Downward Spiral
 

I have fallen down and I don't even want to climb back up. I let the fast foods creep back in slowly as my life got more busy. Now it's all I eat. I have completely stalled, and have gained back almost 4 pounds.

I KNOW what I am doing wrong. I KNOW I should plan ahead. But I can't get my mind straight. Apathy has overcome my weightloss struggle. I don't want it to be that way...But it is. I don't care what all I shove into my mouth. If it's greasy and tastes good I am there. If it's sweet and rich give me more.

I love the bad foods, and I hate the thought of going back to eating right :(
Grrrrrrr. So yeah. I am trying to make a come back here..But I don't know what to do.

Hi Mary,
I'm so sorry to hear that you're going thru a bad time...but as Dr. Phil says, "How's that workin' for ya?"
As miserable as you sound, I don't think it is...and believe me, I know what you're going thru, because I just went thru it. I had lost 50 lbs, and then turned right back around and gained 6 of it.
You have the answers, you know what to do. Start with baby steps and definitely start planning your meals. Please don't go out and get any more fast food....it's so hurtful to our bodies.
You've lost weight, so you know you can do it. You just have to decide if you want to make the commitment to save your life.
Good luck to you, I wish you the best.
Debbie

My Two Cents
 

Hey Mary,
Hope you're feeling better by the time you read this...
But in case you don't here's a couple of pennies for you...I hope they help.

Penny thought: YOU'VE LOST 42 LBS!!!!!!! Girl, I'd love to be down to your weight! I'd be feeling all good about myself and sexy...and probably like I "deserve" to eat fast food...thing is, if you continue to gain and "don't care about what you put in your mouth" you'll weigh as much as I do. You'll get bigger than you were before. Honey, YOU'VE DONE A LOT OF WORK to get where you are now. Be proud of it, it's hard to undo something you're proud of.

Penny thought: Read what those "fast food products" do to your body. I'm not just talking about excess calories here. But a TV commercial that shows a person smoking covered with the gooey nicotine (that covers a smokers lungs) is highly offensive to the visual senses. What offends your senses? I've recently been reading the awful things that extra sugar does to a person's insides (Dr Oz) because I have a sweet tooth. It kept me away from sugar for a while. Perhaps offending your senses with unhealthy food would help.

Penny thought: Take the OTC Orlistat drug. After a few bouts of uncontrolled diareah, the Pavlovian response is to avoid greasy food of any sort.

Penny thought: Review your goals. Do you really want to lose the weight? Are you truly motivated to do so? Did you feel better at 224? If not, then, what weight do you really want to be? Are you comfortable at your current weight? If not, what are you willing to do to lose? Is it worth it to you to give up fast food products (the hassel of waiting in drive thru's etc) in order to lose weight?

Ok...that's more than my 2 cents. I hope it helps. It's what I'd want someone to say to me, whenever I get to 182...cause I think we're all able to relate to how you feel.

:hug:

Ok, so let's start with baby steps. Often my life & lifestyle require fast food, there are better choices out there. Grilled chicken from Wendy's, chicken Taco from Taco bell, Roast beef from Arby's and subway is always a good choice. I know these are not "ideal" meal choices, but if it must be on the run, it doesn't have to be the really bad stuff.

I am not content at this weight. Yes I feel more confident...But I know I m still fat. 186 is not flattering to my 5'3" frame. I could live with myself much easier at this weight than 224...but not really be happy. And if I keep eating like this, I know all my hard work will just evaporate. I want to look normal. Not skinny. JUST NORMAL.

I just don't understand why I feel this way. Is it laziness? Is it just stress? Whatever it is, I need to find a way to regain my motivation. I know this is a life long commitment...I just can't give up.

Sockmonkey, you have come so far, don't give up on yourself! Does that fast food really taste good to you? Does it make your body feel good and does it make you feel good about yourself?
4 lbs is not so much damage to undo really, you can take care of that in a week or two and be back where you were!
Don't just try to come back here, do come back! Even if you are not eating completely right, keep checking in every day. You will find some inspiration here eventually and your mojo will come back.

:kickbutt: :hug:

You may have to wipe this slate completely clean and "Start Over". Yes, you've lost a great deal of weight! (woot!) And you should never truly forget that, but maybe putting that aside and thinking of this a brand new start will help out. Make those small changes again.

You know what you have to do. You know that you can do it. Now. Do it.

Ok Mary...here's a question...Do you take a coffee break or a lunch break, or even in the evening just take time to put your feet up and rest a bit?

Most of us would say yes.

Instead of looking at your current lull as stress, laziness, or lack of motivation. Why not look at it as a break?
It's not that you've lost your commitment, it's that you need to focus on some other areas of your life for a while. That said, making those more healthy choices (like calling ahead to Subway instead of driving thru McDonalds) might help you feel like you're doing better.
Then, as you get to the "I can't stand being at 186lbs anymore" point, you can pick up and lose some more.
We can't all feel "up" and "motivated" all the time. So, if you want to just breath for a while at 186, that's not a bad thing. The trick is to make those healthier drive thru choices so you don't gain.
You're a smart chick.
You can do this.

Any chance you're just bored with eating well and exercising? It's a long road when you have a lot to lose and I think most people are going to have a point where always trying to do the right thing gets a little old. Then you realize you have to make the right choices forever and it seems a little daunting.

I'd suggest committing to three or four days of eating well and exercising again. I think it would let your head clear a bit to figure out what you're really interested in doing.

Good luck and keep coming back.

I think I am bored with the routine...but how do I make it more interesting?? I work 2 jobs and goto school full time and there isn't alot of time for me to cook nice healthy meals. SIGH.

Mary! Please listen to me! :)

I was exactly where you are now, when the same thing happened to me. Almost right down to the pound. I had gone from 230 to 187..I was proud of myself and feeling better than I had in a long time. Then that same thing crept up on me...and the bad stuff started sneaking it's way back into my life.

I wanted to stop it..but didn't know what to do to change my thinking.

Today, I am 252 pounds...I gained EVERYTHING back, PLUS 22 more. And guess what? I STILL can't get my mind around what to do. All I know is that to me..it seems like I am doing all I can to get to 300...heck, maybe 350!

I am angry at myself, and feel lost, and afraid for my life.

I do NOT want to see you go through this! Please...take care of yourself, and don't let your 4 pounds destroy all that you have accomplished...you are SOOO worth whatever it takes to get yourself back on track. I hope you can learn from my mistakes...and stop this spiral before you've done real damage.

I'm sending you strength, love, and prayers
:hug: :grouphug:
Linda

No big advice from me except that you need to take it one step at a time. IMO, you don't want to be in this funk because you posted here. Now, don't give yourself any options. Cut out the fast food. I know what it is like to be busy. I have two jobs, too. One gives me a paycheck and the other is being a mom to two very active preteens. So, I know it is so much easier to go to a drive thru. But, it isn't too bad to go into a grocery store and buy a salad, or to get a healthy sandwich at Subway.

You can do it! I know you can!

Linda...thank you..Seriously that made me cry. It's nice to know someone knows what I am feeling. I just don't know how to shake the apathy though. I wish you the best of luck!!!

Hey Mary! I've been thinking about you. I went through a mini-version of what you're going through now, but I managed to gain 11 pounds in less than two weeks. Now, I'm re-losing those pounds and it kinda sucks. BUT - I know it can be reversed and that's an important step, too. It's a long journey, with lessons all along the way.

So, my bit of advice is this - Take it ONE day at a time, or even one meal at a time. You don't have to be perfect forever. Your good choices only have to outnumber your bad ones. And at your age, you get to make a few extra bad and/or marginal choices and still lose weight. So, what can you eat today to keep you satisfied and away from the fast food? Sandi's options might just be enough for you for now. With these as the staples, you might lose slowly, still be able to indulge your fast food cravings, and manage your crazy life. Other options are frozen dinners, protein bars, yogurt and other quick meals, making your meals on the weekend for the week ahead, etc. You know there are choices. Do you want it badly enough to figure out what choice works for you in your current life situation?

It's a long holiday weekend! Use the time off from classes to figure out how to make it work, and then go through it day by day. I really want to finish our my journey with you.

Maybe take some cues from Nelie. She has lost an astounding amount of weight. But she has done it in stages, she loses a bunch, then maintains, loses a bunch, then maintains. It sure has worked for her!