My Wake-up Call

Everyone has that one defining moment that makes them realize “This is it. I have to do this. NOW.” This is mine.

On March 14th 2011, I had a doctor’s appointment at the lady doctor to start on birth control, since I’m getting married in May, and we believe in waiting until after marriage for sex (hubby to be is a pastor in training!). When she inquired about the length of time I would need the birth control, I told her approximately 3 years until he finishes school and we are settled somewhere permanently. She said 3 years should be enough time to lose the weight if I started soon, and preferably ASAP, as I need to lower my blood pressure to continue on birth control (it was 130/78, but apparently the BC pill has a side effect of raising blood pressure). She also told me that if I got pregnant at my current weight (then – clothed, 304lbs, at home in my undies before food right at 300lbs) the complications that would likely crop up could be fatal to the baby and/or myself.

That was an eye opener for me. I went out to dinner that night with my family and considered it ‘my last splurge’ and then started my diet the next day. Since then I’ve been exercising daily with my Wii (using the Walk It Out) game, counting my calories (I have lowered my intake to 1600-1800/day), and taking Alli with the 2 meals a day that have between 10g and 15g of fat. My breakfast is usually fruit or light yogurt, wheat toast and jam, and skim milk which rarely goes over a couple grams of fat, so I don’t take the Alli.

You cannot get to your destination if you are sitting in park. Every journey starts with a purpose, and a single step. I’ve taken the first few, started my way down the road, and I know I need to stay on track. I’m fully aware that not every day will be a good day, and not every week will show the same loss as other weeks, some might even show a gain. But I am making a promise to myself, to my husband to be, and to my future children, that I WILL NOT GIVE UP. I will fight this fight, for myself, and for them. I deserve to live a long and happy life, and they deserve to have a wife and mom that won’t hold them back.

So here I am. No longer sitting in park. I’m on my way. Starting this wonderful but painful, exciting but frustrating, rewarding but taxing journey of losing almost half of my starting weight. And I will not fail this time.

Failure is not an option.

2 Comments so far

  1. meliz on August 13th, 2011

    This is the exact reason I am starting this journey. I got married a year ago, and when my gynecologist found out I was married the next time I saw her, she gave me the same talk asking if we wanted to have children any time soon, and if we did at my current weight and with my current medical issues, it could lead to some serious complications.
    I want children and I know my husband does too. So, we have started losing weight together (though he loses 3x as fast as I do). I want to be healthy for him and our future family. So I totally relate to your story. 🙂

  2. keccalou on August 29th, 2011

    I have been married for almost ten years and was overweight before I got married I wish I would have gotten the support from my doctor that you have gotten. But after many doctors finally found one that diagnosed me with pcos. Your willpower to go for it is awesome it has took me the length of our marriage and several diet attempts to go for it and get healthy. This is my first comment because this is my first time blogging it is inspiring to her your story.

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