The Last 15

One goal at a time

Palisades Adventure July 18, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 10:53 am

Day1-Drove to the Eastern Sierras to the trailhead to set up camp(about 5-6 hour drive). Set up camp and noticed clouds rolling in. Had been watching weather reports and everything pointed to storms for the week. Rained all night.

Day2-Took forever getting packed up because of the rain! Kept having to run to the car then had to let the tents dry before we could pack them. Finally got it all packed but decided to leave the climbing ropes and harnesses since we figured the weather was too bad to attempt any class 4 climbs(a decision we really regretted later on). Me and my exercise buddy’s packs were 40lbs and my dad’s was around 50-60lbs. Used the bathroom one last time before heading out on the trail lol It was cool and cloudy, which was very welcome since the trail has little tree cover in the beginning and its very steep. The trailhead is at 8000′(2438.4m) and goes along a series of ridges following a river of glacial melt which as you get higher becomes a series of turquoise blue lakes. There are 7 big lakes and many smaller glacial lakes dotted around the area. Lots of waterfalls too as well.

My exercise buddy is an exceptional athlete and easily out hiked me and my dad. I started feeling the elevation at 10000′(3048m). 10000′ is always when I start to struggle, even with all the altitude training I do up the mountain, its always my breaking point. We made amazing time though and got to our camp site 5 hours after we started(including breaks) and ended at 11000′(3352.8m). Total hike was 8 miles, 3000ft elevation gain.

The hike in is rough and we set up camp and took a nap. Dinner was vegetarian chicken curry with rice. Turned out really good. All the prepackaged meals I made worked well. So much cheaper than buying those prepackaged meals. And I can’t do most prepackaged meals anyways bc of lactose/gluten intolerance and being a vegetarian.

Day3-Made an attempt of Mt. Gayley(13500′, 4114.8m) and I was really tired from the hike in the day before. I had gotten acclimatized to 11000′ from our camp being at that elevation, but once we got to 12000′(3657.6m) I started really feeling it again. There was TONS of talus(giant fields of rocks and boulders loosely pilled up) and at first it wasn’t bad. I’ve always liked rock hoping, but its very slow going since you have to check the stability of every rock and find the right paths. Also, its exhausted jumping and climbing. We got the the base of the peak but were having trouble finding a way up. The description was to go up a chute and we found one with some trail markers but it was just loose scree(awful nasty pebbles and broken rock). We started heading up and it had already been 3 hours and I finally told my dad, “If we don’t die going up this, then we will die coming. This is unreasonable.” He looked around us and was inclined to agree. Honestly, if one of us had fallen, below was a field of rocks and there were giant rocks slides going on every hour and below the rocks was a giant lake that the huge glacier was melting into that was filled with icebergs. Falling=dying. We heading back down, which was so much more dangerous and scary than getting up. After we got back down to the fields of talus, my thighs started giving way. I had really over done it and my muscles couldn’t support my weight fully from the rock jumping and climbing. I slipped a few times.

The trip really made me realize how much I need to build up muscle. I’ve simply become too skinny and bony and need to get stronger if I want to last and longer and harder trips.

Day4-Rest day. Greatly needed by me and my exercise buddy who had begun to suffer from altitude the night before. She totally lost her appetite and was basically starving. Loss of appetite is expected at high elevations and I lose mine too, but I know what’s causing it and force myself to eat regardless. She mentally wasn’t handling it so well :/ Mentally, she did not have the strength for the kind of trip we were on even if she is one of the most physically capable people I’ve ever met in real life. She stayed in the tent the entire day and I think she was actually afraid from the day before.

Not content to ever sit still, my dad took off exploring the glacier and looking for routes for 8 hours. I went exploring the waterfall in the meadow we were staying in. I haven’t mentioned it, but Sam Mac meadow is truly one of the most beautiful and magical places I’ve ever been. I love it so much and was sad when we had to leave. I took lots of pictures, washed my hair in glacial melt, and ended up finding a trail that turned out to be a short cut for getting to the peaks on the other side of the glacier 😀

I also wrote many notes to my fiance who I of course missed greatly, especially starting on the rest day.

My dad came back in the evening and he had found the correct route up Mt. Gayley, but it turns out we wouldn’t have been able to make it up even if we had found it because it would have required us to go across the glacier(guess it was wayyy to the north) and without proper ice gear we wouldn’t have made it. Even with proper ice gear it might have not been a sure thing either bc the ice was in really bad shape.

Day5-My friend was still not doing well. I brought her breakfast in the tent as she was still very reluctant to leave the tent :/ I had waken up at 5:30 and gotten breakfast, coffee(you better believe we had coffee every morning!) and myself ready for the day since me and my dad wanted to head out early to climb Mt. Winchell. I had told my dad about the short cut trail and we checked it out and to our happy surprise, it took us right where we wanted to go. I guess my dad had forgotten about this trail and had used it before. Last time we went to the Palisades he kept talking about this lake and how it was so close to the meadow etc, but the trail we were on was taking us in the opposite direction and then he decided to cross country it up talus and that’s how my sister was injured and what cut short our trip to the Palisades two years ago. So he was very happy to rediscover this trail.

The trail lead up a waterfall onto a rocky plateau over looking Sam Mac lake(filled with little icebergs from chunks of glacier falling into it). It was very beautiful, and very chilly of course. I was so glad to have brought my dad’s old ice climbing jacket. With my chronic anemia and aversion to cold I needed that ice climbing jacket to get me through!

We took a break for snacks, then the fields of talus begun again. It was soooo slow. Just mind-numbingly  awful to deal with T_T Finally, my dad decided to just jump onto a little glacier and walk up the snow even though we didn’t have gear, bc honestly it couldn’t have been any more dangerous than the stupid talus and sadly it went so much faster.

I fell many, many times in the snow. My dad is obviously a pro and took off, but me…I ended up wet and covered with snow :p

We finally made it to the base on the peak. It was a giant pile of talus and scree. Very dirty rock in awful condition. I wished we had brought the gear, because it was painfully obvious that the trial was NOT class 3 and really was class 4 and maybe some easy borderline class 5 moments of actual climbing.

The climb was extremely exposed and below was a 2000′ drop onto the talus and glacier. We had a rough time following the route, even after reading the guides and studying the pictures. The way it was described turned out to not be how the route went at all. It was not straight up a gully, but crisscrossed a lot. Several times we went across razor thin edges only to find dead ends. At one point I got very scared and was exhausted and started crying. I’m not a cryer or a very emotional person to begin with, but it was honestly a very scary moment. I had just done some real climbing over rocks that was breaking beneath my hands and my dad had climbed onto an overhang and gone behind a corner only to realize that it was the wrong way so we had to go back the terrible way we came. My dad had to yell at me to get it together bc obviously this was not the place to have a meltdown and if there was ever a time I needed to be totally calm and focused it was NOW.

Finally we made it up to the peak and signed our names in the register. My dad is a nerd and signed his ham radio call sign :p I drew a happy face. The peak summit is 13776′(4198.9m) and the highest I’ve been.My new goal is to conquer a 14000′ peak 🙂

We had a snack and savored the view before heading down. It took us 5 hours to get to the summit and the entire trip took 8 hours and 45 min. My legs gave out again and I slipped a few times but didn’t get seriously injured at all. Just bruises and cuts.

Day6-Hiked out. We were all excited to go eat fresh food and made incredible time going down. It only took us 3 hours and 20 min to do the 8 miles hike down. It was very funny because on the way down we ran into many day hikers and this one older European man stopped me and started talking and invited me to go to Spain with him and promised me lots of good food and cheap wine! lol The same man talked to my dad who was behind us, but my dad says he didn’t invite him to go to Spain 😉 haha

Over all this was my most favorite trip I’ve done. I LOVE the Palisades, but me and my dad agree its not worth going so late in the summer. Next time we will bring gear and go when there’s still plenty of ice and snow since its so much faster then trying to scramble across the rocks. Also, rock slides are a serious worry. We saw a bunch of huge ones and saw rocks the size of cars fall off peaks. The rocks hadn’t had to time to settle from the melting glaciers and snow and were too volatile.

I also realized how weak I am. I was completely bruised all over my body from being too bony and not muscular enough. The fronts of my hips were bruised from my pack, the back of my hips were bruised from sleeping(this ones normal when camping/backpacking the rest I’m told are very weird), the sides of my hips were bruised from sleeping, my ribs were bruised from sleeping, and my knees were very bruised from knocking into one another while I slept. My new goal is now that I’m not training for the trip, I’m not going to be doing the crazy amounts of hiking I was doing and instead am going to focus on weight lifting and strength with my exercise buddy training me. I’m still very active normally and do cardio activities like swimming, rollerblading, walking, biking just for fun, but I’m not doing 4 days a week of intense hiking at elevation.

Weight wise, I of course gained water weight from muscle tears and repair. I lost inches though and visibly am slimmer with a few people commenting on it since I got back. I’m still waiting for my weight to go down though.

TMI-Also I started my period after being back and eating enough for a few days. The trip stopped my period, and now its come back with a vengeance! So I’m waiting for that to end as well to see how much weight I lost.

Here is the link to the pics of the trip on fb


Best Week So Far June 14, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 9:10 pm

Like the title says this has been my best week at least within the past 6 months, MAYBE even the past year! My calories have been spot on and I’ve done plenty of exercise. I’m unfortunately sick right now though, so I’m not sure if I’ll hit my 2nd strength routine for the week tomorrow or not :/ But I’ve done 6 hours of intense hiking the past week, 50 min on the bike, and 20 min strength. My net calorie average is 1461 for the week, which should put me between .5-1lb lost. I feel very good about it all and am so happy to have found a system that works.

The weekends are no longer a struggle. F-ing finally! This week I was on my period too which made it extra hard to eat well since I was having these super intense and crazy cravings. I seriously contemplated eating only gf chocolate donuts one day. But I got through it and as soon as it was done I went back to my normal level of having tons of self control and craving healthy things. As I mentioned, I’m sick and it kind of started Thursday on my hike. But I felt fine for the most part, then Friday had a sore throat, but it was very mild at first. Unfortunately throughout the day it got worse and worse. Last night I barely slept, even after taking melatonin bc the pain kept me up. TMI: I even vomited from swallowing so much phlegm(charming, no?). I slept till 11:30, something unheard of for me. Then I was in a daze, tired, blah, coughing, and still had my sore throat. The sore throat is getting better at least, but now I have this dumb cough. I’m so tired and its really hard to think too. I’m hoping I’m better by tomorrow.

The sickness has totally taken away my appetite. I’m simply not hungry and small amount make me feel very full. I did a good deal of walking today while at the beach and am shocked by how little I ate today.

My weight finally came back down to 138.6. I really hope to break that low next week. I want to see 135 so freakin bad. I can’t even remember the last time I was so pumped to see a number. I think it was 150 though bc that was 50lbs lost. I can’t wait to see 135. Maybe next week if I’m REALLY lucky.

Today I wore a midriff baring top and didn’t feel horribly insecure which was nice. I didn’t have too many paranoid thoughts either that people were staring at me in disgust. I felt pretty and thin-ish.

I really did too much today considering that I’m sick and really should have rested. Aside from going to the beach and doing some walking I made my fiance his fancy dinner for the week. Since we only see each other on the weekends I like to make one really big special meal for him during that time to show him how much I love him (that way he has left overs too for the week and doesn’t starve or live off frozen meals). Today I made him baked ziti, fried polenta, bbq tofu steaks topped with caramelized onions, gluten/dairy free ziti for myself(or him throughout the week), roasted broccoli and cauliflower, and a big pot of spicy, hearty potato cabbage soup. Took about 2.5 hours. It all turned out amazing. Especially the sauce for the ziti bakes. I’ve never made caramelized onions before for Mike(since they’re so unhealthy and calorie laden I try and only make them once a year max) and he LOVED them on top of the bbq tofu steaks.

Nothing else is really going on. I’m tired and feel so dull. Meh.


Doing Well June 9, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 10:33 pm

I think I’ve got it figured out. So the food aspect has been really hit or miss and I was trying the low carb, and that was helping, but still having problems on the weekend so did some more tweaking. Now though I’ve found my magic formula! Here it is:

1. Plan plan plan. Always have a food/meal plan

2. Write down everything I eat, not on MFP where you can eat anything as long as its within calories. But somewhere where only the food you’re eating matters. Found forums on 3fc where you write down your meals.

3. Rate hunger cues and satiety levels. Makes me second guess that piece of chocolate I want late at night.

4. Be honest. Really look though my calories for a month and figure it all out and be totally honest while looking at the whole picture. I realized for the past 30 days, I should have only lost .5lb bc my cheat days(all 5 of them) where THAT bad.

5. Eating away from a table spells disaster too. For some reason, if I’m not at a table, I don’t hold myself as accountable. Weird, no?

6. Monitor carbs. Not worrying about them being super low(just isn’t realistic with my special dietary needs and my exercise level) but still keeping them relatively low most of the time. Today since I went on a 3 hour hike I carb loaded for breakfast and was really glad I did so. I performed much better on this hike then the hikes of the previous week.

This is my path to success and how I did great this weekend. If I deviate from this, I have to be honest with myself that I am failing myself. If I deviate from this, its because I am deciding that losing weight is not what I want. I’m not saying that’s bad, but I’m in control of this and its my decision whether or not to stick to my plan and I have been deciding to stick to it the past week.

The scale still isn’t rewarding me for my efforts though :/ TOM started today though so I’m hoping to have a whoosh before my weigh in later this week. While on my hike today I kept thinking how amazing it would be to finally see 135 on the scale. Now that I’m in the 130s I want to get out so I can push the 40s and 50s farther and farther away! Yuck! Worst decades EVER!

My boyfriend is of course on a constant war against my efforts. I don’t talk about them any more to him though. I managed to stop talking about weight loss with him, but he still is always harassing me and accusing me of losing weight. I assured him this weekend that I haven’t lost anything in weeks(sadly that’s true) and that made him happy. My family is starting to bother me too, mainly my obese mother who’s food/weight issues I’ve discussed before on here. She is complaining that people are upset I’m losing weight and that I’m now down to a size 6. The funniest part though is I’m a size 4 haha I think its absurd really, I eat PLENTY of food! I make all my own food, I don’t eat out bc of my food allergies and I can’t afford it. I eat tons of protein, vegetables, berries, nuts, and limited grains. I love the food I eat! Its delicious and good for me. I exercise a lot because I love it and it makes me happy. And yet people freak out and are constantly commenting on my weight in a negative way. Its like, “Hello? I suffered with eating disorders for so long can we just not talk about my weight anymore?!”. End rant.

🙂 Anyways, back to the good things-I feel great. I’m letting the scale do its weird thing and am confident in my efforts. I recalculated some calorie goals for myself. I think since I’m exercising so much now I’m going to up my workout day calories to 1900(if I need it only) and try and keep regular days around 1500. I figure this is a solid plan, has a projected weekly weight loss of .8lbs per week. Very sensible and reasonable. And easy to stick to. I know I won’t always want the entire amount and some non exercise days I might go over, but I think in the end it will even its self out. Like today, even though I hiked for 3 hours, I know I’m not going to hit 1900. I might have a little snack before bed right now, but there’s no way I’m hitting 1900.

I realized today I could live with my body how it is now. But I know I can do better and want a more aesthetically pleasing and better performing body. For my fitness goals, I really do need to drop more lbs since being lighter makes one a faster hiker.

Here’s some pics from the past week.


Slowly moving back down… June 4, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 9:06 am

Well the scale was at 140.0 today. Almost back down to my ultimate low 2 weeks ago of 138.6. That weekend engagement trip and then finals week right after really threw me. At least its not at 148 though like it was as soon as I got back! haha I’m hoping by Friday to be in the 130s for my weigh in.

So yesterday I had a very interesting experience. I tried hiking after a really low carb day and low carb breakfast and I honestly haven’t tried hiking on low carb days, I’ve only been experimenting with low carb for a week now but would eat a bit more carbs on hard cardio days. Well I didn’t yesterday and it was super weird. At first I felt AWFUL, like I could barely move. I felt like I was dying on this easy hike I do all the time. Then a little over half way I started feeling AMAZING. Now I do get endorphins from exercise and they kick in about 20-30min in, but this was way more intense. I was going super fast and was getting close to the end when I realized, “Hey, I don’t want this to end! I want to go harder, farther, longer!” so I jumped onto a side trail up a very steep hill and booked it up that, then nearly ran the rest of the way to the car. So odd! I think its that my body isn’t used to not having carbs for fuel and was instead using ME and my own fat as fuel. Not sure but very interesting to observe and experience.

The only thing that really sucked though was then I was STARVING all day. I mean, I did everything I knew to stave it off. I had tons of fat, fiber, protein, limited my carbs. Ate nuts, olives, and goat cheese for snacks. I have no idea. And I was having cravings too! My first real cravings since going low carb and I think it was my body freaking out from actually burning fat and knowing that carbs are the best easy fuel so therefore making me crave them.

Idk. Its all fascinating. My arms are really sore from my workout Monday night. I made my strength workout more difficult bc it had become too easy. Today its legs+abs and I’ll hop on the stationary bike.

God, I’m still so hungry today. I was also very tired yesterday and I know that didn’t help. I had made myself an epic schedule for each day of the week, but I’ve decided today is a relaxing kind of day(I find exercise relaxing hehe) So I’m going to make myself a big breakfast, do some cleaning, exercise, relax, make lunch, dye my hair, teach tonight. Make dinner. Maybe clean a little more, then bed :p

I got an amazing new dress! Seriously, orange IS my color. I’m obsessed with orange lately! I generally wear a lot of black, but I really want to start wearing more bright colors like orange, yellow, and pink 🙂

Oh so I also had an epiphany this weekend. Its really just not worth it for me to overeat/eat out casually anymore. My food allergies are so bad even the tiniest bit of contamination makes me sick. Also, the carb cravings were so bad Sunday since I had been restricting them! Even a little bit makes me go nuts, like I’m a drug addict! No more! Its simply not worth it anymore. I’m a grown woman and I don’t need carbs or to eat over what my body needs and thrives on. 1400-1800 is PERFECT for me. Unless its a special occasion or I’ve done an incredible amount of exercise, I do not need more than that. I am in control of what I eat. No one is keeping me fat by stuffing cake down my throat, I’m doing that to myself. So yeah, the days of weekend cheats are over. The weeks of not having downward scale movement(and especially the weeks where the scale goes up) are OVER. I’m committed to this and getting these last stupid lbs off.

I FEEL so much better when losing and eating right. I’m choosing feeling good of junk food.


Fat Day/Bad Day May 30, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 2:42 pm

Today is a fat day. Its a day I feel ridiculously huge and like a monster. I feel like I’m 300lbs, I feel like my eating is too “not good enough” and that I need to start worrying about stuff like diabetes and joint pain if I don’t get more strict soon. I think I look pregnant and was staring in the mirror convinced my boobs and stomach look giant. It makes me want to cry.

Sigh. I hate these kind of thoughts. Its very hard to accept them and not act on them. To keep doing what I’m doing and not fall victim to bad habits. I’m staying well within calories, I’m eating better over all, in tough situations I’m making good choices. But a few things I know have set this off:

1. stress from the accursed class that thankfully ended today before I lost it with that incompetent teacher.

2. The water weight gain-I really am a slave to the scale sometimes and its really been messing with my head. I am bloated and can see it.

3. My eating plan not going how I want it because of factors outside my control. I made wonderful meal plans for yesterday and today and both times something has come up to throw them off and even though I really believe I made the most realistic decisions I could at the time and stayed within my calories, I CAN NOT STAND going off plan. It makes me very, very unhappy. Also I can only get guestimations of nutrition of those unplanned eating events and even though I try and guess high, I’m so afraid of being really off and actually being really over and gaining weight.

4. My fiance is stressed

5. I haven’t been able to exercise which is my #1 form of stress relief

I need to trust in my plan and know that the mirror lies, the scale is not the entire truth and does not define my self worth and that its all in my head. Honestly, I might need to take another scale break if this doesn’t let up by next week. I know its bad bc I haven’t been taking pictures(which I normally will do to reassure myself)-bc I feel like the camera is lying when I look at photos of myself and I look pretty or thin 🙁 Yeah, like I said, NOT in the best head space right now. Also, my fiance is the worst photographer ever, he just doesn’t care about taking pictures. I like to have pictures of the places we go and myself at those places to look back on. He thinks this is pointless so makes so effort what-so-ever when taking photos. No thought to light, angle, if you’re even in the photo, warning you when he takes it, if you’re coughing of making a weird face etc. So on the trip I did have him take some photos and they were….bad. I looked hideous and fat in 80% of them. I’m still depressed from it. I feel like maybe when he takes photos, maybe that’s the only time I get the “real” view and that’s what I actually look like and all other photos people take of me or that I take of myself are “fake”. Like, maybe I’m being weak and can’t handle the truth.

If this sounds crazy, well it should bc this is what its like to had ED/BDD thoughts. I’m trying to find a solution for all this. I think keeping to my plan will help and I won’t be eating out this weekend so I won’t have that stress. I’m a little worried about the eating out stress. Anxiety over that hasn’t come up in a long time. Will need to monitor…..but yeah we aren’t this weekend so I’ll know exactly what I’m eating. Also, I’m going to get a food scale and start weighing again. I’m keeping with the low carb bc I like how it makes me feel though. I feel so much more full and my cravings are almost entirely gone. Its hard though bc my fiance thinks I’m making up my food sensitivities/allergies to find excuses to eat less. Which sucks a lot especially bc I’ve done many experiments with myself and he’s seen first hand that I am very gluten/lactose intolerant. He already said I’m not allowed to have anymore food restrictions which really isn’t fair bc its not something I have control over. I just want to feel well. I don’t want to have these intense cravings that drive me insane. I don’t want to constantly feel hungry and never feel sated. I think most people just live with feeling awful all the time and they don’t know anything else so they aren’t entirely aware of it. Like my mother who has IBS and severe bowel issues. She is OBVIOUSLY lactose intolerant, carb sensitive, probably gluten intolerant, can’t process meat, and is caffeine sensitive. And she doesn’t have a gall bladder but still eats fat with abandon. She is miserable and sick and I’ve talked to her about it, the rest of my family has too, doctors have-but she won’t listen to anyone bc she would rather be sick and miserable eating McDonald’s, cookies, and pop than learn to eat any differently. I think I have all her intolerances too, but I head them bc I’ve seen what ignoring it does and I don’t want to deal with all that pain and misery. Sorry, got off topic, but I’m just frustrated and tired. I haven’t been getting enough sleep.

Will post something more positive later. I know this day will get better. I just needed to vent.


Blergh May 29, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 11:24 pm

Well today I was feeling off all day. Its been finals week and I know its not an excuse but my eating was less than stellar :/ Not bad though, just kind of meh. Water weight is coming off, down 6-7lbs Monday. Does anyone else have this issue??? I feel like my body retains water sooo easily and its very frustrating. I haven’t had time to exercise much because of finals stuff and from the engagement excitement. I did go for a hike today though.

Enough being negative, I have some good things too!

1. I finished my final project (all I have is my final exam tomorrow)

2. I aced my teaching demo

3. I have drastically cut back on carbs

4. I am staying within my calorie range!

5. I’m expanding the foods I eat and for the most part am eating less processed foods

6. I burned almost 400 calories hiking today

7. 2/3 of the water weight is gone!

8. I get off early tomorrow so I can rest

9. I’m going out to lunch my bff tomorrow

10. All my students are ready for the recital

11. Me and my sister got matching dresses that we’re going to wear for my brother’s birthday on Sat.

12. I can make tempeh bacon

Lots of good stuff 🙂 I didn’t get home tonight till 10 bc I was at the library and so I ordered gf pizza to pick up since I knew I was too exhausted to make anything. Honestly, I think it was the best decision. I have to wake up early for my final and this way I wasn’t kept up any later prepping food and doing dishes. Also stayed within my calorie parameter of 1600 for hiking days 🙂 I’m very full too even though I had more carbs. I think I might have accidentally greatly over estimated the calories in my tempeh bacon though bc I was REALLY hungry not long after my breakfast and lunch did not keep me filled even though it was the same thing I had yesterday :/ Hmm. Will have to adjust for tomorrow a little, maybe have some avocado with breakfast instead of an extra egg.

Hoping the sodium from the pizza doesn’t bounce me back up, I was still much lower than my normal carbs(113 Net when I was averaging 200 before this experiment!). Tomorrow I’ll get them back down again once everything has gone back to normal :dizzy:


Getting rid of the bloat-Day 1 down! May 28, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 11:50 pm

So this lower carb thing is working really well! Since I’m already gluten free its honestly not that big of a switch. I’m sure it will get harder, but for now at least its working well 🙂 I had 45 net carbs today, getting in the protein is still hard though. I’m having to supplement with protein powder. So for breakfast today I had this really gross smoothie(blech won’t be using that mix again!) and also some celery stalks with peanut butter and vegan cream cheese. It kept me full most of the day and I didn’t even need lunch. I had some raw almonds for a snack later and that kept me good till 8pm. Then I had 3 eggs cooked in kerrygold butter(butter doesn’t bother my lactose intolerance as much for some reason) , some goat cheese, kalamata olives, and a delicious quick japanese inspired broccoli slaw. I’m VERY full but will have two small squares of dark chocolate and protein hot chocolate drink concoction(edit:ugh was so full and couldn’t finish it, now I feel nauseous) and I’ll still be around 1400!!!! Amazing!

I’ve been suspecting for a while now that I’m carb sensitive and this is really proving it. I love doing little experiments hehe I’ve been so successful with gluten free and (almost) dairy free and clearing up most of my stomach issues, but still I’ve always been so hungry and had insane cravings. I’m really hoping this will fix it. Only time will tell :dizzy:

I went to the store today and stocked up on supplies. Got peas, butternut squash, eggs, tons of berries, high protein tofu, tempeh, chevre, avocados, apples and bananas(for my sister), arugula, olives, stevia, sweet peppers, eggplant garlic sauce, broccolini, and a gluten free pizza 😮 for when I’m lazy lol I’m getting excited about planning and creating new meals 🙂 Just now I prepped tempeh bacon! I’m actually a little ashamed I haven’t made it before. I thought it would be difficult, but so far seems easy. For breaky tomorrow I’m going to have bacon and eggs 😀

Know I still need to post engagement weekend pics, will probably get around to it this weekend 😉


Preset Calories Plan

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 10:11 am

FINALLY figured out how to get past phase 5 of my nutrition challenge. I’m going to write out my own calories plan here to follow!

Hike Days: 1800 max

Lift Days: 1600 max

Swim Days: 1800 max

Long hike days: within reason 😉

Saturday: 2100


Woah! May 27, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 11:12 pm

Well had a VERY exciting weekend. My boyfriend took me for a romantic getaway up the coast and proposed! Very happy and very exciting. I’ll be doing a big picture post and give more details in the coming days.

My eating was crap for 3 days though. I mean, like holiday style bad. I just weighed myself and am up 10 LBS!!!!! ahhhhhhh!!!!! I know its not real fat gain. Simply water and *TMI ALERT* I haven’t been regular. So yeah stomach issues, sodium, and did a lot of exercise. I looked over my calories and for the week they averaged out to maintenance so I know its not possible that I gained any actual fat. At MOST maybe .5lb to 1lb. But even then I’m skeptical. Also probably accidentally consumed some gluten(its so hard when I’m away and eating out at new restaurants) and even a tiny bit will mess with my tummy and cause severe water retention. So yeah, I know it will all be gone plus some in a week or two. Still, it sucks to see :/ To get it off faster I’m going to be lowish carb and lower calories then normal. Its finals for my May term class the next few days so don’t have my usual exercise time, but hopefully cutting calories down to 1400 for a few days and cutting carbs will get the water off.

Three days of this should work, I might need more but I’ll see how my weight is Friday and decide then if I should continue with the lower carbs and calories then.


Another Day May 22, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — dottington @ 10:39 pm

Ate awful yesterday but was down 1lb today. Huh. I really don’t understand my body lately! I hate not knowing what’s going on though. I do have a theory, I noticed I’ve been naturally lowering my carbs more and I think that must have something to do with it. I did a little carb experiment today and ate way more carbs then normal and the scale was up 6lbs this evening! And I mean, I didn’t even do that much higher! Going to be sticking with upping my protein and keeping my fats high since that seems to be what my body likes most. My bf is totally against it though. He is not very supportive of my efforts, thinks I need to stop losing, ect. Its extremely frustrating, but also motivating in a strange way. I try and not talk to him about it, but fitness is a big part of my life and I’m fascinated by nutrition and how the human body works. Le sigh.

This weekend we’re going away and I’m very excited. Aside from him being less then thrilled with my continued weight loss efforts, he still is a wonderful man and I love him dearly. We do share a lot in common and have the same values and dreams 🙂

I understand his concern. My history with eating disorders worries him because he loves me and doesn’t want me to suffer. Speaking of…my body dismorphia is making a come back big time. I try and remind myself that it isn’t real what I see in the mirror. That its my mind distorting my body and tell myself to stay calm. Its still hard though to look in a mirror and see this awful, gross, distorted version of yourself 🙁 I know its the stress from my summer class and I’m really hoping for it to abate after next week.

I’ve been losing some inches which makes me happy 🙂 I will be so glad to finally be at goal and not have to always be scrambling for clothes that fit!

For our trip we’ll be doing a lot of driving and I planned some healthy road trip snacks. We will eat out a few times though and I’ve already looked ahead at some menus to make good choices. Also we’ll be hiking so at least I’ll still be getting my exercise 🙂

Including a current photo here. My bf picked out this bikini for me and its itty bitty. This is from last week at the beach. I was a bit insecure wearing it at first because I thought people might be staring at my jiggly tummy and legs, but I got over it 😉

Well I need to drink my tea, take a bath, do some beauty treatments(gotta be all ready for the romantic weekend ;)) and go to bed. Night.


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