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Advice and Perceptions

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Old 08-28-2013, 01:38 PM   #1
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Default Advice and Perceptions

I wrote about this today but wanted to share with everyone here since we are all doing WW. A lot of you don't go to the meetings so you miss the topics. This week the topic was "what advice would you give someone new?" I thought it was awesome. Anyhow - here's my story...

I contemplated not going to Weight Watchers yesterday.I knew I’d weigh heavy from the weekend. I knew it’d disappoint me. I knew I’d be upset. And I did. And I was. I sat down next to my dad totally bummed and mad myself.

“All that hard work down the drain because you can’t keep your sh*t together on the weekend.” “So stupid.” “To he|| with your goal – you’ll never see onderland at this point.” “The same effing pounds over and over and over again.” It all ran through my head.

The topic this week was what advice would you give someone brand new to Weight Watchers, just starting out?

We all wrote down our answers on a little piece of paper, folded it up and put it in a basket. Everyone redrew a piece of paper and anonymously read it aloud.

Someone started to read mine and she choked up. She got emotional. She had to stop reading and compose herself. I realized that there were a few other people that were getting emotional. The leader made a comment about the advice being “powerful.” The woman quietly whispered, “I needed that.”

I keep replaying this in my head over and over again.

My advice? “If I could do anything, I’d hug my 325lb self and tell her I’m sorry and I love her. Forgive yourself. Your journey won’t be black and white. Find your grey.”

This morning I woke up, still thinking about this. I went for my run and I still couldn’t shake it. As I was running it hit me – I was being a hypocrite. The truth is – I needed that, too.

So, I had this conversation in my head:

Did you have a good weekend? Yes
Did you really do that bad? No.
Is this mostly water weight? Yes.
Is some of it because you’ve started running and you know this happens the first two weeks you run? Yes
Did you gain 125lbs or 1.6? 1.6
Is the world really ending? no
Does the scale define you? no
MOVE ON, DANIELLE. LET IT GO. Forgive yourself. These things will happen. Your world has not ended. Got it? yes



I'd love this thread to take off and think it could be really valuable. I certainly took away a lot from last night's meeting. Soooo.....

What advice would you give someone that is JUST starting?
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Old 08-28-2013, 01:49 PM   #2
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Excellent advice !
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Old 08-28-2013, 04:52 PM   #3
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Great idea for a thread!

- Weight loss is a precursor to maintenance, and maintenance is lifelong. Therefore, losing weight is a great time to pick-up the skills for maintenance.

- Because weight loss is followed by maintenance and maintenance is for life, lifelong lifestyle changes vs. temporary solutions are key.

- The weight got put on over time, and will take time to take off.

- All progress is worth celebrating! every single pound is worthwhile.

- You don't have to do it alone. If you're on 3fc, we are here for you and ready to offer support and a shoulder or high five! If they are starting at it alone, find support. Support makes weight loss, like life, so much easier and more enjoyable/meaningful.

- There will be easy times, hard times, confusing times, thought-provoking times, amazing times, elation, disappointment, and more. This is all worthwhile, they can get through it, and there is so much to discover through weight loss beyond finding one's collarbones.

- That anyone can do it. Absolutely. I say this with complete faith.

- Perfection is not expected, and not necessary. Falling off the band-wagon happens. It's possible to get back on. And if we fall off, it's important to know how to get back on.

- You were beautiful before, during, and after this process. You deserve your love and compassion as much as anyone else does.

- Weight loss is a process that can be individual to each person. What works for one person may not work for the next, and certainly doesn't have to work for the next. There are a myriad of approaches. Do what works for you. Employ the approach that seems more suitable to you and employ it at a pace that feels most productive for you. You have a lifetime to learn and hone your skills; it doesn't have to come all at once (in fact, it won't).

- Take it one day at a time. Trying to think of the ultimate goal (and how amazing that will feel compared to how crummy the present may feel) is usually unproductive and depressing. One day at a time, one choice at a time, and sooner than later you will see progress!

- Losing weight can be hard. In fact, it might seem so surreal as to be impossible. But it's not impossible. You CAN do it. Equip yourself with knowledge, support, and commitment to your goal and eventually YOU will be the success story others gaze at in wonderment as they find themselves in your starting shoes wondering if it's possible for them to do what you did. It's very common to feel this way when starting out, but success is as much within your reach as it is within everyone else's who's met their goal.

- Got a lot of weight to lose? It might take a year or more. And yes, that can feel like a really long time (which doesn't have to, but can, feel overwhelming and depressing). However, the truth is that this time will pass anyway, and when it does, you can find yourself 20, 30, 50 + pounds lighter (and even if not yet at goal, certainly already enjoying the satisfaction and perks of success!) or in the same place you were before, lamenting about the impossibility of losing weight. Realizing you have a lot of weight to lose can be difficult, but it's still worth doing. You're worth the life you want to live in the body you desire.

- Small changes lead to grand results.

- The scale gives you a very narrow picture of what's going on. It can't measure your health, it can't measure your health improvements, and it can't measure your effort or your worth. It's not always accurate either (because of factors like hormonal changes, sodium intake, water retention, and the myriad of processes that take place within our bodies). Thus, it's best used as a guide, a tool used at your discretion, rather than an oracle and dictator of your success and worth.
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Last edited by belovedspirit : 08-28-2013 at 05:04 PM.
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Old 09-08-2013, 06:59 PM   #4
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Sometimes you don't feel it. You feel the same size. You feel the same weight, especially if it's a long journey. Believe the scale, because sometimes it's right even though you feel no different.

I finally felt it this weekend. I'm still wearing the same clothes. But I finally felt less than ~315 lbs. And it feels amazing.
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Old 09-09-2013, 11:15 AM   #5
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We did something similar in my meeting a couple weeks ago and it was amazing how many people had the "This is exactly what I needed to hear" moment with the one that they picked out.

My advice that I wrote at the time was "Don't give up. You're going to struggle and you're going to want to quit and you're going to be disappointed in yourself and disappointed in the program. Just keep going!!!"

I have been struggling bad since Christmas time. Consistently gaining weight basically and am now back in the 190s. I indulged a bit at Christmas and it just kept snowballing from there. Even when I would have a good week, my body wasn't responding and I am frustrated beyond words. However, I know that I have to keep going. Eventually my body will catch up to my actions and eventually the scale will start to move in the right direction again. If I just gave up and continued down the pity path, I would be right back up to my 250 pounds.

I definitely don't enjoy that I put on weight and am not in the 170s anymore. However, I made it there once. I CAN DO IT AGAIN! I just have to believe that I can and keep working at it.
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Old 09-09-2013, 02:02 PM   #6
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Old 09-10-2013, 11:03 PM   #7
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Although I am a WW life timer, 2 years, this month maintaining, haven't missed a weigh in good or bad in 2 years, I don't post over here often, My bad.

Anyway, sometimes, I do find that, when I'm struggling, someone will say something at a meeting, and I have that like, thumps myself on forehead, why didn't I think of that moment!

Duh!

Something I have noticed with WW and dropping in here to lurk, is what WW is doing in different parts of the U.S. is not always what our area is focusing on.

Last week my leader asked me if I would be willing to speak to the group, of course I said yes. My self and another long term maintainer were given a heads up by our leader, about the material, and it went very well.

Anyway, over the last few years, I've come to realize, it is a life long journey. We don't have to do it perfect every day, but if we persist, and keep on keeping on, it does work.
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Old 09-11-2013, 09:11 AM   #8
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I haven't missed a meeting since I started in Jan of 2012- until today.

On my scale it looks like I might be just past 2 lbs over my Goal weight. I weighed in within range last week- the monthly wi- and I guess I should know but- if I'd gone and been over, would I have had to pay to attend the meeting, even though I already had my required monthly?

That's what kept me home today, resolved to be there next week and under goal.

Good advice here...I know that I need the meetings and always hear some piece of advice or get a hint that really helps. I hate missing but I can't afford to pay today...

Danielle, this helps me today:
Quote:
Did you gain 125lbs or 1.6? 1.6
Is the world really ending? no
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Old 09-11-2013, 09:20 AM   #9
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that was excellent advice!!
we know how to do the program yet we get so frustrated with ourselves

I've been going to WW since March 2012 had a great 11 months and lost 50 lbs...then BOOOM nothing...I would gain 2 lbs, lose 2 lbs, gain 1 lb, lose 2lbs...I've been yo-yo-ing for 7 months I can't get to 55 fricken lbs!!!
BUT! I try to keep in my head that I didn't gain anything back...in fact today I'm down 2 lbs from that 50...now to just keep the scale going down 2 weeks in a row would be a miracle right now

DON'T GIVE UP!!
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Old 09-11-2013, 10:21 AM   #10
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That's great advice! We did this at our meeting as well (but not on slips of paper, just out loud. Our leader is a little loosey goosey with the recommended topics, which is fine with me. I like that she's willing to have the meeting we need to have).

I guess my advice will be "It didn't come on quick and it isn't going quick." I realized that my weight was gained steadily, but slowly. A pound this week. Nothing the next week. Half a pound the week after that. I didn't gain 10 pounds in a week and I'm not going to lose 10 pounds in a week either. Adjusting my expectations has been helpful. I'd get discouraged so quickly if I didn't lsoe 5 pounds a week.
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Old 09-12-2013, 11:54 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LauraK View Post
On my scale it looks like I might be just past 2 lbs over my Goal weight. I weighed in within range last week- the monthly wi- and I guess I should know but- if I'd gone and been over, would I have had to pay to attend the meeting, even though I already had my required monthly?
:
At our meetings lifetime members do not have to weight in if they have met their required monthly. I have even attended a meeting without having my required monthly and just weight in the next week (so I still met my weight for that month). If you did weight in and were up, I do not think you have to pay if you have already met your required weight (I remember our leader saying that once).
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Old 09-19-2013, 06:21 PM   #12
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That was good advice. You are an inspiration.
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