How out of the closet are you about having had surgery? Is it basically noticable? Is there anyway you could get by without telling your family?
I'm generally a very open person... however, my mother is a complete gossip. It came as a bit of a shock when I heard her talking to a complete stranger about some very private details of my life. There are things I wish she didn't know.... And, I think WLS might be one of them.
That, and she can be a bit unsupportive. I took her to an ultrasound appt when I was PG, thinking that it would be a special moment... her getting to see her first grandchildren. It was okay, but when she started commenting on how heavy I was and how "secure" I must be because she would have been mortified to let anyone see her tummy like that.... (etc..) Anyways, you get the idea... I just don't know if I want to subject myself to the possible comments.
How realistic is it for me to think I can keep it a secret?
Well, thats a tough one. Is your mom with you alot? if so, it might be hard. The first few weeks of liquids, mushies might be hard to hide if she's around. After your fills, you'll be eating very slow and small amounts... how can you hide that?
I don't want you to get in trouble w/your Mom and I'm not saying you should do this but, if it were me, I wouldn't tell her... I'd let her figure it out herself and if she says how come you didn't tell her... thats when I'd say she has a big mouth and would spew my privacy to others... but thats just me.
IMHO, the less people that know, the better. You don't want everyone's eyes on you all the time judging each morsal of food your putting in your mouth.
Leenie - Thanks for responding. And, for bringing up the issue of people watching the food you eat. Egad, I had enough of that when I was pregnant. Everytime I went to the doctor, I got the "how much weight have you gained" question. I hated feeling watched and judged.
I think it is easier to be "in the closet" about it with the Lap-Band than with any other surgery. If that is what you feel is right for you then I think you can easily pull it off.
I've lost a total of 47 pounds since I started considering the surgery. I'm loosing at a rate of about 1.6 - 2 pounds per week. It is a slow, steady weight loss that can be done without surgery (in theory anyway ... not for me personally obviously). But the loss isn't so drastic that it screams "I had surgery".
If you mom isn't supportive and she is a gossip then by all means don't tell her. It isn't anyone's business but your own. Who you choose to tell is competely up to you and you don't owe anyone any explanations.
Now I'm as open as can be about my surgery. There are very few people I haven't told. But that is because I was so excited to finally be doing something concrete about my weight that I just blurted it out all the time.
But my friends and family are super supportive and I didn't have any fears about them being anything but.
I do get tired at times of having to answer questions from people who don't understand that Lap-Band surgery is not by-pass surgery why I'm not loosing as fast. I do, ocassionally get tired of having a few people who are food police asking me if I "should" be eating something or looking at my plate to see how much I have eaten.
But so far being open about it has worked out okay for me.
I always, though, maintain the right to refuse to discuss it with someone or not to tell someone if I think they are going to be difficult or not supportive.
How do you know if your band has been filled enough?
With that asked, this is my situation. I got my first fill on May 23rd. I did the swallow test to find out that the water would not go down; so I had a PB of water. Ok, so my doc said that is called obstruction. So I went back on the table to take out 1.2 cc of saline. Did the swallow test once more and all is well. Now, I don’t know if it feels any different than before. My doctor said I should feel something like a small road block but I don't. I can still drink a 12 oz protein shake with no problem which I was doing before the fill. By the way, I am on liquids for a 1 week.
So back to my question, how do you know if your band has been filled enough?
Banded 3/20/06 - Band Removed 12/9/09 - RNY 1/08/13
Weightloss Journey Began, August 2005
Wow Debo, sounds like you have a really agressive fill doc. Mine is very conservative and puts in maybe .2 cc at a time.
It sounds to me like you need a small fill if you're not feeling any restriction, but you won't be able to tell until you're on solid foods. Hold off making the call to them until you've given yourself at least a week on solids. You'll know you're at proper restriction when you get there. Your body will tell you. You'll feel the food sitting in the pouch and moving through slowly. It's kind of wierd at first. When you feel that, try not to make the mistake of eating too fast or too much. It's a whole learning process thing and you really, really have to pay attention to your body. That was probably (and still is!) the most difficult thing for me.
Oh yeah, it will probably take a few fills till you're at that sweet spot. And don't be surprised after you've reached the sweet spot if you lose restriction after awhile. As you lose, the fat pad around your stomach will shrink, making the band looser, so you'll have to get another fill to compensate. It's a whole lot of educated guesswork.
My first fill was 1cc.. didn't feel anything, 2nd fill was .5 cc..okay we're getting better, 3rd fill .25....so now I'm at 1.75. I can eat a decent amount but don't really want another fill yet b/c food does get stuck and I think I'm good for now. I'm losing extrememly slow but thats my fault... mentally I'm not ready to eat any less than I am (and picking inbetween meals is messingme up too). I go back june 16th and I'll prob get another .25.
Deb, my doc didn't give me my first fill until I was 4 months out. I was so angry because although I was losing weight, I was fighting it and doing it on my own, the band was not restricted what so ever. Doc said as long as I was losing he wasn't gonna fill me.... SOOOOOO!!!! I decided to gain....yep, 2 lbs and then finally he gave me my first fill. That was in febuary and I was banded in october.
I waited exactly one month inbetween each fill because I did want to go slow and I was afraid of jumping the gun. I have read that some times fills take a while to kick in so I wanted to be sure. I'm going back in June (16th) for another, so that will put me at 2.0.
I can eat ALOT!!!!!!!!!!!! at this point its just that I want to do this slowly and if that means not losing so fast than thats okay. I also have to learn to mentally be ready to give up my first love and thats food.
I'm working both sides of phycho street here and its tough.
I've only lost 40 lbs since october 25th but I"m really okay with that, I'll do better once I start exercising too lol. 55 more to go
Hı everyone.. I had Lap Band surgery on 12/06/06. And so far, I have lost about 30 pounds, and I am not happy. I am depressed. Because sometimes I eat just fine, as much as my family does. It's like I haven't gotten it smaller at all! I only had 1 fill, and maybe that's why, but I am really unhappy. Because I look at other people, and all have lost more than me. I know I shouldn't compare, but I hate exercise, and I hate everything... I am pretty depressed...
__________________ My Mini Goal:
To be achieved by 31st of December
My Ultimate Goal
Last edited by neverland : 09-06-2006 at 07:10 AM.
If you've been filled since December of last year and you've only had one fill ... it is no wonder you're frustrated.
The band doesn't really "work" until you have reached a good level of restriction. Very rarely does on reach a proper level of restriction on one fill. I strongly suggest that you talk to your doctor about another fill.
Keep in mind that on average it takes 3-5 fills to find the level of restriction that works for you.
And I know you hate to exercise. I firmly believe that most of us do dislike it to some extent. But we often have to do things we don't like to get the results we want.
So talk to your doctor about a fill and start exercising!