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-   -   Feel like a fraud? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-lb-club/158351-feel-like-fraud.html)

skinnyinsideout 12-10-2008 08:22 PM

Feel like a fraud?
 
So, I am officially wearing a size 12 - for real! I even bought a size 12 in Levi jeans - which is a huge thing for me - but this isn't about that.......

I keep feeling like a sales clerk is going to come up and tap me on my shoulder and ask me why I'm shopping in the normal sized store. Like I went in Ann Taylor Loft and felt like I was SO OBVIOUSLY out of place, but I wasn't - the clothes fit! Do any of you who used to have to shop in only plus sized stores feel out of place in the other stores now? I don't even know what to buy for my new body - I'm SO out of fashion! I really thought I would sing from the hilltops when I left Lane Bryant for good, but now I'm skulking around the mall - not sure where I fit in (no pun intended - haha!)

Any of this familiar?

Thighs Be Gone 12-10-2008 08:26 PM

skinny..yes! OMG, I totally know what you are going through. It does get better. If you have a fashionable friend, she/he may be of help. I had a friend go with me. When we first went to Banana Republic I pulled a creme colored coat from the rack in an XL. She immediately asked, "how come you got that big thing?!" I was just so accustomed to always reaching for the big one. I ended up with the MEDIUM! Anyway, she really got me out of my comfort zone. Like you, I didn't know fashion either. I tried on a ton that day and she helped me mix and match and all that--lots of fun--Charlotte Russe, Forever 21, Chicoholic and the list goes on. I have been hitting the stores pretty hard ever since.

mandalinn82 12-10-2008 08:27 PM

Oh yes. And it takes time to adjust to. Considerable time. I still don't believe my size labels, and I've been maintaining over a year.

You'll get into a groove of it, though...and soon the twinges of "I don't belong here!" will be less and less frequent.

JulieJ08 12-10-2008 08:27 PM

Yeah, a little bit, but I'm getting over it ;) Might be different, because I did used to wear a size 8. But that was 10 years ago.

Schumeany 12-10-2008 09:16 PM

OK, so how is THIS for feeling really odd. About a week ago, I went into Coldwater Creek and fell in love with a little suede jacket...but they didn't have any SMALL enough for me. Holy Crap!!!! Even six months ago I could not have imagined that EVER happening to me...it actually sort of freaked me out. They had to order an X-Small one for me from another store. In June, I wore a Size 16! I couldn't decide whether to start dancing or go eat ice cream. What I did instead was go get my body fat measured...just to make sure I was judging what I look like accurately because I don't feel THAT thin (20.4%...still plenty healthy). X-Small...who would have thunk it. :)

kelly315 12-10-2008 09:34 PM

arg, I feel that way all the time in stores, even when I was thinner. It's hard to just relax and enjoy yourself when you feel like you're somewhere you don't belong. But I know that it's totally ridiculous!

fiberlover 12-10-2008 11:17 PM

It still feels so out of place knowing that I can grab mediums off a rack and have them fit.

I keep expecting someone to yell - "The women's sizes are over *there*!"


The newness is fun though - I know other people who don't squeal with excitement over putting on pants like I do now LOL!

foxxy511 12-10-2008 11:19 PM

I'm with ya! Last Saturday, I needed a long-sleeved blue shirt, but at JCPenney (where I work) they only had ones in L and M. I used to be at an XXL and I've dropped down to buying XL, but I didn't think I could possibly fit into a L. My friend convinced me to try the L on and, lo and behold, it actually fit! I was shocked. I feel like a fraud wearing my size 12 jeans too. I feel like I shouldn't be able to fit in them...yet I do. I'm still too scared to go into any "normal size" clothing stores. I stick to JCP and Target, lol.

H8cake 12-10-2008 11:44 PM

I am so afraid someone will try to direct me to the plus size section too. I look at the size 12 jeans and I know they fit because I have three pairs, but I still am afraid they won't go all the way up. I always tell myself, "it's okay if they don't fit, just try them anyway to see" every time I try on something in a store. I feel like everyone is watching me when I'm looking at normal sized clothes. It's quite surreal! What is really funny is to be 44 years old and thinner and cruise thru the juniors section. I feel like those young girls are going to laugh so I don't stay there long. I need to lose more, but I'm having a hard time even fathoming going smaller than a size 12 since that's what I wore in high school and didn't think of myself as fat then. I know about the vanity sizing, but it's still hard to get past the number. I'm a big bottomed girl so having a smaller bum is really hard to imagine.

rodeogirl 12-11-2008 03:04 AM

I'm not yet in the normal store range but I plan to go to Old Navy with my niece next week and I'm going to buy something I like - I don't know what. And I'm going to put it in my closet and someday it will fit and when that happens I'm going back to Old Navy to find some more clothes.

skinnyinsideout 12-11-2008 07:07 AM

Thanks for the replys - I thought I was the only one crazy enough to think these thoughts. What weird mental things go along with this fat!


H8cake -That's so funny what you said about the juniors section - I've been cruising Forever 21 and JUST know the storeclerks are giggling behind my back - and when I go into Hollister or American Eagle for my daughter I don't even think to look for anything for myself because it would never fit - right?! :)

mezmerize 12-11-2008 07:51 AM

I can so relate. I went shopping for new jeans since my 14 are getting baggy. I'm thinking these 14 must run big. So I grab a few size 12 they fit fine. Then I accidently grabbed a size 10. I was in the dressing room and abou to ask the clerk to grab me a size 12 but thought there is no one to see me try these on and fail. Well guess what I didn't fail! They went up and even zipped a tiny bit hard but not horrible. I was so happy! I stepped out to look in the 3 way mirror and the sales lady said those look good you have skinny legs like me. I have never heard I have skinny legs in my life. Even when I was thin. I biked alot so I've always seen them as large. I said well I think these might run large. I bought them along with 2 size 12 jeans. The 10 are going to be my goal jeans. I want to zip them up with out sucking in. You know when I 1st walked into the store I went to the plus sizes. Old habits are hard to break.

ChocLabLover 12-11-2008 08:49 AM

I am facing this feeling now as well. I took baby steps a few weeks ago and bought pajamas in a regular lingerie store, and they fit fine. Now I need to find a new pair of jeans. I embarrased to say I have NO clue on where to go as I have only been shopping in plus size stores for so many years. I had forgotted what it was like to have so many options.

Thighs Be Gone 12-11-2008 09:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by H8cake (Post 2491855)
I am so afraid someone will try to direct me to the plus size section too. I look at the size 12 jeans and I know they fit because I have three pairs, but I still am afraid they won't go all the way up. I always tell myself, "it's okay if they don't fit, just try them anyway to see" every time I try on something in a store. I feel like everyone is watching me when I'm looking at normal sized clothes. It's quite surreal! What is really funny is to be 44 years old and thinner and cruise thru the juniors section. I feel like those young girls are going to laugh so I don't stay there long. I need to lose more, but I'm having a hard time even fathoming going smaller than a size 12 since that's what I wore in high school and didn't think of myself as fat then. I know about the vanity sizing, but it's still hard to get past the number. I'm a big bottomed girl so having a smaller bum is really hard to imagine.



You sound like me. I feel somewhat insecure when I am shopping alongside someone looking at larger sizes while I flip through the size 8's. I have been them for so very long I don't know what to make of being the smaller one for a change. ROFL, yes--OMG on the Junior dept. I do the same thing when I am in that area of the store or in one of the "young" shops. I am waiting for someone to ask, "who are you shopping for?" ROFL

Thighs Be Gone 12-11-2008 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rodeogirl (Post 2491975)
I'm not yet in the normal store range but I plan to go to Old Navy with my niece next week and I'm going to buy something I like - I don't know what. And I'm going to put it in my closet and someday it will fit and when that happens I'm going back to Old Navy to find some more clothes.


OMG..I just did this too. I bought a totally HAWWWT blouse at Charlotte Russe last month. It is very thin and sheer and has a fitted band around the bottom. It is basically my "goal" shirt. When I can wear that shirt and look HAWT in it, I will know I have hit goal!


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