How can this be possible??

Posted by gum232 on February 19th, 2012 |Filed Under ME | 6 Comments

If you have been keeping up with my blog I appreciate you following my progress and for your support and prayers.  Assuming that you are on your own personal journey as well, I am hoping that you are finding success in your efforts.  From experience… persistance and perseverance will prevail! 

This has been the most emotional month for me.  I have been refocused and rededicated to myself for the past year, celebrating my year “anniversary” on Valentine’s Day.  I knew that I needed to learn to love myself.  Don’t think I’ve done to bad if I can say so myself.  It has not been easy yet has gotten more less difficult as time passes.  The way that I eat typically is a natural thing now, good habits have overpowered the not so healthy choices that I had made for decades.  However, we ate out today, which I usually try to avoid, at one of my old favorite places to eat.  They have a simple buffet but have the best fried chicken you’ve ever eaten.  I did it though – I survived without completely hyperventilating and passing out.  It’s amazing how much “self-talk” has helped me through this journey.  I ate a plate of salad (apporximately 8 oz) of fresh veggies with a little boiled egg.  I carried my “supplies bag” and sprinkled some ranch powder on top for flavor.  I then commensed to mutilate 2 pieces of fried chicken breast by removing all the crust and dabbing some of the extra oils out of the meat with the napkins.  NO I did not lick my fingers!  I seasoned it, or dipped it in the carribean citrus spice.  I also had a fruit replacement drink – chocolate – for “dessert”.  I only made one trip to the bar and ate slowly.  I was satisfied. I was successful and felt good after the experience, maybe a little deprived but triumphant overall.

Back to the emotional stuff… the last few weeks have been rather interesting with the realization of the progress that I have made.  I’ve lost over 150 pounds.  I have lost OVER one hundred and fifty pounds!  OMG!!! That is just insane.  It’s quite a feat when you take in the surrounding facts – mainly that I have been overweight for over 30 years of my life to varying degrees and I have done this without surgery.  I am in no way saying that surgery is the “easy” way out, but for me it was not an option – financially or mentally.  I love and enjoy food too much to only be able to eat a small amount.  If I made the not so healthy decision to eat a whole pizza, yes, I’ve done it in the past (more than once), I could make that choice and suffer the consequences.  For me, my doctor, years ago, who tried to persuade me to have surgery, said that their was a 15% success rate after 5 years.  At the time those just were not good enough odds.  Today I’m not sure of the long term success rate of maintaining the weight loss.  I do feel it necessary, and well earned to declare my success through the “hard way” though.  When someone loses a considerable amount of weight society, including myself, would think automatically “which surgery did they have?”  I claim IT!  I stand my ground and say no surgery because I have changed the way I eat and adopted a new healthstyle that is working for me and my body.

I’m at Wal Mart last night in the women’s plus size clothing.  I see all of these clearance signs and then it hits me – and it hits me hard – I don’t need to shop on that side of the store.  It’s quite hard to accept that I can look for smaller clothes.  I know that I’m in size 16s and some 14s but WOW it’s still just hard to believe.  I’m making it!  I’m doing it! So I’m going through the racks at Goodwill today (great place in transition) and as I am scavaging through the racks for the $.99 items I come across some cute things that I don’t put in my buggy to try on because they are too big?!? What? How can this be possible?  I”m not searching for the biggest clothes anymore.  After all of these years, after countless attempts, numerous diets and plans, finally I am able be successful in this process to rid excess poundage? I”m not there yet, but WOW does it feel GREAT to be this close!!!  I am doing it!  I am doing it for me!


6 Comments so far

  1. unskinnygirl on February 19, 2012 9:45 pm

    You have done an amazing thing. I feel accomplished for losing almost fifty pounds. I can’t imagine what it must feel like to lose 150 pounds! That is so awesome. I get what you mean about the surgery. Surgery does not help you figure out,or deal with why your overweight in the first place. There is also no transition into healthy eating habits. I feel if you choose to just follow a healthy eating and exercise plan,you go through all the emotions,and stages of working through the whole process. I have certainly learned a lot about my eating habits through my journey. It’s not easy,but I think it’s importan to deal with all the failures and victories. Good luck with the rest of your journey!

  2. gum232 on February 19, 2012 10:05 pm

    Unskinny girl – you are awesome! 50 pounds is not easy at all to lose. KUDOS! Pat yourself on the back. Don’t forget to reward yourself. You deserve it and your body will appreciate it too. I am so hooked on massages and pampering-no matter what my body looks like in the flesh (not as pretty as I’d like by any means). It’s the least I can do for the body I’ve learned to feed right. Even something as simple as a manicure or a new hair style will make you feel great!

    Keep up with the journey on which you travel and one day you will reach your personal goal. I don’t really know what my “goal” is. I will let my body tell me when we get there!

  3. dagnykight on February 20, 2012 11:38 am

    Heather you know I really love your blog and the honesty with which you write but PLEASE do not add to the misinformation that goes around about weight loss surgery!!! PLEASE!!!!

    First of all, the decision to have weight loss surgery should be between a person and their doctor and based on their own specific circumstances. It should NOT be based on anyone else’s opinion or even anyone else’s experience because no two people’s experiences will be the same. Seems like everybody knows someone who succeeded or someone who failed. Their experience will NOT be your experience.

    I have tried to figure out why some people can have a self-righteous and critical attitude about weight loss surgery. I think it is because they believe the surgery makes the weight loss process “easy” and nearly effortless for the bariatric patient while a non-surgery dieter believes they worked so hard to resist temptation and control their food intake. NOTHING COULD BE FARTHER FROM THE TRUTH.

    Without question, there is NO debate—Weight loss surgery is the absolute most difficult, most drastic way to lose weight and requires the deepest level of long-term commitment. Heather, you said it yourself. You said you did not want to have surgery because you love food too much to eat small portions. Imagine someone willing to make a LIFETIME COMMITMENT to small portions and excluding certain foods because after surgery they would make the person sick. FOR LIFE. Does that sound “easy” to you?

    After surgery, a bariatric patient must learn to adapt to what their modified body will allow them to eat and use that as a tool to develop new habits. It can be one of the toughest struggles anyone could ever go through. The lifetime commitment is what gets people through it and it takes amazing strength.

    The body is incredible and over time the effect of the surgery modification will diminish (within about 8 mos to a year). By that point, the bariatric patient needs to have new lifestyle habits very well established. This is the point when the failure rate may come into play. Many people will gradually eat more food, stretching their stomachs back out, and returning to their old habits. Some people will be able to consume food that made them sick previously. Complications aside, weight loss surgery fails when people fight against it. It would be no different from an emphysema patient starting to smoke again. That 15% number is not accurate. For accurate information, visit the website of the American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery at

    Weight loss surgery is medical treatment for a serious medical condition and no one should deny themselves medical treatment because they fear being judged.

    Heather, you know I congratulate you for what you have accomplished but PLEASE do not make judgmental statements about how other people may choose to address their own weight and medical problems, comparing yourself to what you think is hard or easy for yourself or others.

    If you think not having surgery is something to brag about, you may discourage someone who desperately needs it because of their personal circumstances and medical condition. Really, think about it.

  4. gum232 on February 20, 2012 2:09 pm

    Dagny – you are quite upset with me for telling my opinion yet you are defensively opinionated. I cannot imagine that surgery of any type, yes I’ve had several procedures, is not easy. It’s not an argument of how we lost weight but a support system for those that have lost, are losing or struggle within themselves to maintain.

    I am proud to be losing my excess poundage, that the whole world has seen for decades, through the method I have found which is successful with my body and lifestyle. Fortunately I was able to get a handle on it prior to a bad health scare. As of today – a loss of 155.5 pounds is nothing to be discouraged or displeased about in the slightest. I’m glad that over the last year I have learned to utilize the tools that I’ve actually had all along. It’s not mean to be bragging or boasting that I have accomplished this without surgery, however it could encourage someone that they too can be successful without having to go to that extreme- physically or financially.

    Again, society makes it to where I have to claim my hard earned success to me, myself and I – not to a medical procedure – because of the vast amount of weight I had to shed.

    It’s crazy that it’s come to a battle of how you lose the bulge! You have fought your battle in your way as I fight my battle in my way. My body loves me for it as I’m sure yours does too. Woo hoo … blood pressure, NO MEDS, 110/62.

    Anxious to see what my future holds….

    Can’t wait to see how my first summer goes!!

  5. dagnykight on February 22, 2012 8:54 am

    Heather, making a point of discussing surgical weight loss in your blog is pointless, judgmental, and fails to take into account how everyone is different. Instead of claiming “society” puts value judgments on you, you can simply stop making comparisons of yourself to surgical weight loss methods. You didn’t have surgery, so why even write about it? Every time you do, you look like you are attempting to assert a sense of superiority.

  6. gum232 on February 22, 2012 12:51 pm

    Wow! What a debate!! It’s great!:) Sounds to me, unfortunately, like you are mad at me for losing weight without having had surgery? So perhaps your view is more “judgmental” than mine. I’m not under any circumstance trying to assert a sense of superiority. I deeply apologize for any miscommunication or misunderstanding.

    My success, and my aim, is to let people know that even though they might be overweight, as I was for decades, that THERE ARE OPTIONS. Individually you have to find what works best for you and your body. If it’s medically necessary and that’s the route that must be taken – go for it – under your doctor’s supervision. My doctor LOVES me – having done this without having to have surgery that’s been suggested for years.

    For me – I was able to, and am still working diligently, to lose a considerable amount of weight without medical assistance. My remarks are based on society’s view towards obesity and weight loss – that I must stake claim that I have lost weight without surgery. If someone loses a lot of weight it’s just “assumed” that it was via surgery. You have to admit that. I am just as guilty. When you hear of someone who has lost a lot of weight it’s automatic to “assume” surgery.

    I will gladly proclaim, yet again, that I have done this without having to be put to sleep and alter my internal organs to “force” my body to rid excess poundage and survive the side effects, much less to acquire the funds to be able to pay for surgery.

    It can be done! There are options. YOU CAN LOSE WEIGHT WITHOUT SURGICAL PROCEDURE.

    Reflect on what has and hasn’t worked for you in the past….

    Check out your OPTIONS….

    Make the commitment to improve YOUR healthstyle – for YOU!

    Congratulations to anyone that is on a weightloss journey, no matter how you are losing pounds, hopefully in a healthy manner (not an eating disorder, crazy pills with side effects, etc.). I had pretty much gotten lost in my weight and it had kind of consumed and hid me – from the world and myself.

    I wish to you continued success on the scales but more so in your mind and heart of who you are.

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