Have you tried calorie counting - giving it 150 percent? Have you tried sitting there and measuring? Have you tried NOT being lazy.

Have you tried starting your own accountability thread and posting what you eat every single day? No matter what?

Have you tried not putting anything in your mouth till it goes on paper first? No matter what.

Have you tried looking for reasons that you can and should do this, instead of looking for reasons why you can't do this.

Have you taken a "I'm going to do this" attitude, "whatever it takes, I'm going to push myself and push myself'?

Have you tried re-thinking what a treat is? Instead of cakes, cookies, ice cream, etc - how about a fat free yogurt, which you partially freeze, adding in some Fiber One cereal - one of my favorite *treats*. I eat several of them a day. Or a big bowl of veggie soup. A veggie stir fry. Blueberries. A baked apple with sugar free maple syrup, walnuts, and raisins, a poached pear. 20 calorie hot chocolate. Have you tried being super creative, thinking outside the box?

And then there's the true treats. It sounds as if you're afraid of giving up *treats*. I don't mean to be insensitive here, but why aren't you concerned with all the treats that you are giving up by remaining obese? - treats that last all day long and into the night. Not ones that just last for a few minutes. That would be the treat of being a healthy weight. The treat of great doctors visits. The treat of accomplishment. The treat of added energy, stamina, vitality, self confidence, self worth, self respect. The treat of being light and free and not having to worry about fitting into chairs and tight spaces. The treat of having a FABULOUS, extensive wardrobe and playing dress up every single day of the year. The treat of being the very best you possible and living up to your full potential. The treat of knowing that you have done all you can on your part to stave off some horrific, debilitating and deadly diseases. The treat of collarbones and hip bones and muscles. The treat of walking up a flight of stairs without getting winded. The treat of less worries and more joy. :)

I know exactly what you mean...giving in to the pure desire of wanting that McFlurry (so much that it's all you've thought about for hours) and you've eaten four cookies in the meantime to make up for not eating the McFlurry in the first place.

I hate food too! But, I really love food. Somehow, I have to make food mean less to me and approach eating with a healthy mind set. It's easier said than done and I've tried and tried and tried so many times. I do great then fall off the wagon with a deafening thud. I also am great at telling myself "I'll start tomorrow...I'm going to eat this one more time then tomorrow I'll be perfect!" If I only lost an ounce for every time I've said that to myself...I'd be my goal weight, I'm sure!

I decided to do something I have never done before and didn't know much about until recently. A week ago, I saw a doctor who is starting a weight management program using meal replacements. We talked about different options and we talked A LOT about my behaviors, triggers, responses to food, etc. and decided that the path for me would be replacing meals for a while with liquid nutrition (shakes, soups, puddings that you purchase from the office).

I am on day 6 and I am hungry but I am not obsessing about food for once in my life and it feels good. I don't have to think about it for a while and that feels really good. Now, that being said, one cannot (or should not) live on these meal replacements forever. The program requires therapy - nutrition, behavioral and fitness. In a few short weeks I'll be replacing the meal replacements with regular food. I have a lot of work to do before that time comes! I have come to realize that I need to understand why food plays such a major role in my life and how I can control food, instead of food controlling me.

The doctor also said something that made sense to me: "You will fall off track. Everyone falls off track. We can't be perfect all the time...it's just not going to happen. It's how long you stay off track that matters." The goal is to develop tools and strategies for realizing when I'm off track and closing the gap between being off track and getting back on. Instead of allowing the free-fall into self-indulgence, and adopting the "tomorrow" attitude, I need to learn to move on and leave the bad behavior behind.

I am excited, encouraged, scared, and did I mention hungry?? But, most of all, I feel like I'm in control again. I have my first group therapy session tomorrow and am looking forward to hearing from others who are going through this too.

I didn't post to convince anyone to try this type of diet...just to empathize! I know this love / hate relationship with food and know how hard it is.

ROBIN ~ Oh, I so loved your responses here tonight; and am keeping them for future reference as well. I made a wrong choice today -- but you slapped my hand with your words, so I will do better next time and listen to my intuition which did warn me to make that lunch ahead just in case ... :dizzy:


GLORY ~ Love that idea -- I am going to do the note thing with my DH too becuz I did the exact same thing today ... and have been so annoyed with myself ever since. Back on track for dinner and onward ho ... :D


PINK HOODIE ~ I think we ask our S/O's to go buy junk for us to deflect the blame away from ourselves ... but we are really just sabotaging ourselves!!! Just continue on, and guestimate the calories and you will be OK; and ...

Maybe saying "NO" to yourself is your nemesis ... try saying "YES" to yourself ... yes, I can have a nuked apple with cinnamon & NSA maple syrup ... yes, I can have no sugar chocolate pudding ... yes, I can have a pita pizza ... yes, I can have a yummy lemon yogurt with a tbl chopped nuts ... yes, I can have an ounce of dark chocolate ... yes, I can have a granola fiber bar for a snack ... yes, I can have my favorite family dinner that is lean and healthy ...

And yes, like the previous poster says, you will make mistakes like I did today, but you will get better at it with time. Don't give up just becuz you had one McFlurry or whatever you gave in to; keep on, keepin' on for the rest of the day, week, month and you will get and be healthier ... :hug:

i vote for the therapy! It saved my life. I was a spoiled brat when it came to food ***oooh something delicious i must have it, i'm awesome so i should be able to eat THREE of them *** LOL i'm not even kidding! I'm a psychologist by profession so I believe in therapy but I couldn't do it myself. THAT was very hard to admit. So I went to someone I could trust, talked about life and what i want from it, what my patterns and habits were etc., and I basically beat that little snotty brat into submission ;) My hat's off to those who can do this whole thing without addressing the underlying causes, but it never worked for this girl, that's for sure! I committed to a 'diet' almost every monday of my adult life and where'd it get me?? 300 plus pounds that's where :( Who'da thunk TALKING helped me lose weight more than eating/exercise combined! woot!

TRAZEY ~ I believe that -- and wish that there were more food or ED therapists out there to talk to ... our family was very poor and their idea of a reward was to "TREAT" ourselves with our favorite junk foods ... not a good idea at all ... and I watched my mother "console" and "reward" herself with chips & dip & pop & ice cream that she had hidden in a secret stash ... my parents even had a special little room for this ... :dizzy:

Like ROBIN says, I have to find better "treats" ... ones that will reward me with good health!

I'm from a family where food was a reward, usually very sugary stuff; also a consolation; also a way of showing love, withholding love, a weapon(I made this for you specially and you're not eating it).

The way I have control of it now is the 'not eating it 'til I've written it' route. With logging it electronically, there were times in the early days when I'd write it, find that took me over the limit, so I didn't eat it. Somehow, the planning and the logging has given me the power - I honestly can't remember the last time I had a craving. 114 days on plan.

At first, I measured happiness by the scale; then by the few clothes that began to fit better. Now I measure happiness because when I see myself in the mirror, I stop and look again: my face has emerged from its chinstrap of fat; in clothes I look good; picking up on another thread this morning, I carry myself better - at a family party (lunch! see, food for everything!) I even wore a pair of mild heels for the first time in years (with a couple of large pain killers to keep the neuroma at bay). That sort of craving has become the norm for me.

The only wait to this and beyond to goal, though, comes from hours, days, weeks of diligent groundwork. It's like having to learn to play scales on the piano before you can play a piece properly. Choosing between Chopin or Chopsticks.

Good luck!

Hey there Pink Hoodie. You've gotten quite a bit of responses after your last post on this thread. And I was just hoping you got some perspective and some ideas and what you thought of them. I was curious to know how you are doing. I hope it is well. :)

I hate food too. I had to flip my relationship with it completely upside down. Food will not make me happy. Food will not pay my bills. Eating a *fill in the blank* will not help me DO ANYTHING in my life that's worth doing. The momentary pleasure of eating that THING is not worth the long term guilt or pounds.

Food is fuel. You eat food so your body can function, take you places, help you accomplish your goals. I don't eat food to reward myself. I don't eat food to feel pleasure. There are other things in life that I can use for that (that won't make me fat).

It's hard. It's not fun... but at the end of the day you HAVE to gain some power over your food. I don't eat anything that's not going to feed my body and add to my health. The benefit is no longer there for me.

Some people think I'm missing out... but eh. I was missing out by letting myself become morbidly obese. I'd rather miss out in this way any day!!!

The McFlurry is SOO SO SO SOOOO not worth it!

ETA: Not to say that all I eat is boiled chicken breast and raw veggies... My food is delicious, don't get me wrong! It's just not the same empty crap I was eating before.