3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

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-   -   Obsessed! (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-lb-club/216084-obsessed.html)

mdchick88 10-29-2010 02:27 PM

Obsessed!
 
When I go on a diet, or even just try to make a conscious effort to eat better, I get so obsessive. I count every single calorie, weigh myself at least 10 times a day, and spend every spare second trying to calculate how long it's going to take to lose weight. On top of that, I obsess about every fat roll and dimple on me! I *hate* my body when I'm dieting. It gets so stressful and so depressing that I just can't take it anymore, and I go back to the way I was eating before. I wish there was some middle ground, where I could be aware of how I look and my calories, but it didn't consume me. I have been doing a little bit better this time, in that I weigh myself once a day and I don't stand in front of the mirror criticizing every bit of me as much. I'm just worried about getting back to the same place I always end up. Does anyone else have this problem? Or, more importantly, did anyone used to have this problem and has since figured it out?

sweetsmmr91 10-29-2010 02:38 PM

When I first started my diet I started really looking at the ugly tagged pictures of me on Facebook and admitting that they weren't just "bad angles". I really started obsessing with what I hated about myself from that point on. It kind of got to like "my cheek bones are too high, my teeth are uneven on the bottom". So it expanded to beyond my weight. I would weigh myself a lot, and at night I'd kind of feel crushed because it'd be the higher (obvviously). So then once I really started noticing my jeans not fitting and my family and friends saying "Oh my God your look at your collar bones! they're sticking out! You're like inches slimmer!" I started being okay with it. As that happened my sense of self-worth started getting better. I bought some corset/gurdle type things to suck it in a bit, and just started thinking positively. It's a long process but really, as you get closer and closer to your goal the obsession starts fading and it just becomes a natural way of life- at least for me. I hope that it happens for you too! I'm still a hundred pounds away, but I'm halfway done.. and you have less to lose and you're doing great! I'm sure you look fabulous either way so maybe try to stop thinking so much in terms of image :)

Tarisaande 10-29-2010 03:03 PM

It's really tough to stop obsessing. It's gotten worse for me the closer I've gotten to goal. At the beginning, it was like I could do no wrong, as long as I ate less than the ridiculous amount I used to eat and exercised regularly. After a while it becomes a grind, and more and more stressful.

You're in it for the long haul, and it totally drains you. It gets really bad for me sometimes, to the point where I cry to my boyfriend and there's nothing he knows to do to help me. I need to step back and stop obsessing, and I can't. So I'm here with you, obsessing.

Sometimes, it's okay. You get on a roll, doing what you perceive to be well for a few days, and the obsession lessens a bit and you relax. The key is to keep up the hard work while being relaxed and it's really tough. Sometimes I find the groove, sometimes I don't. Usually I ***** and moan until I just MAKE myself stop, and then I can calm down and take it easy, using all the energy of obsession for progress instead.

socalfelicity 10-29-2010 04:36 PM

i definitely have had that issue in the past- but now i look at it as a marathon, not a sprint. no quick fixes will get me where i need to go.

progress, not perfection. that's the only way to do it.

otherwise if you try to be perfect, you will eventually slip up and that leads the way to giving up all together.

i try to be my own biggest cheerleader, and realize how very far i've come (not just on the scale but also in my own emotional growth). i am doing this for ME- and so i will be gentle with myself and my own best friend and NOT compare myself to anyone else...because at the end of the day, my weight is just one part of me and it doesn't define me! :hug:

beerab 10-29-2010 05:22 PM

It is hard but I suggest not spending all that time calculating how long it will take you to lose weight, etc, if it's stressing you out.

I honestly weigh in pretty much daily but have learned to not let the scale dictate my attitude for the day.

Just tell yourself to relax and if you find yourself crunching numbers get up and go for a walk rather than just sit there :)

Pacifica Bee 10-29-2010 05:34 PM

I was super obsessive in the beginning, but about different things. I am still obsessed with calories; that has been a very important part of my success so I am not worried about that one. And I never looked at my body (ignorance is bliss?) before and hardly at all now - but every night when I am laying down I do feel my new bones, which I guess is pretty much the same thing.

I had a big problem with stepping on the scale in the beginning. Like 5+ times a day. As time carried on though, I figured out how pointless that was. I can gain and lose 9 pounds a day easily, just by what I have or haven't eaten and the time of day. So I came to a head-space where I could weigh once a day, but during the week, I know I am about 4 pounds heavier (I can only weigh first thing in the morning before I have to run out the door to work) so I don't worry about it overmuch. On my official weigh in days on Sunday I am still obsessive. Gotta be naked, has to be after 10:30 am, and I can't have eaten anything. That is my only REAL weight that I give much thought to now. It's taken almost 9 months to get here, but I am happy about it.

I also used to obsess on fantasies of how friends/family would react after they saw my for the first time in 7 months (I live many miles away from everyone in my family so only see them on special occasions). Every thought was about this, and I think it kept me on track to lose as much as possible. That big reveal day has come and went, so now I don't have a big moment to think too much about.

I feel I am in a really good mental state at this point, with only the calorie obsession in tact. It just takes time, and moving forward, allow your body room to do what it needs to do and not drive yourself crazy about it.

Good luck!

DixC Chix 10-29-2010 08:08 PM

Obsession thy name is weighing. At least it was for me.

I broke my obsession/habit by keeping a pencil and paper near the scale and wrote it down every time I got on that scale. It was when I saw in black and white concrete proof of just how obsessed I was that I scaled (;) groan) back from multiple times to just once a day. Same time every day. Once a day may bother some folks but I need to keep the number fresh in my head least I get the notion to stray.

Best Wishes with what ever works for you.

CourtneyDaisey 10-29-2010 09:10 PM

I am obsessed with weighing in as well. I weigh at least 6 times a day. I know I shouldn't but I do it anyway. I like to see how every nibble, every sip of water, every trip to the bathroom, and everything else affects my weight. You're definitely not alone.

Also....I have family on the Eastern Shore too mdchick88! They live in Cambridge and Easton!

matt_H 10-29-2010 10:04 PM

I'm still fairly obessive and I've been at this for a long time. I weigh twice a day (once at night to get a good idea what my morning weight might be and once in the morning). I also plan out my meals and get nervous when I don't know ahead of time what I will be having. I hate going to a restaurant where I can't look at the menu ahead of time and figure out what a healthy option will be.

I think there is healthy obsession and unhealthy obsession. It sounds like this is really a problem for you and interfering with you life. Maybe you can start just by making a rule that you only weigh in once a day? At one point I had to take my scale out of the bathroom and place it in the closet. I knew that I wouldn't feel like getting on it several times a day if it was in another location. Maybe you can start doing something like that?

Bac0s 10-30-2010 08:30 AM

I go through phases. I am always super obsessive (I guess you could say) about counting my calories. Now that I have a better idea about how many calories foods are, the obsession has decreased. I plan my day down to snacks the night before, and it seems to have removed the obsession from the food. I weigh myself all too frequently, and some days I really think about it, but at other times I find myself feeling very detached from the weigh-in process.

I've been doing this for about 4 months now, and for the most part it's all such an ingrained routine that I really don't spend that much time thinking about it. In the beginning, though, it was pretty much ALL I thought about.

Lori Bell 10-30-2010 09:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mdchick88 (Post 3544052)
When I go on a diet, or even just try to make a conscious effort to eat better, I get so obsessive. I count every single calorie, weigh myself at least 10 times a day, and spend every spare second trying to calculate how long it's going to take to lose weight....

And how's that been working out for you? ;)

If you keep doing what you have always done, you'll keep getting what you always got.

You know, there was a time I was a lot like you. This time around I decided I was going to do EVERYTHING different, because obviously the way I had always done it never worked for the long haul. First, during the losing stage of my healthy diet, I weighed myself once a week. Period. I knew there would be a loss every week because I didn't cheat. I took the control away from the scale and the food.

I also didn't set up ANY time lines. I remember in the old days spending hours making charts and graphs and the first bite of sugar and I was "Done". This time I didn't care how long, I just cared that it was forever.

I hope you can get over the obsession, because it really isn't worth it. All it does is make your life miserable. Find other things to fill your time. House work, home work, walking, helping old people. You are wasting valuable time on stuff that isn't going to help you one bit. Weighing 10 times a day is doing NOTHING for anyone. Nothing.


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