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Old 03-03-2008, 04:44 AM   #1
DollyR's Avatar
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Seoul, South Korea
Posts: 740

S/C/G: GW - 145

Height: 5'6"

Unhappy Ramblings of a Fat Girl...

I am struggling. I have stayed around 266 for a while. I want to get back on track and lose weight but I guess I am feeling sorry for myself lately. I have the break up to blame...the winter to blame....working too hard to blame...you ladies know how it goes. I spend a lot of time blaming when I could be doing something. I have gained 27 pounds in 5 years here overseas and I am not sure what to do about it.

I have the best diet book library in the world with books on everything to do with eating and being healthy yet I can't seem to get anywhere. I can't seem to get a grip on it all.

I know what I can do but I just don't....maybe it is laziness or love of food or something else....I wish I could just wake up one day and get the spark. I promised myself if I did one more year here I would move to Europe next year with a different attitude and a new out look.

I have a gym membership and should just get back in there.....

Say a prayer...mantra or what ever works for you ....ask that I get the spark and guidance from within to get on track.....
SW 303/ CW 297/ GW 145
Starting Feb. 20, 2017, Following Keto
10% Goal 270 or 122kgs.

FIRST GOAL: Hoping for 33 pounds (14.9 kgs) gone by June 1, 2017. as of Feb 25 only 27 more to go!
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Old 03-03-2008, 05:19 AM   #2
gonna win the thin!
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Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: seattle washington
Posts: 222

S/C/G: 270/see ticker/160

Height: 5 feet 5 inches


you will start again when you are ready and not a moment before.
however part of being ready is getting back your motivation. get a plan and stick to it as long as you can, then when you feel like your slipping, drop a line to us. we will help keep your spirits up! then before you know it, you will be losing weight and feeling great!

Having a bad day on a diet and giving up is liking saying "I tripped on a stair, I might as well just throw myself down the rest of them".
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Old 03-03-2008, 06:55 AM   #3
Just Yr Everyday Chick
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Florida
Posts: 10,509

S/C/G: Lost 50 lbs, regained some

Height: 5'3"


Hey! I know what it's like to struggle from time to time. You're not alone in that--lots of 3FC folks go through hard times.

I promised myself if I did one more year here I would move to Europe next year with a different attitude and a new out look.
Could it be that you're unhappy where you are? That sentence made me wonder if maybe you're trying to live in the future too much. Doing so might make a lot of things harder... we can't lose weight in the future, only in the present...

So don't wait any more. Next year--well--who knows what will happen between now and then.

Get started!

"My religion is kindness." --His Holiness the Dalai Lama

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Old 03-03-2008, 07:02 AM   #4
3 + years maintaining
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 12,070

S/C/G: 287/120's

Height: 5 foot nuthin'


Hi Dolly. Good to see you posting again.

One saying I've heard around here many times - "Fake it til you make it." I think it may be appropos for you. Although I really believe longterm weight loss can't occur until you are fully commited and are ready to do the work involved, I do believe there is something, something valuable to that phrase. So although you might not be quite "fully" there, a fake it til you make it attitude just may be a place to BEGIN and then hopefully you will be more commited and determined and enthused as you go along. So yes, DO begin. Get with it! Time's a wastin'. Make the very most of each day. You won't be sorry.

Last edited by rockinrobin; 03-03-2008 at 07:02 AM.
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Old 03-03-2008, 07:07 AM   #5
Made of Starstuff
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: New England
Posts: 8,731


Hey Darlene -

If I had the secret to getting people going & keeping them motivated I'd be a rich, rich woman.

JayEll pointed out the same sentence that stuck with me. On that note, one of the best things I've ever read came to mind: "The time will pass whether you lose weight or not."

So many people struggle with this very thing. Motivation. Determination. Commitment.

So, I'm going to echo those much wiser than I when I ask: What one thing can you do today that will get you closer to your goal?

Drink water? Get in your full servings of fruits & veg? Take a 10 minute walk?

Losing weight is all about today. Never tomorrow, never yesterday. Today is the only thing we have.

You CAN do this.
~Made of star stuff~
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Old 03-03-2008, 07:08 AM   #6
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Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Guatemala
Posts: 55

S/C/G: 209/214/170

Height: 5'7"


Hi Dolly. I understand how you feel and want to share with you all the good energies I can give, this site is great for support, whenever you feel you can't do it and don't know why or need some words from women who've been there, post a line. In the meantime, for me what has worked is focusing on the good things i do instead of my long term goal, and taking it a day a time, sometimes an hour, sometimes a minute at a time.
good luck!!!!

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Old 03-03-2008, 07:28 AM   #7
Former Quitter
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 5,500

S/C/G: 310/310/180

Height: 5'7


Hi Darlene! Its so good to "see" you around here again!

You've been through some rough times with your breakup and working hard. But, it looks like you're ready to put the grieving behind you and get back on-plan. Have you come up with a plan to get you started? Can you committ to packing a gym bag and taking it to work with you? I know that its easier to go straight from work to the gym and not have the temptation of sitting on the couch. Are you having a healthy breakfast and packing a lunch? Do ou have lots of healthy foods in your refrigerator to help keep you on your plan? Planning ahead is one of the best ways of getting back on-plan and staying on-plan. Once you get started and the small victories start coming your way, your confidence will build. So, just get yourself started so you can enjoy those victories!
- Rhonda

"Live the life you've always imagined." Henry David Thoreau

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Old 03-03-2008, 07:33 AM   #8
Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: NY
Posts: 1,853


So much wisdom has already been given!!

The one thing I noticed is your comment about how much you've gained in the past five years -- I worry that, like me, if you don't get started, you will continue to gain. Wouldn't it be nice if in a year when you are ready to move, you are also at or near your goal? What a way to make a clean start!!

I wish you luck, I send you "skinny vibes" and I understand and sympathize with your struggle, been there, done/doing that --

Weight loss is a marathon, not a sprint.
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Old 03-03-2008, 08:18 AM   #9
The Radiant One
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 2,751

S/C/G: 250/142/135

Height: 5'2"


I totally understand. It's hard not to feel that it is so overwhelming that weight loss is an impossible task.
You might just need to focus on the small things for a while. A little success feeds more success. So maybe concentrate on just one thing, like exercise (for example). Make it a point to do a little bit every day. Reward yourself with a gold star or some little acknowledgment. Don't worry about food. Once you start getting into the swing of exercise - then look at some other small change to make.
And come to this board any time of day or night to post successes and struggles - we are all here for support and motivation, and sometimes just a shoulder to cry on.
~ Lori

My blog
What 100 pounds looks like
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Old 03-03-2008, 11:26 AM   #10
Senior Member
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 2,431

S/C/G: 278/see ticker/168

Height: 5'6"


Fake it til you make it... so true! That's how I got where I am with the weight loss. Many times I just don't "feel" like eating healthy or thinking about what I am eating, but I just pretend I am motivated. Eventually, I do feel motivated. But even when it slips, I go back to pretending.

Try doing it for one day, then the next. Just build one good day upon another until you see results, and those results will build the momentum you need to keep going.
Lost 103 pounds, regained 80+, taking it off again.
My Blog:
*Never Give Up!*
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Old 03-03-2008, 12:44 PM   #11
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a basket of yarn
Posts: 246

S/C/G: 148/142/120

Height: 5'NOTHING


Darlene - you sound like me until about a month ago. That's when I finally found out that I had moderate depression. I started an herbal supplement (I didn't want pharmacy meds) and it has made a difference. The tired/lazy/futilistic attitude could be a sign of depression, so you might want to get it checked out. I ignored it because I thought depressed people always cried (which I never did), but someone clued me into the fact that that is only ONE component of it.

Taking short walks and eating fruits and veggies also helps depression. I like the statement "What can I do NOW to help me?" Don't worry about the long-term, just now.
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Old 03-03-2008, 04:16 PM   #12
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Seoul, South Korea
Posts: 740

S/C/G: GW - 145

Height: 5'6"


Thanks...I have some good things going when I take a look at things...... I eat a healthy breakfast, (oatmeal with berries and a little honey) .....pack a good lunch (usually organic black bean soup, triscuits, yogurt and a piece of fruit)....drink 2-3 three bottles of water at work.....

I think it is lack of exercise.....I like the quote "fake it til you make it"...I will try to get some exercise in this week....(walking) and go from there....I would love to get on the plane home this summer and at least be 240....
SW 303/ CW 297/ GW 145
Starting Feb. 20, 2017, Following Keto
10% Goal 270 or 122kgs.

FIRST GOAL: Hoping for 33 pounds (14.9 kgs) gone by June 1, 2017. as of Feb 25 only 27 more to go!
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Old 03-03-2008, 04:44 PM   #13
Senior Member
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Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 2,581

Height: 5'5"


It sounds like you're exactly on the right track, and the advice I wanted to offer is the path that it sounds like you're already committed to taking. I was going to say that instead of trying to fix everything all at once, it's sometimes easier to make small adjustments and build on them. That's exactly what you're doing!

So - just wanted to send you some hugs and wishes for a great adventure in exercising. I know for me, it helps with the blahs, the depression, the stress, etc. I know you'll do it! (And you know - I don't think there's enough respect for people who maintain at an above-optimal weight. If you're roughly the same weight as we you were six months ago, that's an accomplishment too! One that it seems required some effort. Feel good about that, and recognize it for what it is - proof that you have what it takes to control your weight.)
onederland in 2016

Last edited by LaurieDawn; 03-03-2008 at 04:46 PM.
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Old 03-03-2008, 05:05 PM   #14
Beach Bum
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Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Ashburn, Virginia
Posts: 520

Height: 5' 7"


There was an online article today that said exercise is more effective in treating depression than antidepressant medications. I am not suprised by this at all. Exercise makes me feel empowered. There are so many things we have no control over. What I choose to eat and my intentional, consistent exercise, I have complete control over. Empowerment has anti-depressive effects for me!
"Blessed is the person who has earned the love of an old dog." Sidney Jeanne Seward

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Old 03-03-2008, 05:10 PM   #15
Senior Member
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 3,354

S/C/G: 344/279.1/???

Height: 5'6"


Hey Darlene!!!! Welcome back. I hate the struggle of losing weight. I wish there was some magic something or other that could just whisk away all the hard parts of losing weight and leave us with the tools we need to keep the weight off.

When I royally fell off the wagon I struggled and struggled to gain control and finally gave up. I was tired of me self-sabotaging myself each time I tried and decided I was better off not worrying about losing weight. And that's what I did. In November I signed up for a weight loss challenge and managed to lose 12 pounds (I had lost more but gained a couple of the holidays). I lost some of my motivation in the last part of that challenge. I again signed up for the challenge that began Jan. 7. This time I focused more on planning out meals and exercising. I didn't really set a ## to lose or anything and I've done very well. I don't tell myself I can't eat anything. I watch my portions and try to eat healthier while getting in lots of exercise (between 30 minutes to 2 hours a day). I'm sharing all this with you because I have found something that works for me. I have found myself slipping out of control a couple of times so far and as soon as I feel the least little loss of control I start evaluating and looking at my plan and see if I'm working it as best I should. If I am, then it's time to add something else to it but each time I've let something slip—not writing out my exercise plan for the day, not writing out all my meal plans etc. The moment I go back to planning my work and working my plan I've been back in control.

I have faith in you Darlene. You will be able to do this.

Halloween Goal

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