Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyn2007
How do you stay excited/motivated when you keep working through the same darn numbers over and over??!
I think this is a question that makes or breaks successful weight loss. We're not taught that it's valid, valuable, and inevitable that this is what weight loss and maintenance is - a constant battle with the same darn numbers over and over.
We're taught to expect the weight loss journey to be a steady incline - losing at a consistent pace, with no backsliding, ever. We're taught to expect what our bodies often can't give (at least not without unhealthy and impractical methods).
We're taught to expect maintenance to be a single digit on the scale that never changes; and if it does change we have only ourselves to blame, berate, and punish (and if we don't punish ourselves, we're not doing it "right.")
Real maintenance and weight loss rarely meets our expectations, because the human body is a complicated machine, and we can't make it do tricks on command.
Maintenance is going to be gaining and losing the same pound or three or five or even more pounds. You might as well get used to working with "the same darn numbers over and over," because that's what maintenance is - so you need to learn how to stay excited/motivated when you keep working through the same darn numbers over and over.
The challenge is in making it the same 2-5 lbs, and not the same 20-50 or more.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyn2007
... I think this will be the last time. Of course, I said that every other time too. It's really a battle of maintenance over the past year, fighting just to stay generally in the 180s-190s range. I want to get down into the 170s and keep on losing!
I think "last time" mentality also bites us in the butt - because we then judge every weight fluctuation as a sign of failure. When the scale is even up a half pound, frustration sets in because we vowed never to see that number again.
Weight maintenance is tough, so you need to acknowledge the acheivement you HAVE made this year. You fought to stay in the 180's to 190's range, and you succeeded at that. That's a great acheivement in itself.
Yes, you want to maximize moving forward, and minimize moving backward, but I think one way to do it (at least it's worked tremendously for me) is to avoid the "starting over" mentality and replace it with a "moving on" philosophy.
We're taught to diet that way (by watching everyone else do it, talk about it, write about it....) We're taught to see a slip as a sign that we've "blown it," and since we've "blown it," we might as well really screw it up good, and start fresh tomorrow (or Monday or next month).
We're taught to diet by the perfection method (it only counts if it's perfect, imperfection means we've blown it, and we follow the blown-it protocol).
This is the first time I've had long-term success with weight loss. I've never lost this much weight (I lost 70 lbs in high school on prescription diet pills, and 60 lbs once on Nutrisystem in preparation for a friend's wedding, and 55 lbs on TOPS after I herniated a disk and needed to lose at least 50 lbs to avoid surgery).
Besides three times in 40 years of dieting, I struggled to gain and lose the same 25 lbs over and over and over again, and always by the "start, perfection, slip, guilt, binge, binge more because I've blown it, start over" method.
I always expected each time to be the last, but it never was (because I expected perfection that wasn't possible).
I never maintained weight loss before. I was always steadily losing, or steadily gaining.
I never counted weight loss as maintenance. When I lost 70 lbs with diet pills over the course of 12 to 18 months, I didn't count any of that as maintenance. When I gained 2 lbs, I didn't think "I've gained 2 lbs, but I've maintained a 68 lb weight loss, and if I go off my diet, I'll lose some of that maintenance."
No, I thought "I've gained 2 lbs, I'll never lose the remaining 10 lbs I need to. If I can't lose those 10 lbs, all this work will have been for nothing, I'll still be fat forever, and if I'm going to be fat forever, I might as well get to eat what I want. This struggle is pointless, because I'll never get a break. I'll always have to fight with the same numbers, over and over. If I can't get to perfect, there's no point to keep trying....."
This time was different only because I took "I've blown it" off the table. I wouldn't allow that thought to become reality. This time has been different, because I've focused on maintenance almost from the first pound (at least from the first 20 which I lost without trying as a result of sleep apnea treatment. Even though I wasn't sure if I could lose more, I vowed to keep off those 20 lbs and maybe try to lose "just one more.") It took me a couple years to do the "just one more" part.
I'm not saying your loss needs to be as slow as mine was - but giving up on the "blown it" philosophy really is vital I think. Along with the assumption that working with the same numbers is failure. Maintaining even 1 lb loss, is an acheivement to recognize and build on. But we're taught to focus on the failures, rather than the success (to the point we barely notice the success).
If weight loss were mountain climbing, we wouldn't survive it, because every time we'd stumble, we'd throw ourselves off the nearest cliff in order to "start fresh."
My motto has been "there's no starting fresh, there's no starting over, there's just moving on."