I understand where you guys are coming from, but if I am 100% honest, the first time I stepped into 3FC was into the "Does it Work?" forum to look up Shapely Secrets (did not buy, btw). And at the time, if there was that wonder pill that would make me skinnier without changing my habits and without any oily anal secretions, I would tell you right now, I would have it.

We all go through this. We have a problem, we think up of a way to resolve it, and then we think hey, is there an easier way to do it?

Unfortunately (or fortunately), for weightloss there is not. Either they cut you open and you change your habits, or you change your habits. In either case, I know where they are coming from. When I first got started I wanted that magical exercise that would take away my belly and that cabbage soup that would SUPERBOOST my metabolism.

I thought I had a slow metabolism. I thought my body wanted to be fat. Guess what? I was the one making my body fat. My body doesn`t want to be fat, but I was going through all of this extra effort feeding it junk to keep it fat and getting fatter.

But this took me breaking through the 200 pound barrier to realize. I really didn`t think that it was my actions that were keeping me fat, and I did think that out there was the magical cure.

The closest thing I`ve found to it is chewing coca leaves. No, ìt´s not cocaine. Not even close. I use it when I am hiking above 10,000 feet so that I don`t get altitude sickness. The good thing is that if I chew it, I don´t get hungry. I feed myself for the energy only, but not out of hunger. Plus, you get more energy without getting jittery. AND, it`s the best source for plant calcium in the world. The bad part is that continual use rots your teeth.

In tea form it doesn`t work. Break it down through a chemical process and you get cocaine. So much for my miracle cure. Sigh.

:rofl: Oh that's great. I'm mentally storing some of those for when I'm super svelt!

Muffit..."want-itis"....How true!!

Quite the epidemic we have right now. And it's not just a USA thing - even Casandra from Whales says so.

I might have to try the whopper of a tale trick. The real story isn't much fun any more. :s:

I just re-read this and I realized that what you have said isn't far off from some of the advice I've gotten here.

* Urine - Check. This lady told me to drink my first pee first thing in the morning. Not sure how that helps, but ick.

* Bark and dirt - Check. Supposedly chewing the bark off a tree here will break down the fat.

*Psychic - Check. I was told to go to a curandero, where he was going to rub a guinea pig on me and then open it up to see what was making me fat. I believe that afterwards he would exorcise my fat.

Other great ones (I have a two page list going at home, just in case I ever want to write a book):

Massage the fat. I'm supposed to rub it, some people say with orange peels, and that helps.

Fish oil and fruit diet. I could lose 40 pounds in a month, just like that guy's friend of a friend's cousin twice removed did.

Wrap myself up in bags. I guess I would lose water weight, but it's sooo unsexy.

Another weird amazonian root whose name means penis. I'm supposed to chew it. No thanks.

Instead of cow meat, I should just eat the intestines and the stomach.

Man, I need to look at that list again!