And here we are

Long time since I’ve posted.  One thing leads to another and suddenly, it’s March.  Winter is finally on it’s way out the door.  It’s been really cold the last week but the forecast says it’s going to start warming up.  It’s 30 degrees right now and headed for 50 today.  Going up to 60 tomorrow.

The cruise went well.  At least, as much as could be expected.  It’s not easy to take a crew of nine to New Orleans and spend ten days together.  We had beautiful weather, ate lots of food, drank too much wine and were pretty laid back for a few days.  We rented a little house in New Orleans after the cruise and spent a couple of days in the French Quarter and visiting the bayou.  Donnie was pretty weak after chemo and radiation so I took a scooter that my mom left to me.  He argued about it and then, after we got home, he said he was really glad I took it because he doesn’t think he would have made it without the scooter.  Of course, it really hurt his pride to have to succumb to riding in a power chair but, after two days of trying to walk all around the ship, he gave in and he used it a lot on the rest of the trip.

I promised myself that I would get back on track after we got back and that’s the plan.  I made an appointment with my doctor yesterday because I had labs right before we left on vacation and things are starting to get out of whack.  He wanted to send me to an endocrinologist but I asked him to have faith in me and let me do my thing for three months before we made that move.

I know what’s wrong with me.  Too much junk food.  Too much weight.  No exercise.  Smoking again.  Garbage in, garbage out.  I want to feel better.  I have to stop letting the health problems Donnie, my brother, and my son have keep me down.  I can’t be there for them if I’m a physical wreck.

Oh yeah, my son… Darryl came in from the road shortly before we left for vacation and complained of eye problems.  Wanted me to check his eye because it felt like there was something in it.  I couldn’t see anything and told him he needed to see an eye doctor.  Of course, he didn’t want to because he doesn’t have any insurance.

The next morning, he woke up and couldn’t see out of his right eye.  I rushed him to the eye doctor and they rushed him over to an eye specialist.  He was having an acute glaucoma attack and it was so severe, they didn’t even wait for him to fill out the new patient forms at the specialist’s office.  Took him right back and began treatment.  Gave him meds and two injections right in the eyes.  Ouch!  I couldn’t hardly stand to watch.  Two days later, they did laser surgery on his right eye and he has an appointment to have the left done.  He’s suffered permanent damage to both eyes.  We don’t know how much improvement he’ll have but he can’t see very well at night and isn’t able to drive after dark.  Not good for someone who makes their living driving.

And…the latest update on my brother…his heart doctor finally told him that nothing is working.  He’s being considered for a heart transplant.  His heart is continuing to deteriorate and is now functioning at 15% capacity.  The doctor said it’s a ticking time bomb and he could have a massive coronary just from sitting down.  He’s finally agreed to see a specialist here in Louisville for a second opinion this coming Monday but I can’t help thinking that he’s put himself in a very bad situation by not getting another opinion earlier.  His heart has been continuously deteriorating since he first started having trouble in December and his current doctor has let the situation go on for months now.  Every day is causing more damage.  Maybe the specialist in Louisville will agree but I can’t help thinking his current doctor missed the boat.

Okay, more updating to follow in the next few days but, for now, I’m taking care of myself.  Weighed in at a massive 220 pounds this morning and I have a goal of losing 25 pounds in the next three months.  It starts now.  I’m heading up to the treadmill.  I’ll be keeping track of calories on Sparkpeople and I have a reward for myself after three months of staying on track.

11:30 Update – Finally made my way upstairs to the treadmill.  I didn’t really have a goal in mind, other than to do something.  I felt horrible after just 5 minutes at a sedate 2.5 mph.  So I decided I’d be pushing it to get in 15 minutes.  At 15 minutes, I thought I could make it 20.  As I was working my way to 20, I flirted with the idea of trying to get in 30 minutes and, before I knew it, I was at 24 minutes and knew I could go a little longer.  At 30 minutes, I noticed that I had burned 98 calories (according to the treadmill tracker which is always wrong) so I hung in for another minute and a half to bring it up to a nice round 100 calories.

and that’s how you do it.  Always pushing for a little bit more.