My family is oblivious

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  • I started my weight loss journey on September 6th this year. I've changed a lot of things. I drink water all the time. I have a special shelf in the pantry just for my food. I eat different food. When I eat what the family is eating I eat a little portion and a huge salad. I've turned down donuts, desert, seconds. I've pretty much given up the Diet Coke I was constantly drinking. Since Oct. 1st I've been on my treadmill every single day. I'm moving around a lot easier than I was before. I've gone down one size in my jeans. So far I've lost 26 lbs.

    After all the changes what has my family noticed? Today my husband says "You've been on that treadmill a lot lately." Duh! When I turned down the donuts they said "yeah that means more for us."

    Now granted, I didn't announce big plans to lose weight. I started quiet and have kept it quiet. Too many times I've started and failed. I did not need the added pressure of people watching me. I don't have any plans to tell them yet. I wanted to see how long I'd have to go or how much I'd have to lose before they'd notice. I guess it will take more for them to really notice.

    I guess it will take more work for other people to notice too. I've gotten random compliments lately. I wonder if they are really seeing my loss by aren't realizing it. I've gotten compliments on my makeup, my jewelry and my hair. Nothing is really different about any of these things. Maybe it's like when you see a guy after he's shaved his beard/mustache. You know something is different but can't put your finger on it.

    Oh well, I'll just keep working at it. I'm enjoying my results whether anyone notices or not. I know I'm feeling better. I know that I'm going down in size. I know I'm looking better. I really am doing this for ME!
  • I'm with you--I have only told the people that NEED to know what I am doing....otherwise, I keep my mouth shut about it.

    Hang in there--the lightbulb will come on over their heads soon and they will figure it out!
  • I kept my weight loss quiet first from everyone, but after a few months they noticed, the weight loss, the diet change, the exercise... Give it time they will notice.
    cheryl
  • Wow, you've done a phenomenal job in the past few months!! I really commend (and envy) your ability to turn down second helpings, donuts, etc. I live alone and luckily if it's not in my house I don't touch it. On the other hand, if it IS in my house, it's all mine and nobody has to know about it.

    Keep with it. Maybe your DH is noticing you've lost weight too, but has a hard time saying 'wow, you look good'. Furthermore, it took me a good 40 pounds before people started noticing. But when they did, it was a windfall of compliments. I even wrote them all down, actually.
  • Funny story...God bless my boss, he sees me everyday but, is totally oblivious. When I had lost close to 80 lbs...he says one day "Kim you've lost a lot of weight!!" This is the same man that when it was his birthday and we tied balloons to his chair in his office....he sat down and never noticed!!!
  • Wow. Just WoW!!!! You're doing incredible. I recently mentioned this in another thread - Family support is a wonderful, wonderful thing, and I am blessed to have it and I do - up to a point. But I really find this whole lifestyle/healthy eating/exercise to be a totally SOLO act. It's all my doing. I'm the one that's all into it. I do the hard work. No one else can possibly gauge the scope of what I'm really doing.

    As far as them noticing, hang in there. They will. Give it a few more pounds, maybe even 20 or 30. They'll start noticing and marveling. You are doing such a wonderful thing for yourself. I know it's nice to hear outside encourgement and compliments, but people, even family, are like you said - very often oblivious.

    Keep up the amazing work. Those compliments are just around the corner. Soon you will be overwhelmed by all the compliments that will be coming your way. They're fun to recieve, no doubt about it. And I know tons of them are headed your way. Just keep at it. Keep going. You're doing MARVELOUS!!!!
  • This kinda happened to me too. I had lost 50 lbs when all of a sudden people at church started coming to me (like 5 or 6 in the same service) and saying "WOW! You are losing the weight! How did you do it so fast!?" Um...well, I didn't do it "so fast." I had been working on it a long time but they had just noticed. But, I was feeling good about my results long before I got any compliments, so as you have said, it kept me going because I knew what was happening, and I loved what I was feeling and seeing. It just took awhile for people to notice it. That's okay because I'm in this for me and my health. If others are inspired or awed, so be it. But, ultimately, this is for ME! I still say it, 2007 is MY year!! And guess what, here we are getting near the end of 2007, and it has been MY year!

    Keep at it, hun. You will start getting lots of compliments soon - when it dawns on everyone what is different about you.
  • You know the thought - people who see you everyday are the last to notice. That's really true. I think you've done an AMAZING job to be doing it alone. I always say I'm not going to tell anyone, but I always do..lol..

    Go buy a new outfit - one that shows off your success so far - I bet they'll notice then!
  • I also didn't make a big announcement. I think there are a couple of other reasons that people don't say anything. First, they just don't notice. When you're really heavy I don't think people really look at you. Secondly, a lot of people have seen you try to lose weight before and fail so they don't want to make it awkward for you so they just don't say anything. Thirdly, and probably most importantly, people are idiots. My own brother, who I see every weekend, just commented on how I look like I've lost a couple of pounds. Uh, try 80 ya jackass.

    You've done a fantastic job. Others will start to notice and then you can start posting in the "I'm getting irritated by the constant talk about my weight loss" thread.
  • I lost 70 lbs before any of my coworkers said anything and that was only since they had known me. (I had lost weight before I worked with my current coworkers) One thing to remember though it is easier for people who don't see you very often to notice changes in you. Those who see you everday may see gradual changes but may not recognize them as part of a longer change until some time has passed.
  • Quote: Others will start to notice and then you can start posting in the "I'm getting irritated by the constant talk about my weight loss" thread.
    Pretty soon you'll start getting the, "You don't need to lose more" or "you're getting too thin" comments.

    You're doing a fantastic job, Supersub! Keep up the great work!
  • Thanks
    Thanks for all the support everyone.

    I just think it's funny how little my family notices. I can understand if they don't see the pounds coming off a few at a time. I just think it's funny that they didn't notice when I turned down the donuts. I used to grab a few, take them back to bed with me and eat them while reading my book. They didn't notice when I started buying the low cal spray dressing or the 100 calorie packs.

    Maybe my hubby really does notice the changes and is afraid to say anything. He's made comments in the past about my weight that really hurt. Maybe he just doesn't want to make that mistake again.

    Oh and Sheila53- I'll gladly take all the compliments that will be coming my way. I've been due some for about the last 20 years. So I've got some catching up to do!
  • Supersub,

    I have been going through the same thing, only I'm 45 lbs. in! Robin41 hit the nail on the head, and add your idea that hubby probably doesn't want to step on the third rail again.

    I'm looking forward to the compliments when they finally come.
  • What others have said is true! I have lost 35 lbs and not one person I work with or go to church with or socialize with has noticed. I saw a friend that I hadn't seen in 5 months and she was hooting and hollering and asking me if I had been on a make-over show. Told me I looked 10 years younger, my skin was glowing, and on and on.

    I am actually pleased that no one at work has noticed. I'm kinda hoping to keep wearing my baggy work clothes as long as I can through the winter, and then - after spring break, come back to work in a really great outfit that fits - and watch the jaws drop. I can fantasize anyway...
  • We have some people we are going to see next Sunday that haven't seen me since I lost this 26lbs hopefully will be 27 or 28 by then. Will see if they notice. If they don't notice not sure how that will make me feel. I sure don't see any difference.

    I can understand everyone else not noticing they see me all the time, the hubby is great he can't wait to see me get out of the car after my weigh in. He is laughing and smiling before I even get in the door. Think he looks out the window to see my face as I pull into the drive ha ha ha.
    I have lost 34% of the weight I had to lose.