that this time it's actually real.

I haven't been feeling hungry, I've been exercising, cutting portions and becoming aware of calories, and I'm losing weight. In all my previous weight loss attempts I haven't made it to 230, but here I sit at 230 and full after breakfast, almost ready to go to a meeting.

Even though I've been "walking the walk" over the last fortnight, and have been cheering myself and others here on 3fc on...it hasn't felt "real". It hasn't felt like this will actually be the crucial turning point in my life where I get down to a healthy weight for my height and build.

But yesterday I got back from training and something seemed to shift in my head. I've been trying to take control of various things in my life - small things - but have I somehow also taken control of the big pink elephant that is my weight? And is that actually going to work this time? Like, really? Am I, in a year's time, actually going to be lighter, healthier, slimmer?

Wow. Because that would be very cool.

This was my random brain dump...and 3fc was the only place I could put it where there'd be a chance of people understanding.

Oh yes, it IS going to work - you've got a lot less elephant already!

I absolutly get it! And I kind of wake up every now and then and think..."oh, am I doing this, like realy?". Even after 10lbs, and 20lbs and I'll do it at 50lbs. I supose one day I'll wake up and think "gee, I guess I did do it."

You are on your way... I know what you mean. It kind of takes you by surprise. I think it's great that you are working on little things in your life, including your health. I think weight loss has a lot more to do with just the weight part so it is great that you are looking outside the bubble too. Keep up the great work!

I know that feeling.. it's new to me. I don't think I fully understand YET, but 12 lbs for me is still kinda unbelievable. Congratulations on your success so far.. you're doing this!! Keep it up girl!!

I totally get it. You WILL do this Good feeling huh?

Thanks, ladies, so much for your replies.

It's still so weird to me. I think I've lived much if not all of my life just "coasting" - waiting for the next thing to come along. Taking control of stuff was, I suppose, just too scary - what happens if I fail? Everyone will laugh...

...and I guess in some ways I'm still scared that people will laugh. It all seems so irrational, perhaps. And then I look at myself and see that I seem to have taken control (or at least started - I'm less than 20lbs in...) of this thing that's been haunting me for so long, and I think, "Woah, where did you come from?"

Or maybe I just have multiple personalities? Iono.

Gah. Major confusion here. I hope you don't mind.

Yes, this is real. In a year's time you will be lighter, healthier, slimmer. Tell yourself that.

I have found that, sometimes in life, it is better to put my feelings aside and let my brain rule. When dealing with weight loss, my brain needs to be in charge. My feelings are too volatile for this. If I let my feelings be the boss, sometimes I feel impatient which leads to discouragement which leads to......

My brain tells me, "OK, here's the plan. Follow it and you will lose weight."

Don't let your feelings rule you. YOU can do this!

I definitely get it, this is my first successful weight drop too, and something just shifted in my head where I KNEW, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I would never become the size I started out again. Even if I gain a bit, which is inevitable as I will be having more children, I will never mindlessly bloat up again. I am never going to wake up 250 pounds again. I love my new lifestyle and have no desire or reason to change it, it's ME! And because this is me, now, I just know I will keep conquering and improving my health.

As they say on here, fake it 'til you make it. You've done marvelously - just keep plugging away and never give up!

I totally get it too...!

You are totally doing this!!! Awesome!!!

You are doing this! And you will become slimmer over the next weeks and months.

TimeToLose - I really liked what you said about having the Brain rule weight loss! Thanks!