I think I have, at best, not lost any weight this week and I'm pretty sure I've put on a pound or two.
It's just been a crazy week. I do not want to make excuses but I do want to share what I've learned and ask for some advice along the way.
Bad choice #1: Youngest son wanted to eat out. I divided my meal in half and took the other half home. I was thinking one of my other sons would enjoy it later that evening but he didn't come home that night. So.....as I sat there watching TV (that room is open to the kitchen) I could hearing it calling me so I reheated it and ate it. Which brings me to....
Bad choice #2: In the evening I just need to stay out of that room! It seems everytime I'm there watching tv I ended up snacking! Since I have a tv in my room upstairs I have decided that is where I need to spend my evenings! It's amazing to me how just the proximity to the fridge increases my hunger?!?!
Bad Choice #3: Stress overeating. Scenario: I spent a couple of days with a friends DH who is dying of brain cancer. He is still at home and on many days does well but this week he had wandered outside and left the barn doors and gates open. She doesn't want him left alone (while she is at work) so I volunteered to stay with him on the two weekdays she was working. She has found someone who can start coming in next week so I won't be doing that again but on one of the days I was there she called to check in and was very angry at her DH because he had asked me to walk the dogs--no biggie to me, I like her dogs. Anyway, he was cranky for the rest of the day and when she got home we talked and it was all good. She was just stressing because she was having a tough day at work and it spilled over into their conversation. I spend time telling you this lenghty story because I can see so clearly how others peoples stress spills over into other peoples lives. There is NO getting around that! However, I could use some coping skills in this area and I'm very open to suggestions on that one. I can't begin to tell you how I overate that evening!
This last one is not really a 'bad choice" but I could use some advice because this is going to come up all the time. I had a meeting at my house last night for our neighborhood watch. One of my sweet neighbors offered to make a goodie for our mtg. Great, one less thing I have to do. I had no idea she would bring 3 full pans of goodies. And because there was sooooo much left over she wanted me to keep it for my boys. Well, they're not here as much since college has started, one just left, one lives on his own. And frankly, none of them are big sweet eaters anyway. So we all feel pressured to 'take something' home even though it's pretty apparent most of us don't want to. I immediately threw away what small amount I had taken. I don't feel bad about that, although I certainly would never want her to know. I did have one very small lemon square at the meeting and many glasses of water. She's a good cook!
Anyway, with the holidays coming up and my slips this week I'm starting to hear that conversation in my head that says I can't do this. It's just a bit of a whisper at this point but I sure could use some words of wisdom to nip this in the bud. I will say, strangely enough, I am trying to learn what works, I am trying to identify my triggers and come up with coping skills. I am NOT going to beat myself up over a bad week--no name calling. With all the activity this week I only missed one work out but I kind of knew that was coming so I doubled my treadmill walked one evening and I'll probably workout a little extra this weekend.
I don't want to hit that wall where I'm this close to quiting. Is that possible or is that just part of this journey? I guess I'm asking for advice to help me NOT go there. Am I in time??? Or have I already gone there???
Thanks guys for listening!