Everything Happens For a Reason

My mom gave me her old digital camera half a year ago but I thought I have no use for it…until today. Well I did take a photo of me when I hit 170 but that was me just snapping pics of myself…pics that will never be viewed by anyone but me.

I was never fond of taking pictures of myself. It’s strange how you look completely different on photo compared to how you see yourself in the mirror. “That camera is busted, I look fat in this pic.” I even tried taking pics of my reflection in the mirror because I thought it might turn out “prettier.”

Today I weighed in at 167.4. I’m losing weight way faster than when I started out. I hope it does continue before TOM arrives. I always gain 2-3 pounds during that time and it’s just really frustrating. Anyway, while weighing in and looking at the mirror, I just realized that maybe it would be better if I start taking pictures of me now to document my weight loss journey. And then I finally realized “oh wow…that camera’s going to be useful after all. I guess things do happen for a reason.”

I got the camera out, snapped a pic of my face and was pleased to see that my face actually has a shape now as opposed to just being round. “I have a chin! Look at that jawline!” Granted, I have two chins but still! It has a shape now! Victory!

And then as I was happily examining the picture, I accidentally pushed the view button and turns out my mom didn’t delete the old pictures stored in there. I found a picture of me and my Dad while visiting Vietnam (it was around Christmas I think) and I was huge! My face looked like a watermelon that grew a face.

So yeah now I’m going to enjoy taking a lot of pictures of myself. When I reach my goal, I want something to remind me of what not to do ever again and at the same time, it’s going to be super sweet comparing the then and now pics. Can’t wait!

***not posting pics here since that’s going to spoil the surprise for when I post in the Goal! forum 😀

Posted by nayshal on September 30th, 2012 under Uncategorized | Comment now »

Breaking 170

If you told the me of one month ago I’ll lose more than 10 pounds in a month, I’d slap you and call you a liar.

This afternoon I weighed in and saw…for the first time in years…the number six behind the number one.

169.8 pounds.

I don’t care if this is still me losing water weight. The important thing is, it’s actually working. I’m seeing results. Oh and about four days ago, I actually lost an inch off my waist and hips. Yay!

Oh I really do wish this whoosh continues. Next week is the dreaded TOM week and that means weight gain. I hope it’s not as nasty as the last one. *crosses fingers*

Posted by nayshal on September 27th, 2012 under Uncategorized | Comment now »

One Month Ago…

I weighed over 180 pounds. I thought the scale was just tripping, after all it had me at 183 one day, 186 the next (it was one of those mechanical scales). The scale can show whatever number it wants but I thought, that doesn’t change the fact that I’m overweight. I’m unhealthy. I’m fat. So on a whim I decided I’m going to go on a diet and try to lose weight. I actually didn’t believe I’d keep at it for more than week but here I am, almost one month after and weighing in at 171 pounds.

It all started when my sister came home from Saigon and I saw how fit she looked. She was significantly more “curvy” when I last saw her six months ago. Turns out she started going to a gym for two to three hours a day and would like continue working out even while she’s on vacation here. I was like “That’s silly. Vacations are for relaxing and eating a lot.” The next day she went and enrolled for ten days at a local gym.

I’ve been told by my parents and other people that I should lose weight but I never really listened. I thought to myself “this is my life, who are they to tell me what I should do?” Little sis never had to tell me “you’re so fat you should go lose weight.” Instead all she had to tell me was “I was losing two pounds a week. You could too.” And that’s when it all started.

My first three days I just tried to eat as little as possible. I didn’t have any idea about RMR, BMR and stuff like that. I had to google it and luckily I stumbled upon 3FC. Learned a lot of things and most importantly, I was re-inspired and re-motivated (at that time I was hungry and ready to give up).

I checked out the Goal! subforum and saw the other members’ progress pics. I cried so hard. I cried because I was happy for them but I also cried because of the sheer pity I felt for myself. I knew I was fat but denied myself of living healthily. And these people were actually heavier than me but they made it! Time to get to work, Nayshal. Time to live and someday you’re going to post your progress pics in there and maybe inspire another fat girl to lose weight.

So I don’t really know my starting weight but I thought 180’s a nice round number to start. So for the first week I lost 4 pounds. Water weight I would guess. The next I lost another 3. TOM week arrived and I actually gained weight. I didn’t know you could gain weight during your period! (my mom never told me) I was really frustrated. I’ve been doing my best to eat healthy stuff, I do 40 minutes on the elliptical everyday but I gained weight? How?! Went to 3FC to vent and that’s where I learned about water retention during TOM. Because of that, I started drinking 3+ liters of water a day.

After that horrible TOM week, I encountered my first mini weight stall. I bought a digital scale so I knew for real the scale wasn’t moving. 174.4 for almost two weeks. You gotta be kidding me. I’ve been working my ass off (literally) and trying so hard not to eat the stuff that I love and all that for nothing? Really?!

That night I faced the mirror and talked to myself.

You can’t quit now. You’ve tried so hard and had been doing well. Don’t quit on me now. This is the very first time in years you’ve actually done something to really improve your life. You’ve worked so hard to come down to 174. For the love of everything that’s holy, don’t eat it all back! You owe me. You weren’t able to do so many things because you physically can’t. You have to turn your life around. It’s going to be an uphill battle but the view from the top will be worth it. Don’t give up! Keep going!

That pep talk worked. 171 pounds and counting. 56 pounds to go. New me for the New Year.

I can do this.

Posted by nayshal on September 26th, 2012 under Uncategorized | Comment now »

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