Dr. Phill book

IDGRL2005 · 10-23-2005, 09:58 PM

Hi all!

Just started reading the Dr. Phill book and was wondering if anyone else is either reading this or planning on doing so soon. I saw some posts below about people thinking about starting a discussion group, so let me know if you're still interested!

Thanks and have a good day

AnnieFannie · 10-23-2005, 11:23 PM

Hi. I've actually read Dr Phil's book and am currently rereading it. Not sure if they are still going to continue the discussion of it or not.

miss_elisha · 10-24-2005, 03:21 PM

Hi!

I tried to start up a new discussion group a few weeks ago, but there was not much interest.

I, however, am currently re-reading the book (yet again!), and am still interested in a discussion, if anyone else is.

~Elisha

crd43123 · 10-24-2005, 04:56 PM

Hello... I just started the book. And I would be interested in a discussion group.

MrsJim · 10-24-2005, 05:03 PM

Hey you guys -

Check the Dr Phil Book Discussion sticky on the top of this subforum - I've hyperlinked most of the original discussion threads to make it easier to access them. LOTS of good info there

AnnieFannie · 10-24-2005, 05:30 PM

miss_elisha: I know how you feel. I am rereading it again. Thinking it might help me if I refresh myself again. Try to realize why I keep sabotaging myself by not exercising. If you want to start up a discussion again, I'm game for it. Just let me know.

IDGRL2005 · 10-25-2005, 04:54 PM

Hey ladies!
Sounds like a few of us are interested in a discussion group. Shall we start with chapter one today/tomorrow??? Let me know if that works for you guys! I'm excited to go through this book with people and discuss it...I think it will sink in much better that way.

AnnieFannie · 10-25-2005, 05:13 PM

I'm game for starting the discussion later in the week. Tomorrow or Thursday would be good. Just got to tell me which section(pages) we are going to start with so I can make sure I have that read.

Miss_Elisha: I noticed you tried to get the discussion going but seemed to fizzle out. But hey I'm ready to discuss it. Just getting caught up on rereading it yet again.

Keep me posted on when were going to start.

Frosty · 10-25-2005, 05:23 PM

Your timing is perfect. I bought the book but never read it, soooo I think the timing is finally right for me. I will read section 1 and look forward to our discussion about it.

IDGRL2005 · 10-26-2005, 06:39 PM

Hey ladies!
I just figured I would start off our discussion with the things that really stood out to me from the book. I've been underlining as I go and I am struck by different thoughts, so I'll just go through each of those points. Can't wait to hear your guys' thoughts and what gave you "aha!" moments!

"Willpower is an outright myth, and your willingness to be deluded by this myth has sabatoged your weight-control efforts for far too long. Willpower is unreliable emotional fuel that drives you when you are excited, motivated, or energized."
This was so comforting for me to hear...I thought I was just a "weaker" person than all those who had found success with weight loss. I blamed my inability to stick to a diet for more than a few days on lack of willpower and thought since I lacked that willpower, I would never lose weight.

"If you can recognize that it's not just the specific weight you want to attain, but also the feelings that you associate with it, then your goal expands from the weight to the connected emotions. If you can come to relize that what you really want is to feel bettera bout yourself, then your goal also becomes the feeling."
I was so focused on my goal weight, 125 pounds, that that was all I cared about reaching. Now, I realize that what I want even more is to end my out of control/binge eating. I want to feel like I have control over that area of my life...I want to end obsessive food/diet/weight thoughts and start enjoying all that life has to offer...apart from food.

"Having specific, carefully mapped out, vividly envisioned goals is an absolute requirement for success. Without such goals, you will fail."
I have my goals on my calendar now...I am shooting for just a pound a week. I don't want to aim for more, dissapoint myself, and give up like so many times before. I'll have my "official" weigh in on Tuesday.

"Get rid of self-defeating thought patterns, believe that you will succeed, and you will have mastered the first key necessary to overcome your struggles with your weight."
"You start a weight loss or exercise program to change your shape, but your efforts bite the dust again and again, because you tell yourelf that you are a hopeless case who will never succeed. Your personal truth is that of a failure- and honestly, why shouldn't it be?"
I guess even though I have tried diets time and time again, I never succeeded because I never actually thought I could. I have always assumed I am just food addict, and that nothing would ever work for me....no wonder why I failed! The last couple of days, since I've read this, I've been trying to listen to those negative messages and reverse them....It's working.

"What you believe about yourself, what you treat as your own reality, is dramatically important because it guides and directs your weight management efforts."
I am telling myself "You are beautiful! You have a beautiful body, and you are going to make it even hotter by taking care of it, eating right and in moderation, doing cardio, and lifting weights."

Our inner thoughts, beliefs, self-perceptions, and emotions can give us a lift for a positive outcome, or hold us back in complete inertia. You may be telling yourself that you will never lose wight, or that it is too hard, or that you hve no self-control. If you accept these thoughts as your personal truth, you will only sabotage your efforts to manage your weight."

Aha! So that is why I sabatoge myself...I think I have had ALL of these thoughts running through my head for a long time now.

"For every thought you have, a physiological event occurs in unison with that thought." If you say you don't like exericse....your body will become depressed and lose energy.
Just telling myself I love exercise and reminding myself how good/powerful I feel after has really motivated me to workout.

Those are some of the main things I got out of the first section...there was a lot more, but this is really long as it is!

miss_elisha · 10-27-2005, 09:53 AM

Great idea! I did the same thing, only instead of underlining in my book (I'm a little neurotic about my books), I type them on my computer, print them out, and paste them on the wall. Or at least I would if my printer was working at the moment.

When I have access to the quotes I have marked, I'll come back and add them, but for now I'll just add my comments to the quotes you picked.

"Willpower is an outright myth, and your willingness to be deluded by this myth has sabatoged your weight-control efforts for far too long. Willpower is unreliable emotional fuel that drives you when you are excited, motivated, or energized."
I read a post here at 3FC similar to this that has helped me. It went something like this: "Forget about motivation. You don't do it because you'd rather eat right and exercise than do anything else; you do it because you have to. It's like brushing your teeth or paying the rent. No motivation or willpower required. It's just something you have to do, like it or not."
I've always thought of myself as weak too, and I just have to keep telling myself that I'm not weak, and that I can do whatever I set my mind to. Period.

"If you can recognize that it's not just the specific weight you want to attain, but also the feelings that you associate with it, then your goal expands from the weight to the connected emotions. If you can come to relize that what you really want is to feel bettera bout yourself, then your goal also becomes the feeling."
I don't even know my goal weight (since I've never been comfortable with my weight, I'm not sure what it would take), so it changes around a lot, anywhere from 150-175. I just want to be comfortable with my body and I want it to be strong and healthy--that is why I exercise. I diet to help shed the pounds, to get and stay healthy, for myself and for my future children, but even more so I think it's because I want to be free of my food obsession. Food does not control me. It's just food, and I have to remind myself of that constantly.

"Having specific, carefully mapped out, vividly envisioned goals is an absolute requirement for success. Without such goals, you will fail."
Again, not sure about my goals exactly, but I do think I'm being fairly realistic about them. Most of the time I say 165-170, and I honestly think I will be comfortable there. I'm a large person, and I know I will never wear a size 2 or weigh 125 pounds, and I'm ok with that. As for a timeline, I want to be at goal by my 26th birthday on May 29th, and that's perfectly doable. I've also set little mini-goals along the way to keep me motivated and on track.

"Get rid of self-defeating thought patterns, believe that you will succeed, and you will have mastered the first key necessary to overcome your struggles with your weight."
This one is hard. I do good for a few days, then I slip up, then a little more, and finally I'm back at square one and starting over. That's why I keep reading the book over and over. I do think I'm getting better at it though, better at catching those negative thoughts and intercepting them.

"You start a weight loss or exercise program to change your shape, but your efforts bite the dust again and again, because you tell yourelf that you are a hopeless case who will never succeed. Your personal truth is that of a failure- and honestly, why shouldn't it be?"
He's right. I believe in the "mind over matter" theory in most situations in life, so I don't know why I didn't bother to apply it to weight loss. If you think you will fail, so you shall. But at this point I'm telling myself that I succeeded in losing weight once, and I can do it again. And that IS the truth.

"What you believe about yourself, what you treat as your own reality, is dramatically important because it guides and directs your weight management efforts."
I have another quote I got somewhere here at 3FC that I tell myself over and over: "I am beautiful. I am strong and I am worthy and I am going to lose this weight."

"Our inner thoughts, beliefs, self-perceptions, and emotions can give us a lift for a positive outcome, or hold us back in complete inertia. You may be telling yourself that you will never lose wight, or that it is too hard, or that you hve no self-control. If you accept these thoughts as your personal truth, you will only sabotage your efforts to manage your weight."
I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...

"For every thought you have, a physiological event occurs in unison with that thought." If you say you don't like exericse....your body will become depressed and lose energy."
He's absolutely right about this one, too. So I keep telling myself that I love exercise and I'm full of energy. And it really does help me keep going.

petra65 · 10-31-2005, 07:07 AM

Hey guys. I just bought this book and started reading it too. I've read a ton of diet books. I read diet books like other people read novels and so far he hasn't really said anything that has knocked me over. (but then again, I'm a mental health professional) I do like his direct approach and the fact that he has little worksheets in the book for you to do. If something really strikes me I'll add it if you don't mind.

IDGRL2005 · 10-31-2005, 03:51 PM

Miss Elisha- sounds like you took a lot from the first section as well! I loved what you said about "it's just food." Sometimes I think it has this magic power over me, but it really shouldn't and it really won't anymore! We can do this. I just had to share that since reading this book and only working on changing my mindset, I have lost 5 pounds (I have NEVER lost 5 pounds before...I always quit after 2ish) and not had a binge. If after only one "weight loss key" I'm feeling like I am starting to "get it" then I can't wait to continue through the other 6!!! I'm reading the second key right now, and figure I'll post on Wednesday with what I got out of it. For everyone else reading this, please share any insights you had or things that just struck you. Have a good day!

petra65 · 11-01-2005, 11:50 AM

I've gotten a little further into the book and I have to say I'm more impressed than I thought I would be. I'm into the first key. His approach is basic cognitive-behavioral therapy but it is written so most people can understand and relate to it. I especially liked the questionnaire on how ready are you for change. I think a lot of people start this journey only partially committed to it and that is a set-up for failure before they get out of the starting gate. I also liked the idea that he has you think about your weight locus of control. I'm an internalizer but he points out that even that can have it's downsides (taking responsibility for things we can't control, and not asking for help when we should) which perhaps we all forget sometimes.

petra65 · 11-03-2005, 07:46 AM

Hey! What happened to everyone. I just finished reading the second key-Healing Feelings. I have to give Dr. Phil some real credit for tackling some difficult topics in this chapter. This is the only weight loss book I have read where the author actually has the courage to talk about the fact that some women (and probably many women) with long term weight issues were victims of sexual abuse in childhood and use their weight as a way to avoid intimacy in adulthood. In my opinion, he deserves a standing ovation for actually talking about this often taboo topic. However, most women can't deal with this on their own and actually need to seek professional help. I also like his MER concept. I know I have used this concept in my own life but I hadn't put it into those kinds of words.

What are the rest of you thinking as you read this?