Originally Posted by :
ubergirl originally posted But the reality is that the positive wonderful incredible changes kick in LONG before you hit your goal.

I'm your height and still 35-40 pounds above my goal, but because I'm very fit, people are already starting to say that I look I can't lose any more....

Even if I parked right here at 207 I am 100 x more attractive, confident, healthy, and fit than I was at 295.

YES!!! I feel the same way. Even if I maintain right here, I feel and look so much better!

I never ever ever ever in a million years thought that I ... starting at almost 400 pounds could get below 300 pounds.

There was no way.

and then when I did... I KNEW I couldn't get below 200 pounds...

and then I did.

And now I know I can't get to 150 pounds...

but I will ;)

Why?

Because I DON'T GIVE UP. Ever. if I slip I get right back on track. Each and every single time. Have I been off plan for 1,2,3 days? Yes I have. Have I been off plan for longer than that... no. Never.

Have I made bad food choices spur of the moment? yes.
Do I regret them? Yes.
Do I GET BACK ON PLAN??? YES.

You CAN DO THIS.

You won't be perfect. No one is perfect. Ever. Eventually you will slip up (I did) and knowing that you need to GET BACK ON PLAN ASAP is the key. One, two, 10 slips won't kill this... STAYING off plan will.

Come here every single day. We'll help you. You can help us. Every single time someone new with all of their wonderful energy and sticktuitiveness comes to the group it's a new beginning for ALL of us!!!

Happy to have you here!

I still have a long way to go, but before I found 3fc, I never even dreamed of losing 100 lbs, even more. Oh, I had made a plan to lose and I was determined to succeed this time. But my plan was a lot less ambitious - I thought I'd get down to somewhere around 180, maybe even 175 or so. I've been there or pretty close about 10 years ago. I honestly don't remember the number on the scale, but I was wearing 16s and even a few 14s and this was before current size inflation, so I'd probably be about an easy 14 with a few 12s now at the same size. I felt good and looked pretty good too but I never pushed myself harder, to take it to the next level and achieve a truly healthy size and fitness level.

And this time, because of the inspiration of so many others (esp. some of the people who posted on this thread already!) , I am pushing myself to do this once and for all. I am trying to be realistic about the timeframe - not as an excuse to not push myself harder, but to allow myself to appreciate all of my successes and not be disappointed if I "only" lose 5 lbs in a set time period instead of 10. And more importantly, to know even if I have setbacks, I just pick myself right back up and keep going. A little secret I've learned from lurking on the maintenance thread is that even many maintainers have setbacks too - they may regain 5 or 10 lbs and have to get that back off. But they don't allow that 10 lbs to turn into 25 and 50 and more. And I'm not going to either, not in maintenance and not on my way there.

So my answer is that yes, it really is possible. I believe that for myself, and I believe it for you too!

This is my mantra from the last few days as I struggle with the same question. (and I might have read it here, I have been racking my brain on where I read this quote)

"If you don't have confidence, you will always find an excuse to fail."

I'd also like to say to all the maintainers and big losers, thank you for continuing to post here after you reach goal. I see it as a generous act to set an example and to give advice that worked for you to those of us who need to hear it over and over again.

It is entirely possible. Lots of people have already told you that, but what the heck, I'll throw in, because I'm closing in on 190 pounds lost and my final goal, and I occasionally find myself kind of gobsmacked by having got to where I currently am now. Seriously, I sometimes wonder, how on earth did I do this? Why have I stuck it so long?

And then I remember. I sort of hate the expression 'lifestyle change,' but that's exactly what I had to do, and did. I took my strengths; I'm smart, I'm a really good cook, I enjoy learning new things, I focus well. So I put my brains, my skills, my thirst for knowledge and a lot of my attention to work on how best to change my lifestyle. The first few weeks of the change, I had to really call on all my reserves of self-control, while I got my new habits established. I had to tell myself no, over and over again, until eventually it became reflexive to avoid the pitfalls I'd spent the previous years throwing myself into with abandon. Now, after all this time -- and it does take time to lose 185+ pounds, no matter how stringent you are in your plan -- it's pretty automatic for me. I really don't go off plan very often, because I know what it will do to me. I know how easy it is to slip back into those terrible old habits. When I do go off plan, it's very seldom worth it, because remorse tastes awful. ;)

I really can't add much more to the other great posts in this thread, but yes, it CAN be done, but it takes a lot more than just wanting it and wishing for it. I'm quoting rockin' robin here, because, in my experience, she's totally right about this: you have to decide to do it, and then do it.

Great post, Robin.

I agree with cfmama in that at well over 400 lbs to start, I did not know exactly what was possible, but I completely changed my eating and exercise and was consistent, and saw results. For some time before I started this journey, I would read about others' success and would hope for that to happen to me. One day, I made the changes, and realized that it is not about hoping or wishing for this to happen to me, but actually doing it. This has been the most rewarding thing ever for me, and continues to be. It can happen to you, and believe in yourself, but you have to put in the work. If you are consistent with that, results will follow. I wish you all the best.

Originally Posted by ledom:

I'd also like to say to all the maintainers and big losers, thank you for continuing to post here after you reach goal. I see it as a generous act to set an example and to give advice that worked for you to those of us who need to hear it over and over again.

A couple of things about this.

First of all, I have a burning, burning, almost insatiable desire for everyone to KNOW that it is possible, because like I said for decades I didn't think that it was. I wish someone would have sat down and told me, that yes it IS possible. That yes, I COULD do it. That it was indeed a doable thing. Not rocket science. Not some hare-brained ludicrous outrageous scheme. So I have this incredible NEED to let people know that. Because I believe that it really did stop me. Plus I want EVERYONE to know just how wonderful it is, how worth it is. I always knew it would be great to be slim and trim, but I swear I never had a clue it would be *this* wonderful. I'm fairly certain I would have done it earlier had I known.

And ummm, another thing, confession time - its not all about giving back to others - staying here and participating helps ME as well. Because yes, I lost the weight, but that's not good enough - I lost it and have no intention of gaining it back. Being with like minded people is a great help to me now that I'm maintaining my loss (almost 3 years, I can't believe it).

And ubergirl brought up a good point, doesn't she always - you will start to feel marvelous waaaay before hitting your goal. It may take a while to start reaping those benefits, though I had added energy the second I got rid of the carbs and sugar, but when those rewards start surfacing, and again, long before hitting goal, it is QUITE the ride. Hold on to your seat and be prepared to be blown away. :smug:

I think when I started to change my life, two years ago, that I didn't really think at all about the fact that I needed (and perhaps wanted) to lose 150 pounds. What I did instead was I made behavioral changes, one at a time, committing to each new change for a period of time. Just 30 days. I'd say to myself, "I think I'm going to quit coffee. I'm pretty sure I can do that, since I've done it before. I'm going to do it for 30 days and see what happens. After that, if I want to drink coffee again, well then I will."

I quit coffee first. After 30 days I didn't really want to pick it back up again--I found I didn't need it (even though I do still love it), and quitting it meant I slept better, which meant I felt a lot better.

Then I quit sugar and white refined stuff. Just for 30 days. But after 30 days I felt about 1000% better. I looked about 1000% better too, due to my skin clearing up. And hey, I'd actually lost some weight, bonus!

Then I started exercising. This was a few months in, and at that point, I wasn't really thinking in 30-day chunks anymore...I was just looking for further changes to improve my health and well-being.

Later I decided I would see what counting calories could do for me--that was about 9 months in.

And so on, and so forth. Fast-forward to a month ago, when I decided (after slacking on exercise for nearly a year) that I'd challenge myself for 30 days to get up at 6 am and work out, every single day, including weekends. Well, I'm almost done with that challenge, and I love the results, so I'll keep going with it.

I still don't think in terms of the overall quantity of weight I want to lose, partly because I'm not really sure where I'll decide to stop. Maybe 170 will be right for me, or 159, or 145. I don't know, and that is OK. All I need to do today is to keep on with the good habits I have established, and be hunting for my next good habit to instill.

Warmaiden, you need to be a sticky! :) That's an amazing start down this path!! I can't think of a wiser approach. I'm very impressed. :D

...heck, this whole thread ought to be a sticky. It has me a little teary, and I'm not an emotional person. :rolleyes:

Thank you, Eliana, that's very kind and sweet.

I could add that in prior "weight loss attempts" and "diets," what I did was try to change everything that I thought was wrong about my life, all at once. And/or I tried to be "moderate" about my addiction to sugar.

Neither of those strategies works for me. For one thing, it's not possible to be moderate about an addiction, that's why they call it an addiction! So using my "it's just 30 days, let's see what happens" strategy meant that I quit sugar, and then I could get some freedom and distance from the addiction--some control over it.

And as to changing everything at once, well, I just found that to be exhausting and overwhelming. I wasn't able to immediately go from eating no veggies, to eating veggies at every meal. Nor was I capable of starting a vigorous exercise regimen while also getting to bed on time while also eating right while also etc etc etc. Making incremental changes meant that I could face one habit demon at a time.

Now, that being said, other people (rockinrobin, for example) do really well with making a bunch of changes all at once. She wanted fast, major change, and so she made it happen for herself. She was able to handle that kind of beneficial upheaval in her life.

As always, we each have to find the strategy that works best for us individually.

Lots and lots of great info on this thread... I would just agree that you should try to focus on smaller goals. It can be overwhelming to think about how far you have to go to get to goal.

My next mini-goal is 204 (half way to goal)... after that it'll be 199... then 189... then probably 175.. 165... 160... and so on...

Yes, it is very possible. Never ever give up on yourself and your health, you are worth it! Good luck with your goals :hug:

Originally Posted by WarMaiden:
Now, that being said, other people (rockinrobin, for example) do really well with making a bunch of changes all at once. She wanted fast, major change, and so she made it happen for herself. She was able to handle that kind of beneficial upheaval in her life.

As always, we each have to find the strategy that works best for us individually.

Yes, I did make a bunch of changes at once. But I gotta tell you, your post, your way of implementing those changes - VERY inspiring and very wise - for you and probably MANY others as well. I haven't heard that from you yet and I'm glad that now I have.

I hear all the time about people taking baby steps, but I don't believe that your way was baby steps. I loved what you said about moderation. It's SO true and I agree totally. So we may have not been all that different than you think about our approaches, we just may be calling it/looking at it differently.

For me, I had to shut the doors. Because I tell you, once I left it open a crack, it swung WIDE open. I was done taking chances. I really, really felt like my life was on the line, ummm, because it WAS. It was. I was fearful for my life. *This* time HAD to be different. I had to clean up my environment. I'm that alcoholic, you can't take away my vodka by giving me beer instead. Wouldn't have worked.

Folks, find YOUR way and if that way doesn't work - try another and another. But keep in mind it's not only about it working for you - but you've GOT TO BE WILLING TO MAKE SOMETHING WORK. Take a deep hard look at yourselves and think, really think what you are WILLING to do to get to your goals. And be open to tweaking it as you go along. Get started. Get started. Push yourselves. Work past the initial discomfort stage. I look back and think when I started my *diet* on a Monday and was done with it come Friday, if only I had NOT given into that pizza or ice cream or fried what have you, if only I had pushed through that Friday and Saturday and Sunday - it would have made all the difference. Work past the initial discomfort. THAT'S a big key here. Recognize that it WILL be uncomfortable - initially. But KNOW that it is temporary and it has the biggest most amazing pay off.

AMAZE yourself with all that you can accomplish and are capable of.

Also - don't think of all that you are giving up (the high quantity/high calorie foods), but instead focus on what you will be GAINING.

I had horrendous, absolutely HORRENDOUS eating habits, and now this healthy lifestyle is fully ingrained in me. It is automatic. And I LOVE IT!!!!

Originally Posted by rockinrobin:
Yes, I did make a bunch of changes at once. But I gotta tell you, your post, your way of implementing those changes - VERY inspiring and very wise - for you and probably MANY others as well. I haven't heard that from you yet and I'm glad that now I have.

I hear all the time about people taking baby steps, but I don't believe that your way was baby steps. I loved what you said about moderation. It's SO true and I agree totally. So we may have not been all that different than you think about our approaches, we just may be calling it/looking at it differently.

For me, I had to shut the doors. Because I tell you, once I left it open a crack, it swung WIDE open. I was done taking chances. I really, really felt like my life was on the line, ummm, because it WAS. It was. I was fearful for my life. *This* time HAD to be different. I had to clean up my environment. I'm that alcoholic, you can't take away my vodka by giving me beer instead. Wouldn't have worked.

Folks, find YOUR way and if that way doesn't work - try another and another. But keep in mind it's not only about it working for you - but you've GOT TO BE WILLING TO MAKE SOMETHING WORK. Take a deep hard look at yourselves and think, really think what you are WILLING to do to get to your goals. And be open to tweaking it as you go along. Get started. Get started. Push yourselves. Work past the initial discomfort stage. I look back and think when I started my *diet* on a Monday and was done with it come Friday, if only I had NOT given into that pizza or ice cream or fried what have you, if only I had pushed through that Friday and Saturday and Sunday - it would have made all the difference. Work past the initial discomfort. THAT'S a big key here. Recognize that it WILL be uncomfortable - initially. But KNOW that it is temporary and it has the biggest most amazing pay off.

AMAZE yourself with all that you can accomplish and are capable of.

Also - don't think of all that you are giving up (the high quantity/high calorie foods), but instead focus on what you will be GAINING.

I had horrendous, absolutely HORRENDOUS eating habits, and now this healthy lifestyle is fully ingrained in me. It is automatic. And I LOVE IT!!!!

Robin-- you've outdone yourself! Every single word you wrote here is true, true, true!!!

Yesterday, I had the most unbelievably awful day at work. When I got home, I ordered pizza for the kids.

But for me and DH, I made grilled Tilapia with sauteed asparagus and mushrooms. When I sat down to eat, the food looked so fresh and appealing, and so FAMILIAR, that it really comforted me.

I used to handle stress one way-- by eating junk food that made me feel sick.

Now, I feel so much more normal, because I have all these other ways, like exercising, and eating healthy food, and relaxing and letting stuff go.

I never thought I could be comforted by those kinds of things-- but they are so much better comfort, that I realized how much better I handle stress now in general.

That is certainly no hardship whatsoever. It is a huge blessing.