Is the pause button on?

So, Saturday’s are my weigh in days, and boy did I NOT want to weigh in this morning. I guess the good news is I didn’t gain anything. But, I sure didn’t lose anything either. I can’t even begin to describe to you the busy week i’ve had. Ok, i’ll describe it. Ha.. So, on July 4th around 3am our toilets decided to overflow. All over the bedroom! Of course we had carpet and that was officially ruined. The carpet stayed for another couple of nights which turned into the most stinky, old, mildewy, bitter smell. I figured when the smell took over the entire house and was making me feel ill I had to put my foot down. At this point I think it was safe to say the carpet was on a downward spiral and not turning back. Kind of like my old teenage dreams. 😉 So, just like my dreams, it had to be replaced! By something much more awesome of course. Only problem is, we still haven’t bought the new flooring yet, so we are currently dealing with cold concrete. Funny thing is, because our carpet was ruined, I insisted we paint the bedroom since we had to take all of the furniture out. It needed paint so bad. Three years have gone by in our house and the bedroom still had the same white walls and shadows of 70’s wallpapaer left from the previous owners. So needing to paint the bedroom and replace the floors kind of turned into other household projects. Like, painting four other areas of the house plus our front door…. And our out of town family will be here in less than 24 hours. And guess what? Our bedroom still needs flooring and paint…. The plan is to get the paint done today before the family gets here, and the hubby and his dad will do the floors this week. Also, don’t forget we have three kids, four dogs, work, and school. So, I think you can see why our week has been so incredibly busy.

Even though it has been a crazy few days, that still doesn’t excuse my poor eating habits. Under stress I induldge more, so i’m honestly shocked I didn’t gain about 5 lbs! I’m getting so frustrated with myself lately, and my lack of motivation. I feel I can stay motivated until about the end of the day, and then the snacking demons take over. Why, oh, why do we feel so overwhelmed by life that we turn to things so temporary and unfufilling? Whether it be food, cigarrettes, alcohol, drugs, or whatever the poison may be. It only satisfies us for a brief moment! What is so exciting about that moment? It is very much like an adrenaline rush of some sort. Hey, i’m so angry/sad/happy/anxious right now so let me sabotage my body! What a wonderful idea! This doesn’t make since people! And by people I mean me. This. is. nuts.

But, guess what? It’s a new day. Yes, we have the power to keep beating ourselves in the head with a hammer, or simply putting the hammer down and saying to ourselves, “Ouch! I don’t like the way that makes me feel anymore. So I will put the hammer down.” You know what? I’m sick of leaving “bruises” on my body by shoveling in useless calories. And I will hold myself more accountable. I plan on signing in each night and putting it all out there on the internet what I ate. I don’t care if I did good or bad, it’s going on my blog. On that note, I have a lot of last minute things to do before my in laws arrive, so I will check back in tonight.

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