Hello ladies! Well, I don't know how I'm feeling, today I was 170.0; is it baby weight? Can it be, this early? After such a great week of eating healthy and working out, it has to be. :/
I'm kind of down, though, because the skinny minnie who complained a while back about how awful it is for her to go swimsuit shopping, and then I found out is pregnant and gaining weight rapidly (I endearingly call her Pregzilla, because she's seriously eating 24/7 and asking people for snacks at church ), called me "big" yesterday upon finding out through the grapevine that I'm pregnant. She said "well you have big boobs and a big frame so you don't show quickly." I'm like... are you frigging kidding me!? I don't show because I don't go around eating everything I see like you do! But what I really told her was "well, I'm not showing yet because I'm eating healthy and working out, and actually I'm still losing weight." That shut her up and she admitted what she used to admit before she knew of my pregnancy, that she eats a lot and gains about 100lbs per pregnancy (she loses it all afterwards anyway); but her comment hurt and I couldn't help but see myself bigger than ever since her comment. I don't know why she changed her discourse from "I gain so much weight and show quickly" to "I show quickly because I'm small framed" pointing out specifically how that's not my case.
I'm bummed and hurt. And today I'm feeling like kicking everything to the curb and stop caring about what I eat because what's the point, I'm pregnant and I'm a fatty anyway. Plus I got tendonitis on my right heel and I cannot get on the treadmill and I feel like a total slob.
Sorry about venting. I'm not the kind of person who gets offended easily and resents people for life, but that does not mean that I don't get hurt, and this particular girl lives in a bubble and sometimes isn't very aware of others. She means well, but sometimes it doesn't come out the right way.
Paulitens A few things.
1) Some people say demeaning things to other people to make themselves feel good about themselves. An example:
"You just understand the homework because you study for 10 hours a week, not because you're smart." They say that because they realize they aren't getting it, so therefore people can't possible be what they want to be (in this example, smart).
The same goes with this pregzilla, she said that because she is gaining and she found someone else pregnant and was surprised that you weren't GAINING weight, so she brought you down notches to justify her eating. She wants you to not be gaining for ANY excuse she can make or state just to somehow justify her gain. She's wrong. End.
2) You're a gosh darned with sprinkles on top warrior. Pregnant and dieting while exercising? I always thought I'd get pregnant and use it as an excuse to gain weight. Like it would justify eating and eating and eating. You're not only not using is as an excuse, but you are losing weight in spite of that! OH MY GOD. When I first heard you were pregnant, I was so damn inspired. Everyone has SOOOOOO many excuses as to why they got fat, why they ate that doughnut, why they can't control themselves. We here always just say "try harder" and realize it's an excuse, but when pregnant people say "I just couldn't help it!" Most of us don't see it as an excuse but a reason, and here you are, losing weight, not falling back on that. That makes my "my fiance made mac and cheese and I just couldn't help it *whine whine* sound so freaking pathetic. Seriously, WARRIOR WOMAN you are!
3) Let's pretend JUST pretend, that for some reason this woman is right. So f-ing what? You give up now, then those amazing 40.4lbs you lost mean nothing. All that work, wasted. You got to do this to be healthy, to feel good, and because you set the tone for your little ones. Kids that have active parents, are more likely going to be active. Do it for you and do it for your kids. Even if you never lose a single pound more, at least if you keep at it, you won't ever gain those 40.4lbs BACK. And that is worth the effort. Also, she's wrong. Just a prego trying to justify and use her eating as an excuse, and when she finds someone else in the same situation who isn't using it as an excuse, she feels ashamed so she tears you down. (See point 1 and point 2).
4) Did I mention I heard you were pregnant and still working out and you became my freaking hero? You're awesome. End of Story.
You're going to make me cry, Kurisitaru! Even when you said "gosh darned with sprinkles on top"
Truth is, I'm going day to day trying not to panic at the idea that I'm pregnant and that I must feed the baby (with all the usual overeating that implies), but I have no idea what I'm doing and it's a daily struggle, and I daily having to tell myself "don't eat the chocolate, eat the apple." I've never done this before, I have no idea how I've come 12 weeks into it not giving in to the binges other than the calculated splurges I allowed myself. I don't know why this girl said what she said. What you said about her makes sense, and could very much be true, as she shifted the focus of her usual discourse of "I gain so much weight while I'm pregnant" to a surprising "you don't show because you're big." I'm trying to keep doing my thing the best I can, even if I don't know what that is exactly, and not let those hurtful words get to me any more than they did, whether she did it intentionally or not.
Thank you for listening to my rant and help me out of it! This means the world to me.
No worries, I guarantee she meant it more to justify her own gains. As for the eating part, talk to your doctor. Most of my friends that had kids all did, and they learned that you aren't really "eating for 2" you really only add a few hundred calories depending on the term and activity level. I know it's hard not to get the chocolate and grab the apple, but here's a nifty little fact. On occasion, dark chocolate is good for you, in fact, I make sure to have room in my calories some days so I can grab some wonderful 72% chips they sell at the Rocky Mountain chocolate factory. They are yummy! I think calculating something you want in the diet is a good thing, we can't give up EVERY food we have ever enjoyed for the rest of our lives. On occasion, we need the chocolate, the donuts, the mac and cheese. We just run it off later, or accept the little gain at the end of the week and then work harder next week to lose it again. As long as we aren't having that excuse everyday!
I'm slightly tempted to throw down profanities and see how they change with the filter....
Last edited by kurisitaru; 07-01-2014 at 01:53 PM.
Poking my head in here even though I'm not here yet!
kurisitaru, I wanted to say thank you for your recommendations for Denver! In hindsight I don't think we utilized any of them (eep!) but I have the list for next time. There will be a next time, as we decided we definitely want to move there within the year
Also putting it out there that I am hoping to be in this thread by the end of the month, so maybe being subscribed to it will motivate me...!
Paulitens - Wow what a jerk she is. I'm sorry you are feeling bummed. Remember, you are amazing and you've come so far. Your baby is lucky to have such a healthy mama! You are totally not a slob or a fatty - No negative self talk allowed woman!
kurisitaru - I love what you had to say to Paulitens!
Lotsakids - That is so cool about the picture! I bet it felt great!! I hope you are having a great trip.
Shannonsnail - Congrats on meeting your goal for June.
I'm 182.6 today - I wonder when I'll see the scale stay under 180 LOL. It's just so hard and I really love food haha. But, I sure do enjoy being able to put clothes on and they fit and feel good. It used to be when we went out I'd have to change about six times and usually wasn't happy when I left. This past weekend, we went to a concert (Michael Franti!) and I didn't even plan what to wear - I just pulled out some stuff and put it on and was like "wow you look good girl!" It was a good feeling. :-)
I was sick all last week and didn't exercise, but I am back on track this week - yesterday and today so far. :-)
My MIL is coming to town tomorrow. She hasn't seen me in about a year - so I imagine she will have some positive comments. I really love seeing people who I haven't seen in awhile - it's a nice confidence boost.
Kurisitaru -- don't worry the chocolate/apple thing was just an example. I do eat chocolate occasionally (heck, I couldn't live without it! ), and apples make my tummy churn so I don't really eat apples. I need to move on from this whole thing; I'm better than it.
Shannonsnail -- Way to go! Congratulations!!!
Lilith --Thank you for being so kind! It feels awesome to put together an outfit at the last minute and rock it. Hope your visit with your MIL goes as expected and you get showered with compliments!
The whole "sprinkles" thing... HAHAHAHAHAHA
You guys ROCK, and seriously are the reason why I keep coming back! Specifically to this thread.
This morning I was 170.4. I needed to go to the loo yesterday and I didn't go hence the extra 4 ounces. Today I went out for a bike ride with my oldest daughter; it was "gosh darned with sprinkles on top" fun and we'll do it again, and again and again, until I hit my belly is so big I cannot fit it behind the handlebar.
nonameslob: I'm glad you like Denver, I love it here! When you move, let me know, filled with fun ideas for any price range. Look forward to seeing you over here!
Llilith Wearing clothes and not scrutinizing them must be wonderful. And I have no idea about the filters. No flaming clue, I mean what the **** and stuff? You testing it made me laugh my *** off as well.
We posted about the same time. If that is a picture of you, you certainly don't look like a "fatty." You're a gosh darned with sprinkles on top warrior!
), called me "big" yesterday upon finding out through the grapevine that I'm pregnant. She said "well you have big boobs and a big frame so you don't show quickly." I'm like... are you frigging kidding me!? I don't show because I don't go around eating everything I see like you do! But what I really told her was "well, I'm not showing yet because I'm eating healthy and working out, and actually I'm still losing weight." That shut her up and she admitted what she used to admit before she knew of my pregnancy, that she eats a lot and gains about 100lbs per pregnancy (she loses it all afterwards anyway); but her comment hurt and I couldn't help but see myself bigger than ever since her comment. I don't know why she changed her discourse from "I gain so much weight and show quickly" to "I show quickly because I'm small framed" pointing out specifically how that's not my case.
And today I'm feeling like kicking everything to the curb and stop caring about what I eat because what's the point, I'm pregnant and I'm a fatty anyway. Plus I got tendonitis on my right heel and I cannot get on the treadmill and I feel like a total slob.
Even when you said "gosh darned with sprinkles on top" 
I do eat chocolate occasionally (heck, I couldn't live without it! 
