. But I would rather be on the losing end than the gaiing end fo' sure.

Diane - Woo hoo!! 240s!!!

Mandy - I had the soft and squishy, too. It was explained to me that it's loose fat and something to celebrate so... woo hoo!! squishy!!!

Uber - You must live in my head. :)

Me dieting or not dieting doesn't seem to be the decisive factor in whether or not I think about food. I tend to think about food when there are other things in my life that I want to distract myself from, when I'm using food to punish myself (for real or imaginary transgressions or when I think someone else has hurt me and I want to continue to do the job for them), or when I'm using food as a way of soothing myself or relieving anxiety. I'm not thinking about food right now and everything else in my life is just puttering along. Things are good and the little things that do come up here and there are simply life happening.

What I don't know how to prepare for and what I'm more concerned about is what my default option is when things get tough. In the past two years I gained about 25lb after moving and changing jobs. I gained another 25-ish lb after I quit smoking. A lot of stress I was able to deal with without eating, but food was definitely an issue. I never once thought "oh wow this has been a really tough day, let me go work out and then call a friend to relieve some stress." I thought "I would like some greasy noodles for dinner."

What I'm trying to do now is use this peaceful period to strengthen a set of healthy default options. Not thinking about food is part of that, but who knows how well that will work until it's put to the test.

Just checking in now because I may not be able to until Monday. Going with the hubby and stepsons camping and to a waterpark this weekend. Very excited, actually. =)

Wanted to relay a quick story. I met with the trainer at my gym today in honor of my 1-year anniversary. I had gained about 8 pounds, including a half-pound of muscle. He was not happy that I didn't feel bad about it and immediately want to sign up for services with him. After some fat-shaming and some stupid things he said, I made a bet with him. We would meet again in two months. If I didn't lose 12 pounds in those two months, I would sign up with him.

And, that, my friends, seems like EXCELLENT motivation to me. I want to shove it in his face so. badly. Feeling bad about myself never helped me to do better at anything, and I have too many important things going on to hate myself.

So, I bought myself a reliable scale tonight (finally),and tomorrow will be my first official weigh-in of my two-month challenge. That trainer boy is going down. Going down.

Hi all. Yay, it is Friday!!! So glad. I went to spin today and they have replaced the normal guy with this younger woman. This class will be changing to the MOI class, which is still a spin class, but using a heart rate monitor to assist in reaching certain levels throughout the class. I'm not happy about it because I really liked the other guy's style. But, maybe he isn't teaching the MOI classes. Anyway, it isn't that I don't like the MOI class, but I'll be doing it on Saturdays too. I don't really want to do that class two days in a row. Since I've been thinking about adding "Body Flow" to my workouts, I am going to replace the Friday Spin with Body Flow. Body Flow is a yoga/pilates/tai chi class. I have done it before, but that was about 5 years ago. I've been hesitating going back to it because it is not something I'm good at and I think it is hard. But I also know that my flexibility and strength could be so much better than it is now, I have to give it a try. It doesn't give you as much of a calorie burn, but I think it will aid in my objective of getting fit and keeping mobile. It is probably time to shake something up anyway! Looking forward to it.

LaurieDawn: Oh, you have to crush trainer boy!!! This is a great motivator!! He needs to be taken down! Any support you need in this venture, let us know. We're here for you!

Martini: It is tough to keep on track when troubles arise. It definitely is something to think about. With a regain, there are so many times that there is something that happened that totally blindsides you and before you know it, you've gained. I know it was like that for me, too. The key is to keep your head on straight while going through the hard times, but I'm not sure how to make sure that happens. Still a struggle!

Uber: Yeah, I'm like LaurieDawn when it comes to food. I think about it all the time. Now, I constantly think about calorie count. I'm going out to lunch with my kids today and I've been mulling it over to try to figure out what would be a good choice. When I'm not on track, and gaining, I struggle with constantly wanting to snack. Thinking about treats that I just have to eat. Ugh. I don't think it will ever change for me. I'll always have to be mindful.

Mandy: I definitely can relate to squishy fat. Now, what I've heard is when it gets to that point, you're about to experience a whoosh! I hope that's the case for you!!!

Laurie: Awesome motivation! I would want to smack him in the face as well as SHOW HIM!

Fera: Guess what I made for dinner last night? Tilapia with FF sour cream and park. It turned out great! I got really sick of Tilapia, and that recipe jazzed it right up. Interesting that you think more about food when you're losing while I think about it more when I'm overeating.

Martini: We are obviously very similar and you have defined my issue precisely. I can eat healthy and figure out a plan and follow it, for long periods of time actually-- until suddenly I can't do it at all. And the process seems almost magical. I KNOW that managing stress is the biggest component, and after living through the year 2012, I came to realize that for me the is BIGGER than just learning to knit, or drink a cup of tea, or replace healthy habits with bad ones. It has to do with the fact, I think, that I have a tendency to bite off WAY more than I can chew in my life. (not including food, LOL). I'm pretty sure that it's a deeper issue and that I need to figure out how to set better boundaries between what I think I should be able to do and what I'm actually able to do. I have never done therapy except for a few brief aborted attempts, but I have a feeling it would be a good idea.

Laurie: Woo-Hoo!!!!!! You will show him! That will be sweet revenge! I hate the way professionals often assume that we are literally incapable of losing weight without help.

As for me. First, I hit a pseudo-mini goal yesterday. All year I was weighing on an old analog scale that wasn't very reliable. When I first weighed in my top weight was 280 which was 20Lbs over what I weighed at the beginning of the year.(Sept 2013). So, my first mini-goal was to get back to 260. Yesterday I dragged the old scale out of the closet, and per the old scale I weigh 260. I know that really I'm still 265, but I have lost all of the weight gain since September.... woo-boo!
Second: Crazy weigh in story this am. Woke up at 6 am thirsty and got a huge glass of water then went back to bed. Woke up an hour later and suddenly thought OH NO! I drank water BEFORE my weigh-in. Stepped on the scale, weight exactly the same as yesterday. Of course, I'm going to spend the whole day wondering if I wouldn't have weighed .5 less if I hadn't drunk the water. :-)
The stuff we worry about!

Diane: I think we posted at the same time. Really, don't get me wrong. I think about food quite a lot either way, losing or gaining. When I'm losing, I have to plan, and I do worry about situations where I know that I'm not in total control of preparing the food-- like meals out and social events. But when I absolutely know firmly in my mind that I'm only going to eat 3 meals a day and nothing in between. I actually do completely forget about eating sometimes, whereas, when I'm not losing it seems like every minute is a possibility to eat. I remember when I used to work in an office, when I was losing, I could simply tune out the treats in the break room, whereas when I was not trying to lose, I could hardly take my mind off them and was always thinking about getting a moment to sneak in and take a few bites.

Hope ya'll have a good day.

Martini - Moving and changing jobs was the biggest trigger for my regain! HATE upheaval in my life, because I stop thinking about *what* I'm eating, and just eat what's easy and available. Which usually comes hot and greasy in a paper sack. The fact that I eat for comfort is what causes my biggest gains... but I'm never actively thinking about eating, it's almost a reflex... Which is why I think about it *more* now, because I have to actively curb that reflex reaction to go to the kitchen when I'm bored or upset.

Laurie - you will WIN that bet and he will eat his words. But that makes me wonder, what do you get from him if you win? You should try to get a free session :P

Diane - I love hearing about all of your various classes. Makes me wish I could afford a membership to a gym that offers them. :) (well, that, and makes me wish I wasn't so self conscious that I'd probably never attend them...) Also, I've been whooshing all week! :D

Uber: I'm so glad you liked the tilapia recipe! It's one I came up with when I was craving parmesan crusted tilapia but didn't want to do all the stuff involved in actually making it... So, that's where I got the idea. Congrats on your 'pseudo mini goal'... guess it won't be too much longer until you hit it for real! :D

Well. Talking of weighing in means I should probably go do that since it's Friday, since I haven't had any food or drink yet and actually forgot about it. (Forgot it was Friay, anyway).

Might be going to a cook out with the hubby and some friends on campus tonight, if so, it'll basically be a fast until dinner type day. We'll see. I want to make something sweet, but I don't want to keep it in the house. Specifically, these: http://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/c...dough-truffles

Once I know what's going on for dinner, I'll figure out what I'm doing for the rest of the day!

Hope y'all have a wonderful Friday!

Edited to add, for the humor.

I posted this status on MFP last night before bed:

And the *first* comment I got from one of my 'friends' there was this:

I probably should have left it alone, but the hypocrisy and lack of self awareness had me throw this in as a response:

I think I may have lost an MFP friend. :P

Fera: Greetings from a fellow grammar nut! As an author, it comes naturally to me. Loose and lose is one of the ones that particularly makes me crazy. I also can't stand when people mistake affect and effect. As an author, I can tell you that most readers do care A LOT about that stuff. Copyeditors pore over manuscripts before they go to print because a single mistake will generate tons of negative mail! :-) I think people don't realize that if you KNOW the difference between loose and lose then seeing the wrong one is actually confusing.

It is confusing! The one that usually trips me up when I'm reading is the your/you're mistake. It takes me a second to figure out that it doesn't make sense because the person used the wrong word.

Ha! Funny, because that one I make myself-- even though I know the difference. When I get typing fast I sometimes miss it! Grammar nuts unite!

http://i58.tinypic.com/2r383fk.jpg

Also, weigh in was 304.0, so a pound since Tuesday, and 3.2 since last Friday.

Today is 2 months back to it for me, and I've lost 26.6 pounds. :woohoo:

Fera: for the commas --:) and regarding two months and 26 lbs? :carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot::c arrot::carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot::carrot:

I made a treat for my husband. That treat I said I was gong to make for the cook out that didn't happen.

Now these are sitting in the fridge staring me in the face.

http://i1265.photobucket.com/albums/...psae1bb859.jpg

Serious test of will power here.