1. I want to stop making that little "ooph" sound when I get in the car.
2. I don't want my saddlebags to creep under the arm rest at the theater.
3. I want to shop at the normal clothes store again (no more polyester tents!)
4. I want to wear shorts in public.
5. I never want my husband to say (again) that my new, cool pants look like something the "Golden Girls" would wear.
6. I want family photographers to once again feel comfortable taking my snapshot (without threats, cussing, or violence from me).
7. I want my picture to be removed from the illustrated dictionary for the word "cankle"
8. I want to have less chins than the Chinese phone book.
9. Oh, and for my health.