Alright - it's no lie - I've been here before, and I fall off the wagon, get back on, fall off, get back on so here I am again. Back on. And as the hope always is, on for good...but something is different this time. I'm 30, and as it happens when you turn 30 reality sets in... I didn't want to do 'new years resolutions' because it creates too much pressure so instead I've made 30's resolutions (birthday was just before Christmas) which are all about health...mine and no one elses... mental, physical, emotional, spiritual and financial. On the physical end - which is why I'm here - the first thing I did was make a doctor appointment...the first with a primary care physician of my adult life - yes I know that is shocking but let's just say I have extreme medical facility anxiety and have avoided primary care the whole of my adult life. As awful as it was (I'm sure it would have been fine to a normal person) I'm happy to say that I lived through it and it's good to have that eye opener outside your comfort zone of home where no one is watching. I know where my weight is in my doctor's scale (262) and I know she thinks my blood pressure is a bit high (though I'm sure my hospital anxiety helped with that) and soon I'll know what I'm dealing with in terms of cholesterol etc.
It's a starting point and someplace I have to be accountable cause she wants me back in 6 months and I'll be damned if I go back having not made progress. So...anyway here goes. Day one, since I'm 'working from home' for the rest of the day I'm off to the gym. I'm counting calories, I'm on track, and I'm setting a long term goal of 150lbs (so losing 112lbs (I'm 5'5") and a short term goal of 25lbs by my next 6 month doctor appt. I look forward to getting to know everyone here as I'm sure it's all different people from the last time I joined in. Oh and one other thing I'm ready to share...since I feel it has been long enough that I won't jinx myself, I've also quit smoking and I'm proud to say that it has been 30 days since my last smoke. I've gone cold turkey and am thankfully not missing it at all...though I'm still avoiding situations that might trigger me wanting one!